What Am I Give?

Note to the reader: There isn't really any sex in this one. However, there are numerous attempts at humor and tongue-in-cheek looks at the world of BDSM. Also the author attempted to capture the thought and feelings of a submissive undertaking a very bold but fictional action. I trust you enjoy.

Sunshine checked herself in the mirror one last time. Wearing only a leather body harness and an ankle chain with bells that tinkled at each step, she gave herself a final appraisal.

She wore her blonde hair cut short and it was soft and silky. Her blue eyes sparkled and her make up was perfect. Pussy freshly waxed with only a thin strip of hair. A thick black leather O- ring collar tightly affixed to her neck was perfectly centered. Also dangling from her neck was placard with the number 20.

She was as prepared physically as she was ever going to be. Emotionally she wasn't so sure. The fantasy was about to meet the reality. Sunshine's rollercoaster of fear began its journey again.

The Lady Sara had insinuated Sunshine would make the perfect girl for intense pony play. Please, she thought, not Lady Sara. She didn't want to spend a night in a horse stall—with a horse, only to be saddled up at dawn for a morning romp. She didn't want to be put on a halter and be made to perform and compete in an ad hoc sub pony show. Now the trip to the breeding chute if she didn't win the pony show sounded interesting. Nah, Sunshine thought she might take the sadists over Lady Sara.

Wait. Scratch that. Not the sadists.

Sunshine knew the true sadists who would struggle to stay within the boundaries of her limits, all the while seeking to push it as far as they could go. Pain, intense pain, would happen. She knew at least three who wouldn't mark her, but were true Masters of inflicting suffering and would push to her threshold. She knew others who were Masters of the psychological sadism game who would put her in a cage in the dark and leave her for hours while they played with their pain slut. She pictured herself in a cage, in the dark, listening to the thuds and cracks as another girl cried and screamed while being told to get ready as she was next. What if they won her? They knew Sunshine was strong and trying to break her without marking her would be their fun. How much could she take? How much would she take?

She knew these people. Most of what they wanted scared her because she knew it would test her. For Sunshine, fear (but not terror) released endorphins. She could ride the high of fear.

Maybe someone who would appreciate her service submission would claim her. Massages, shining shoes, soft, gentle candlelit baths! Even doing laundry and washing cars. They could bid, too! It could be sweet and rewarding! She felt the fear, sought the solace, and the ride was delicious.

The local BDSM dungeon had organized the auction. A real, open out cry, highest bidder wins auction. The proceeds went to charity, the local wounded veterans project, which was selected by the participating submissives. What started as an interesting kinky idea had caught fire within the community. While numerous girls had enthusiasticaly signed up to be auctioned off, it was clear demand was going to outstrip supply. Sunshine had spent months on the planning committee but she didn't want a supervisory role. She was putting herself up for auction.

The rules were simple enough. Each submissive's limits would be clearly stated in advance of the auction. Bidder's agreed to strictly respect limits. Winning bidders received their girl's submission for a fixed period extending from the moment they won Friday evening until exactly 5 pm the following Sunday. A huge party was planned at the Dungeon Saturday night so the newly matched Doms and subs could have a chance to scene or just simply show off.

Like most BDSM communities, this one was pretty close knit. Everybody pretty much knew everyone else, some better than others. There was certainly the element of the unknown. All Sunshine new for sure was her Dom, Mr. G, had said He would not bid on her. It sounded like a cold shot, but He knew Sunshine wanted the experience of really being sold off as property. Knowing He was there with top dollar made it more like play and less like—taking a genuine albeit controlled risk. Besides, He trusted her enough to know she would certainly use her safe word and keep herself protected; after all, He had trained her. He also knew she could take care of herself. He also knew she liked to test herself.

He also thought maybe a little taste of something different would send her home with a renewed sense of just how good she really had it. Come back with an even finer point of understanding just how good a Dom He really was. She might come back even needing something like—solace and recuperation. It would deepen her bond to Him. However, He didn't like the price she would have to pay for that.

He also understood Sunshine's love of the fear rollercoaster. He'd play. "You do this, Sunshine, and you are own your own. I think it is wonderful you want to raise money for the wounded vets. I won't be there to save you. You will be outside of My cloak. Pain and suffering might not be avoided. You might pay dearly for this, but I grant you permission. Just know that if you go off My leash I cannot rein you in from a very dark experience."

