All Comments on 'Therapy, She Thought it Would Help'

Great story

So here's the genius with this author on this story. At first glance and and superficially you think the bad guy in the marriage is the husband.

But when you really think about it...if you've ever been in a long term and committed relationship you realize Cag was setting us up here.

Because think about it. This marriage amd relationship didn't just "appear" 8 years in like this. This guy didn't just change overnight into someone else.

This wife, Kush, was married to her husband for rhe better part of a decade.

She didn't know any other adult better than she did her husband. That means she met him and was attracted. She accepted a date request from him. She went out on a 1st date with him and agreed to keep seeing him. She dated him for probably at least a year. She had sex with him and kept seeing him. She agreed to his marriage proposal. She planned a wedding with him. She looked him in the eyes and said "I do". She moved in with him. She lived with him. She got pregnant by him. They had babies together and brought them home from the hospital together. They coordinated midnight feedings and night schedules to take care of the babies. They arranged work schedules together around their children. Took family vacations together.

She knew her husband. Completely. His temperament. His moods. His sense of humor. His dislikes. His likes.

So...if you think about it...she was already "out" of this marriage when she booked this "retreat". Nobody who had lived with, dated, married, and knew this husband character would have ever even considered that this group therapy would work. Not in a million years.

So Kush booked it and used it knowing she would get one of two possible outcomes. First possible outcome (and most likely) that he would simply refuse to discuss their issues publicly with a bunch of strangers using therapy methods that he did not agree with. This would then justify her divorcing him. Or second possible outcome that her emotional blackmail would actually force him to be compliant to her wishes. Which means she'd be able to continue to blackmail him with the "if you don't do this then I'm afraid we're done" line more and more.

I know the author wrote this husband character as a charicture of the classic old school male. It was over the top. No man who actually loves and cares about his wife (and children) in any way is going to ignore the repeated lines of "if we can't fix this then I'm gonna divorce you" lines and then act like an asshole. He may not agree with the group thing...but he'll agree to couple's counseling.

But here's the thing. The truth is we all have different love languages. Some need constant affection. Others no. Some need to discuss things...all things...constantly. Others do not.

A decade into this relationship and Kush "knows" what her mate's love languages are.

And it's fine if she simply became tired of how he was, and wanted out. And told him.. But that's not what we got here. We got her talking to this quack Melody who runs a new age, group therapy retreat for couples...talking to her for MONTHS behind her husband's back. Sharing who knows how much of a one-sided story with her. Setting all of this up to make her husband the bad guy in this story.

When it's obvious who the bad person at the end of this relationship really was. She tried to get him to go along with something he was vehemently opposed to.

I would equate it to someone who was generally agnostic. And their spouse using emotional blackmail to force them to go to a fundamentalist church...and then giving the spouse the ultimatum "if you love me then you'll get baptized into this religion for me."

It's manipulation. And it sucks.

Some men (and women) are just wired the way this husband was in this story. Maybe not this extreme, but shit my own father was married to my mom for nearly 50 years before he passed. Worked his ass off his whole life. Working 2 jobs when necessary. Active in community and church activities. Raising 4 kids. Coaching. My mom worked and was always volunteering for things. They were busy people. They didn't get to sit down and always communicate about every thing. Never went to counseling. Never talked through their "needs" adnauseum. But they had each other figured out 10 years into their marriage. Knew what to do to make each other happy. And more than once lost their tempers with each other. But never tried to use manipulation or emotional blackmail to get the other person to change.

And...Kush the character...proves to us that she really was done, but simply using this retreat as a way to prove to everyone that she "tried" so she wouldn't be seen as the bad guy when they divorced. I mean what kind of a person who isn't damaged in some way and in desperate need of affirmation moves another man into her home 6 months after splitting up with the love of her life and a quickie divorce? That's desperation right there. Then setting up house with him and her two young daughters? Yeah. That's wierd.

It's a fucked up situation described here for sure.

The husband character was so far out there that it's doubtful that he could exist and function in professional society in today's world. And superficially this wife character was painted to be the long suffering saint who just had to move on.

But in reality. She fucked herself in the end. The way the author wrote this at the end..it's clear this ex-wife and ex-husband still love each other. Probably...truthfully much more than they ever will their new spouses. Even tho they maybe were not the best matches. It's obvious she had regrets. Her need for "communication" and for a touchy-feely relationship, and her need to force this on him no matter the cost despite his nature? We'll share our most intimate problems in front of this group or else!" Even if it meant divorce. Kids family broken up. Hurt and anger. It's sort of narcissistic isn't it?

