Tia's Bucket List Ch. 06

Chapter 06

---The Breastie and the Dawgs---

Hello everyone, it's Tia! Your fierce fashion reporter with another deep dive. As you know, I'm an industrious investigator who digs deeper. And so, I wasn't done researching the different types of marketing. So far, I had focused on the existing customer base, but it was time to broaden the perspective. So, I tackled the topic of market development to find out how to target new customers.

Before I was able to start this project, however, I first had to solve an urgent problem. I had to find my way back to the mall. Remember, I was standing in a carwash bay wearing a soaked, see-through green crop top, tiny skintight black wetlook booty shorts, and sky-high black matte platform boots with 7.5" heels and 3.5" platforms. A saucy head-turner of an outfit? Absolutely! A suitable pair of shoes for long walks in public? Absolutely not!

And so, I became frantic as time ran out. What was I supposed to do? In this outfit, I could hardly ask the staff at the carwash without making them suspicious, nor could I stand on the street to hail a cab without attracting unwanted attention. I was out of options! But things got worse! The situation escalated when the roll-up door opened. Oh fuck! The staff had discovered me! They were about to throw me out or call the cops or whatever!

I was in full panic mode! But there was no way I could hide. My eyes grew wide! There were no employees. Instead, a gray minivan pulled into the wash bay. Where did it come from? And what was it doing here? When the van came to a stop, the driver rolled down the window and stuck his head out. It was a young guy about my age.

"Hello, lady! How ya doin'? Welcome to the banger bus!" The youngster greeted me with a bright smile.

What the fuck? The guy seemed to know me. That confused me because I had no clue who he was. But then again, I had met so many new people lately that it was hard to keep up with all the different faces and voices and all that. Consequently, I became even more confused when the side door opened. Three more guys jumped out and greeted me enthusiastically. Indeed, they knew me! It was the group of greenhorns who had inspected and labelled my pussy. Holy shit! I had hoped never to see these phony punks again. Correction! I had never seen them, so I had actually hoped they'd never see me again.

Anyway, I was finally able to check them out and found that they were all in their early twenties. My hunch had been correct! Not only were they young, but they also looked like a cross between wannabe gangsters and jersey shore loudmouths, so the term 'wangsters' was a perfect fit. Definitely so!

And then I had to laugh. The absurdity was too much. This was no fucktruck, it was mom's minivan! Can you imagine? It made the boys look even more ridiculous! I bet they were dealing weed in their posh neighborhood, feeling like real tough guys while living their lives all sheltered and protected. Coming from humble beginnings, I had grown up under opposite conditions. That's why I couldn't stand these type of wannabe thugs. Not at all!

"Told cha, dawgs! The booty's hot but the rest's hotter! She's a banger n ya can't teach that!" The guy with the white basecap exclaimed.

Oh god! The loudmouths sounded like they had bets on what I looked like overall. They probably had money on my hair color or even my cup size! So objectifying!

"Then it's good the banger boys are in da house!" The guy wearing his basecap sideways replied with a hammy gesture.

And with that, the wangsters informed me that they had spent more than 300 bucks in the Vonderstore. That was why Mr. von Stein had promised them an extra special service. Since I hadn't returned in time, the boss had gotten impatient and sent them looking for me. How nice of him! But surely not out of pure charity. As if it mattered! All that mattered was the result! And since these wannabe tough guys were already here, they could play cab and take me back to the mall in their minivan. That was better than nothing!

But stupidly, the boys didn't let themselves be fobbed off so easily. Instead, they continued talking trash. And I can assure you that I had zero nerve for that bullshit! It had been a long day, and I was exhausted, so I wasn't playing along. My lack of cooperation didn't make things any better, though! Quite the contrary! The wangsters responded by calling my boss and putting him on speaker. As I said, real tough guys!

"Hey, pumpkin! Good to hear from you. I was getting worried. What took you so long?" The Vonderowner greeted me over the phone. "Looks like you found some fans! Ain't that great? Everybody knows you millenitards can't have enough followers. So you don't wanna let them down, do you?"

"Remember, sweet cheeks! You said your ass was for sale to regular customers. That was a helluva motivation for your fans." He elaborated. "Damn right! The boys became members of the Vonderclub. They're regulars now."

Oh jeez! That left me dumbstruck! I felt totally misunderstood. I hadn't meant it that way! My remark about regulars had been nothing more than a throwaway line. In fact, it wasn't supposed to be taken seriously! But on second thought, I can see how it could be misinterpreted. And I oops!

