Victoria's Secrets

"Being held in your big powerful arms gave me confidence, as it was something I always dreamed about. Every day you were always close by, with your helping, steadying hands."

Vicky's hand that held Alex's quivered, before gripping him harder. Her other hand was tense, resting on the table. Was she still holding something back? Then Vicky's one comment hit home.

"Hang on, you dreamed about me holding you in my arms?"

Vicky tensed again, going on the defensive, ready to open Schrodinger's second box, whispering, "Yes."

"But you were Mike then?"

Alex's mind was racing with the implications. The gondola booth had him trapped again. Not knowing what to do or say, whether to be angry, or relieved, or pleased to be appreciated? It was an exciting thought of having Vicky dreaming about having of his arms around her.

"Yes. Before you say anything hear me out first, please?" She maintained her hold of his hand, looking him in the eye.

Her voice remained calm, "I've always felt I was a woman, trapped in a man's body and living his life, not mine. When you knew me, I was I trying out a feminine persona. I was popular with the girls, but not the boys, who teased, and bullied me. Except for you, treating me just as you would any another mate, liking me for who I was."

She looked away, sipping her drink again. Or trying to hide from a painful memory?

"Earlier the previous year I realised I fancied other boys and then on the history trip I got a crush on you."

"Whaat? I had no idea. I loved those trips." Alex's shock cup was overflowing.

"Shush, hear me out." She would not be interrupted now that she had started.

"Your humour always got to me and in Venice you made me laugh so much. I always enjoyed being with you as we used to have so much fun. There we were in spring, in the sun, in the most romantic city, hence the crush."

"That was before the trekking trip though?" All these revelations were leaving Alex a little punch drunk.

"Shush. Yes. Up in the Alps, in all that wonderful scenery, whenever you held me safe in your powerful arms I dared myself to turn and kiss you, but my bravery couldn't quite reach that far. On all those trips I tried to get Rich to take our photo or take selfies cutting him out of the picture, so we would look like we were a couple."

Vicky paused as she produced her phone and flicked through screens then handed it to Alex.

"This one is my favourite. I loved those baggy shorts you wore as your legs were so muscular from playing rugby."

The phone screen showed the two of them sat on marble steps in St Mark's square in Venice. Quite an innocent photo of the two of them laughing, enjoying the evening sun.

There was more to this photo than that, causing Alex to do a double-take, looking up at Vicky, then back to Mike from six years ago. Rather than recognising Mike's features in Vicky, he saw a young Vicky with a short ginger-haired makeover in Mike. His loins stirred, looking at the younger Vicky, sending a shock through him.

In the photo, Mike was leaning back with his one arm behind Alex. So it looked as if his arm was wrapped around him. Making them look like any innocent couple on a romantic holiday. Alex tried to hide his thoughts away in denial.

"Ahem, I remember it being so much fun we nearly laughed ourselves hoarse. We caught you admiring a yellow dress in a shop window for ages whilst Rich and I got the ice creams in."

"I had such a crush on you. Seeing that yellow dress in that designer shop window, I wanted to buy it, change into it and be your girlfriend for the night. Longing to hold your hand and eat ice cream whilst laughing at your jokes." She looked at Alex with a hunger in her eyes that raised his blood pressure.

Alex flicked through Vicky's album and all the photos contained them as a couple and each time he saw a younger Vicky sat alongside him. He passed Vicky back her phone as he was getting a hard on. Was it from looking at an old classmate or a younger version of the beautiful woman in front of him?

"Don't you like the photo?" Vicky questioned sitting back, pouting, and looking hurt.

"No. It's a great photo of happy times, I remember Rich taking it. All those trips were great."

"Do you mind knowing you were my first crush?"

Holy shit, his hard-on returned with a vengeance. Alex grabbed a pastry to give him time to think of the implications. Remembering how earlier he enjoyed seeing her knees, the same knees as in the photo. Panicking, under pressure to answer, his honesty got in the way.

"No, it's kind of nice to know. I never thought I could be anyone's crush. Haha, those shorts of yours were way too tight. Some lads laughed about your cheeks popping out when you bent over, although they wouldn't laugh at you now."

"You liked the look of my cheeks?" Vicky laughed, knowing it made Alex uncomfortable.

"Aha, tut-tut. I have to admit that earlier I noticed your cheeks in that skirt."

