All Comments on 'What happened to Jim?'

But just the wig and allegations of an affair seems like very weak evidence to sentence someone for murder. What happened to beyond a reasonable doubt??

And I cant see Tom ever trusting his whore of a wife to stay faithful to him for the 4 years he was in prison. What lesson did the wife learn? She got a holiday pass for 4 years to live like however she wished to.

Even after he gets out his life is ruined. He is forever marred as a convict(and for committing murder no less), there is no way he is living a good life then. He will never find a good job and he is forever fucked by the actions of his past.

I know many people wont agree with me but I felt that Jim's death was justified.

We are becoming too tolerant of morally bankrupt people who are all basically criminals. How many lives did Jim destroy in his quest for pussy.

Husbands and wives and kids who were brought up in broken homes.

Make it legal to kill someone for committing adultery and watch adultery fade away to almost nothing. I say we should do that for all crimes.

To quote Ra's al Ghul from Batman- "Criminals thrive on the indulgence of society's understanding."

There should be no mercy. Do this and watch all crime end.

_Wes.

Thanks for sharing.

I never did wonder what happened to Jim. I don't wonder what happens to shit when it is flushed down the toilet either. Who cares who killed him? Why bother investigating it? Why prosecute the man who killed him? The damage Jim did to other people deserved the death penalty. In today's wimp society everyone is supposed to be forgiven for everything. The damage a guy like Jim did lasts a lifetime and even more in some cases. It is better to scrape him off and throw him away. Too bad for his parents, they should have done a much better job raising him.

Ending was bullshit. Convicted on a wig bullshit. DA wouldn't of done anything with that little evidence.

Don't really care about Jim...

This lengthy epilogue was neither needed or wanted, plus it taints the original story. If I could go back, I would lower my previous votes for ch 1-3 because of this. Since I can't, 1* for this effort.

Not very interesting. Technically well written, no spelling errors, lol. Plot was a too realistic police procedural. Extreme length contributed to this being boring. Gave you 2*s. I feel this could have been an epilogue to part 3. Maybe a much better, tighter written 1 page.

Never thought about Jim. At all.

AMerryman

Should have just left it alone.

Who likes to blame everyone but the person responsible.

Regardless of infidelity, no one deserves to die because if he deserves death for sleeping with a married woman, what does the murderer deserve? Death as well? Should his parents or Selena carry out revenge murder?

My only complaint was the wig, why didn't they burn it? Other than that, 5 stars.

You better not try to write thrillers. It would not be a succes.

The plot is interesting though I should think that the defense could have found a lot of people that would be willing to help Jim out of the world... There is only circumstantial evidence.

Cold body withing 4 minuets of shots fired. Called people in to be raked over the coals without an attorney. None of this seems the least bit accurate. If you have ever witnessed a real court setting no one wants the truth. Lawyers only want yes and no answers so they can twist the truth. Not realistic at all

People weren't asking 'What happened to Jim' because it was some great mystery that needed another five fucking pages to solve. They were asking because your last story was so lazily written that you just threw out 'oh and the guy died, who knows why lol' on the last page because you wanted to give the btb crowd their little bit of violence to get a higher score but didn't want to spoil the 'husband is perfect in every way' thing you thought you were doing by having him do it.

This doesn't add anything other than just five more pages of your shitty dialogue and poor plotting. Please just give it up on this story, it wasn't very good.

Don't even read the comments from the ignoramuses that have never written a letter let alone a complicated story with a real plot... I enjoyed your original and your great sequel. Keep it up!!

In part 3 of while you were sleeping The epilogue said this : Jim's murder was never solved, as far as I know. We sent his family a sympathy card, but mostly because his parents were nice people.. I guess Matt Was so glad to have his marriage back He never noticed what was happening on the news

I do not think they got it right .?

Slow, plodding, inept, and clueless. The defense attorney must have been totally incompetent.

I agree with @rightbank...Nobody cares about what happened to Jim!!!! Or about who killed him...But use that to tell the story about the two married cops, was a good solution...3*

“The next morning was Monday” – At the risk of nit-picking, they worked Sunday night, then were on again Monday morning?

"Sheesh, they didn't seem very guilty to you, did they?" – I BELIEVE you intended for this to be sarcastic, but you should have said so! First you said they were in separate rooms, then you questioned them together?

