All Comments on 'What You Wish For Pt. 04'

I love it! TY for taking the time to write. <P>

I think DQS may have given you more incentive to write. Your latest efforts have been outstanding, the best on Lit. I used to compete in multi-sport events. My efforts in training were sub-par. I needed the thrill of competition to bring out the best in me. <P>

Now if we could only get our resident critic at large, HDK, to quit fawning over DQS and get off his butt. I enjoy his comments immensely but want him to write one of those stories that he does so well. <P>

Rated all four chapters of WHAT YOU WISH FOR A “5".

I know its bad form to comment on another writer’s work here, but Rehnquist open the door by launching the first volley targeting DQS1's tardiness in submitting chapters in a timely manner. DQS1 suggested in a comment to chapter 5d of WWWM that she/he (contrary to others, I think DQS1 is a LADYBOY) felt reinvigorated with the completion of this chapter, and she indicated subsequent chapters would be appearing quicker. Well, we are now approaching a month, and still no chapter 6a. I hope those of you who profess to love her/worship her send in more comments so she can post the next chapter. But, don’t hold your breath; the bitch is definitely untrustworthy.

Great...this is the best story on Lit! There is no other story close...

Thank you!

I gave you a 5, always do. You're entertaining and captivating with your imagination and smooth flow of character interaction and events as they unfold.

Unfortunately, you discarded our Susan and I guess you'll find a way to make us feel good about that. I'm disappointed!!!

You're doing the reconciliation thing with the cheating Ex, justifying her conduct. Sorry, not buying it but - your story.

BTW, you constantly portray him as a positive, no nonsense right and wrong guy that makes decisions that are well thought out and final...and now, do we see his character wavering while allowing Kristin to visit???

You had dropped a girlfriend hint about Allison with Marissa and now - Not.

Unhappy as I am, I will definitely read the last two chapters for a few reasons......

1) You're damn good!!!

2) I really think (hope) you have more surprises for us, something we'll

all like!!!

3) Too good a story to not finish 'The Hollywood Movie - The Romance

Novel.

I don't hate Kristin, what she gave away with her selfishness is gone, cannot be taken back. Sorry that she is matured to a point of realizing her self centered conduct ruined her dreams...all she had to do was talk...now she wants to? I guess we'll find out soon enough where your head is Ren???? She ran away and now she wants to come back for a pass. She was wrong and they both realize her acceptance of her conduct and that she lost something that even now she really wants so...let's see what kind of a writer you are?

Well, I'm rambling. No criticism intended, just disappointment but again, you're good so we'll just have to keep reading.

Thanks again!

I love this story. The plot is interesting and full of emotion. The characters are complex and flawed. I don't know how this will all play out, but I hope for a happy ending, one way or another.

really it is. I love the dad -- a Powerful character.

You went out of your way to show what it is about Kirstin that gives her such appeal... which I have always held is very important.

I dont have an issue with SOME sort of reconcilation but a full one would be very bad and IMO unjustified. The fact that Kirstin appears to growing up some does not mean Tyler should take a 2nd chance.

what do we do about the evil interfering sister?

Five.

But let's hope Tyler keeps his options open, Kristin is still hiding something. I think that there may still be room in his life for a relationship with Susan or even his editor. I'm sure you'll keep us on our toes.

Maybe I am alone in this but I don't hate Kristen. Yes she may be a bit spoiled but she was still lonely and lonliness can make people do stupid things. She tried to solve her lonliness with shopping when all she wanted was Tyler. You live and you learn, and it seems she has grown up since all this went down.

If Allisyn and Kristen are so close then she wouldn't have slept with her cousin's ex husband. It's that whole rule about not sleeping with your friend, or family members', ex. And while she may have hinted at Ben being his son she should have opened up her mouth, she is just as guilty.

I guess I wouldn't be opposed to a reconciliation and long as Kristen doesn't become a shrew. Because while she has her flaws so does everyone else. But reading their interactions towards the end gave some hint about how it was before between them, and it was sweet.

Well done. As far as the no sex. With the plausible plot and character development I do not need it. As a matter of fact with what you did with Kristen's character I can even hope for them getting together down the road. Of course. I am not a burn the bitch kind of person. I am one who believes people make mistakes and change. You did good my friend in fleshing her out to make her more sympathize to us men who are more than possession nuts. Nice job of writing against your own code. Admirable even.

I do see a trend where you tend to reveal your surprises and twists a bit early for real suspence. There were some obvious hints early on that the boy belonged to Tyler. You pretty much told us that Tyler was not going to end up with Susan. Then the cousin, Allie(?), was dismissed. We are down to the ex or the editor. I do not find Kristin very likable, but I am enjoying this story. This is the way we are are supposed to feel while reading. We become a part of the story and identify with the characters. They have become our friends. That indicates the writer has done a fine job. Thanks, Judge!

