Unforgiven

The weekend after the show, I got a very welcome call from Jenny. She was very happy to mow her own lawns but had no idea how the mower worked. After some lessons on Sunday and doing some other small maintenance jobs, I was invited to stay for dinner. We were still chatting when the kids went to bed. Then things turned serious.

"How are you travelling Jenny?"

"About as well as could be expected Dave; thanks for asking. I think I've been mentally preparing myself for this for years. Deep down I knew it would happen again. My lawyers have discovered what he had planned for our finances and blocked it all. I couldn't believe the little prick was going to leave us practically penniless. The arsehole. My lawyers are telling me that I'll get the house, child support and alimony, plus 90% of the assets, thanks to your evidence and the post-nup."

"Happy to be of service Jen. Mine said something similar but with only 50-70% of the assets."

"He came around two days ago, begging. I think his lawyers told him the same things mine did and the idea of being financially raped terrifies him. I told him to piss off. The only thing that worries me is the effect on the kids. Sarah is at an age where she can develop fine without a father, but I'm worried about Rob."

"I know Jen. At his age, a boy needs a good, strong male role model. I've been thinking about that. Can I volunteer for the job? I'd be honoured to come into his life and help where I can."

Jenny was silent for a long moment. I could see the conflict in her face.

"Um, I know your ego must be a little fragile at the moment Dave, so I don't quite know how..."

"Don't worry about it Jen. Support for Rob is all I'm offering at the moment."

I could see the relief flood her face. We discussed details for a while.

"How about you Dave? Are you okay?"

"I don't know Jen. I'm still confused as all hell. I don't know what I did to make her hate me so much. Finding her with your John, just emasculated me. It makes me doubt my own manhood. Was I so inadequate that...I just don't know. Destroying her relationship with her kids, her father, probably our mutual friends, combined with getting her fired, just doesn't seem enough somehow. I still feel like only half a man."

"Believe me, I know exactly how you feel Dave."

Jenny stared at me for another long moment. Obviously debating what to say; with herself. Finally, she continued.

"You know what you have to do to reclaim your manhood, don't you Dave?"

Jenny was leaning towards me with steely eyes.

"Yes, yes I do Jen."

"Good."

"How far are you comfortable with me going Jen?"

The steel was now in her voice as well. Hell really does have no fury like a woman scorned.

"As far as you think you need to go to get rid of your demons Dave, is fine with me. You're too nice a guy to allow any lingering hurt to mess with the rest of your life. Let it all out Dave."

"Okay. I'll need an alibi."

"You'll have one, believe me."

When she told me what she had in mind for an alibi, we both laughed for a long time. Boy I needed that. We resumed talking. This conversation was only half over.

"What about you Jen. Do you feel you need some revenge on Tracey?"

"Good lord no. I know what a smooth talking little prick he can be. Your poor wife didn't stand a chance. I almost feel sorry for her."

We parted as friends and she promised to talk to Rob about whether or not he was interested in helping to restore an old car I had. He was and that set the pattern for the next six weeks. After school, he would come to my place and we would potter around. I used every opportunity to talk to him about my ideas of values and we became firm buddies.

After I took him home it was a different matter. I used all my free time to spy on the happy couple. With our bank accounts frozen by the lawyers, John and Tracey couldn't get a place of their own. Tracey was staying with one of her few remaining friends. Shithead was doing the same with one of his. They spent most evenings together before going their separate ways late at night.

Finally, I had established enough of a pattern that I rang Jenny one Thursday night and announced that the next night was it. She arranged for the kids to go to her parents for the night. I drove to her place and parked in her driveway. Then after a kiss on the lips and a, "Give him one from me," I wheeled an old motorbike of John's out the back gate and started it a block away from her house.

Once at his friend's place, I looked around, then quietly shot out the street light with my air pistol. After that it was just a matter of waiting in the bushes at the side of his friend's driveway. He surprised me by breaking routine. He arrived by cab forty minutes later, rather than by car. The reason became clear when I saw his unsteady steps coming down the driveway. He'd been drinking. Now king hitting has never been in my nature. My sense of honour demanded a fair fight. Well, fairish anyway. About as fair as screwing a guy's wife when he didn't even know you existed. I stepped in front of him.