In the end he grew. Matured. Cause reality and life does that to you.. But she didn't really grow at all.

Of course Cagi made the husband look as difficult and stupid as possible; we already know he hates married men, unless he's humiliating them. Most of his stories do just that.

.

I wonder who decided men should be like women, and broadcast everything on their mind to anybody that will listen? Maybe it's better to do what men do, and keep everything to themselves? Who knows? Women love to talk about damn near anything.

.

Remember the movie "Spanglish"? The wife gets caught cheating and she believes the solution is to talk, and talk, and talk, just talk all night, blah, blah, blah; but the husband just turns and walks out. There's a difference between men and women, and I'm not talking about genitals. Trying to pretend like it's possible for men to behave the way women do is just rank stupidity at a fundamental level. AKA "politically correct".

I believe Kushla was a drama queen and bonafide pain in the ass. Everything was somebody else's fault. Violet was head and shoulders above that POS...

After reading this story of two people who don't communicate I am left with questions. Why the hell did he marry Kush in the first place and what made Violet want him after a husband who cheated? Maybe the were both too focused on what mattered to them, his job and her kids, to worry about the rest of their marriage.

A well-written story but I disagree with Payenbrant. The MC was a narrow-minded, arrogant, narcissistic misogynist. But it was a worthwhile story.

So lets see, Kush knows he keeps emotions internalised ( as all men who live in the real world learn to do except in very specific intimate circumstance ), She then engineers this group therapy weekend under the cover as a "couples retreat weekend" and is somehow surprised he wont participate. She then makes this the defining moment leading to the dissolution of their marriage.

The Kush character seems to be just your normal overentitled modern woman running with the extended disney version of what marriage should be.

After being married to the man for 8 years she couldnt predict this ?

If she could predict this, then the couples weekend transforms from an attempt to save the marriage to an attempt to shift blame... accountability being anathama to modern women.

Later she states "No, I mean it. I'm sorry about the way things worked out for us. Things could have been so different. You know, if you had shown me this side of you, we would still be together"

Yeah, shame its another attempt to avoid accountability. That side was there all along, just she was too blind, so caught up with her wants to see it, now regret sits in.

Poor this time GC, female character is weak, entitled, inconsistent and self contradictory.

@Anonymous Re: CG's "Genius" - Unfortunately, I don't think the she (yes, next anon, she) wasn't setting us up, it's a common theme in her stories that all the fault lies with the husband, that if only HE would see the light and take his wife's correction, all would be well.

As the old adage goes, Acountability is kryptonite to... you know who.

The character development in this heavy handed morality tale meant to uplift SNAGS, feminists, and other destructive and flaky Oprah loving flotsam and jetsam is as stylized and ridiculous as Kabuki.

Really Disliked the Main Male Character

This was hard for me to read because I disliked the main character so much. What an idiot, and mean and dismissive to all women, until his completely unexplained change with Violet. Quite painful.

That is so freaking accurate. Some men take longer to figure out how to emotionally engage and we never want to talk about our feelings, but we learn to be better listeners. Maturity and a little sorrow can make huge changes.

Hmm I think I can aline to Marcus, being bot good at expressing my feelings and also not liking to be dragged into some "Feel good couples meeting" I doubt I would have even gone to this meeting if my wife had pre-arranged to go without my knowledge. One thing I can relate too, is in this life there is always another chance to meet someone more compatible. Time heals everything eventually but this story was lacking in any sexual content and that was more of a problem for me to understand in the placing of the story in the "Loving Wives" section.

I love unique story lines. There are circumstances for all of us where we cannot learn our lesson without touching the hot stove. He did and he did! Well done!

Written by the resident femnazi writer.

4. Loathed the main character for most of the story but I think that was on purpose, he was not supposed to be sympathetic because he was an immature jerk. He thankfully finally grew up and had a happy ending even if it was not the one he may have wanted originally. If this story was longer I might have expected Violet to be fridged so he could get back with Kush.

As I've aged, just short of almost 65 years on this Earth, I can see so many of life's stages in this offering. Indeed, as we grow old, we aren't the same people we were years ago. As I've come to understand, wisdom is absolutely wasted on the young. Re-reading this story for the second time = 5 stars!

