All Comments on 'The Wrong Pen Pal'

Great story!

5

Good love story.

That went the opposite direction I was anticipating. I truly assumed Etta would be the equally atrocious gold-digger as Wendy had been, though her continued flirts (as I perceived them to be) with her future father-in-law seemed a little uncomfortable. No matter. 5*!

Lovely story, sadly too many people all around the world have lost family & friends in the last 3yrs and we are still losing people, that said it has been wonderful reading a story about the green shoots of regrowth and repair to loving relationships, and yes there will be gold diggers of both sexes looking for a free ride as always. But that aside, great writing, good characters and a storyline that flowed at a good speed and didn’t stall, although Brian must be a bit dim to not get the message from Yvette the first night they spent in the same bed, but sometimes us guys aren’t the sharpest pencils when it comes to relationships.

Many thanks for writing and posting, cheers Ppfzz. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I am sure that with the list of authors that I've seen, you will have a lot of competition. Great story.

A beautiful story beautifully told. The characters are well built and the story developed so well. I could not help myself; I wanted the happy ending with Yvette and was so happy that I got it.

OK

But when he called her “Mon ami” instead of “Mon amie” it grated because unlike many Literotica stories, this was not full of grammar, spelling and homophonic errors.

Love the story, thank you!

Nicely done. Wendy’s transformation was fairly abrupt but travel, particularly to foreign countries, can bring out the worst in most of us.

Love a happy ending. Really well told. Thoroughly enjoyed this.

An emotional story with the death of Stacy, a very sweet story.

...but what was in the chest, damn you Etta :-)

A very well told story that kept me entertained. The characters you describe have convinced me. The only sad thing was the death of his first wife, without which the development of the story would not have been possible! Thanks for the good work! 5*!!!

Loved it a very nice romantic story 5 stars

This was a very enjoyable romance. Nice job.

A thoroughly enjoyable read. Thanks.

A classic SouthernCrossfire story. intricate, detailed, with a lot of emotion and beautifully written. I enjoyed it immensely. Thank you.

While the title gave the ending away it was a very good and well developed story with an emotional mix of sadness of loss, the humorous misunderstanding about Etta, disappointment of Wendy’s gold digging, and finally the realization of Brian and Yvette’s union. Enough going on to keep up interest through seven pages without dragging at all. Thanks for a good read. 5 Stars.

Wonderful love story, enjoyed it. Keep up the great work.

A fine story. Thank you very much for writing it. I look forward to your next story. Randi.

So well done, from beginning to end, absolutely loved it. Even the fact that Etta ended up with his son. 5*

You are an Exceptional Storyteller with a very good word flow...

I always thoroughly enjoy reading your stories...

This one being no exception!

5 🌟s

FH

WONDERFULLY ROMANTIC STORY, EVEN WITH IRONY THAT A DEATH BEGAN IT. IF SHE WAS STILL ALIVE, DID THEY TRACK DOWN THE SPANISH TEACHER TO INVITE HER TO THE CEREMONY?

All I can say is WOW! I’ve never read your stuff before, normally trolling the LW genre among others. Great story telling with some finesse in areas I’ve never seen on the site before. Rather than the typical blunt force approach to relating a couple’s past through narrative, you relating through conversation and reflection with Etta was masterful. Randi’s event is exposing me to a greater pool of excellent writers than I expected. I should have known better as she is always aligned with excellent writing, so lesson learned. Again, great work and I plan to read your other stories when I finish the event. 5+*

A tale that had the important ingredients for my personal enjoyment: good plot, excellent character development, good grammar and realistic dialog. A good 5* outing. I would not be living up to my handle if I didn't have a nit to pick, so: author should check out the difference between "phase" and "faze".

Great love story! Plot, dialog, character development...all are first-rate!

It's actually "ma cherie," not mon cheri. Mais une tres belle histoire!

A great read. Very well put together and plotted. 5 stars to you.

