Waiting to Inhale

As I stood and started to walk out, I heard Quinn behind me saying, "Wait, I need to give you money." I smiled. Thank God. I thought inwardly. I couldn't wait to get that check. I had been fantasizing about depositing it in my bank account and going to the grocery store directly after the gig to get whatever I wanted. I was so tired of pasta, canned food and whatever crap that was lying around the break room when I went to work at Music Warehouse.

It was the poorest I had ever been in my entire life, what with having broken up with my boyfriend 6 months prior. Yeah, I could have asked my parents for money, and they would have given it, but not without strings attached. They would have been mad at me for breaking up with Jason, told me to work harder, and berated me for not saving more back in December when students were flowing like honey.

Quinn came back a moment later with a big smile on her face. "Thank you so much." she said, handing me an envelope. When I reached for it, she put her hand on top of mine and said "I really can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to our lessons. You did an amazing job. I put a little extra money in there for a tip." she said and winked. I sort of got the feeling she wanted to kiss me, but didn't. Instead she gave me a hug, and I could smell the cigarette smoke clinging to her.

"Oh. Well. Thank you." I told her, and placed the envelope in my bag. I just kind of stood there awkwardly for a few seconds, then began the walk out to my car smiling as a few people told me how much they enjoyed my playing.

When I got to my car, I counted the money. Quinn had given me cash (which was great for tax reasons) and I counted 6 hundred dollar bills. She had tipped me 100 dollars over what I was expecting, and I actually put my hand over my mouth in disbelief, so happy she had paid me and thought to tip.

By the time I got close to a grocery store midway between Quinn's house and mine, it was 10:45. It looked like it closed at 11,and was one of those super overpriced stores with organic everything, but I didn't care. I wanted to celebrate after having to tighten my belt for the last several weeks. I rushed in and got ice cream, apples and a carton of cigarettes, which cost a grand total of 65 dollars. Tomorrow I would go somewhere less expensive and stock up on more healthy items, but for now, I was celebrating. I was so excited to have a little extra money to pay my bills and get groceries.

When I got home a half hour or so later, I immediately sat out on my porch, smoked two fresh cigarettes, put the open pack in my purse and the rest in the freezer, then ate half a pint of ice cream while watching my favorite TV show.. Then, because I felt guilty, I had an apple and went to sleep, very glad I had played the gig and had gotten that 600 dollars.

.........................................................................

By the time Tuesday rolled around, I felt a little awkward about going back to Quinn's house. Mostly because we had been staring at each other the entire time I had been playing piano the Saturday before. Well, maybe she was just drunk or something. Or, maybe she just really appreciated people who could play piano. Or, maybe everybody at the party thought she was staring at them and she was just magnetic that way.

Well, at any rate, I certainly wanted the extra hundred dollars she would pay me for going out there and teaching a lesson. Students would start trickling back in August, but I never really got my numbers up until September, and I needed all the extra money I could get.

"Hi!" I said, after I parked and she opened the door. This time she was wearing jeans and a fairly tight fitting t-shirt with sandals on. Her toes were painted, and her hair was flowing and done similarly to how she had it at the party. I remember thinking the words "devil may care hair."

"It's so good to see you again." She said, going in for a hug. There wasn't a hint of cigarette smoke. Was she hitting on me? I couldn't tell. She was certainly very friendly. I must have tensed up at the contact because the next thing I knew she was saying "I'm so sorry." she said, "I just...you are so talented. Thanks so much for coming all the way out here."

"Oh no problem." I said, as nicely as I could, and let her lead the way back to the piano I had come to know better than she did at the time. I still didn't smell anything other than perfume.

I brought a few lesson books for her to take a look at, and we worked through the basics. She already knew a few chords, but we went back to the beginning, and she was soon able to find all the notes on the keyboard, and I winced at her mid length fingernails on the keys.

"They are too long, right?" she said, noticing the clacking. "I probably need to cut them." she said apologetically. She clearly hadn't thought about it before I got there.