First part of this story I thought author was a man hating feminist. I think it when overboard on how insensitive the husband was. Having worked in family counseling, I've seen the most hardened man's man fall apart when facing divorce from the woman they loved, especially how the author portrays his character as thinking nothing major was wrong with their marriage.

The second half of the story redeemed it as a whole. Man realized his priorities were messed up and did better with his 2nd marriage.

Gave 4 stars.

Of the thousands of stories I have read on Literotica, I can count on one hand the stories in which the husband is the “bad guy”. In the real world, I suspect the husband actually plays this role at least half the time. (And I’m a husband myself, by the way, just one with a fairly realistic world view.). So I found this story refreshing. Thank you for writing it!

Having said that, I must also say that this character was a bit over the top - seriously overly callous to his wife’s concerns. But I later learned that you took this tack so that you could partially redeem him later as he gained maturity. Over all, I think this wonderfully offbeat story (by the prevailing standards for Literotica’s Loving Wives stories) is excellent, and more original than most. I experience much the same enjoyment with your other stories’ originality and excellent writing, though I am not attracted to the whole cross dressing theme at all.

Please keep up the good work!

Where i grew up, showing your feelings for a male was an opening for attack, verbal or physical. As a child of the 60's I even then, was raised with "outdated" morals and guidelines. Also being Irish never helped quell my emotions, instead i held them inside until i exploded. It cost me several friends and ladies as well. Man am I messed up. You wrote a good story, I'm glad that i read it.

Tough story to describe. The writing is fine. The way it played out, had me wondering where it was going. In fact, I wondered before finishing the 1st page. It felt like 75% of the story, was a “can you top this” about the most idiotic husband who ever lived. He finally saw the other perspective, and changed, but really didn’t seem remorseful.

Couldn't get past the first page!!! Marcus is described and acts like an unmitigated prick. It's a wonder the marriage survived that long. Not really interested in where this goes but the first page turned me off. To each his own and of course the author has the right to write what she/he feels. 2*s.

Geez...could you write the MC husband in any more clichéd terms as you did? Every caveman trope and saying and reaction available in the first couple of pages.

These two were completely incompatible. And it wouldn't have become evident in the 4th or 5th year of being together for fucks sakes.

It would have been evident in the first 6 months of dating.

She KNEW what he was.

What the fuck kind of reaction did she think she was going to get emotionally trapping him and blackmailing him at the resort?

Someone has to WANT to change behavior. You can not drag them to a resort and in open sessions with a couple of dozen strangers think they are magically going to transform.

And that therapist? What a fucking failure. She was trained? At what? How to make things worse? No actual therapist would have allowed or wanted to allow that couple to continue on the collison course that was evident to everyone. After the first public session a real therapist would have stopped them from coming to group therapy.

The only hope would have been one on one therapy hoping he'd open up a little bit without 20 pairs of eyes looking on.

Just a fucking caricature written as some kind of fable full of meaning to men. Like a warning. Again.

At least this shows that regardless of what a person wants does mean the other will follow. Its all about give and take. He was forced to go to that 'retreat' and was told nothing about it. No preparation but she was prepared and even talked to the trainer before hand thus he was on the back foot. In fact the trainer was given a heads up about him and failed to try and work his fears into what she was trying to do. In fact she was on the wife's side and thus she totally failed in what her objectives were. Which proves what she was doing had a floored frame work for the course to start with. Had she looked at the different personalities of who may be on the course she would have realised one size does not fit all and hence her failure. Had she run a course that took his issues into account and worked the wife being a demanding person in it may have worked. The husband lost his way trying to provide for the family and the wife was somewhat pig headed and demanding. "We are going regardless." On the other side why did he not take her golfing or whatever or do things together. It only a story but a lot can be gleaned from it. The story title 'THERAPY, SHE THOUGHT IT WOULD HELP' was no good as it was the wrong therapy for him and thus or them.

Enjoyed the story. The ins and outs of relationships are important and most couples do no spend enough time in their development. Even after 50 years I know that my wife and I do not. Thanks for your writing.

Truth be told I was kinda like that too … “new age bullshit”.

Great story! What a turnaround for him. His ex appreciated his change also.