She laughed, although Alex was lying. He remembered that in Venice he followed Mike, waiting for his cheeks to pop out. Alex questioned his motives whilst trekking. Had he been following Mike for the same reason, or was it fortuitous that he was behind him to help? Did he have a crush on Mike at the same time? Or was he being protective of his surrogate brother or an effeminate close friend?

So many thoughts bounced around his head, trying to reconcile his growing desire for Vicky and their history as close friends. Alex's hard-on wouldn't go away as it was behaving like both a subconscious lie detector and desire-meter.

"So do you recognise my voice now?" She asked as if she had opened enough boxes of revelations.

"Well, it has been four years since we last spoke. In my defence, it is a little different now."

"A voice coach every other month helps me sound more feminine. Which do you prefer?"

Once again honesty broke through, "Your husky voice does sound quite sexy."

"Sexy? That is nice to know." She beamed.

"So Vicky, no confessions about our ski trip to Austria?" One part of Alex wanted a negative response, and the other hoped for a show-stopping finale.

Vicky laughed, "They grouped me with some girls in a lesson and we saw your group, race down the piste. You were all in tight, sexy lycra race suits and helmets, taking jumps and speeding faster than race cars."

She sipped her coffee and continued, "You were at the back of the speeding group, with the best physique, jumping every bump higher than all the rest. We were all impressed, and you were all we could talk about for the rest of the trip. The girls in my group soon realised I was as smitten with you as they all were."

"That's not fair, you were still Mike then and none of those girls ever spoke to me."

"Oh, that isn't the half of it. Do you remember the 'build your own pizza night'? It took all the girls' guile and tricks to ensure we were paired together. It became my imaginary first date with you."

"Is that why the girls kept shuffling up the bench, squashing us together?"

"Haha, yes, they couldn't stop laughing at your discomfort, but I loved it."

"Well, for a secret date night, I enjoyed it, it was fun, and you were always brilliant company."

Alex's serendipitous meeting with this beautiful woman was too good not to continue further beyond this cafe. The exhibition halls were much quieter now, and they had talked for ages. He realised she would soon need to finish her day. Leaving him to go home and eat or to meet friends and then she would be gone again.

She admitted she used to hold a torch for Alex, which still seemed to burn bright. His desire for her had grown beyond plain attraction. A desire that could have been a seed planted further back than he could reconcile. Never had anyone shown him such affection, nor had he ever felt the same in return. Alex felt compelled for their day to continue beyond this cafe and to become something more tangible before he lost it all.

"Vicky, as it is St. Valentine's Day, can I buy you dinner?" How could she refuse Alex after her admission? Now his palms were sweaty, and his anticipation caused him to fidget.

"Haha, I'd love to, but this late in the day every table will be booked." Her voice betrayed her disappointment whilst Alex felt devastated.

"You did tell your boss I'd promised to take you out? Unless you've other plans for tonight?" Alex Prayed she would be free and whether begging would work as a last resort?

"No, no plans of my own. I was just going to eat in and have an early night. What if I got a takeout delivered to my apartment for us both?" Her face beamed and her posture rose.

Vicky's solution was better than he could have hoped, "We could go for drinks at a local wine bar and order a takeout delivery in order to eat at my place. It is far easier to reserve seating at the table in my lounge."

Alex's heart jumped for joy with this lifeline. His heart raced as his mind searched for multiple options to the future evening's events. None of which helped his scrunched up bulging crotch package.

"Now that sounds like a grand plan 'B'. I'll let Dad know."

"What were your plans with your dad?" She looked anxious, as if their plan could fail at the next hurdle, not if Alex could help it.

"We're staying at one of his ski buddy's apartment behind Paddington. There are a few of them getting together today and have booked a huge take out delivery, so it won't be a problem if I drop out. We have a 10 am train home booked in the morning."

"My apartment is only two tube stations from Paddington." Vicky's face lit up like a lighthouse.

Alex pulled out his phone to text his dad to find out where he was. His mind now changed up a gear. Was there a chance of him crashing at Vicky's? The excitement caused him to struggle with typing.

Alex's attraction to Vicky had gone beyond friendship to a carnal desire for this beautiful trans-woman. This desire overrode any existing male programming, not having a bias either way as to whatever delights Vicky held for him. His curiosity to know the extent of her transition could avoid any future embarrassment.