"Hi John."

He froze. Then in the dim light I saw recognition dawn in his eyes. He certainly didn't react the way I thought he would. Well, they don't call it Dutch courage for nothing I suppose.

"Well if it isn't the guy that couldn't keep his woman in check."

Very bad move on his part. Instantly my careful plan of a limited assault went out the window. The wronged beast pounced. A right to the jaw knocked him to his hands and knees. Then my memory got a bit hazy. From later reports, I think I kicked him in the ribs a few times, stomped his kidneys and lower legs before lining a few well aimed kicks between his legs. A 'few' covers between three and ten doesn't it? Luckily my red haze lifted, allowing me to complete the last part of my plan. I lifted his unconscious form and dumped him in the middle of the road. Maybe the police would think he was another hapless hit and run victim, maybe not.

I walked back to the motorbike and rode to a shopping centre. In the shadows, I changed clothes and dumped them, as well as my gloves in a dumpster. Finally, I rode a block away from Jen's house and pushed the bike back.

Jenny was expectantly awaiting my return and grilled me on how things had gone. She didn't seem that upset that I had overstepped my plan in my rage. Upset people don't normally grin like Cheshire cats. When she had every sordid detail, I excused myself to hit her shower and get rid of any potential evidence. I checked my knuckles for bruises. All good.

My eyes were closed as I was rinsing my hair, when I felt a cool breeze, then warm skin. A pair of arms encircled me from behind.

"I thought you didn't want this."

"Screw what I want. You need this. You've taken the man, now you need to take his woman."

I spun around and we kissed. Boy, I needed that. We finally broke apart.

"Besides, when the police come to check your alibi, I want to be as convincing as possible. Now finish up, you great lummox and get in the bedroom."

Who was I to deny the request of a lady. Still damp, I threw her on the bed and claimed her. I am usually proud of my consideration as a lover. There was none of that tonight. I took her as long and as hard as I could. If I'm any judge, she loved it as well.

I awoke in the pre-dawn light as I felt her slip back into bed. She snuggled up to me.

"I'm sorry Jen. I was tired last night. I hope you weren't too disappointed."

"If that was you in second gear, god help me if I ever get your third."

"It looks something like this."

I proceeded to eat her to one orgasm, then made gentle love to her for several more. After that, we both dozed again. I awoke to breakfast and coffee being delivered.

"Hey Dave, some arsehole broke the back window of your car last night. I've already phoned the police."

This was accompanied by a wink.

Sure enough, the police came round and my number plate was entered in their system. Before long it was linked to a reported potential assault last night. It was convenient that my alibi and I were together in a house reeking of sex. The nosy neighbour backed up our story of my car being parked there at the time of the assault, as it had been once a week for the last few. She wasn't to know that I wasn't in the spare room as normal. I was never a serious suspect.

I did see Tracey one more time, about a week after her lover's bad night. She rang to say she was coming over to get the rest of her stuff. When I explained that it had all been donated to charity, she said she wanted to talk anyway. When I heard her car pull up, I looked out the window to see Tracey standing next to her car on the phone. I answered the door in my dressing gown when she finally knocked. She frowned at my choice of apparel but I made sure my face betrayed nothing as I invited her in. I asked her to hand over her phone and handbag, then put them in the spare room and closed the door. She was smart enough to guess that I suspected she may try to record this conversation. With what she was wearing, she couldn't be concealing one in her clothes. We settled into chairs either side of the kitchen table.

"Dave, you should know that I've arranged with a friend that if I don't call within 60 minutes, she'll send the police here."

I nodded at her wise precaution, but remained silent. I had only one thing to say to her and it could wait.

"Dave, could I just say how sorry I am with how our marriage end..."

"Save your breath Tracey. I'm not the slightest bit interested in sitting here listening to you trying to appease your conscience by justifying why you tried to destroy me."

The expression on her face was priceless. It was like, 'who was this guy?'

"Okay Dave. It was you that beat up John wasn't it?"

"Yes."