"Gotta say, pumpkin, you've got our motto down pat. 'Sex sells'! Damn straight!" The old-ass owner praised me. "Not gonna lie, I'm a little bit proud how well you're doing as a promo puppet."

"So I've decided to expand your foray into the marketing department. Time to spread our slogan to reach new customers. Hell yeah!" He continued. "But don't you worry your pretty little head, blondie! The boys will help you do it. Have fun!"

And with that, the patriarch hung up. What the fuck? He caught me on the wrong foot! I didn't expect that! And yet, his compliment reverberated in my head. And we all know that I'm a sucker for praise. For this reason, I wanted to prove my boss right. I was determined to show him that he had backed the right horse. I was going to slay this marketing campaign. No doubt about it!

"So again! Welcome to the banger bus! Badaboom, badabang, let's get in the van!" The guy with the backwards basecap interrupted my train of thoughts.

And with that, the special service had begun. And I had brought it on myself. My silly saying was turning into reality! In the future, I must be way more careful with my words. For the moment, though, I had to deal with the consequences of my actions. But first, I had to get my feelings under control, because the term 'banger bus' made me cringe. I understood the innuendo all too well! I'm not that stupid! On the contrary! The endgame was clear!

And so, I found myself in the minivan. With their sweatsuits and basecaps, the boys were dressed so similar that I could barely tell them apart. That's why I didn't even ask their names. If I had learned one thing from the 'booze-n-bitches' party, it was that anonymity cranked up the impact of exhibitionism, making it that much nastier. This was some real kinky shit!

Whatever! There was a fatboy sitting across from me and he slammed the door shut as soon as I sat in the back seat. Since he wore a basketball jersey with 'Real One' written on it, I simply used it as his name. With the door closed, the driver sped off. He was the only one without a basecap, probably because he wanted to show off his manbun, so I called him Bunboy. That left two guys who were sitting to my left and right. One was incredibly thin, earning him the name SlimJim. The other wore a shirt in snakeprint and a matching cap turned sideways, so I named him Sidewinder. And that must be enough of an introduction. Full stop!

But here's what really matters: The guys around me couldn't keep their hands to themselves. Instead, their greasy paws were on my thighs as soon as my butt hit the seat! And those sticky fingers didn't remain on my legs for long. Real quick, the wangsters moved their paws up until SlimJim's fingers were on my pussy and Sidewinder's hand cupped my titties. They didn't even ask but treated me like fair game right away.

And for good reason! After all, my boss had given them permission. Anything else would have been silly. Truth be told, it would have made me doubt whether they were really hot-blooded men. Obviously, this was part of the job description for a promo puppet. And I can't deny that I was beginning to like this type of work. With every passing second, I felt more suited to be a billboard bimbo than a salesgirl. Promise!

So, my top was pulled down real soon. A heartbeat later, I found myself groaning as the wangsters worked my titty meat and pussyflesh like they were dying of thirst. Sidewinder kneaded my bomb-ass boobs as if he were trying to squeeze milk out of the glands while SlimJim fingered my twat as if he wanted to make me squirt. The sheer amount of stimulation was too much for me. And so, my mind got fuzzy as my vision became blurry.

"Whoop! Whoop! Tell me, how long ya been doin' this? Workin' as a customer cunt?" The fatboy asked me. "With them looks, ya could be a fuckin' model, man!"

"Nah, dawg! With them whoppers, bitch can't be a runway model. Glamour model maybe. I say sinstamodel at best." Sidewinder objected in between a bunch of titty squeezes.

"Oh, boys! Oh, gee! Cut it out!" I clapped back because I wasn't going to take that nonsense. "Sounds like you dunno shit 'bout the model business!"

Believe me, folks, I wanted to sound strict and rigorous to set these punk-ass pricks straight. In my sensual frenzy, however, my words sounded much softer and way more bubbly than intended.

"Look at me! What you think I do?" I tried to clarify. "It's obvi! I got all the skills you need. I'm personable, outgoing, familiar with the product. I'm, a promo model for Vonderstone. A hundo p!"

"Yeah, right! Like we ain't heard ya boss callin' ya promo puppet!" Sidewinder interjected. "Shit ain't sound like a model! Sounds like a hoe for hire."

Jesus! That hit different! It was way too presumptuous for such a group of greenhorns. And thus, it couldn't remain unanswered!

"Bullshit!" I hastily clapped back.