He really never understood what he was doing wrong until years after the divorce.

Bill S.

In my opinion it was mostly her. Her wants, she was trying to mould him into her world instead of each others. She booked the retreat without him and knowing he did not want to go forced him to go and he rebelled against it. Natural if you look at it. Me, I would have left her there, the outcome would be the same whatever he would do and he would have felt a lot better. He married another woman and they are fine, thus it looks like the first wife changed and then did not fit into what they had originally.

This is a very thoughtful and real life story and some of the comments are near genius.

1) Marcus was immature and probably the product of a non-nurturing home. He was a good hard-working man doing his best but did not understand how to love with understanding. His fear of the unknown are not unusual. The therapist was stupid, she was really a salesperson with a program to sell, but obviously was not well trained or she could have approached him differently. I would call her and her husband dangerous for pretending to be psychologists. I know they are fictional, but I wish the were real so they could be burnt as the dangerous phonies they were. Though they had some good methods I have used successfully, they did not know how to use them properly for Marcus and she admitted to pre-working with the wife so the woman should have been able to do some real good with the husband.

2) The lack of a strong spiritual background added to their problems.

3) At least in the end the children did not suffer unduly.

Typical baloney story written by a man hating feminist women … eff you and your man hating, toxic male masculinity BS. Made the man out to be a Rufus like all the TV shows do today. Man hating is the new American thing - right! Eff you all!!!!

I got bored after three pages of redundant Marcus being an ass. It felt like it wasn't progressing.

Counselors (fake really) killed thr marriage. Husband had no patience and had issues, but all the wife's concerns were magnified, exaggerated, and pushed to the forefront. And their marriage which had issues just exploded without a chance to survive.

She books a weekend away without his consent. She goes off with other couples, he's isolated at the retreat... I was expecting this LW to go somewhere else.

5/5

Nato_

1star. What a load of crap. She was so self-centered and selfish that she could address the first issue he had before trying a couples group therapy. He, like many people, don’t care to air their feeling outside themselves let alone to a group of people. She should have tried for a private couples counseling first. But nope. She put all her eggs in a basket that was never built for him. That’s sad that she threw away a marriage just because she wanted a fairytale right out of the box.

A man needs to grow up before having a family. He learns from his mistakes the second round.

The first part, during therapy, was over the top. Too much cliche. The second part after the divorce was very good.

Why are the men so frequently portrayed as clueless assholes in this author's stories? Not always and she/he has some skill as a writer,but..... The premise of the week-end retreat is deeply flawed because many people, especially men, won't open up about personal issues in a group setting. Sorry, but that's not a weak or wrong headed reaction; they don't want to go into intensely private matters in front of a group of strangers.

Kush (the 1st wife) sounds like a woman who is entirely into the touchy feeley "I want to talk about our emotions" mindset; she shows no respect for her husband when she gives the ultimatum that they go to the week-end or the marriage is over. She should know in advance that this is going to fail. Has she previously asked him to go to counselling together? If so, has she ever laid it out as an ultimatum that they will divorce if he does not participate? Has she gone on her own and gotten any advice as to how to deal with her apparent wants?

It looks to me as if he was ultimately better off getting divorced and then meeting Violet. As for Kush, who cares?

This was a good story, well executed, 5 stars. Showed a real slice of life. An earlier comment was correct….men especially, but women too, need to have matured when kids come. The couple need to put the kids first then their spouse NEXT. Then it works.

This author needs to find THIS balance….say it again balance between the male female roles. They have equal roles and responsibilities and should held responsible for their failings EQUALLY. Their portrayals within the stories should be realistic and AGAIUN….both held equally responsible for their failings. Their roles are not necessarily sex dependent in a family…..but their equality in all things should be portrayed fairly. This would cool outraged comments and at the same time increase the value and overall interest in the stories told. R.H.

She was an airhead and he was a dick, but they got it sorted in the end.

I'm at a loss as to what is being portrayed here. MC is an over-the-top lout. Can't try a little to get into the weekend retreat, even when his wife is begging? So what if it isn't quite his kind of thing.

So our authoress creates this guy, whacks him with the loss of his relationships to the dearest people in his world, and makes him watch as he is replaced. Then he gets other chances, misplays them, get luckier than he deserves, learns to do better, and gets a happy ending. But at the end, the things the first wife said, taking some share of the blame.

