Tight Fittin' Jeans Ch. 08

He moved slowly, each stroke like a waltz. Soft and gentle gliding to the music that only the two of them could ever make. The sweetest country ballad he had ever known. A song he had not heard in too long. He savored each note and bar. He could spend a lifetime lost in its melody.

But then the song changed. Rose lifted her hips, drew him deeper. Her fingers sank into the muscles of his upper back as her whimpered pleas sank into his soul. This beat was more frantic. Its steps faster. Fifteen years of need and denial were riding them both as they reached together for the stars.

Rose buried her face in his neck as he felt that sweet sheath tighten like a noose around his heart. It was the most delicious torture he had ever known as her body milked the life out of him. He buried his face into that quilt to keep from crying out his release. That seemed to stretch towards eternity.

He wondered if it was going to kill him as he rolled to the side, taking his weight off her petite body. There were no words for what had just happened. All he could do was draw his woman into his embrace and hold her tight as his heart rate and breathing slowed to normal. He was sticky and sweaty, but he hoped that it did not matter.

He had even started to drift off to dreams that he knew could never equal this moment when he felt her pull back from his arms. He frowned and stared up at her as Rose looked about the room, "What's wrong, sweetheart?"

She bent and pressed her lips to his as she whispered, "I should go. We don't want Calli... We don't want Grace to find out about this... About us. Not now."

Chad knew that she was right. But he sensed that it was something more profound as well. Looking over at the old clock on the nightstand, he saw that he only had a couple of hours to sleep before it would be time to get up and start the chores. One thing about living on a working farm and ranch, there was no sleeping in. Horses needed to be fed, and cows milked no matter what.

Reluctantly, he nodded as he watched her searching for items of clothes that they had tossed about the room. He watched her dress. He frowned when he realized that she kept her back to him the whole time. It seemed that some lessons would need to be repeated.

As tired as his old body was, he forced himself to sit up on the side of the body. He held out his hand to her as she finished buttoning up those cheap Walmax jeans that still looked damned good on her rounder ass. She hesitated for a moment, and Chad feared that she would leave without...

But she did not. Rose took his hand. He drew her close and buried his head between her breasts. He listened for a moment to the sweet sound of her heart beating just beneath his ear. Then he turned and looked up into her face. The tears were back, and this time he did brush them off her cheek.

Chad wanted to erase the pain and the uncertainty that was their future right now. But he knew he could not do either. All he could do was, "I love you. I fell in love with that tiger in those tight fittin' jeans. Fifteen years could not get her out of my mind or heart."

His eyes sought and held hers as he continued, "But those feelings that screwed-up jarhead had for some millionaire's dream can't hold a candle to how this old rancher is coming to feel about the incredibly strong, loving, and adaptable woman that I get to know deeper every day. The woman that girl became may be scarred in her body, mind, and soul, but I meant it. I cherish each and every one of those, darlin.'"

"I want to take away all those years and that pain. Promise you that nothing will ever hurt you or our daughter again, but I can't. Because I can't lie to you or make promises, I know I can't keep. All I have to give you, darlin,' is my heart, my life, and my love. And I want you to know I cherish every moment we had here tonight. The laughter, the tears, and the lovin.'"

He was not sure that it was enough. It certainly wasn't those fifty-cent words or fancy poetry, but he hoped that it was a beginning. And that he would have more opportunities to say and do it better.

But he felt the exhaustion overtaking him. Replete with her good lovin', he embraced those dreams that could never come close to reality, that left him cold and insecure because they were not had in her arms. But hopefully, one day, someday, it could not come soon enough for Chad.

***

"Dammit," Rose cussed as she reached for the iron skillet without the potholder. It only took a moment for her to register the error, but that was enough for the pain to shoot up her arm to her addled brain.

The tears gathered in her eyes, but were they from the pain or the scars that went much more in-depth. She wanted to believe him. Believe the sweet words that Chad had said last night. But it was not just Gerald. If it had been, perhaps she could have dismissed it as gaslighting like all the rest.

The problem was we live in a world where perfection is expected. Women must be model thin. But even that was not good enough. There was no room for things like muffin tops, stretch marks, wrinkles, or grey hair.

