Too Boring Pt. 04

I nodded, the acceptance feeling strange, "I think so. That's bad, isn't it?"

He laughed loudly, "Fuck no. I love it. You're fucking perfect love."

That meant more to me than it probably should have. I felt good for being this drug addicted woman. The remaining sane part of me realising how bad it all really was.

"Shuv some knickers on and meet me outside." He walked past me and as he went down the stairs he called out, "Can't have my girl with a cold, dry flange now can we?" He was so crude and I loved it.

It wasn't cold outside but I was grateful for the knickers. It was strange standing outside with my boobs out like this. I know I did it yesterday but it was still different. He'd pulled two chairs from across the garden and was sitting in one not really near the door and was fiddling with some stuff again. I was sort of pleased to see the little glass tube with the dome at one end. I knew what that did to me and how I felt with it. I didn't sit in the other seat, I was too nervous.

He looked up at me, "You wanna hold it?" I shook my head, I wasn't ready for that. "You do want it though, don't you?" I nodded, but that wasn't good enough. "Tell me, no ask for it."

This was different but it felt right, he was helping me afterall. He looked back down fiddling more as I tried to find the right words, "Trent can I have ...." I stumbled, "can I have some stuff?" He chuckled but didn't look up. I tried again, this time using his words, "Can I have a bump please."

He looked up, "Why?"

"Cause I need it," I answered automatically, very quickly. I heard how I sounded, and more just came out of me, "Please, I want and need it."

He smiled, "Of course love, come here," and he stood up. I walked towards him, very aware that I was practically naked, in my back garden and that he'd put his chair a bit away from the doorway. Various neighbours would be able to see this interaction if they looked. I looked around nervously as I managed to get to him. He knew what he was doing, his grin told me.

I crossed my arms over my boobs, to try to hide a little bit. He held the pipe up but then pulled back, "Drop the arms." I did. "What will you do for me to have this?" He waved the pipe a little bit.

I didn't like this game, but I also didn't care. I saw it and needed it, "Anything, please." I wasn't sure what anything meant with him but I didn't really care. I probably would and could do anything that he asked. He raised the pipe again, I smiled and leaned to it, my lips on the cold glass again. It felt familiar, I was excited.

I was getting to be a pro at this. Three lungs full were quickly absorbed into my bloodstream and I was quickly feeling the rush. Again I didn't really know what this stuff was and I didn't care.

3. Time Warp

For the next 9 days we did the same. Chris went to work and Trent appeared, to give me drugs and to milk me. The weekend was particularly tough as I couldn't see Trent. I just about managed to hold it together with a balance of the Orange and White pills. I was following Trent's recommendations carefully. Chris was definitely suspicious of something and I felt bad to keep him in the dark. However, I sort of noticed that the questions he was asking were strange, I could answer them easily without lying. It was like he didn't want to know or catch me out.

A couple of things happened of note over those 9 days.

Sex - I had a lot of sex with Trent and I mean a lot. Chris and I did it once, he was pleased, I was certainly missing something during that go. I also noticed that I'd started to use my vibrator and dildo a lot more. I was almost always up for sex, even during my period that only lasted for 3 days. I was relieved that I wasn't pregnant, but didn't do anything to stop that from happening. I simply wasn't bothered enough.

Outside World - Chris and I went out last weekend. It was nice but also strange. I felt like everyone was looking at me. Like they'd all seen me naked and could tell that I liked taking drugs. I even walked past a woman that I somehow felt a kinship with. We both made deep eye contact and stopped opposite each other. It was like we both knew each other's secret. Outwardly she looked like a housewife like me, there must have been something that drew me to her. We didn't say anything to each other, I could tell, so could she, we shared a smile. Had I been on my own I would have kissed and held her.

Lactation - It happened and Trent was chuffed. My boobs were bigger and certainly now producing milk. It started happening pretty quick but 3 days ago it really kicked up a gear. I was now having to get up in the middle of the night to express in secret, as they felt enormous and tight, and I needed an Orange pill by then anyway. I was expressing 40 oz, over a litre, every 24 hours now and needed to be milked 3 times a day. Trent took the milk away, I think to sell, I kinda liked that I was paying something towards my 'upkeep'. Somehow Chris hadn't noticed this yet, but in fairness the weekend was incoming, it was Thursday and only since Monday it had really kicked in. How I'd keep it covered up on Saturday was a problem for then. Current thinking was that I wasn't going to bother hiding it and just deal with whatever.