OK. My guess at the point of the story. Look at yourself. Marriage is hard. Suck it up. Parenthood is hard. There are costs, things that have to be dropped or scaled way back, just to "complete the main thing, the marriage, the family". Don't major on your golf game, or such things! If that's it, it's a very important point to make!

While it was obvious you were trying to make a point or two, you made them very well.

Throughout this whole story neither of them faced their feelings head on. She wanted but what? He fought the retreat but never offered an alternative. They should have never married as a common ground was not impossible,

Couldn't get through the 1st page

Broad strokes, but landed well and skillful writing employed in the service of a good story.

Good thing it wasn't from Ray's perspective, or it would've probably ended with Kush and Marcus doing the dirty behind their partners' backs.

"Why are the men so frequently portrayed as clueless assholes in this author's stories?"

Most of the non-cuck LW stories here have pretty horrible portrayals of clueless selfish women, so having a clueless, uncaring guy as an MC is a welcome change.

Well written. But Marcus really is a dick. :-)

Awfully good story. Lots of characters with lots to learn. Both spouses shared responsibility for the failure of the first marriage.

Thank you! A young man who grows up and the women who make him grow up...

He was, and still is, a jackass

5*. Author has tendency to pick on the male part of the marriage. But other authors can't write a story but one that has stupid slut wives and husbands who are saints. Fact is we are really surrounded by clueless mean and women.

weird story for this site.

well written but kinda boring and had a couple of characters that were really selfish/stubborn. Add in how quickly she moved on and how immature he was, they were an unlikeable couple.

Not even through the first page and I couldn't stand this Marcus character. What the hell does she see in this prick? Weird that I was actually rooting for a divorce in a LW story where no cheating had occurred (as far as I knew). Hard to believe someone is that much of a narrow-minded idiot.

I find the story somewhat amusing. I mean he was literally told he would be divorced and he couldn't put aside any of his bullshit. Then acts all upset. It's like the same kind of selfish, delusional behaviour that some of the cheating wives have in those stories where they want a fling then come home afterwards to be forever faithful. I can't help but laugh at the absurdity of it.

It was quite a depressing read, showing how someone can be so blindly self-destructive and stubborn in their ways that they end up losing everything they care about. A bit of an eye-opener if this resonates with you; heed the lessons.

Marcus was an unsavory piece of work. Divorce was inevitable.

You write some great stories but I think this one is your best

Marcus was hard to take while married ( for me) but he almost inexplicably did a 180, even after screwing half the city. I did like the new Marcus, and the blended families. Four solid stars.

JPB

Marcus was a first class asshole, so insecure and sha!low and full of disdain towards others. Typical psychology-bashing, seems to be the attitude of most of the men in these stories. Of course usually the women are beyond the reach of counseling because they refuse to take responsibility for their cheating. This wife seemed to be a gem but the husband realized it much too late. At least he grew a lot by the end of the story and was able to find love again.

Enjoyed the story and the characters you brought to life although not a likeable character your protagonist Marcus was, for the most part, was broken rather than evil and i empathized with him despite the rather obtuse view of reality he personified. He presented a few valid criticisms of group, having had to deal with a few Marcus's running groups (grief not anything like this was) the Idea that group therapy would work for a guy who was too wound up to open up to his wife struck me as a well no duh. i just dont see how else it would be done to tell the story you told i throughly enjoyed the read and in the end no real bad guys

Now the back patting for a great story is done, i got some issues

WTF does Marcus have against trees??? Thing is he is obviously a broken dude, his wife didn't know that going in? The professional counsellors didn't spot it, instead they confronted him straight on ? Although i think he would see me as one of the "liberal goody two shoes tree hugging dipshits" i might object to dipshit but i am 100% positive i am in someone story so i can see it. Nothing really has changed, what was it that broke him so badly in the first place, that shit will come back to bite him yet.

Unbelievable, not a cuck story. I am shocked! It seems somewhere deep in that feminazi brain of yours there is a slight speck of intelligence.

Ray just vanished

you all run Marcus down did anyone of you think what he would like ?

Well a more traditional plot with no obsequious cuckolding and gaskighting about the male ego after the wife has an adulterous affair. However, the Marcus before the split with Kushla, was not a likable person and was not remotely a good husband. But he does a 180 degree flip for Violet. Has to be hard for Kush to observe.