He realised that a blunt approach put at risk any opportunity to go further. He hoped that their previous friendship trumped any resistance. Before he knew it, his mouth gambled.

"So er, Vicky, the 64 million dollar question, is little Mike still down there?" nodding down to her crotch hidden under the table.

Vicky reeled back in her seat, gasping in shock, "You haven't changed, have you? It was always something I loved about you, no frills, bells or whistles, just open and blunt." Alex relaxed as she smiled forgiveness with one corner of her mouth and shook her head in mock disgust.

"Would it matter if he was?"

Alex's honesty broke through again, "Well, no, it doesn't matter. He isn't a meal deal breaker, but if we were to take this further later I wondered whether to expect him?"

Vicky's face changed to a poker face, "You think we may take things further later?"

Alex couldn't tell if she pleased with the prospect? Was he reading her right?

"I hope so. But this is all new to me." The enormity of Alex's admission caused his face to glow, and his heart thumped in his chest. Alex could not tell if that was the answer Vicky wished as well.

"It's complex. If it was anyone else asking, I wouldn't answer. But yes, little Mike is still down there."

Alex was now comfortable in the knowledge of being forewarned. Although like when a friend tells you about a new hidden tattoo, he now had a desire wash over him to see it and her body. Wondering what would look like? If he touched it, would it excite her as much as when he touched himself?

Vicky continued before he could think on it further.

"Before you ask your next obvious mastermind question, I'll answer it. Working whilst staying at my dads allowed me to save up and buy these," She nodded down to her chest. She sounded relieved to be telling Alex her innermost secrets.

"So those aren't falsies?" Alex blurted speaking before thinking.

"Haha, you are still a boy at heart. No ... Well, silicone implants. It has allowed me to live like Vicky more than anything else. Now I'm complete, more true to myself than at any other time in my life. They are my favourite part of me. What do you think?"

"Oh jeez, you're asking just to embarrass me?"

"Yes, and I'm enjoying the payback. But you haven't answered my question?"

"I like the way they are trying to burst out of your blouse!" Alex blurted out, trying to avoid the question. He blushed profusely at being put on the spot, although it allowed him the chance to glance back at her blouse to double-check.

"Good, as that was the look I was going for..." Vicky mocked, breathing deeply in to exaggerate her chest.

"They're perfect, not too big nor too small, they suit you. To be honest, you are stunning all over" Alex shocked himself with his admission.

Vicky's cheeks blushed deep red and gasped, "I like you saying pleasant things. Can you practice more?" She giggled.

"So what happened to your ginger hair?"

"Oh! I'm just having a blond makeover. As I needed cheering up. Which do you prefer, ginger or blond?"

"Now you're just fishing for compliments."

"Yes, it's a girl's prerogative."

"They are both so different. I only ever knew you with short, curly, ginger hair. So it isn't a fair comparison."

"Do you like it?"

"I love it, especially the subtle electric purple highlights, although it is the backbone of your secret disguise."

"I'm glad you like it. Not everyone notices the highlights." She squeezed his hand tighter.

"Although as secret disguises go, it counts as cheating, though."

"Haha. Don't worry, I can always return to ginger in the future."

Alex realised another clue hidden by her secret disguise, "You used to have freckles on your cheeks and nose?"

"Haha, you noticed?" She subconsciously rubbed the bridge of her nose with a finger.

"Er, yeah." He gulped, hoping that freckles couldn't be removed, so he wouldn't look an idiot.

"They don't fit in with my current blond moment and being winter it doesn't take much makeup to blend them out." She looked pleased to receive another compliment.

Alex's phone received a text and buzzed, "Dad's in the ski jump bar. Do you know where that is?"

"Yes, it's outside the entrance." They released hands, and Alex extracted himself from the confines of the vintage gondola.

"Come on then Vicky, let's put plan 'B' into motion." Helping her out of her seat, he was disappointed to watch her knees disappear. He helped her with her coat and slipped on his coat and backpack.

Once again they wrapped their arms around each other, although this time it wasn't an act to convince some creeps. The crowds had gone, allowing them to saunter out through the main entrance to the bar.

As they walked in towards Alex's dad and his friends, eight heads turned and eight pairs of eyes widened to dinner plates and his dad's jaw hit the floor. You could see they all wanted to be the one to ask the obvious question.

"Hi Alex, Brian never said you were with a friend?" Mandy, one of his dad's ski buddies, asked first.