Syringe Use - Trent had started to inject the drugs only every other day and we'd started to do so in different places on my body. He said that he didn't want me having track marks, which the internet showed me was something I wanted to avoid. Again it was lovely that he had my best interests at heart, so I let him take control with that. As I now did for a lot of things.

Chris & I - we got on really well. I'm pretty sure he knew I was still taking drugs somehow but he didn't want to know the details. I still didn't trust myself with the keys to the car so he took them away every day. At this stage I wouldn't have gone out anyway, I didn't need to. I'd also noticed that Chris and I were cuddling more, we were also talking and being nicer to each other. I thought that drugs were supposed to ruin relationships, somehow mine was better. Though it could be that I was out of it a lot and couldn't argue if I tried, I dunno.

I was sort of surprised that I was able to take note of all these changes. I felt like I'd dropped half my IQ and didn't care. The 9 days had gone so quickly, really a complete blur. It was like time itself no longer really mattered, or not in the usual way for most people. All I cared for was what time would Trent appear and if I felt too off I took a pill.

At this stage it was all pretty amazing really, oh and I'd lost a little weight.

4. A Test

It was 9:45 am on Thursday morning. I'd now taken to leaving the front door unlocked and waiting in my bedroom. Trent was normally here, by now, so it was a little strange. I mean, he was only a little late, but it was the first time.

My breasts were swollen and sore, I needed to express. I wanted to squeeze them to relieve some of the aching but I knew when I did that it would make them start to leak and that made a right mess. Learned that yesterday. However, I wasn't sure how long I could wait now, they felt very full. I was uncomfortable. At this point I realised that I needed my own set of pumps just in case. Today I'd have to do it manually if he didn't turn up.

Also, I was starting to jitter a little, I could feel a shiver running up my spine. I knew I needed something and that an orange pill would sort me out. However, I also knew that if I took it, it would change how today went.

I needed to wait as long as I could.

Thank god he came only a few minutes later at 9:53 am, just before I was about to text him. However I was slightly surprised when I saw him walking towards the house without his usual small bag. I panicked slightly, I was standing at the top of the stairs when he entered my house. "Trent, ok?" I called down to him a little panicked.

He looked up and smiled, "Oh yer, we're doing something different today."

"Oh." I wasn't sure if I should be happy or sad. It was different, but he hadn't let me down yet. I smiled at him but he could see the unsure look on my face.

"Come down here." This was definitely different, but I headed down to meet him. Certainly feeling my boobs jiggle in their maternity bra as I walked. They moved a lot more now, I mean they used to move a lot before, but now they're just crazy, especially when full. I had a quizzical look on my face when I reached him. He leaned forward kissing me, "You ok?"

"Yer I need." I squirmed before him. He smiled but that didn't help me, "I'm ready for candy and I need to relieve these."

"Yup, put some shoes on. I'll take care of all of that in a moment."

"What? Why?"

"Trust me babe, let's go?" and he pecked another kiss on my lips.

"Go? What?" However I was putting shoes on.

He held up a key he'd found near the door, "These to lock?"

"Errr yes," and I was quickly shuffled out the door as he locked it. I didn't like this, I was shaking a little and rather uncomfortable. Very pleased I was dressed decently, I'd started to wonder about not bothering after Chris had left, glad I'd not acted on that impulse.

During the drive I asked him a few times what was going on and could he help me please. His only answer was to trust him and it would be ok quickly. Well quick was sort of right as we stopped driving only 3 streets away after about 6 minutes. Strangely, I'd never been down this road even though it was so close to us.

Hand in hand we walked towards a small block of I guessed flats and were soon knocking on a door on the 1st floor. It opened and we entered a dark, quiet hallway before we turned into a big room. Whoever owned this place must have knocked two or three flats together but kept the front the same, it was clever. The room we entered was very big, it had about 15 people in it and there was hushed jazz music playing in the background. The windows had the curtains pulled and I had a feeling there were shutters on the inside also, it was that dark.