But it failed to have an effect, since my voice reverted to a high-pitched drawl that made me sound more ditzy than determined.

"I'm a real model!" I insisted with a pout. "But I'm new to the biz! You know, like a side job."

Of course, I knew that modeling wasn't part of my official job description. But the way these noobs denied my abilities pissed me off. And so, I stubbornly stuck to my imaginary career. Judging by my looks, it wasn't that unrealistic. Not at all!

"Guys, you heard the boss! He told me I wasn't flashy enough to generate a buzz for the brand." I started to interpret Mr. von Stein's words. "Any publicity's good publicity, rite?"

"So the deal's simple! I wanna get rehired, I gotta prove I can make some noise! For sure!" Once on a roll, I began to babble off the cuff. "So that's what I'm doing right here. Generating a buzz!"

OK! I must admit that I was convincing myself more than the wangsters. In a way, I tried to talk myself into the situation. And so, a whole torrent of words gushed from my mouth until I babbled like a waterfall.

"Side job? For real?" SlimJim asked incredulously. "Don't cha tell us you're a fuckin' coed earnin' cash on the side to pay for ya tuition. That shit's fuckin' cliché!"

Au contraire! If anything was clichéd, it was the loudmouths' look and demeanor. But of course, I couldn't throw that at the guys. Upsetting regulars was a total no-go for a promo puppet. The days of clapping back were officially over! It was inappropriate for a bimbo anyways.

"Nah, dawgs! Them shit can't be real! Listen to the hoe! Bimbo's never seen a fuckin' lecture hall from the inside!" Sidewinder agreed with his homie.

"Wait, man!" RealOne interjected. "Look at the hoe! She ain't gotta go to classes. She's fuckin' her profs to get a degree! Betcha!"

Oh no, so not true! Quite the opposite! I was a diligent student who studied hard to get good grades. I had to make that clear! But the wangsters wouldn't have believed me anyway. It would have taken forever to explain everything about my free semester and internship. But I didn't have that kind of time. Instead, I wanted to check off the topic real fast! So, the alternative was much easier and much more believable. Priorities!

"Hihihi! You got me guys! For real!" I decided to play along. "You look like me, you don't have to go to class sessions. There are easier ways to pass exams. No cap! Hihihi!"

Oh my god! I couldn't believe I was doing this. It felt like a whole other person was talking. I had always been so proud of my accomplishments in college. And now, I was betraying all my hard studies. But this wasn't Tia-the-Coed talking, it was Blondie-the-Billboard-Bimbo. And for her, mani-pedis were more important than good grades. Facts!

"Haha! That's what cha look like, bimbo! No curvy coed, just a shameless slut!" Sidewinder exclaimed as the bunch of braggarts cheered.

And that was the end of the subject. My answer sounded logical enough, so the banger boys believed me. As if it had any meaning for them!

---Billboard bimbo goes on a promo tour---

Four young wannabe tough guys had taken mom's minivan to go to the shopping mall, and on the way, they had picked up a blonde bombshell in hoe rags and prostiboots. Nobody will believe that tale if you try to sell it as reality. And yet, it was happening!

"Fuck it! Nuff with the bullshit!" SlimJim eventually interrupted the general exhilaration. "If I got shit right, the bitch's beggin' for a public stabbin'!"

"Badabeat! Bimbo wants sum public mischief... to prove a fuckin' point n end her boss beef." Bunboy concurred from the front. "You're up to get lewd n crude, my dudes?"

As you see, we had clarified why I was the face of Vonderstone, but we hadn't yet determined how we were going to spread the slogan. As if I had any good ideas about that! Definitely not in my current state! As it turned out, however, the bragger boys had already cooked up a solution. Finally, they were useful for something!

"Simple! We combine them shit. Promo gift n promo tour. Like a one-two punch. Bang bang, banger boys!" RealOne exclaimed.

"Yeah, man, let's turn them shit into a fuckin' thrillride, for real!" SlimJim added. "Gotta keep shit interestin'. Whoop! Whoop!"

Come again? I must say I had no idea if it was my horniness or their silly slang, but I didn't understand a word they said. Anyway, the hypebeasts didn't expect the billboard bimbo to understand a thing in the first place. Instead, they relied on showing me in practice. Show don't tell. Bet!

"Yo, dawgs! Wanna know why I stop? A red light's coming up!" Bunboy suddenly announced from the driver's seat. "Everybody's ready for the hoedown? Cuz shit's 'bout to go down!"

