All Comments on 'What Just Happened?'

Great start/read! This one has the potential to be multiple chapters. Looking forward to the next installment. :-)

This has a lot of potential - you write well and I would love to read more of David's adventures. Thank you - five stars.

A somewhat unique writint style. A little hard to interpet at first. I look forward to see how the rest of this series goes.

Good start--out of the usual same-old. Please keep it going!

I was hoping I would be published. David and Beth have a journey yet, and David is clueless of where this journey is going.

Thank you for the comments

Kisses

Annie

Loved the story it is the situation i would have love to be in as I also like to dress in female clothing

For being your first published story, you did very well. Hoping to see the contiunation soon.

Wonderful story.. I loved it!

The story line wasn't bad but the writing was damn messy. What a shame!

what a hot wounderfull start to real hot sexy story

First time pushing the envelope or not, this is just bad writing. Find and editor writer, you could do with some help!

Not good at all. I shall give the rest a miss.

Grossly over-rated!

To find something so awfully written in Literotica!

What a waste of my time.

It's not that difficult to use quotations, is it?

I loved this first chapter of your adventures with David and all the others. I am a CD who would love it if my sister helped me explore my cross-dressing like you have done with David. I have however been shopping in VS with my girlfriend and we even let the salesgirls know that the clothes we were buying were actually for me. It was so exciting telling them and seeing them react when they find out that I'm a CD. I can't wait to read your next chapters. Annie, I truly wish that I was David.

I would include a scene when David puts on panties. When Beth reveals that she knows David wears panties it's a surprise, not because she knows, but because not even the reader knows. This doesn't really make sense. You also never said that David got his hair removed at the salon. Beth is saying these things out of the blue and it makes the story hard to follow. That being said, you have a good idea going here.

Great first chapter. I would love to have a bisexual stepsister (or cousin or neighbour or sister's friend) to help me with my crossdressing. It would be wonderful sharing my feminine desires with a woman.

Annie -- are you David? or is this fiction about someone else?

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PUNCTUATION MATTERS!!!!!