I like what you have done with Kristin.....still missing Susan a bit though. I can't wait to see if Kristin is for real or is she playing more games. The happy ending would be Tyler, Kristin, and Ben together riding off into the sunset. I have to admit I kind of want that to be the case. However, it seems predictable and boring also. Great job so far!

Like all the other comments (at least the one's I could understand) I agree it is a great story. I'm also a bit upset by Susan being left behind, but then I'm not the one writing the story and can assure you it wouldn't be near as good if I were. Waiting for the next chapter. Thank you...

Amazing turn to the story...though I personally don't support the reconcilliation part (meaning marriage). Friends would be a better ending but I'll be holding off on it till the end of the story. Regardless of where this turns, I look forward to reading it. And I really don't care about the sex bit in it as it's what's apart from the sex that is luring me back!

doing a good job as far as i'm concerned, appreciate your timely entrys.

I was a bit apprehensive after the first chapter that it would dwindle away but it just keeps getting better.

By the way, thet serve papers on Sundays?

As always. I like how you've portrayed the characters. You've done a great job fleshing out the ex. I could see them becoming friends again, but how could you trust her? Sure she's realized she'd made a mistake, but that doesn't really mean she's changed, she's just still chasing her dream. There is no way to know when she'll decide to chase another dream and whether or not it'll include him. I thought Susan would have been a better choice. The editor would make a good choice, but I disagree with the previous commenter that he has no other choices. As he's getting out and about he may find someone better. Still, the ex wife has demonstrated that she can't be trusted. People don't change that much. No need to burn her, but no need to make her relevant to his decision making process either. I'm looking forward to reading the next couple chapters to see how you have it all turn out.

R,

This is so great. You said you listened to "comments" regarding Knox County and the time, which was a year to write. WYWF, is submitted finished. My pleasure is that no reader comments influenced your story.

I'll not compare you to any number of other writers. Some who are influenced by reader comments (as they are submitted with future chapters "un-written") lose the original flow; perhaps to me their story is tainted. By not running a comparison I'll enjoy each for what they are and enjoy every writer on Lit. for their efforts and ignore poor comments!

Well as far as WYWF, I/we look forward to the next part. Enjoyed the comments now and know they are just that, not influential critics.

Thanks for sharing on Lit.... Very Much!

x

great story but this chapter has spoiled it for me with the killing off of Susan. Unlesss... unless Susan and the goth editor are one and the same?

That Susan is only going to be "just his lawyer" and not more, but am awaiting the next chapter while on the edge of my chair.

Thanks for your great story.

Tom

I will freely admit that I AM a "burn the bitch" guy. That's why I'm amazed at the fact that I don't hate the Kristin character.

She was extremely selfish and spoiled, yes, she wanted to eat her cake (lots of money) and have it (Tyler being there for her). And when one of those didn't happen, she screwed up by cheating.

Selfish and stupid, but not the pinnacle of evil. What really helps is that she doesn't rub Tyler's face in it. She doesn't blame him.

As for keeping her son a secret from Tyler, that one was motivated by fear. Fear of losing her new husband, or losing her son to Tyler. Still a vile thing to do though...

That said, I don't see her as a "sudden personification of evil" like a lot of wives are in other LW stories.

Tyler's dad was great, I really liked the fact that he called out Kristin on the bad things she did, and forced her to explain, without letting her make any excuses. Far too many stories simply gloss over the bad stuff the wife does, or never mention them again.

I also like that Tyler is still doubting and secondguessing Kristin's motivations. Even with a sudden son on the scene, he doesn't lose his head and forget what Kristin did.

There is one thing that jarred a little though. Kristin's second visit, with her little boy. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it looked like she walked in there as if she owned the place. Shouldn't she have been at least a little apprehensive about facing Tyler's dad again? Especially after last time? Or was that a show of bravado on her part? Now that I think about it, it probably was (her smokebreak seemed to indicate that). Tyler's dad probably wouldn't throw her out, not when his grandson is there...

Anyway, good story. Eagerly waiting for the next part.

I find my self looking forward to the next episode and enjoy reading it. Sometimes i find myself fast forwarding over descriptive parts in the story that are redundant but other than that, good story!

Good job with Kristen, her character and motives for what she did are clearly set out, one doesn't necessarily loath her any longer. I do feel that Tyler deserves a few more dalliances with the lawyer hottie, even a goth experience !! Just so Kristens understands how good a catch Tyler is.

I am really enthralled by this story. It is credible and realistic. Can't wait for Part 5.

Compelling story, but I have a bad feeling about the direction it's going. Will he wimp, or won't he? You have succeeded admirably in giving the selfish slut wife depth and character. Her attempts at reconciliation whether driven by desperation, or remorse, are very compelling, creating a real dilemma for our hero, and some real tension (for this reader at least). I could see forgiveness, without him being stupid enough to get back together with her. Personally I'm holding out for Susan to make a surprise come back, and am waiting with baited breath (anchovies) for the final installment.

