All Comments on 'Three Strikes Ch. 09'

I really enjoy how you write, but I am really struggling with the immaturity of your characters. They are acting more like early 20 year olds, at best. I’m not giving up on the story. I have hope.

yes please, more....

Gah! Be careful about Donovan’s likeability. Right now, we’re all in love with Shane, but let’s not forget that we’re following Donovan, and this beautiful balance you have going will suddenly crash and burn if we stop liking and investing in Donovan’s happiness. With Charlie and Colin, you skated real close to that line where we didn’t think Colin deserved Charlie or Jesse, but you managed to pull it off, and so that’s a story you’ve already successfully told. From here on out, either tell a new story, or tell the same story better and improve. This may be brutally harsh feedback, but I think you’re an exceptional writer with a huge talent for romance, and I think you can take feedback like this, run with it and score a touchdown. So right now, this is the point where you decide where the story is going to go. You could easily tell the same story again but with a different skin (all the pieces are in place if you want that) and we would love it, totally eat it up. Or you could deviate and go in a totally different direction and take us all on an unexpected rollercoaster ride... I don’t know which one I want more! Probably both! So whichever way you decide to go, just keep up with the writing :D by the way, your sex scenes are DYNAMITE and that’s actually not an easy thing to do whilst maintaining a level of sincerity and realness.

By the way, this is now the second time I have missed a whole night of sleep because I could not stop reading your stories...

Donovan felt stereotyped. Queen stereotyped. Shane is a bit out of his league. He’s very masculine. A real quality I think. I personally don’t blame Shane because I like simple prep myself. But, being he is smitten with a “prepper”, he just wants to find out more so he can blend into someone’s life better, who he likes, a lot. I think Donovan was a bit harsh. It’s not easy to shift your character when you are masculine. Gay or straight. They are learning each other. Takes time. I’ll wager, there’s a bump or two in the road, yet. But, just you wait, Shane is going to defend his man at some point and it’s going to seal the deal for an inseparable bond that will stand as a testimony to Donovan just who Shane really is. The man who is so batshit crazy in love he would go to the mat for Donovan. It’s coming. Thank you for a great series. Keep it coming, please.

Really love your stories. Cannot wait for the next installment. When do you expect to upload.

Awe! Thanks! Who knows if you’ll check this for a reply, but the next two chapters are already submitted and waiting for approval. So hopefully soon!

I dont see anything for this chapter. Just the title. Help!!!

Ah, now that's the best hint to indicate if someone has issues. If their narrative, like Donovan's, emphasizes on the fact that they are "mature," most of the time, they're actually not.

It must be a challenge for you to write it with a perspective of a skewed protagonist. It's always a nice reading experience to me whenever I would spot moments where I would go, "You sure about that?"