I had a bad feeling about this room, a rigid knot tightened in my gut, it felt like it wasn't going to solve my two current problems any time soon. Trent still had my hand and he was now talking to someone who'd gotten up to great him.

I looked around the room, what I could see were mainly black men, one or two maybe Indian or Pakistani and another woman. Most were sitting, everyone was chilled, no one was paying any attention to us. Before I could comprehend what was happening, I felt an arm around my waist coming from the opposite side towards Trent. I turned to see a young white woman. Though I didn't recognise her as someone I knew, something clicked, I felt like I understood her. Our eyes locked and like the women whom I saw whilst out with Chris before, we both saw the same expressions on each other's face.

I looked down at her bare arms and saw the dreaded track marks on her. Heroin? Or a cocktail of coke, Meth or possibly a H Bomb? It could be anything, you poor soul, I thought to myself, but I couldn't take my eyes off them. My motherly instinct overcame me, she could have been my own 19 year old daughter Claire. I actually wanted to hold her and kiss them better, they looked so hideous and sore. I tore my eyes away from them and glanced back up to her vacant face, her look told a sorrowful tale. She was much younger than me, but I think it was clear she'd been playing this game more than the 30 odd days I'd been in it.

Trent then moved alongside us, "Emily this is Tracy. She used to be my girlfriend." I smiled as best I could. There was a lot to be unpacked in that simple sentence but I didn't have the mental agility to do that anymore. I did quickly appraise her, she was a little taller than me. Had very big breasts but nowhere near my size, I reassured myself, flattering my ego at the same time. Similar overall build, a brunette with shapely legs, she had a mid thigh skirt on, nice heels and a small white t-shirt, I could make out the bra design through it. Trent pulled me back to my problems, "Do what Tracy says. Right?"

"Can I have something first?" I couldn't help myself.

Tracy spluttered a laugh and Trent answered, "Soon love, soon." With the utterance of the word 'love' from Trent lips, I saw something on Tracy's face that troubled me. Was it disdain or jealousy or fear, I dunno?

I pensively turned away from her to face Trent, "Please Trent I need some and ..." I looked down at my boobs. I didn't want to check but I was 90 % sure I had already started leaking. I didn't dare knock or touch them for fear of really setting them off.

Trent just laughed, "Please trust me Emily." He leaned forward and kissed my lips again. pensively turned away from her to face Trent. He then looked at me seriously, "This is how you pay," he let go of my hand and stepped away. I was about to follow him but I felt her hand on my arm once more.

She leaned into my ear and repeated, "This is how you pay." I turned to look at her. I was worried but she didn't look malicious, fuck I couldn't read her, who was I kidding. I needed help and Trent had just deserted me. A thousand questions raced through my mind, pay for what? Am I not his already? Is he not supposed to be looking out for me? And who is this Tracy?

I turned to her, asking, "Can you help me?"

She revealed an ominous grin, "What do you need, honey?" as she took something from her inside blazer pocket and twirled it teasingly around her fingers. No sooner had I seen it, my mouth dried up, pupils dilated and my pulse quickened. It was a glass, smoking pipe.

She saw my hungry pining gaze and I made my needs clear, "That! Can I get a hit from that? Please!" She simply continued to twirl it round by her hip which prolonged the agony. "I need it."

She leaned in slightly, swaying provocatively, "It hurts doesn't it. Not having it. Craving the high."

"Yessss."

"I could give you anything you need. I have access to everything," and she slowly ran the pipe down her arm. Clearly indicating where the track marks were. I shivered, but my longing only grew.

"Ohhh god, yes," I moaned to her, quietly.

She gave an evil smile, reaching her hand up and grabbed the front of one of my boobs. Taking as much of a handful as possible and she squeezed it hard. God I felt it. I felt relief as the pressure was momentarily released. Yes, my bra and top started to get soaked. I didn't care, I was almost hypnotised, fixated on the magical pipe and the pressure release. Somewhere in my craving mind I knew that I was about to look a total mess, but that simply couldn't come to the foreground.