"Well, it makes things easier if you do." I said, not knowing how strongly she felt about her nails. I certainly didn't want her to quit over it, that was for sure. If she was paying me 100 dollars a lesson and wanted to play piano with long nails, I would let her. Besides, I didn't expect her to last as a student anyway. I thought I would be lucky to get 400 dollars from her before she quit since adults seemed to let life get in the way a lot of the time.

"Oh, I'll cut them. I want to do this right." she said, and then took my hand and examined my nails. I hoped she didn't notice the nicotine stain on my fingers. "I bet you've kept yours short all your life."

I felt a jolt go through me at the contact that led straight to my clit, and let her hold my hand for a moment savoring the sensation, then said "You're right about that. I don't think I have ever had long nails." I said, thinking about it. I really hadn't, given the fact that I had played since I was 7. "I used to paint them sometimes." I told her, thinking how I had for my college teacher, hoping to get his attention.

The next week, she had her nails cut, and she had done everything I asked her to do in the way of practice.

The weeks went by, and each time I saw her she found an excuse to touch me. I also found that sometimes I smelled cigarette smoke, and sometimes there wasn't a hint of it. She also seemed to be taking more care of her appearance. She was super attractive and in shape when I met her, but it was as though she was always trying to top her look from week to week. She also seemed to practice quite a lot, never canceled, and was making an astounding amount of progress. In fact, she was well on her way to playing a simplified version of Moonlight Sonata.

Additionally, bit by bit I learned about her personal life, and I found her interesting to talk to, I struggled to end her lesson on time, once even going almost an hour over and having to cancel the next lesson at my apartment. She told me about how she had been married in her early 20's, but was now 45 and divorced to a Hollywood director. She had worked as a model, but never made it big and didn't do it for very long, and now she was the owner of a business that acquired and sold high end art. I found out she was a little more liberal than I was, but I respected her views, and was impressed when she told me her ex husband had won an Oscar for his work on a major Hollywood film.

When I asked her why she got divorced, she weighed her words carefully and said "we grew apart. I'm not sure what happened. I was getting older, and I suppose I wanted to branch out more. To experience things with other people."

Every week, I realized I was falling for her more and more. In fact, as a result of her praise, I got more confident in myself and started taking more gigs. She built me up, and instead of saying no to things, I was saying yes, and making much more money than I would have being a teacher alone.

I also caught myself dressing up for her. I would wear certain colors because she said she liked them on me. Thinking back to our first meeting, I had worn tattered jeans and a black shirt, but then I started paying a lot more attention to the fit of my clothing. I bought new outfits (as the money started rolling in) and had my hair cut and styled, and I even bought makeup to enhance my eyes and lips. By the time November rolled around, I was sure we both had a massive crush on each other, but I think neither of us was really wanting to admit it to the other.

Then after one lesson, after a soulful hug at the door, I went to my car, turned over the ignition, and nothing happened. My car was dead. I knew it was bound to happen sooner or later. I knew it was high time I got a new one, but I couldn't afford it. Now I'd have to call a tow truck, get the car patched up and who the hell knew how much that would cost. All the savings I had, gone. Fuck.

I quickly dialed the closest tow truck company.

"Yeah, hi. My car won't start." I said, feeling like I was going to cry.

"Where you at?" a gruff sounding voice on the other end of the line said, and I gave him the address.

"You're pretty far out." he said. "I can get one of my guys out there in about 2-3 hours." he said, and I shuttered. I didn't have any choice but to say ok. I then called the rest of my students I had lined up for the day and canceled them all (which sucked, because it meant I would need to refund around 150 dollars).

I was super frustrated. I would have to sit in Quinn's driveway until the tow truck got there. I hadn't charged my phone (stupid me) and needed to conserve what battery power I had in case the tow people called, so I supposed I could read the owner's manual for the car while I waited. Fuck.

Quinn appeared in the front doorway of her house, then walked over to the drivers side window of my car. "Everything alright?" she asked.

I felt like screaming. I wanted a cigarette, but wasn't going to let anybody, let alone Quinn, know about my addiction, especially when I wasn't sure if she was a smoker or not. I was sure she had already figured out I was poor compared to her. "I'm fine." I said with false calm. "My car doesn't want to cooperate with me today." I tried to smile, but failed.