Friday night started at 9pm with a closed event "meet and greet" where the buyers and the auction goods could mingle and chat. The bidding started at midnight. The meet and greet was a different experience than Sunshine expected.

The best analogy she could draw was a prized show horse being evaluated. Doms and Dommes asked her direct, personal questions. What are your limits? Are you a pain slut? Enjoy Daddy Dom/lg play? You a brat? Rope bunny? You good with playing with Me and my sissy sub cuckold boi? Like suspension play? Is your ass available? Can you be a good girl for Mommy? Have a gang bang fantasy? Golden shower? Golden showers from Me and my boyz? Can you roleplay mock execution for My coven? Can you switch and Dom my girl with a strap on while I Dom you? Electro play cool? Can you do ob/gyn exam role play? Can you wear a diaper and suck on a pacifier? Can you wear an animal mask and costume? What is the largest size dildo you have ever tried? The list seemed endless. She was starting to feel a little vanilla. What brought up fear again were the things she was saying maybe to.

They asked very politely and specifically before touching her, knowing she must first consent to physical contact. They held her ample breasts in their hands and weighed her heft like melons. They stroked her nipples. They rubbed her pubic hair between fingers and gently but briefly ran fingers up and down the length of her pussy. They rubbed their hands across her ass. They asked her to open her mouth and put her tongue out. They asked her to bend over and grab her ankles.

It was group objectification. She was indeed being treated like potential property. Sunshine had little tell tale sign in that she giggled and laughed when very nervous or when she climaxed. The giggling and laughing she couldn't control and it took serious self-control to push back numerous orgasms as she was appraised. Near the end she couldn't hold back. She tried to hide it. Trembling, bucking and softly giggling she climaxed and her fluids dripped out of her and puddled onto the floor. Sunshine was mortified but the applause and cheers were deafening.

She also spied Mr. G in the crowd and watched him inspecting some of the goods being offered. She was curious what He might choose, if He decided to choose at all. She smiled thinking it would be, at best, a mediocre substitute for Him.

Sunshine stood backstage with the other chattel and listened to the auctioneer as he sold off the submissives. "Twenty five, twenty fine. Am I given three thousand? Three thousand there! Thirty five...thirty five there! Am I give four? Four? Give me four for the redhead. Give me four for the lg redhead. Give me four for the lg redhead who wants to bring her stuffie... " Another thing Sunshine didn't expect was the range of prices. She realized she should have, but she figured each sub would go for about the same amount, give or take. This wasn't the case. Some girls went for significantly more than others. And looks and age seemed to have no bearing on the prices. While no sub received an insulting bid, it was clear there was a hierarchy of value at work.

Sunshine had no idea where she ranked.

A new fear came to play. What if she wasn't worth much? What if there were few bidders for her and she went cheap? What if her bright, shining moment fizzled into a few seconds of half hearted offers? She was a good sub and she knew it. What if her worth, her value, wasn't recognized? Or how would she cope if her true value fell short of her expectations of herself? Yes, she was very emotionally resilient. but the fear of being perceived as not high quality or high tier gripped her. How would Mr. G view her afterwards if he thought she only received mercy bids?

Lady Tara, the Domme in charge of presenting the auction subs, called for Sunshine. "You are next, little one. Ready? You good? You really want to do this, sweetie? You can change your mind anytime and it is ok. I will get you out of this if you just say the word." Sunshine said she was good and tried to calm herself. She actually felt like an object. She was actually a piece of property up for bid. She was now just an object to be evaluated, a worth set, and then utilized. And she had as much say so over who utilized her as a piece of farm equipment.

Lady Tara attached a leash to Sunshine's collar and placed a blindfold over her eyes. She wouldn't be allowed to see who was bidding on her, and would only know who won her when she was claimed. She felt the tug of the leash and was walked out to the stage to the sound of applause that drowned out the delicate tinkling of her ankle chain.

"Now I offer you number 20. Sunshine! This slutty little blonde is an experienced submissive on loan to us from Mr. G, so you know she was trained right. She is a service submissive who is also a trained massage therapist. She loves the impact play! Most of you know Sunshine. Let's go back over her limits; no permanent markings, no knife/needle/blood/fire play. No breath or asphyxiation play. The standard big no on the potty games, kids, and animals. Don't break the skin. Send her home pretty much like you found her. Mr. G says no sharing. You know the drill; discuss her limits beforehand, and honor the safe word.

"What am I give? What am I give for Sunshine? What is she worth to you?"