How is Tom guilty and not Beth? And I agree with those who question how strong the wig evidence is, and why it wasn't just tossed out.

The defense would easily prove that the fibers matched a wig that was sold by the thousands if not hundreds of thousands. Then they would line up a dozen or so of the wigs and ask the prosecution's witness to identify which of the wigs is the wig being worn in the video. They found no weapon, they found no other clothing seen in the video, and they have no motive, since they can't prove Beth and Jim actually fucked. Did they try to match the lipstick on the glass with any lipsticks found Wilson house?

The cops didn't even have enough evidence to get a search warrant. The whole plot is a lame fail. And learn something about firearms. No mark left on a bullet indicates the brand and model of the gun it was fired from, unless you have the weapon and can match up the rifling marks. No weapon was ever produced in this story. The whole scenario is too stupid, so this must be some sort of joke: Hey, you really want to know what happened to Jim, well here's 5 pages of nonsense to keep you midget brains occupied.

I guess it worked.

For anyone that took the time to read this, and go a step further and post a comment, I thank you. I write these stories for fun, and hope that they entertain others as well. This story was exactly as I wanted it to be, but hindsight it probably should have gone in a different category. If you got to the end, and thought that this story was similar to a "law and order" episode, then I did my job. I have read all of the comments, and appreciate even those that are negative. I only had to delete one as it was not a criticism of the story, but simply a derogatory comment about me personally. Lastly, I will say that I agree with most of you. No one cares about Jim.....that was the whole point. Thanks again for reading my work, and I hope to be able to entertain you all with more in the future.

Thanks,

RNebular

Because other than Jim's parents, nobody else had any reason to give a damn what happened to him.

Seems to me that Matt and Jennifer got way too little scrutiny before being written off as suspects. Jim's known to have sex with married women, he spends a lot of time with Matt's wife while Matt's in a coma and soon after Matt wakes up he and Jennifer separate. Should have been a massive red flag and led to a lot more investigation of the couple.

Unrealistic because the only evidence is a common wig and a thin motive. Why thin? Because it was a motive shared by every victim, male and female, whom this serial womanizer interacted with. It could easily have been someone who only found out about an affair that occurred sometime in the past. Even a new attorney could poke so many holes in the case against the guy that the case would be laughed out of court. Even if such a case did end up with a guilty verdict it would be overturned on appeal I'm sure, and most likely the first lawyer would find himself facing an accusation of inadequate representation.

Would be that Tom's lawyer manages to suss out that Tom is actually guilty and persuades him to take a plea bargain. It's what happens in 95% of all felony cases.

but I don't think he is impressed, TK U MLJ LV NV

It was a brilliant story, no doubt.. But the crime seemed to be solved quite easily in spite of having such rich suspects

I would have preferred a series instead of a single one.. But great work nonetheless!!

Not good.

Save a lot of time and effort The Butler did it? Just pulin ya chain. Good story. 9 stars = 90 %. Bye. Greg.

This is the first story I ever read on Literotica that I wished I could give minus 10 stars. It's just plain horrid. I wouldn't want to meet guys who like this sort of rubbish in a dark alley.

I think this was well written.

Deserved to die. I couldn't believe how you ended story with comment about him having so much going for him.

Hell he even cheated on fiancee not to mention seducing a wife while husband was in coma

Yeah he was a great guy alright

Jim was a narcissistic predator that got what he deserved. Making him out to be some wonderful guy is ludicrous. He ruined or almost ruined a number of lives. Seduced his best friend's wife while friend was in coma a nd preyed upon wife's vulnerability.

Chasing after her claiming he couldn't live without her all while he was engaged and using insurance business to seduce married females.

How you came up with last paragraph brings questions about your character and mental state

Too bad his death was relatively painless.

YOUR ENDING DISPUTE EVERYTHING WRITTEN ABOUT THE GUY IN ''WHILE YOU WERE SLEEPING'' AND THIS ENTIRE SEQUEL

UNLESS YOU WERE BEING SARCASTIC.

If not, answer my feedback email with your wife's contact info. Your buddy JIM told me you weren't getting the job done!!!!!

The last few comments have me laughing. Yes, this whole story was an attempt at explaining the demise of Jim, but was not meant as some sort of sick tribute. The final comments about his sad end, was basically just my way of saying that had he lived differently, he "would have" had a lot going for him. He had good friends, a decent job, a fiance, and parents that cared. I guess I didn't make it clear enough, but if anyone got the impression that I was trying to make him out a hero, I apologize.