That caught her completely off guard. She obviously expected me to deny it.

"What?"

"What's so hard to understand Tracey? You asked me if I'd beaten shithead up, I said yes. It was me."

"But why? He'd never done anything to you."

"Come on Tracey. Extra marital sex can't have rotted your brain that quick. When I saw you spreading your legs for him, it completely emasculated me. Destroyed my confidence as a man. Made me doubt my ability to satisfy a woman. Robbed me of my pride."

She was shocked. I'm guessing she'd never considered this aspect of what she'd done.

"That's what cheating does you know. After a while, I realised I had two choices. I could end up a sad, lonely old man, like your Dad. A sexless, vacant hulk. Or I could fight my way out of the corner that you and your lover pushed me into. Does it really surprise you that I chose the man's option? The only option that would allow me to remain a man. Does it? Yes, I destroyed your boyfriend and if I feel it necessary so that I can hold my head up high, then I'll do it again and again. You forced this showdown Tracey. There can only be one survivor. To stop you and him destroying me, I have to destroy you both."

The words were said with such a quiet, chilling certainty that they left no room for doubt.

"Bu...but I hoped, coming in here, that by completely isolating me from friends and family and getting me fired, you were done with me. John and I just fell in love Dave. We couldn't help it. You can remember being in love can't you?"

"Yes Tracey, I can remember back eight weeks. As I said that day; maybe it wasn't your choice to fall in love, but it was your choice what you did about it. If you'd just come to me and said, "Dave, I've fallen in love with someone else, I want a divorce," then I would have been sad, but would have gladly given you your freedom, or fought to regain your love. Whichever I chose at the time. By announcing your intentions the way you did, viciously and cruelly, you declared war on me. Betrayed everything I stand for and everything I thought you stood for."

"What about now Dave? Can you leave John and I in peace now you've had your revenge?"

"Yes I think I can. If only because I can't think of anything else to destroy."

"Thank you Dave."

"Don't get excited Tracey. I'm not the one you should be worried about."

"Huh?"

"No. I've had my revenge on Johnny boy. His wife hasn't started on you yet. If I were you I'd look out for her. She's one mean lady, I can tell you."

At that moment a disembodied female voice came floating down the stairs from the master bedroom.

"Are you coming back to bed Dave? You promised me six orgasms a day and you're under budget."

"Who is that?"

"Jenny."

She ran. With me yelling a warning not to go to the police again. I climbed the stairs to a fully clothed Jenny. She held me until the tremors ceased.

As for Tracey, she took off for places far away. I never tried to find or contact her ever again.

Like I said, Dave's the name and I feel great. I've read somewhere that some people who get revenge on someone who has wronged them, find it a hollow experience. Pigs arse! It's the most effective cure for depression I've ever heard about.

Fuck it. Time to stop dwelling on the past. It's too negative. My new life awaits.

Jen and I never became an item. We did use each other to relieve our frustrations fairly regularly, but there was never the necessary spark to go to the next stage. We were good friends though and looked out for each other. Under our combined guidance, Rob and Sarah turned out well. I backed off when potential boyfriends were around her though and stayed out of her bed until their relationship ended. One or two of them were a little intimidated by me, as I told them that if they hurt her in any way, they would have me to answer to. Before the last one proposed to her, he actually asked my permission. He was a great guy and I happily blessed their union. The wedding was very emotional. With her father gone, she asked me to walk her down the aisle.

It was at the wedding that she introduced me to an old friend of hers who had flown in. With my Jenny, and self-administered therapy complete, I was well balanced enough to have a normal relationship and am now considering asking Jenny to give me away at my wedding. Well, why not?

Without the payback I exacted on the two cheaters, would I have recovered enough to lead a normal life? Hell no.

Hello. I'm Tracey and my life has gone to hell in a handbasket in the last two years. I think I can justify what I did back then. It's going to take some time to justify what I did last week though. Sorry, I'll explain.