"Oh." she said. "Did you call someone?" she asked.

"A tow truck is coming." I said, trying to act like I wasn't as stressed out as I was.

"You poor thing." she said. She looked so beautiful. I wished I was half as gorgeous. I wasn't ugly, but I didn't have a perfect nose, wide green eyes and long graceful limbs like she did. I was the type of girl who thought about things too much and probably spent too much time alone. "Come inside. We can chat and have coffee while you're waiting." she said and smiled.

"It sounds like it will be a long time." I said. "Two or three hours." I told her.

"It will be fun. It will give us a chance to talk." she said. Once out of the car, she grabbed my arm and led me inside.

She sat me down in the living room and got me a cup of coffee. I started sipping on it. I really wished I had a cigarette, but the coffee would have to do.

"I thought maybe you had a boyfriend who might come out." she said, and cocked her head. I realized then that she had no idea if I was single or not. I was trying so hard not to get ensnared with her (because I knew the moment I did, the money would stop), so I hadn't told her anything about my personal life. Nothing other than stories about my college days as it pertained to my playing.

"No boyfriend for me." I said, trying to look regretful, but she smiled.

I guess I was stressed out. I really wanted a cigarette, was worried about how I would pay for the car, and I was second guessing all my life choices, even though things had been looking up lately, so I told her everything. Mostly about my ex, Jason who I had lived with for nearly two years before he broke up with me. "I guess it was never meant to be. I never was really that into him, though. He was just convenient." I told her.

"Do you think maybe you aren't attracted to men?" She asked innocently.

"I don't know." I told her in the smallest voice possible. I knew that wasn't true. I was attracted to the right kind of man. I had certainly been into my college professor, Kamaal, but she had made me so curious about women, and maybe I should just let go and give into my desires. We clearly wanted each other.

I don't know who made the first move. It might have been me, but before I knew it, her lips were on mine. My heart rate doubled, and I felt my pussy tingling, hard.

When the kiss broke, she said. "Oh my God, I've wanted to do that for so long." she said and blushed, "How did that feel?" she whispered, and looked at me, almost like a mother making sure her child was ok.

"I liked it." I told her, feeling awkward.

"Well, maybe we should take it into the bedroom?" she asked. I must have been blushing to my toes, but I nodded my head. Besides, it had been so long since I'd felt the touch of anyone besides my cat Figaro, and I was starved for human contact.

When I saw her bedroom for the first time, I was amazed by how spacious it was. She had an alpaca rug on the floor, and the bed, though a California king, was in a room so large it made the bed look tiny.

"Here it is." She said, and turned towards me and kissed me again. "I think you're so pretty." she said, "So innocent." she said and pushed a lock of my blonde hair out of the way, looking deeply into my eyes. "Come," she encouraged, and before I knew it, I was on the bed, kissing Quinn on her massive bed and enjoying the feel of her body against mine. I reached up and touched her breasts, which was such a thrill for me. This time, I wasn't drunk at a bar, and could really take my time, enjoying her body, and letting her enjoy mine.

Somehow, my shirt was off before I knew it, and we were putting our nipples together. "Oh my God," she said, but I was too turned on to say anything. My head was rushing with adrenaline and excitement. My nipple was actually touching hers. Her perfect breast, which I was simultaneously awed and turned on by.

A few moments later, I felt a burning need to suck her nipples, so I boldly aligned myself with her perfect, perfect tits, and licked them. I loved listening to moan, and somehow the act of sucking them was so naughty that I almost thought I would come from the simple act of doing it. Something about her scent, mixed with the act of doing it and having her enjoy it turned me on.

The next few moments was sort of a blur, and then somehow her head was between my legs. She went down on me and it was better than I imagined.

I had shaved my pussy bare out of habit, and was very glad I had done it this morning in the shower, glad that it was smooth for her lips to taste.

"You taste so good." she said, and I moaned. All I could think was that I loved having my pussy licked. Loved it. And having a woman do it was even more intoxicating because she knew what it felt like, whereas none of the men had any idea what to do.

