Turn-About Being Fair Play Ch. 01

I'd always been submissive, for as long as I could remember. Habitually walking two steps behind, making it seem like it was convenient on narrow streets, letting others make decisions. It's fairly easy to pretend to be a shy, nerdy introvert and let that be a convenient cover for being submissive.

What made it more interesting was when someone saw me for who I was. When my mistress first noticed me. First noticed that my behaviours weren't all just the typical introversion, then that I had some tendencies to be a little bit brattish and playful, but always tempered with warmth, care, kindness. Not necessarily typical guy traits, though ones usually good for having an interesting human connection.

And that was what we had, an interesting human connection. Anyone can have sex; anyone can pay for an experience of being dominant or submissive - it's not like I hadn't found a variety of places that seemed like they might have been what I would have wanted, but I'd never been bold enough. I guess I just wanted that moment when I finally submitted - not out of habit, but to give myself to someone completely - to be a meaningful connection, not a financial one.

And she was the one. The flirting online, the late night conversations, even sexting, before the first night where she made me hers. The kneeling on the bed, being bound, feeling the first time application of clover clamps - and the shock being enough to put off a hard-on, at least at first. Making love in a hotel while clamped, while holding back, holding until given permission. Things that were new, and yet somehow so familiar, or at least, not unfamiliar.

Our relationship flourished over time as we moved to a new city with new jobs, new place. And a new bed, which came with four very solid posts. The first time she tied me to it, she'd done something unexpected, just climbing on top of me and pushing herself down on me, filling herself with me. It wasn't her usual style of playing - but I guess she wanted to try out the bed to its fullest, and was surprised I'd had rope marks where I'd been pulling against the restraints.

She'd do many more creative things to me in that bed over the coming months, pushing me further in terms of how much of a painslut I'd actually turn out to be. About how big she could get my cock to swell up, how needy I'd get, how much of a good boy I'd be not letting go until she let me.

One late night, after a particularly intense session, she was snuggled up next to me, one arm under my head, the other around my side, just a hand laid gently on my back.

"Hmmm... I wonder..." That tone I knew well. It was melodic and floating, two parts playful to one part seductress. I started to wonder what idea had crossed her mind and exactly what I'd be in for the next day.

"You ever think of tying me up?"

How do I respond to that? I wasn't going to lie, the idea had crossed my mind once or twice. But never for the purposes of just having my way with her; I'd never thought about just tying her up, having her and that'd be that, because that wasn't how I worked. Good submissive boys, even in their weird moments, don't think about leaving their mistresses unsatisfied.

"I guess I thought about it, could be hot."

"Do it." There was no mistaking that tone. Playful, bratty, talking back of the kind she'd long expected from me, as a prelude to any number of invented misdeeds, an invitation to any number of invented punishments. I'd talk back a lot, and for my troubles earn spanks or slaps or for particularly egregious occasions, being gagged (which, honestly, is just endlessly hot, and maybe I talk back just to earn that).

"Ssshh, lay still a moment." She'd noticed that I'd tensed. "It's ok, you're allowed to be scared, it's not your normal behaviour, I know, but I think it'd be fun."

A few moments passed and somehow in the otherwise still night, she read my mind some more. "Relax, it's not something I'm going to let you do very often, I won't let you turn evil or anything from it, but I think your devious mind might appreciate the opportunities to be had. And, like I said, it's fun."

I think she felt me relax a bit - this woman has always been something of a mind-reader where I was concerned. (This is also why I was glad I hadn't tried to pretend it hadn't occurred to me; don't try to bullshit someone who might as well be able to read your mind.)

"So, come on, do it. Tie me up, play with me, have me how you want me." The playful, bratty tone was back, and this time I was half ready.

"Such a brat, such a brat, eh? Maybe I should tie you up, fuck you and leave you unsatisfied?" Of course that wasn't what was going to happen but responding with brattiness was a good place to start.

In the dim light coming through the window, I could make out her expression - and I could swear her eyes twinkled.

I rummaged around in the toybox, dug out some of the smaller ropes, plus a collar we didn't use much (it was cheap, a bit nasty, and mostly the result of solo play before I'd met her)... she looked at it in the half-light, smiled, and nodded, "if you like..." before letting me tie her clumsily to the bed.

She could see I was shaking, and that I'd made enough of a mess of the tying that she wasn't even tied to anything in practice, but in the moment, it looked close enough. In that moment, she was collared, tied to the four corners of the bed, and mine to do with as I pleased.

We both knew that despite my posturing, what I'd be doing wouldn't be quite turn-about - it wouldn't be doing what she did upon first tying me to the bed, clambering on and just fucking her senseless. But it would be fair play.

I knew that her nipples were sensitive, she often got me to play with them in our usual sessions, and in this situation, I could do as I pleased. Running my fingers around her nipples, lightly grazing nails over the underside of her boobs, before occasionally taking her nipples between my fingers and squeezing.

Of course I'd played with her before, but to her instructions. I had tried to pay attention before to what worked for her, but in this moment, I just went on instinct, lightly pinching, very gently turning and twisting, being amused at every different interaction bringing forth a new sound.

Then gradually tracing a finger down from her chest to her slit. "Mmmm, someone's needy." I didn't recall her being quite this wet before, but I don't think this is any hidden submissive traits coming out, I think this is just that she's having fun and enjoying the moment (and probably thought about it a bit before suggesting it)

My fingers found her clit, started pressing and rubbing in small tight circles, just as she'd done before. "Hmm, someone likes that." At least judging by the positive 'uh-huh' sort of noise, and her hips trying to grind closer to my fingers.

Then as she's getting close, I stop. "Want me to carry on? Or should I just leave you here like this?" I have no intention of stopping but I'm enjoying the closest thing to a power trip that I'd feel comfortable doing.

Again with the positive uh-huh, but this time more desperate, more needy, so this time I get one hand teasing her clit, with the middle finger of my other hand reaching inside, fingertip sliding alongside her front, feeling for her g-spot, and upon finding the slightly ribbed surface... just kept teasing it.

Both hands moving in time, fingertips moving in small grinding circles, feeling her hips buck and move under me, as her eyes grow wide and roll a little back in her head, tongue hanging out to one side, and just all the guttural noises coming out before unleashing a very loud not-quite-scream as she thrashes around in ecstasy, putting paid to my pretense of rope tying.

As she comes to rest, I put a hand on her chest, to seem reassuring - and to reassure myself, I guess, and she sits up, handing me the now loose ropes, and unbuckling the collar.

We lay down together, her holding me again - you'd think it would be the other way around - but she knows me too well, and she knows that she isn't freaked out but that I kind of am.

We talk for a while, about my nature as distinctly un-dominant, but that I had a darker side: a sadistic, submissive slave, potentially inflicting pain to inflict pleasure. She'd known for a while, but had wanted to let me become comfortable with being my true submissive self before expanding my horizons.

She said she wanted to see just what my devious imagination would come up with; a turn of phrase naturally challenging the tone I'd used with her to see how far she could push me as a submissive, and to see how much fun we could have with either.