by regularguy13
I am not complaing but this is more along the Incest category. Please continue it that way. I would enjoy reading more about them getting together.
This author needs serious lessons in basic grammar and required revision editing of the story. The constant and frequent intended wrong spelling of very common words prove the point. Take the "ahh, ahhh," the commonly accepted practice to indicate emotion is to capitalize such as "AH", then when combined such as "AH moaned" is far better. Any author using the garbage should have the story rejected until fixed/edited.
Despite the previous comments, I really enjoyed the story. Hope you continue it.
Thanks.
Its really amazing to me that someone who comments as an anon can give writing advice, what a self centered asshole, if your so damn good where is your contribution to the site? Some spelling issues? yeah, some structural? yeah. But what about the story? I like the characters, I like they way the interacted and if masturbating to your siblings sexual gifts is not incest I don't know what it is. Writer review your work, get an editor but keep writing.
does need editor for spelling but not as bad as some stories posted here; otherwise very good start with a nice buildup.
If you enjoyed this story additional chapters have been posted. They are not shown here because I made a mistake and the title of chapter one does not match the other chapters.
Chapter one was titled "Twins - Sports, Sex & Trouble"
The other chapters are titled "Twins: Sports, Sex & Trouble"
You can find the other chapters if you use the "story search" feature.I apologize for the inconvenience.
This is a great start, how about more?
good description of the soccer game. that Jo is a bitch
Nice and slow, like I like it. But why did it end so suddenly?
I liked the first part, a peek behind the curtain at the secret life of women away from men, amongst themselves.