She was blind, naked, and being auctioned off. Sunshine never felt as vulnerable as she did right then. She felt a crop gently tapping between her thighs as Lady Tara told her to spread her legs shoulder length apart, get her hands behind her head, and keep her back straight and thrust her big pretty tits way out. A moment's hesitation by Sunshine and she felt a small bite of the crop on her shapely ass. Sunshine assumed the inspection position and held it.

"One thousand. I see one thousand...gimme 15, gimme me 15...there is 15... Now please! Oral service from her alone is worth two. Two! Someone wants a blowjob!...now three...give me 35, 35 for her experience..give me 35...now four...now 45...looking for 45...look at those tits! Give me 45...those tits alone are worth 45...you felt 'em..

"I got 45...now five. Five for this good little slut...look at that little landing strip of a pussy...you know it's good...give me 5...looking for...I see five...5 knows good pussy when he see it...55? I need 55...now six...I see six...I see...what Sir? I see 65...."

Sunshine was focusing on holding position and didn't realize she was also holding her breath. She breathed deeply in relief to hear the numbers going higher in rapid order. Becky, the stunning, ever popular pain slut Latina, had gone for $7000—the highest of the evening so far. If it stopped now she felt like fair value had been reached.

"65...give me 7. Give me 7. Give me 7 for her...yours for 7...yours for 6750...where is 6750...Sirs and Ma'am's, look at her! Just look how she is holding position for you. I've been told Mr. G hasn't spanked her in a week. Not a mark on her! You know that fine porcelain ass is going to glow a beautiful shade of red...Tara, would you please spin her around and let them see that prime ass? ...now 6750, thank you, now 7...now 7...now 7500...I see 75. Looking for 8. Looking for eight thousand dollars.

What am I give? What am I give for number 20? She will crawl. She will beg. She will even do your laundry! What am I give? I need 8."

Sunshine has crossed the threshold. She as was now the highest priced item of the night.

"Come on now! This is for charity. Let's dig deep and help the wounded vets project...Sunshine will reward your generosity. Let's give 8. Give me 8...let's show Mr. G what His work is worth...give me...yes, 8!!! Eight for tribute to Mr. G..now 85, I need 85....I need 85 for our wounded vets...85 and you take her home...8 going once, 8 going...yes Sir! Thank you! Now I see 9...now I see 95....95...95...any other bidders? Who wants her? Who wants her? Any other takers? She is the last blonde of the night...We are out of stock on blondes after this...what am I give? 95 going once, 95 going twice...SOLD! Sold for Nine thousand five hundred dollars American! Thank you."

Thunderous applause erupted from the crowded, accompanied by shouts and cheers. Lady Tara told her to give them a proper curtsey. She did so with genuine appreciation and humility. Not many girls left and she had the highest bid of the night by $2500. It suddenly hit her; that meant some were holding back and waiting to bid on her. She was the prize of the evening in a crowd of very worthy prizes. She already felt a deep need to submit to...it didn't matter who. Not for the next few hours.

"I'm not where I belong, but I'm going to belong." she chuckled to herself.

Lady Tara removed the blindfold and handed the leash to the sub in charge of moving the items from the auction block to the winner's table. "Holy Shit, Sunshine! Nice!," said suzie as she walked her over. Sunshine smiled as smatterings of applause and shout outs continued to rain down.

The rules now were simple enough. The winning bidder came to the table, wrote a check payable to the wounded vets project, and claimed their property. The winner was responsible for delivering the sub to any location of the sub's choosing no later than 5 pm on Sunday. Until then, they owned them.

Her eyes were still adjusting when she heard the girl working the table say "You need your own leash if you want to use one. We need that one back." Sunshine steeled herself. She drew on all her considerable courage and strength to meet her fate. No, Mr. G wasn't here to save her and a sense of longing crashed over her. Eyes closed, bracing to meet perhaps the worst fate of all, an unknown sadist. Before Sunshine turned to see who bought her she vowed to herself, whatever she must endure, she would serve as best she could for as long as she could.

She looked down on the unsure little thing at the table. Dressed in little pink princess slippers, florescent rainbow thigh high socks, a big pink bow in her hair and an oversized t-shirt that read "I Fucked Your Daddy" was an elfin young woman sporting a bright pink collar with a heart. She probably stood 4'8. "Ok. Number 20. Here you go. Have fun." said the girl at the table as she took the check. Little Miss I Fucked Your Daddy turned to look at Sunshine with a look of complete uncertainty. "Uhhhh..hi! I'm pixie. I kinda won you. Kinda."