.. the preface is unnecessary and beneath you. Write YOUR story and let the chips fall where they may.

I think we are all hooked.

What I especially like is the careful, realistic approach Tyler takes to Kristin and to himself.

If I were him I'd want a lot of proof that she understands what she did wrong and a lot of convincing that it won't happen again before I'd even think about any reconciliation beyond being friends. But he must build some decent relationship with her in the best interests of their son.

the Bitch will get her way. Kristen has no love for him, she just misses her Dream. He will fall for her one way or another, even after everything she has done to him. This story is still a good read but it has gone way down hill with the bitch working her way back into his life.

but the author may be leading us one by making Kristin into a more transparent character. I can understand loneliness, but she has a contact that she could have worked, or is Tyler not quite the nice guy that has portrayed as, so far? The other problem is that she had unprotected sex with two different guys within a short time frame. That was a truly stupid action! Either she is more complicated than she claims or she is an evil bitch!

Left a comment at the first chapter. Some of my questions have been answered in later chapters. And I can't wait and see what new reversal or revelation is forthcoming. Thank you once more Mr. R., for grabbing my interest and providing a good read.

out of 5. darn, two more chapters. *sigh* is there another story coming soon after this one? please!

Still a strong 5!

There will be a car wreck, the baby will die, Kirstin will live, Tyler won't remarry her and she will live a life of bitter irony, the cop who married her will be on the scene of the car wreck and, oh, who knows the mind of Mr Rehnquist.

Ok, I relent and give this 5 stars. Isn't it fun to explore all the ways this could go? We can all just sit around for days and days and talk about what could have been, what should have been and what might be. Just a great way to spend time, isn't it?

Ok, you all share, now.

Artful demonstration of Tyler's strong family life through his working with his dad, his dad speaking truth to Kristin, Tyler returning home to help his with his mom's recovery, and his loving appreciation of his parents love for their grandchild. So Tyler demonstrates that his dream was family life, and the Florida bond salesman was a means to an end.

Now we see the possibility that Kristin is truly remorseful and that her Sunday visit was the beginning of a very difficult act of contrition. Some people can accept their fault and grow through their acceptance, remorse, and contrition. Very few achieve it, but some do, and if they do foregiveness is earned and can be accepted if freely given.

I do not mean that Tyler should re-marry Kristin, rather that through earned forgiveness they can both heal and parent Ben together. Their future relationship is a separate matter: they are different people than they were and may not fit together as a couple.

The biggest obstacle seems to be Kristin's family, while Tyler's family and friends are their biggest support.

A very well conceived and executed story. Congratulations, so far.

"Okay, timeout here to explain what's going through my addled fucking brain."

Oh boy, do you have that right!

Your writing is excellent, but I am still hoping he goes in a different direction. Too much water under the bridge here even though Kristen is actually turning out to be a person and not a total bitch. But then, that is my personality being interjected into your story.

If he doesn't end up with Susan, can I have her address?? (LOL)

The story is still great definitely another 5, but relegating Susan to just the lawyer killed me. If this is as you said a study in developing female characters, you may be developing the wrong one. She's done more for Tyler, in her few short scenes than his wife has in the whole story, she's been far more honest and less self serving too. We all know the ex wife is all about herself, I see this latest contrition act as just trying to get him back so she can cash in. Great job though as usual.

I am not ready to forgive Kristin. To even go there, you need to believe she is truly remorseful. That I do not believe.

Mr. Rehnquist, in has favorites, pointed me to a story by Salamis titled Mercenary. In that story I found my most hated female character. Kristin is not far behind. I am waiting to see if my mind can be changed.

So far my favorite chapter. 20 stars down, 10 to go.

about a human relationship; it is an injustice to your reader!!! You take away the possibilities of the storyline. Had a shot at DQ an episode or two ago in "WWWM" when he had Bill say something to the effect that "He and Debbie would NEVER be together again!" When you have Tyler say that his relationship with Susan "would now FOREVER be as lawyer and client," you shoot down a possibility for which many of us have strong expectations, expectations which you built with your storyline. At least let that possibility remain until he makes a final decision about Kristin.

It would be sad if Ben wasn't Tyler’s son.

But seeing how much of a lying slut Kristin can be, Ben may not be his son. She may be just playing the game to get Tyler back and of course his money. One would have to believe that she didn't have sex with someone else other than Randy while away from her home in Florida while still married to Tyler, and her track record of not telling the truth is very strong.

At least that's what I think Kristin is capable of doing to preserve her life style of the little rich kid she use to be.

However it works out, the story is becoming complicated and the characters are very well defined. Everything is still up in the air about Tyler's love life, and it would be a feather in his cap if he nailed Kristin just one more time.