Hooked

⭐⭐⭐⭐

Love the plot. While I never really felt like I was getting inside the head of the narrator it kept me interested and was believable.🙂

Really liked this story.

Always enjoy your writing Love the Etta curve

Fantastic story, a great mix of emotions, in a realistic and contemporary setting. Seriously, it’s very well conceived and written, very enjoyable.

In October and November of 1981, I was dating this little Cajun lass. She was returning home alone after a night out with her girl friends. I'll probably never know for sure, but my best guess is that she fell asleep while driving and ran off of the road. She ended up rolling her car and was killed by the wreck. I've carried that loss with me my entire life because I hoped to someday marry that girl. I already loved her that much, but she wasn't quite there yet herself. I'll never know if she would have come to equally love me too given more time.

That being said, you having Staci marry Brian after shooting him down over and over struck a chord. My girl never broke up with me, but she easily realized how much I fell for her and asked me if we could still be kind of close but a little bit chilled. My gut feeling is that she wanted to be with me but at the same time my sincerity scared the crap out of her. She probably could see how easy it would be to wrap me around her finger and that kind of power scared her too. She knew that I would be totally devoted to her. Pretty scary stuff for a 20 year old who thought she wasn't ready for a forever relationship.

So yeah, reading this stirred up tons of buried emotions. 4/5

Awesome romance. Glad there's no cheating!!!

What an awesome love story, the storyline was perfect the way it advanced from Brian and Yvettes youth where fate first introduced them, then through the sadness of the loss of Staci to Covid. The drama and the timing of the having Yvette as his Mrs. Right was perfect. Excellent story with a perfect happily ever after ending. Well Done 5+++++Stars.

Author's Response: Thanks so much to everyone who has read this story and to all who've commented, either here or privately, or favorited it. Thanks, too, for the correction on the French words (I don't speak French, if you couldn't tell) and the phase/faze oops.

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As a follow-up, I had a few people ask about the contents of the chest and about Kyle and Etta. I'm glad to report that these issues are covered in my follow-up stories, (1) "Key to Her Heart?" and (2) "Calling the Stork." While both of these are standalone stories, I suggest reading them in the order shown to minimize spoilers.

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Thanks again to all,

SC

I told myself that I wouldn’t cry after reading anymore of these stories but I have failed. I put myself in Brian’s place and it brought up my feelings from my wife’s passing and I now sit here in tears. I’m so glad Brian and Yvette finally were together.

Excellent story, but a tough read for me. I've worked in healthcare for 40 years (requiring more than 4 years of college and needing a license, I'll leave you to figure that one out). I've watched WAY too many patients die alone, some begging to see their families one last time and I've had to comfort families that wanted to see their loved ones. It has left many of us in healthcare broken and depressed. Even though this story is fiction, it gives me hope that some of the people I've seen who had their whole world stripped away is a relative heartbeat may, in time, find some kind of happiness again. As for me, I've retired from the profession I once loved so much, not because I wanted to, I just can't do it anymore. I thank you, SC for giving me a much needed boost. They are hard come by for me lately.

This was the first SouthernCrossfire story I've read. It shows perfectly why I try to read all the stories that are in any given challenge; it's amazing, and from a writer I'd never heard of. As as 26+ year health care worker (ICU) the COVID section was particularly gut-wrenching, but you've given us a beautiful tale wrapped around that.

Thank you.

Thanks for a great story. Paris is a wonderful city. Seems you know it.

Wonderful romantic tale, from a heartbreaking loss, through misunderstood attention from a too-young acquaintance and unpleasant attention from a golddigger, to finally connecting with his long-lost pen pal. Everything rang true, even the sudden wealth since it was the reason for writing the story. Thank you, even though it's hard for this old fogey to identify with a man finally finding his true love.

What is love? how does it happen? how does it grow?

An emotion evoking story, that is very well written and a number of out standing characters. 5

A well crafted tale showcasing how real life often plays out. 5🌟