How many plastic surgeon's business cards had well-meaning friends passed to her? Hell, even her personal trainer had kept on about how she could only go so far with diet and exercise. Like a tummy tuck was some life-saving medical procedure. Heck, one of her friends had even had her... Down there, rejuvenated.

She knew where her aversion to cosmetic procedures came from, of course - her mother. The woman had it all nipped and tucked. Of course, Rose knew that those procedures had improved somewhat over the decades. But she still feared to look as plastic and artificial as the woman who had given birth to her.

Hell, growing up, the only time her mother paid her any attention was if she took her to the salon to have her hair curled or a mani-pedi. But Cassie could never sit still for long, and once her mother discovered that her only child would never be a raving beauty queen, well, even those rare interludes vanished.

So, how could she? How could she believe what he said?

Oh, sure, when they laughed in bed, something she had never done like that before, or when he touched her and sent her whole body into overload, she could forget it all for a moment. The things that man did to her, had always been able to do to her, were mind-blowing. When he touched her, there was no room for any thoughts, even those.

But before, getting naked, with someone for the first time in over a decade, had been almost insurmountable. A couple of years after Callie was born, she thought it would be a good idea for her daughter to have a little brother or sister. Though she had to practically hog tie Gerald and force him to have sex with her, she had wanted another baby badly enough to endure the humiliation. But after a couple of years of trying, he had told her no more. That she had one brat, that would have to be enough. Of course, now she understood why.

Her throat tightened, and more tears welled in her eyes as she tried her damnedest not to burn the bacon. After a few months at the gym, she had gotten into the habit of showering and changing at home. Those sly looks of superiority and pity from the perfect silicone Barbies in the locker room was just too much.

Chad's words had been incredibly sweet. And the way he kissed, touched, and held her, even afterward, made her almost believe it. Of course, she had heard what he said about that tiny bit of extra padding around his middle, but things weren't the same for men. The pressure for that perfect bod was not as intense. Besides, she kind of liked it.

The problem was, what was she going to do? As uncomfortable as she was in her skin, she could not see herself turning down any opportunity she might get for a repeat performance of that. Damn, the before and after aside, it had been every bit as good as she remembered. Maybe better. And while she might have relatively little to compare it to, at least in real life, that was hotter than most of her romance novels.

If she were in Houston, if she had access to all Gerald's money, or whoever's, the answer would be easy - Vicky's Engima. Sexy lingerie, corsets, you name it would cover the flaws nicely. But she could not ask him to spend even more money. No matter what he said, she was sure that taking them in like this had made a severe dent in his savings. Of course, she had the five grand that Gerald had given her, but she could not risk a shopping trip, and online stores did not deal in cash. Besides that, indeed, was her Plan B. More like Plan Z now.

"Dammit," she cussed again as she smelled the bacon start to burn. She managed to clear her eyes enough to see that it was only a couple of pieces. She would eat those herself. She placed the pan on the back burner to keep it warm.

Once more, she debated waking Grace. But it had been so late when she finally managed to calm her daughter. What would one more morning of sleeping in really matter?

Rose added fresh butter to the smaller skillet. Chad had promised to teach her how to churn it. She hoped that it went smoother than picking eggs. Old Maude had gotten her a couple more times this morning. She looked down at her hand as she cracked the eggs into the pan. What would those 'friends' back in Houston think if they saw her hands now? Red welts from burning herself on the pan, a half dozen or so small scratches from Maude, and they were already well on the way to being chapped from dishes and chores.

The thing was she would not trade it for the best mani-pedi at the Galleria. It was not just the honesty of hard work and this lifestyle. There was some calm here. Some solace of the soul that could never be achieved when you needed to be richer, prettier, thinner, more powerful than everyone else.

Rose was so lost in her thoughts, trying to reconcile it all, that she did not hear him come in. Until those strong arms wrapped about her waist and drew her back into his embrace. His freshly shaven face buried in the side of her neck as he sweetly sang, "Hey, hey, good lookin,' what ya got cookin'?"

She burst into tears and turned into his arms as all those fears and anxieties flooded out. Thankfully, Chad had the sense to reach over and turn off the burner. The eggs would not be burned, even if they were cold by the time they got around to breakfast.