I'm not giving up on Susan the lawyer, even if he thought that she would be forever just his attorney and that's all.

Thanks for the good chapter.

Definitely a 5. Just please don't destroy him or relegate him to a spineless wimp.

beautiful writing embellished with in-depth characterizations. Precise: the analysis of Kristin displayed a concision never before seen in LIT.

I absolutely cracked up at the exchange between quarterback and the center and I have never done that reading a story here before. Way to go. It's great that your are writing again. Being born, raised and a very long term resident of the city an hour away I really appreciate the authenticity of your characterizations and the feel of your narrative. Please keep it up and Thanks For the time and effort you put into your work.

just keeps getting better. i don't think that i would let her back in my life yet

This is a wonderful story, but I tend to agree with HDK's comment about your telegraphing story surprises too early for any "real" suspense. Unless of course they are "red-herrings" just to mis-direct us, your loyal and (very) demanding readers.

Having said that, I still love everything you write and this series is no different. You have an amazing talent and I sincerely hope you consider writing professionally (read novel). I'd pay money to buy your books. I guess is the ultimate compliment for any writer/author.

Thank you and keep surprising us.

Although it was planted that Susan was going just be his lawyer. I think her eyes have been opened and with the office in Chcago nearby there is still hope for Susan to make a return. I just can't get my head around to him with either his editor or his ex.

This continues to be a very good story.

But this part about perhaps taking her back...... Admittedly, I draw from personal experience in real life, but the reality is that once a woman says goodbye, the smarter man takes that as a final resolution. Such an outlook probably doesn't make for the "happy ending" scenario, but then, sometimes that's just the way life turns out to be.

Keep writing.

I've always found the 1 through 5 rating system adequate, but this chapter especially deserves something just a bit more. I'm not going to go superlative bullshit 99, but the way you have handled so many really difficult and complex issues here is just beyond five.

Your description of mother, stroke victim, the skin pallor, waneness of her right side, her response to therapy, the equipment needed is perfect. Too, the so obvious pleasure at seeing, holding her grandchild for the first time is exact. You can always see the communication in the eyes.

I've been to parties like the one you described. I recall meeting a group of three buddies I went to high school with twenty-five years and twelve hundred miles away and it was just like Tyler the QB meeting his friend the center after a dozen years.

So many scenes in this chapter are just perfect: Kristen showing up at the party, the small town America bringing lunch when Tyler's mother comes home from the hospital, Tyler's description of Kristen's affect on men to name just a few. The only criticism at all is Natalie, and that is her name; she clearly is a Thelma in my mind. I drew a mind picture of Thelma Ritter.

I'm not going to argue the reconcilliation or not issue, that's for the Chief Justice to decide as it fits his story. As a parent and grandparent I will make this one point; marriages are much more than two person affairs. Those who say never reconcilliation in any circumstance I judge to be small minded ignorant souls of little value to the world population.

Still one hell of a good story Chief Justice and I assume that with your skills it will continue as such.

with your story, after reading this chapter I went back and re-read your Introductions at the beginning of part 02 and I quote, "I'm not telling you whether there will be revenge or (God forbid!) reconcilitation. Now I feel better.

I guess, because we all are different, we make our own choices. But, I feel everyone does things for their own self-interest. If you take revenge, or forgive and reconcile or even help others, it's only because you want to. I prefer forgiveness and reconcilliation, it's more fulfilling for me. Just to add, to most everyone else's praise, I'm thoroughly enjoying myself and wait eagerly for the next.....

Thank you!

"'You, too, hotshot Florida legal eagle,' I replied, hugging her tight and knowing our relationship would forever now be that of attorney and client."

NNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When you decide that you're going to delve into the woman's psyche, you mean what you say. Damn! That was one heck of an emotional roller coaster ride! I can honestly say that I felt like I was a fly on the wall during that last act. I could feel the emotions of Tyler and Kristin. Although I want to hate Kristin, you made it so that I actually felt sorry for her. Don't get me wrong. I don't condone what she's done or trust her further than I can throw her but I could feel her genuine regret at the stupid selfish decisions that brought her to this point in her life.

I can also understand Allie's loyalty to her cousin. She was obviously caught between a rock and a hard space and make the wrong choice. I thoroughly enjoyed the banter between Tyler and Benny.

So far this story has surpassed all of my expectations! And you can trust me when I say those expectations are always extremely high when I see Rehnquist is the author! You have been a favorite since your first post and I continue to see improvement and growth in your writing. Thank you for providing an enjoyable read. Looking forward to the rest of the story.

~S

It had better come with a prenup that excludes sales from any of the five books. Somehow, there has to be some payback for what she put him through. I don't think she understands what she put him through. Kristin is still living in a selfish world where only her feelings count.

Personaly, I would ever trust Kristin ever again. I would make sure that she gets money to take care of Ben, and have joint custody.