RNebular

Okay, this Jim didn't seem the same as his previous incarnation- in the first story he seemed more tragic, but here he was just a player. Finally getting the guy was anticlimactic- there wasn't really a connection there other than the process of elimination. So, he'd be careful and wipe/toss a burner phone, but keep a wig around?

Guilty just because of a wig and nothing else. Crap

Acted like he was fine with his nephew seducing married females. The fact that jim used the uncle's insurance agency as means to bedding those wives does not matter to him. Seems all of jim's family were okay with the destruction he caused in other people's lives as4 jim was such a ''good boy''

For me, you cannot get much more despicable than preying on the vulnerable state his best friend's wife was in while her husband was in coma!

After the other stories I figured it was one of the kids.

If I was on the jury, I don't think I could have convicted on that evidence. Perhaps on a civil trial, but not criminal.

he was found guilty but she wasnt. but they were each other alibi.

A good wrap up for your story. I, too , think Tom was convicted in very slim evidence. I think Jim paid a high price, but a man preys on married women risks it all. His sins caught up with him. Great series of stories.

but properly disposed of the gun?? Unlikely if the forensics at the scene were that clean. Finding matching lipstick at Tom's house would also help the case against Tom.

Can you really drink from a glass and leave lipstick but no skin cells? Or smear the lipstick with your fingers and leave no cells?

Olfrog14x

He didn't deserve to die.. bullshit you fuck other men's wives knowingly you get what you deserve

The main problem with the story was that a conviction on the evidence presented would have been almost impossible. However, it does complete the story.

My main question about the series is answered again. Jim definitely deserved it. There is closure.

“As someone once said, ‘Someone has a case of the Monday's’.”

“Pretty sure that was a movie line. That and two squirrels that used to be married...”

...but not 5-pages worth. Probably 2-pages maximum.

Also, as many say, the evidence was very VERY circumstantial and sparse. Even if Tom was bla... oh wait. He was black and the victim was white. Never mind.

So Matt then shot his 'wife'?

The jokes are lines from Office Space, a movie that I only found humorous after I started working in an office. I first saw the movie while still serving in the Army, and didn't get any of the jokes. Second time through had me in tears. 🤷‍♂️

I found the level of police investigation described very interesting. TV and movie scripts often solve crimes in a half-hour, but this made sense. People getting bent out of shape over the philandering Jim, who's a story character is ridiculous. The two cops getting laid every night was quite unexpected, but hey!

So what was the evidence they used for the search warrant? He was short?

Not worth the time spent reading.

“In each of their interrogation rooms, they had Marie Williams and her lawyer, Tom and Beth Wilson, and Selena Marsh. They had separated Tom and Beth into separate rooms, so four rooms in total were occupied.”

Yet, half a page later -

“They went into the next interrogation room, which Tom and Beth Wilson were sitting in. They were talking quietly to each other, and looked up when the door opened.”

Thank you for this closure to Jim’s murder. After Matt beat him up and the previous husband had caught him with his wife It’s not surprising that Jim would be end up with GSW.

I'm doubtful they'd be able to get a conviction with what they had, but I guess I could be wrong.

Overall, the story seemed superfluous.

Little goof in here, you establish that Dunleavy's a woman but at one point the person offering the detectives coffee refers to the pair as "gentlemen." I agree with some others that the evidence was pretty slim.

Good story. Liked that his partner was part of the "surprise party" con, his wife was running. Jim was a real shit. Surprised Tom Wilson, the aggrieved by husband got convicted. Evidence seemed largely circumstantial. Sounded like his wife.fell one time too to Jim the charming snake. Marie was a serial adulterer. Good to see her husband escaped. Some minor gaffes with thr interrogations (separate rooms for the Wilson's, then together). Surprised not rated higher.

Really you expect us to believe he got 8 total years 4 prison and 4 probation for a murder charge you either think your readers are idiots or have no clue what you're talking about the sentence is way to short for any murder charge and definitely not getting probation for it as far as getting a conviction on the evidence you listed only if the defense attorney is a fucking dumbass and incompetent any defensive attorney with any common sense would had that shit dismissed within the first 15 minutes now as far as him getting what he deserves damn straight he deserved to die as well as did every woman that was married that he fucked as well as every husband who stayed with there cheating slut