Keeping her hand there and keeping it moving, she moved her body behind me and putting her chin on my shoulder whispered to me, "See the man over there in the white jeans shorts on the big brown chair." like an eagle, I scanned the room and honed in on him in second, still very aware that she was still milking my breast. "You're going to go over to him right now and get his cock out and suck it." She didn't give me a moment for her words to sink in, as she grabbed my arm and walked slowly and seductively towards him. "I want you on your knees, leaning forward as you worship his cock with your mouth." We were nearly there. "Don't speak to him, he's important, just put your mouth around his cock and make sure he enjoys it. Take your time."

I stopped in my tracks. Digging my heels into the ground refusing to head forward. This didn't feel right. I couldn't do it. "I ... I can't do that." I wriggled, feeling her fingers digging into my boob harder. Her hand must have been soaking by now.

"I'll give you a big hit soon. Start by doing as we've told you to do. Stop stalling."

The next 20 seconds seemed to take an eternity. Whereas the last few days went by at light speed, time in this instance was passing by in agonising slow motion.

For the first four seconds my mind fought this next move. I didn't want to do this. I didn't want a stranger's cock in my mouth. I didn't want to perform in front of everyone. I wasn't in a sexual haze like when I did it before. I wasn't high like yesterday when my boyfriend was fucking me. I didn't want to have my breast leaking like this. I ached, my head hurt but my mind was clear. I was a married mother, I used to have a good job. I still had a loving husband, I needed to protect some of that.

The next 6 seconds I found myself slowly moving forward as if on auto pilot kneeling before him. I'd apparently knelt too close as Tracy moved me back a little bit. He was talking with someone next to him, ignoring us completely. That made it all worse. He was ambivalent to this woman kneeling before him.

The next 12 seconds, I was made to lean forward, supporting my body with my arms on his legs. I was undoing his fly and trying to carefully wrestle his big cock out of his pants and set it free. I had to do it carefully as it was big and didn't want to come out easily. Throughout this intricate manoeuvring and procedure my arms and hands were turbulently shaking. Not because I was nervous, I was, but because I think I was starting to experience withdrawal or a downer or whatever they call it.

Tracy stayed at my side but didn't help, simply watching or maybe revelling in my troubles and discomfort. She'd released my boob to let me do this bit on my own. The man looked down at me once as I was fishing his cock out but moved back to his conversation very quickly. When I eventually had his soft but substantial cock out, he slid forward and down in his seat more and opened his legs wider, clearly giving me easier access.

I can't believe I was about to do this but here I was as my lips parted and his cock made contact. I moved my tongue forward and ran it around the cut head lightly. It pulsed in my hand and the spongy head between my lips almost jumped. I knew he'd obviously felt that, so I did it again, but lighter this time. The same reaction and this time I knew I could feel it starting to grow.

I'd never really been into giving blowjobs and had maybe given Chris, I dunno, 20 in our lives together. My boyfriend before him liked it more so I'd done it a few times for him. I wondered how many cocks I'd actually had in my mouth ever. I couldn't tell you because of the drug-filled state I was in recently. But from what I could think of in this state, this was probably cock number 4.

I continued to slowly work my hand, lips and tongue over this strange man's cock, hoping to please him and hoping to get a reward from Tracy as soon as possible. My aching and leaking boobs, my aching bones, sore head, all still there but very much out of mind as best I could. This was the means to the solution. I hoped.

After what was maybe a minute or so his cock was now hard and I mean really hard. It was pointing up and I had to move closer to get to it. This caused some sort of commotion and I was pulled back from him. I was worried that I'd some how fucked up but he simply stood up and removed his shorts and pants before sitting back down.

I was swiftly pushed back to worshipping his cock. The hand that directed me down stayed on the back of my head. I didn't really notice until I felt another hand back on one of my breasts, then another the other side. I tried to get up to see what was happening but the hand on the back of my head said otherwise. I continued my oral assault on the big stiff cock whilst my breasts were manipulated, kneaded and doughed by a skillful baker.

I was startled and taken aback, I wanted to do something when I felt my jumper being rolled up under me. Pulled over my boobs and left around under my armpits. I then expected my bra to be undone but instead the hands moved back to my boobs hiding in the sanctuary of my black lacy. They started to really work them and I'd swear my bra was now dripping onto the floor. I tried to moan for them to stop but instead just created a feeling on the cock that had him moan. I so desperately wanted to cry out, choking back my tears and plead them to stop but in a stunning turn of events it was he who was now moaning expressing his pleasure.