She started by teasing me with her tongue, just barely touching my clit before pulling away, and then with her fingers touching all around my mound. Everywhere but my clit, making me crazy with anticipation. Just when I thought I would go crazy, she started nibbling at my most sensitive part, causing a wave of pleasure to course through me before pulling away. After several cycles of this, I was so ready to cum, though she seemed to enjoy prolonging my pleasure.

Finally, after about 10 minutes, I started circling my hips in rhythm as she sucked on my clit and moved her fingers in and out of me. She found my G spot, and started to move her fingers in and out, causing my desire to build higher and higher.

After bringing me to a fever pitch, I came hard while she was sucking my clit and putting her fingers inside of me.

After I had a mind bending orgasm where I lost all sense of reality for a split second, I sort of regained consciousness and realized I was on her massive bed in the middle of a room twice the size of my entire apartment and felt completely deflated.

"Oh fuck, that was amazing." I told her, not really able to say anything else. I guessed she probably wanted me to return the favor, but I couldn't move, and sort of wanted to savor the endorphins going through me.

"I'm sorry, I..." I said, trailing off, realizing I didn't really have anything to say.

"It's ok." she said, kissing me on the lips. I tasted myself on her lips.

"Do you want me to?" I asked.

She just flopped down beside me and drunk me in with those green eyes of hers. "It's ok." she said in a motherly way. "You tasted amazing."

I was relieved. Not that I didn't want to make her happy. I did, but in such a relaxed state, I didn't want to have to do anything, let alone try and fail to make her cum. I had no idea how to please a woman, let alone someone as cool as she was.

"That was incredible" I said, looking back at her. I still wasn't sure how I felt. I knew I was overwhelmed. Not just because she was a woman, but because she was a woman with so much money and beauty and she had her own company. I felt awkward by comparison, and though I knew she admired me, I wondered how she would feel if she knew I would be lucky to make 50K a year this year (which is basically the poverty level in California).

"Do you want a cigarette?" she asked, pulling a beautiful golden cigarette case out of her nightstand. From the looks of it, they were 120's.

I was nervous, but I wanted one.

"I don't usually smoke, but sometimes I do after sex, or when I'm drinking." she told me. I nodded, took one, and we both lit up. I felt the nicotine hit, and slid into a deeper relaxation than I had felt in a long time.

"Looks like you were hurting for one." she said and smiled, and took a drag of her own stick.

"I'm trying to quit." I told her. "I do smoke 3 or 4 cigarettes a day though." I told her. It was the first time I had been truthful about it with anyone. Whenever I had a boyfriend, I would try to quit, but would always sneak behind his back when I couldn't manage it. I'd usually get caught and yelled at. My parents didn't know either, and I would never in a billion years smoke in front of a student.

"I thought maybe you did. I could tell." she said, smiling. "It can be sexy, you know. I love smoking during sex."

We talked for a while, and I really opened up to her. I told her about how I didn't really have a love life, and after the last break up, I had lost my friends because they had all been his friends. How much I felt like she helped me, encouraging me to perform. I liked teaching and my students, but had wanted something more, and she had helped me.

"You are a great pianist." she said, continuing to flatter and inspire me. "And you're a great teacher." she said. "You definitely taught me how to play really well." I didn't tell her I thought she was motivated by sex, but I refrained from telling her that.

After a while, she told me it was her turn to get off, and I winced thinking I would have to stumble around trying to lick her pussy when I had no idea what I was doing, but instead, she told me she wanted to try something with cigarettes.

"What did you have in mind?" I asked.

"Why don't you lay here and we'll split a cigarette while I masturbate on your lap. You can light up, and tease me with it, letting me have a few drags while I get off."

I sort of tingled at the thought. Having such a light smoking habit, just the simple act of smoking inside was gratifying enough, but smoking during sex was a whole new level.

She lay with her head on my stomach, and I felt her back on my naked pussy while she started making small circles around her clit with her hand. It turned me on to see those perfect breasts jiggle.

First I arranged the ash tray for easy access on my right side, and then lit up one of her cigarettes that had been encased in a beautiful gold case.