And then everything happened superfast. RealOne pulled out a coin and all the wangsters watched in excitement as he tossed it in the air. They remained silent until the coin landed on the floor of the minivan. And then they cheered at the decision.

"Tails it is! Whoop! Whoop!" They shouted across each other.

"C'mon, dawgs! Gotta be quick!" SlimJim took the initiative and opened the side door.

What the fuck was going on? I didn't get to ask. Next thing I knew, there was a tug on my arm and a shove on my back. One second, I was sitting in the minivan, and the next I was standing on the sidewalk. Oh shit!

"Spread the slogan, promo puppet!" RealOne called out to me. "That light won't stay red forever."

And with that, I woke up from my stupor. My eyes widened and my jaw dropped. I was supposed to shout out the promo slogan? In the middle of the street? In an unfamiliar neighborhood? They had to be joking! But they weren't.

"Yo, bitch! Ya want us to drive on without cha?" Sidewinder affirmed that they were serious.

Oh no! I didn't want that. Definitely not! And so, panic seized me. Looking around, I noticed that we were standing in front of a mini-mall. Like the shopping center, it was in the commercial district. Like the rest of the area, however, it was rundown and desolate. There was a dollar store and a pharmacy along with a hair salon and tattoo studio. I wasn't so sure this was the right place to promote the Vonderstone brand, but I had to take what I could get. Period!

"Sex sells, peeps! We sell sexy fits, you buy sexy time. Never forget: Vonderstone means Vondersex! Yay!" I shouted out loud.

Oh my god! If I had waited a second longer, I wouldn't have done it at all! In my excited state, however, my spontaneity came in real handy. And so, I noticed people peeking out of the stores. Even though they were staring at me, I was standing too far away, so they only saw an interchangeable big-boob bimbo in saucy clothes. That totally triggered me! I was anything but interchangeable, I was unique. Damn straight!

So, I shouted the slogan a second time. After all, I needed to make sure that the potential customers had understood it correctly. Involuntarily, I even started walking up and down in front of the mini-mall, doing a dramatic pirouette before returning to the banger bus. As if it were a runway! But whatever! I had gotten the message across. Definitely so!

And then the traffic light turned green. Three pairs of hands grabbed me and pulled me into the minivan. I huffed in exhaustion when I was back in the bus and saw the mini-mall disappear in the rear window. This had been embarrassing, alas super exciting!

Nonetheless, I scowled at the loudmouths. They could have told me earlier. It hadn't been that bad! If I had known beforehand, I probably wouldn't have refused. No need to give me a scare like that! But I didn't get a chance to scold them, because Bunboy was already announcing the next red light. Jesus!

This time, I was just as excited as the boys. Just like them, I held my breath and watched in silence as the coin flew through the air. It was heads! And I had no idea what it meant. Actually, I would have preferred the familiar program. But instead, the fear of the unknown was real!

As soon as the dice were cast, SlimJim and Sidewinder put their hands back where they belonged: on my pillows and my pussy. This time, though, they kneaded my titty meat fiercer and fingerfucked my twat deeper. And the result was as visible as it was audible. My moans pierced the air and my body wriggled on the seat. The sheer amount of stimulation was too much for me. And so, I slid off the bench and landed on the floor of the minivan. Before I knew it, I was on all fours and my head was right between RealOne's manspread.

"Whoop! Whoop! Just in time!" The fatboy exclaimed. "Our college cunt might be new to modelin', but she ain't new to sluttin' it up. The bitch knows her shit! Heads can only mean one thing, of course. Time to give head. Haha!"

Oh god! How presumptuous! But also, how obvious! I should have thought of that myself. So, I let the wangsters believe that it had been my plan from the beginning and fished his dick out of RealOne's sweatpants. Jerking the realest rod, I noticed that his boner started with a slimmer shaft and ended with a wider head. He was literally shaped like a hammer! Swear to god!

And so, I decided to give him a heavenly hummer, because my lips barely fit over his hammerhead anyway. I gleefully let my tongue twirl around the tip of his dick before gently sliding my lips up and down his shaft. Grabbing his balls, I massaged them with the long, red tips of my French nails. Then I opened my mouth and let my lips softly glide over his hammerhead. Instead of taking his shaft deep, I focused on sucking extra hard and vibrating my lips extra wild. My intent was clear. I wanted to add so many sensations that the filthy fatso was overcome with feeling and didn't even think about drilling his wedgehammer down my throat.