Total, abject deflation ensued.

Now it was Sunshine's turn to look uncertain. Kinda? A little girl sub had just spent $9500 on her and she says she kinda won her? "Yeah, I know," said pixie "it's complicated."

"Yes..uhhh..Ma'am? Mommy? Ms?" said a befuddled Sunshine.

That caused pixie to blush furiously. "Oh no! I'm not a Ma'am! I am not a Mommy. I'm the other way," stammered pixie. " I was sent to, well, get you. I mean, I won you kinda. Like I said...fuck this is hard." Pixie closed her eyes and took a very deep breath. She looked up to Sunshine and said "Look. Just be quiet and come with me. Be a good girl and don't give me any trouble...ok? Please? I mean, I mean look bitch," and pixie ran out of words. "Sorry. Sorry. Wait. No...Look bitch, let's get those tits moving and follow me. Well, ummmm...you have very nice tits. I wish I had bigger tits like yours...shit,...uhhhhh...come on. You slut."

Pixie turned and began walking into the crowd. She got about five steps before she said "Wait!." Sunshine stopped and pulled herself into her best attention position. "Hey, can I put this leash on you?"

"You can do anything you want with me," said Sunshine looking straight ahead.

"I mean, yeah. I am supposed to have you on a leash. Could you, maybe, bend down please so I can put this on you? I'm sorry. No...I'm not sorry...look, just clip this on your collar for me...slut. I suck at this. Look, we gotta hurry."

Well, thought Sunshine, this is indeed a first. First time I've put my own leash on. The seemingly clueless pixie held the leash limply in her hand and led Sunshine out of the Dungeon's main area and to towards the reserved play rooms. People gawked. They weren't supposed to gawk. Pixie stopped at a closed door and looked up at Sunshine with pleading eyes. "Ok. Look. You are mine. I got you. You are going to do what I say, ok? Like, exactly what I say, ok? So, like, if I wanna trade you I can. Right? Like I can trade you?"

Sunshine looked down at the much smaller girl and said "Trade? Trade me? I don't know if you can or not. The rules didn't say anything about trading. You want to trade me? You don't....you spent a lot of money if you don't want me. Ms. pixie is this girl not pleasing to you?"

Pixie look mortified. "Oh damn. No, no, no...God, you are soooo pleasing . You are just so hot! I wish I were hot like you. I'm so sorry. I am so sorry Ma'am, I didn't mean to say that! I just...I just don't know the rules now or exactly what to do. I...can you help me?"

"Ma'am? Did you just say Ma'am to me? I am not a Ma'am. I am not a switch, either. You bought me, and you want me to tell you the rules? You're asking me to decide for you if you can trade me? If this girl may respectfully ask, Ms. pixie, why in the world did you bid on me?"

The girl whose shirt announces she banged your Daddy like a cheap drum stood looking at the floor for a moment. "Like I said, it is complicated. I am supposed to Dominate you and maybe trade you. I don't know how to Dominate shit. Look...just be quiet. You don't know anymore than I do. Some help you are! Can you do that? Be quiet? Look, you are supposed to do what I say. So just do it. Please?"

"Yes Ms. pixie. Respectfully, like it or not, you are in charge."

She opened the door and led Sunshine into the room. On a couch sat Sunshine's Dom Mr. G and a man who appeared to be Santa Claus in tight black leather pants and a well worn Rolling Stones t-shirt.

Both stood and nodded their heads. "Greetings, it is the Domme pixie come to show us her newfound property!" boomed Santa in a jovial voice.

Pixie instantly brightened and in her eager little girl voice said "Hi, Big Daddy! Look! I did it! I did it! Look what I got!"

Mr. G just smiled and looked Sunshine in the eye. "Hello Domme pixie. It's an honor to see you again. I see you have Sunshine on your leash. I must say, my compliments. She appears to be a very fine specimen indeed."

"I know, right, Mr. G? You were right. She is so hot! Big Daddy, I did it just like you told me to. I was so scared. I wish you had been there to help me. But I did it!," beamed pixie. "Big Daddy, next time do you think I could be auctioned? I liked watching it sooooo much. Please? Please, Big Daddy? It looks like sooooo much fun! Big Daddy, was I good girl? I was a good girl! I was!"