Yes, you did flesh Kristin out. Not a perfect portrayal, but she's far, far from being a simplistic cardboard cutout. The thing is, Kristin is a grasshopper, and Tyler is an ant. I doubt very seriously if she is capable of changing enough to ever be a match for Tyler, or for Tyler to forgive her for having abandoned him. But I'm willing to be proved wrong.

It occurs to me that the one thing that seems to really set Tyler off is that he can't stand it when anyone is less than forthright with him. So I could see him getting back together with Susan at some point, or even with Marisa. But Kristin or Allie, not so much.

Ah well, you've already finished the story, so I guess I'll just have to wait and see how it all comes out.

Rated it as a "5," by the way.

Your description of the meeting with Tyler's parents and the little boy was awesome! It was the best part of the chapter. It struck a little bit close to home.

I am a little disappointed that Susan seemed to be put out of the running for a place in Tyler's future.

It is kind of refreshing not to be hating Kristin this far into the story. On the other hand, I can't tell if she really wants to be back with Tyler or if she really just wants assurances that he won't take the baby away from her. At this point, Tyler might be better off being a supportive friend to his ex-wife rather than a husband.

There are still two chapters to go so we will see where his Honor takes us. It's a compelling story. Thanks for sharing it with us Rehnquist!

I'ts hard to believe, but the story just gets better.

Please continue. I can hardly wait for the rest of the story!!

Kristin is his muse. His anger with her has enabled him to write one book written and half complete another. But it's a 3 book deal. Uh oh. Sounds look more trouble brewing. <P>

Thanks for sharing.

another tale that keeps us on pins and needles waiting to see what happens.

I won't begin to tell you how I think this should go. They're your characters and must react as you see fit.

Just be gentle please.

Thanks for your hard work.

Woodmanone

Well said BobNbobbi. Just remember, it is Tyler's perception that the relationship with Susan is relegated to lawyer/client. Who knows what the future (and author) holds.

Although part of me doesn't want Tyler to forgive Kristin, I can understand why he would. As a single mother, my first choice is to keep the family together, so my kids could have the security of a complete familial unit. Things didn't work out for me, but they do for others.

Your insight into Kristin's reasoning was on point. While I still don't trust her, I find myself hoping she can be redeemed for Ben's sake. I see these characters as real people, with real problems. You have done your job well. Better than I anticipated, with much less bitterness than I thought this installment would have.

Thanks for this chapter, and I can't wait for tomorrow's submission.

sorry bro, got none for ya. you are doing all i require: entertain me for awhile. by telling me that Kristin realizes she missed her dream by this much by being a spoiled brat and getting bad family advice. reuniting father and son. you are doing everything i require, so quibbling over structure and metaphors and God knows what else, i will leave to the masses who ( think ) they know better. thanks for the installment. hurry up with the next. don't be a DQS and keep us hanging...

Just a story and a very silly one, get real in real life she would not get as much as an hello from him after what she did so i can't like something i know is base only on fantasy.

This is why I keep coming back to this genre or category or whatever it should be called. Over the last year or so I have come to see that there is talent here, and I appreciate the considerable work invested in creating these stories. And we get to read them for FREE!!

Thank you Rehnquist, for your work and for the priviledge of being able to read it in this venue. You, DQS1, Woodmanone, StangStar06, Slirpuff, Sir Thopas, OldHideki, and a few others are what make it worthwhile. Scanning through all the crap and drivel some of these people throw out is hard, and waiting on your next installment is harder. But I think it's worth the investment of my time to be able to enjoy your product.

Thank you.

Isn't there a song that says lonely women make good lovers? They did talk at each other instead of to each other. I don't think Tyler would have moved, at that point they were combatants, he would have probably told her to get a job again. They both thought here he or she comes with the same old bullshit again. She really fucked up, no doubt. I personally could not forgive her, but I would be nice for the sake of the boy. Babies smooth allot of things. People do not always do what they are supposed to or whats right. On that note, I have been before a judge a time or two. Before I met my wife and she cured me of my wickedness, or tried to. Of course our resident lawyer nailed that one, they could be just as well saying next at a fast food joint, depending on the judges mood.

After reading this I have to wonder if the other male writers here actually know how men interact with each other. I travel the country a few times a year looking for antique and exotic automobiles to restore, thats the main thing I do for a living. The men that I have met mainly act and treat each other the way they do in R's stories. It makes me think that some writers here sit behind a desk and never bullshit with the average man, or a rich one for that matter. Rehnquist, this is not the first time I have heard the term dick skinners. As in...get your dick skinners on that thing boy, it ain't gonna' pick itself up. Good stuff. Randy has had his introduction to the female of the species, he will never be the same. He deserves it, he knew she was married. He now understands that the split between a womans legs can be dangerous and debilitating. The mother in this story made me think of my mom and aunts, the frailty of getting older. Thats what makes the old age sex thing so hard to believe. I think you are getting the actions and thoughts of characters right, or close to reality. I will continue to read for another dose.