Looking back on it, my life with Dave was good. However, it had gone stale. The only thrill I had left was my first Granddaughter. So when John started to show an interest in me, as a woman you know, I felt like a teenager again. He was attentive and caring and what can I say, he swept me off my feet. I knew what we had was wrong, deep down, but it just felt so damned good. Our relationship followed the normal pattern of conversations, to dates, to making out. I can't remember guilt ever being an issue. By the time we crossed the line and kissed, I already knew that I loved him and he loved me. We planned to leave our respective spouses and marry.

A friend of mine, Carol, had been through a messy divorce and explained that her ex had taken control of all the assets at the outset and made it very difficult for her even to engage a lawyer. That's why John and I quietly seized control of everything. I didn't know how his wife would react, but I was fairly sure that my Dave wouldn't be happy. We'd often talked about what constituted cheating and I realised I was going to be well over the line already before John and I made our announcement. I fully intended giving Dave whatever the courts demanded after the divorce. I just wanted to be in the driving seat and protect myself from any retaliation.

It was also Carol who asked me if I'd slept with John yet. I'd never really enjoyed lovemaking that much, but a girl needs to think she's still woman enough to be sexually attractive. I knew my husband still found me so. He nagged me for a cuddle often enough. If only I'd still had the same spark for Dave that I had with John, the whole mess could have been avoided.

So anyway, Carol put doubts in my head. What if John had a tiny penis or lasted five seconds or something. When I did occasionally need sex, I wanted it to be good didn't I? By my stage of life, sex was more an emotional thing, than physical. I didn't expect John to be as good as Dave. Dave was considerate, gentle and filled me up nicely. That's what spawned my final disastrous betrayal of my marriage. My first session with John was thus a twofold exercise. One to try him out and the other, as a final bonding exercise to steel ourselves for the emotionally difficult tasks we had planned over the next few days. Being honest with myself, I think I wanted to snare John's full attention so he wouldn't back out on our plans. Even then, I suspected he was quite a weak person.

I know what you're thinking. Did I ignore the possibility I would be caught and make Dave go ballistic? Did I consider the effect on my father and kids? The simple answer is no. I never expected to be caught and if I was, I never expected Dave's nuclear response. As for the rest, I just didn't think of it okay. I never compared myself to my mother. I was so young when she left us, that she just didn't come into the equation.

After all it cost me, I'd like to say that the sex with John was mind blowing. It wasn't. He penis wasn't tiny but nowhere near Dave's calibre. He lasted a decent amount of time but seeing that I dried up after a few minutes, that just made it uncomfortable. I found myself faking enjoyment just as I used to do with Dave. Men and their bloody ego's, I ask you.

I still have no idea how Dave found out about my one and only infidelity. It's just not important to me. I was devastated when I saw the look of hurt in his eyes when he came in the room. I tried to justify that to myself later, but of course I couldn't. He'd never done anything near bad enough to justify that. My guilt manifested itself as defiance for a very short time but that didn't last long. The thought that my father had witnessed my transgression, and my daughter's words just killed me. The look in the eyes of John's daughter was almost as bad. I had no idea my husband was capable of such cruelty.

When I was called by the hospital, about John's admission, I knew instinctively that it was Dave's doing. The doctors believed that John's broken jaw, concussion, bruised kidney's, three broken ribs, cracked Tibia and shattered groin were consistent with a hit and run accident. I believed differently. That's why I rang the police and gave them Dave's name and car license plate number. When I rang back, two days later, they'd said that he was no longer a person of interest. That's why I hadn't left John's side for the week he was in hospital. I knew he needed my protection.

Until eight weeks ago, if you'd asked me if my Dave could do such a thing, I'd have said, no way. For fifteen minutes, in my old bedroom, I'd caught a glimpse of the new, monster Dave. A monster that I knew I'd created. A monster that was more than capable of unlimited cruelty.

Yes, I just knew it had been Dave. That's why, just before John was discharged, I rang Dave and arranged to meet at our old house. This shit had to stop. Hadn't he had enough revenge yet? John and I were both destroyed, get over it.

It felt sad walking up to my front door. Not as sad as I knew the conversation to come was going to be. How had I gone from loving a man, to thinking of him as the enemy, in such a short time. Before I rang the bell, I phoned Carol and told her that if she didn't hear from me in an hour to call the police.