"Hi everyone, this is Vicky. We were at sixth form together. She was working on one of the stands."

Everyone introduced themselves, and Alex's dad got his jaw off the floor. His dad's male friends gave Alex the usual nods and winks of approval, boosting his ego at having the best eye-candy in the busy bar.

"I promised to take her out tonight. So if you don't mind, I'll give the meal tonight a miss. Although is it still okay for me to crash at yours tonight, Keith?" Alex asked his host for the night.

"Hey, who am I to get between you and a beautiful girl? I'll text you our apartment address and warn security." Keith replied.

"You realise it is Valentines and every table in London is booked? If all else fails, you can join us, Vicky. I'm sure we can stretch to another mouth to feed with the takeout." Kat, Keith's wife added.

Vicky chimed in, "No, it is okay thanks I've been able to book us in at somewhere local to me. I'm 2 tube stops from Paddington, so it isn't far." She exuded confidence as she was back in saleswoman mode.

Vicky got sucked into a conversation with dad's female ski buddies, all keen to learn some gossip about them. Alex's dad sidled over and whispered, "Look, if you get lucky, meet me at Paddington before our 10 am train."

"Yes, no worries, Dad."

Vicky returned to Alex and asked, "They've invited us to stay for a drink but I'm tired as it has been a long day on my feet. If you want to stay, then I'm okay for a drink." Alex could see her tired eyes with her long day catching up with her and if they stayed Alex knew it would be more than just one drink.

"It's okay, no worries, we can go." Alex released Vicky of her concerns.

"Alex, it's been a long day of sipping water and after that bucket of coffee I need the loo, I'll see you in a minute." She pecked a kiss on his cheek and walked across the bar to the toilets.

As soon as Vicky was out of hearing, Adrian, the self-appointed joker of the group piped up "Alex, hard decision isn't it? Gents or the Ladies for a lady-boy?"

He held a hand up, wiggling his little finger. Thankfully, the others had drifted out of earshot to the bar, engaged in a long joke as they brought the next round of drinks. Alex's blood boiled with memories of the sixth form, walking over to tower over him, his blood rising with his fists clenching.

"Is that supposed to be funny, Ade? So I bring a friend and you jump to conclusions? Why?" It angered Alex that a respected friend of his dad could be so ignorant. Adrian blushed profusely, stepping back, never having experienced Alex's aggressive stance before.

Before things deteriorated, Mandy, who had overheard, stepped between them to tear into Adrian in Vicky's defence. Alex knew she worked in social services and was a politically correct, strong-willed woman. Her voice was quiet while admonishing Adrian as he shrank back further, apologetic.

"Alex, sorry, mate. I only meant it as a joke, and it wasn't funny. She is stunning, and it's great to see you happy. I hope you don't mind?" He apologised sheepishly and turned to join the others at the bar.

"It's okay, thanks." Alex's blood now simmered down from boiling.

Mandy turned and gave Alex a polite motherly hug, "Sorry, I hope you don't mind me fighting your battle? Ignore Adrian, it was just a bigoted joke. You both look happy. She looks gorgeous. Don't worry, I won't say anything." Revealing to Alex that she had realised Vicky's secret!

"Thanks, Mandy, it's a long story, please don't tell Dad? Thanks."

"No, mum's the word."

Vicky appeared from the toilets and Alex wasn't the only person in the bar to enjoy her athletic profile as she returned with a confident stride.

"Alex, what would you and Vicky like to drink?" His dad called from the bar with his new round of drinks already building up at the bar.

"Sorry, Dad, we need to make a move. It's been a long day for Vicky. Her feet are killing her from being in heels all day. Plus, the table is an early booking. Whatever you decide for the next ski trip, I'm happy to go with."

Everyone said their goodbyes, the couple turned to leave. It felt natural for both their arms to drop back around their waists again, with Vicky's hips swaying as she walked. Eight pairs of eyes burned into their backs as they left. Alex heard his dad gasp and cough in a spasm, having let his drink go down the wrong way.

Vicky guided them to the nearest tube station, "Thanks, it would have been nice to have stayed for a drink, but I'm famished. It has been a long day on my feet."

The short ride on the tube allowed Alex to soak up Vicky's scent as she leant on his shoulder. They soon arrived and headed on up the escalators. Emerging above ground, Alex's phone announced two texts as it received a signal.