Well, I'm disappointed that Susan has been dumped so precipitously. You also blew off Alie, justifiably. The relationship with Kristin is going in a questionable direction. Working with her to raise their son, OK. Getting back together with her, no way. Yeah, Kristin seems to have finally woken up. Good for her. But she listened to her sister and parents over her husband, was a complete spoiled brat about the situation, and carried out a planned betrayal of her husband. She continues to game and manipulate by not telling him about his son or the truth of her situation with Randy. This is a woman out for herself. My final judgment of this story is going to depend on how it turns out. You did a great job of developing Kristin as a person not worthy of Tyler. I don't think you can successfully take that back. On the other hand you seem to be blowing off all his other choices in women.

Reconciliation with Kristin? Were I Tyler, it would be over my dead body. One can't simply undo all the things she did. "Whoops, my bad! I didn't really mean it . . . " No way, Jose. It takes time to rebuild trust, not just a hard on in Tyler's pants. Pretty insulting to males in general, even if it may be true at times (that the little head tries to do the thinking).

One other thing no one else has pointed out -- Kristen got pregnant without getting Tyler's agreement! He said he wasn't ready to start a family, but she decided unilaterally to get pregnant. Obviously she stopped using birth control. Maybe it was Kristin's plan as part of her decision to leave Tyler, or maybe she simply stopped the birth control and did not care who fathered a child by her.

The male readers who are married and who have children should think about this -- imagine if your wife just decided on her own to get pregnant, never mind what you think? How would you react to that? As Tyler said, for Kristin, it was always all about her and what she wanted. I realize there is a failure rate for birth control, but what are the odds of that failure occurring on the one time in six months that she and Tyler had sex, and that she was also ovulating at that specific time? Pretty slim to none. So she stopped her birth control, no other conclusion makes sense.

I realize the story is already done but I have a problem swallowing Tyler's descent into wimp-dom, should that occur. It would contradict everything already developed in his character. There is of course one other possibility raised by Digdaddyrich and possibly a few others -- Ben might not have been fathered by Tyler. Once a cheater, always a cheater; Kristin could be lying about only having sex with Tyler and Randy. Hope we find out the answers to all of the puzzles soon. Thanks for writing.

I feel a quasi-reconciliation coming on, and that's a good thing. I'm still rooting for Susan, but Dennis Miller and all that.

I've watch Maury too often to buy that Ben is Tyler's son, at least out of hand. Kristin ONLY slept with Tyler and Goober (evil cop); but WAIT! THERE'S MORE! A twist, a forgotten one-nighter? Pardon while I scratch my beard...

In any event, civility is NOT spinelessness. I'd personally never trust Kristin again, but if there's a child in common, one needs not be an asswipe.

I thought Allie got tossed under the bus, more or less gratuitously; but I kinda waffle on that one. Then again, I come back to Susan... (oplease oplease oplease).

This is likely, given the number of threads in place, to go on for at least three more installments. Oh, damn. Something to look forward to.

Oh, and by the way, yer honor: Get Marisa to proof for you. "Yours" does not need an apostrophe. Just sayin...

Well, I'll just sit here and wait for the next installment.

Absolutely no idea where this is going right now, but I'll be up for the next chapter... Curiously...!?

Really enjoying this one...it would be a real surprise if the baby wasn't his, but he decides to support him because of the reaction of his mom and perhaps for the sake of the 11 years together, but he can never trust her. They both have been in love with the same person...her. She put her needs before her husband's every time. He should see that by now. But if it helps his mother to recover, he may be willing to let his parents believe that Ben is their grandson. Plus Kristin may help..via some agreement between the 2. Also, there is only one character that has stood by him, sacrificially....Susan. He should be smart enought to realize that.

Anyone but me seem to dislike Kisten and her whole family? K. leaves her husband with not a word, then is unhappy about her lack of funds with hubby #2. The cousin hooks up with him knowing the baggage. The sister (Cilla) is as a snaking the grass for steering the selfish K. to leave. No feedback from K's parents other than they are ashamed of their daughter for making the look bad. Wow, they're a mess! Well mister QB file for free agency, take the kid and move along to someone who has some common decency. God, don't you just love the angxst.

Kristen got pregnant without her husband's "agreement"? Sometimes things happen and it actually ISN'T a big conspiracy. Kristen's big issue is that she listened to her family instead of standing by her husband. But his absence gave their arguments more weight and Kristen folded. It was a deadly combination. He was gone a lot, she was hearing all this stuff from her parents and sister, and then when he was home he wasn't lsitening to her arguments. Recipe for problems.

She isn't making any demands of Tyler finacially for Ben. But at least she's doing the right thing. It does seem like she has found some sense.

