All Comments on 'Vox Dominus Pt. 04'

Very very well done

Love this story; I can’t wait to see where it goes from here.

The only bad thing about this story, is having to wait for the next chapter.

Still going great. Really wished for a little more though. This story has so much potential. Please don't make us wait too long next time.

Good, but far too short. This is one of my biggest pet peeves with stories that aren't submitted in full because it's like a commercial break every ten minutes in a show... except you have to wait a week or month for the break to end. It really busts up the immersion into the story.

Great writing! Cant wait for more...

F#@k but this is hot. Please continue....

Typo: Vox should be voice in C.'s " —even without the Vox, even in complete silence, Master somehow always kept her off-balance." ; she doesn't know the term yet.

I really like the pace you're taking, building characters and letting the story unfold. I just hope you'll be able to write it to the end. I've seen way too much author abandoning promising stories.

I'm loving this story so far and agree with everyone else hoping for another chapter soon!

I just wanted to take a moment to compliment two specific elements of your writing; (1), your use of off-stage characters to add tension is well done, (Chelsea's distraction from Mom's pending call heightening her anxiety in maintaining her 'Jaeger family' status expectations or Seb's call from his ex during the bedroom scene pulling him away from his darker desires, etc) (2) You've made interesting use of the omniscient narration. First it's in only one character's head, while the other character's decisions & dialogue are made to seem unrealistic. Then, you go back in time a minute or two and the narrator is in the other character's head, explaining and fully justifying those decisions and statements. It's an unusual approach that lends itself to awkwardness, but you've pulled it off and shown it's well suited to this genre. Kudos.

I'm having a great time so far, but I have one reservation. Please don't reduce Chelsea's intellect or eliminate her free will. Her inner conflict and willing choice to submit is an important part of what makes this story so hot.

I hate having to give this 5 stars because it's competing with me, ;-) but it totally deserves it. Great character development. Good use of mystery with Sophia. Compelling struggle of the psyches of both main characters.

Keep it coming!

The hottest thing about this story is the characterization. It's your story, but please don't fall into the pit trap of turning well made characters into uninteresting, one-dimensional bimbos. So many MC stories end or are forced to end too soon because of it.

Aside from that, I'm absolutely loving the tension and pay-off you build up. Can't wait for more installments.

Enjoyed it, like the others I hope you write more.

Thanks for sharing this one

Consensual mind control, it doesn’t get any better than that.

Tess (UK)

Love the buildup over time that gives up the perspectives of Sep and Chelsea as they start to come to some kind of agreement. I like the way that you are giving Chelsea some inner conflict with herself. Is she really a submissive looking for a master? What is Sep really experiencing? Where did he get the "VOX" idea? THat Sep does not want to get Sophia involved means that he is looking for ways to control his inner voice. Please do not make this into a story where Chelsea is turned into a sex-crazed bimbo girl but will still give her a personality that will assert itself so she does not fall into that path that so many other MC stories do.

Histoire incroyable elle est incroyablement en accord avec mes fantasme j'ai trop hâte de la suite et qu'elle dure au moin 25 chapitre

these stories are ok but so drawn out and slow supposed to be sex stories but aint much of that per installment

This is pagiarism.

Why are you copying the story? Write something yourself :)

Why are you copying the story? Write something yourself :)

It seems Chelsea wants to be his submissive but hopefully her will doesn't totally erode and she ends up a mindless slave. It would also be sweet if she's a virgin for him to claim. I mean she doesn't seem to behave like a slut or even interact with guys much; she cuts them all down by the sounds of things. So here's hoping for that sweet treasure.

Good stuff.