Can't wait for the next installment!!! WOW

First of all, we hope reconciliation of the slut ex-wife and seemly wimp husband is not going to happen. Second, Randy is a by-stander & victim of the slut ex-wife's manipulations - should he not get some credit for marrying a "already pregnant slut"? Fortunately, Randy has some foresight and divorces the slut before she can inflict more harm to his situation. Comments or disagreements?

the story is a winner - great writing, characters, pace, plot, dialogue, everything top notch. Keep up the good work!

Understood why the cousin was out. But really hated to see Susan duped so easily. She has been at his side all along and has done nothing but help him and has looked for nothing in return. Being on a friendly basis with his ex, for his son's and parents sake, is a good idea. Getting back together, not. I think there are still some things unsaid and I would not trust her. If he dropped the cousin because she knew about Ben but said nothing, then why take the ex back when her transgression was even greater. Like I said, I would like to see Susan with him, and the editor as a good friend and confidant. Both those women are smart as can be and are looking out for him. That's wife material.

Scored all 5s until this chapter. I just cannot grasp a situation where the husband could so easily forgive a cheating wife. Hold her hand at a gathering of old friends? You would need some really low self esteem to be friendly or get back together with such a woman.

I have anxiously awaited every chapter but now have lost faith in Tyler. I sorta hope Tyler remarries her and she steals his book, all his money, and takes the kid far away. Oh well, at least you have me involved with the story and characters--I just ain't happy.

You have learned from authors such as Ohio, HDK and DQS and are now producing a story that is easily comparable to their best work. Character development is incredibly well done; their conflicts come through as real and realistic; and finally anyone who has been through the loss of a wife through work caused neglect recognizes the grip on reality in your story.

Go to Susan because Kristin is being very manipulative.

Kristin is not be trusted! She's a lying manipulative bitch...

I read your outline at the beginning of this part, and you were right. Ben needs a puppy, and a therapy dog would be great for mom too. Never knew an author went through so much, what with the agent, editor, publisher et al, but it helps when they are all hot ladies. Yes, 60 is still a sweet young thing to me. LOL

I believe she is desperate and trying to salvage what is left. How could Tyler get back with Kristin when she has screwed him so badly. Where is his self respect? I am disappointed that you have written Susan out of the picture!

I have read many, many stories on this site, and this is only the second time I've felt moved to make a comment: simply outstanding. The characters seem effortlessly (not really the case, I know) real, with no suspension of belief required whatsoever. If this is an exerercise to flesh out female characters, you've succeeded to an outstanding degree. They are three dimensional. Kristin for example is an immature, screwed-up mess, but she's not wholly a villain. As a lawyer, I also appreciated your accurate portrayal of what typically happens at the bench. Wonderful work; easily a five.

When it takes longer to read the comments than to read the story, then you know someone has got it awfully right or awfully wrong!

No doubt which one of the two is appropriate here.

'What I'd wish for' is that I could write like this!!

that "once a cheater, always a cheater."

But I'm pretty sure I believe that "once a selfish, manipulative person, always a selfish, manipulative person." It's hard to see that Kristin is very different from who she used to be. She's just had some really bad things happen to her (which she brought on herself).

Hard to believe that Tyler could even *think* about getting back with her again.

Great story, though!

ohio

This is simply an excellent story. What makes it so is that it seems everyone who reads it is somehow invested in it and wants an ending as they would like or feel reality would dictate. But, the reality is the ending will be yours and a lot of people who clearly invested in this story will like it or not, but it is and will be an excellent story, well told, and well writen.

Congratulations.

oh well...good read...

he needs to get away from all the family drama shit and just stay friends with Kristin. getting involved again will just enable her to mess up again, knowing how easy it would be to get him back.

Susan is the one for him! he needs to pick things back up with her. I'm sure she's sick of the workworkwork life she has now and would settle down with him. DO IT!

I was hoping he would go back to the lawyer. I must read on.

Rehnquist :What You Wish For Pt. 04

We now know the reason for the wife's departure from Tyler's life and have a better understand of how she feels about her past and present. It's also clear that she has many regrets and has matured. There is a hint that she wants to allow Tyler to know his son, allowing him to form a deep relationship with him and interact in his life while maintain a friendly relationship with her ex. The future looks promising in this regard for Tyler, though he needs to decide what he wants and his future writing will impact this and many new possibilities may impact this as well.

The handling of Kristen's character and her disclosure to Tyler was treated sensitively and had a real feminine appeal in how she came across to the reader as a true to life woman with weaknesses, desires, emotions, and dreams. The impact of loneliness, return visits home, family swaying her to return home, male attention to her which she longed for, took its toll on Kristen leading to her split with Tyler. Now she suffers from guilt having realized the mistakes she has made, a reality shared by other women today and must now try for some form of reconciliation to ease her guilt and seek forgiveness for her stupidity with Tyler. The bargaining with the lawyers regarding the custody etc. of her son reinforces her desire to make amends with Tyler. Though she has been looked upon and shunned by the readers, her actions and sincerity through this chapter have cast her in a more favourable light gaining some compasssion and forgiveness for her past actions. This though will be reserved for a period allowing her to prove her words by her actions.

The author expressed concern at portraiting women in a true to life form. I have no issues whatsoever with how Kristin has been protrayed in this chapter. Her actions, words, and emotions are plausible and realistic.

Simply_Me

It appears that they will be back together as a family. I was wishing for this.

Nice writing - well designed still and holds the interest -

I am a bit too skittish about Kristin - even if she has learned her lesson, has she fundamentally changed?? No real stimulus for that yet - she has not had to meet any real challenge by herself - she was still totally overwhelmed that Dad laid into her the way he did. She still sees herself as the princess - it is still way too likely she is manipulating to keep the child not really get Tyler.

Tyler deserves better - he should be a big part of his child's life not the live father though

I haven't read the next part yet, but I am "skittish" as they say, about a reunion of Tyler and Kristin. I wouldn't wish for it ... cheating on him for a dream was disgusting enough, and while I can see how it was down to naivety/stupidity of a younger woman, I have my reservations. Besides that, Tyler has all the women going for him! Does having a beautiful kid with a woman tie necessarily him to her to be married? But I guess that's what your next chapter is about: "Trying to find love again"

I know she is hot and he literally drools out the side of his mouth when he sees her, but when is enough.. enough. Surely this story will have a happy ending but please don't let it be with the "ex".

you have to go on safari. TK U MLJ LV NV

Don't do it ! I can see where this is going, DO NOT , I repeat, DO NOT PUT KRISTEN & TYLER BACK TOGETHER! No no no no. First off just because they have a kid that doesn't mean they should be together -- Kristen is a selfish lazy good for nothing tramp who's constantly dreaming instead of getting off her lazy ass and getting a fucking job or going to school, she was repeated told to get a job and she steadfast refused vehemently... I don't see how she's changed in 18 months, she still thinks everybody owes her something & everyone should worship her skankyass. Tyler needs to start thinking with his head instead of with his dick, this is the same trick that left him while he was working his but off so she can keep up with joneses, she didn't even had the decency to call him & tell him she was leaving she just packed up all of the furniture that HE purchased & left. I'm 100% certain if the relationship with randy hadn't ended in chaos she never would've wanted to get back with Tyler, now that Tyler has money she wants back in, I don't care what she says--her actions from the past left its impression on me as a reader. Putting her selfishness aside, she cheated on Tyler for 6 months or less it really isn't irrelevant , the point is she fuck'd douchebag randy while she was still married. So there's ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY nothing to think about when it comes to getting back together. She left him for a dream, shes a dreamer , she'll dump his ass again for the next idiotic dream that pops into her pea brain head. She's not to be trusted. I'm a bit confused as to how much did she think randy the local cop made?! Cops don't get paid squat, so she really traded in a mansion for a cardboard box, that just shows how dumb this bitch is. When she stole/hid the fact that Tyler had a son all because she was only thinking of herself. This isn't the type of chic that should be married she's too fickle. I'm really hoping you don't screw the pooch on this one because there's no way a man would take this gutter tramp back.

but no go, making Kirsten 3D I mean. You've written several different women into the character who chats with him in the kitchen, but they lack a single style, consistent and persistent, one way of being kittenish, solemn, enraged, jesting, weepy, etc. which is HER and no one else. Then too, earlier, she was incompetent enough but not helpless enough to "freeze" as often as you describe each time a reaction is required and ostensibly she can't cope. You haven't known spoiled brats like her well enough. Present some other woman in 3D to prove you can (Marisa is coming on nicely). Or forget "3D" women. All characters have traits sufficient to serve their narratives, more than those are embellishments and empty gestures. No character is ever as intricate as real people..

Otherwise, this story is avoiding mellerdrama wonderfully and deserves the praise it's gotten.

She is a bad mom, woman, wife, and the way you have written her character is on par with any common stripper, whore, politician, but then trying to humanize her is wrong.Sorry you are back peddling she is a villain, think about it logically is there any woman in today's world that could change her spots.... it does not happen with out great suffering and remorse and this character you have so well written about has none of these traits.

Kristen sounds like a damn close description of my first wife. I'd say the man is doing a fantastic job of fleshing out his female character. Keep Reading....

I am really not wanting Kristen and him to get back together.

She does not deserve a second chance.

Seen too much of this in my nieces, nephews and an in- law.

Messed up their own lives rather than being happy and loved by good people.

No matter how sorry she says she is and possible really is, she fucked it all up in the worst way and can never be trusted. I wish them well if he does take her back but I don't want to see it happen. Yes, critics, I realize that this is just a story, I am allowed to have an opinion.