When Becky Met Bryan

Becky put her hand over his mouth.

'I didn't "let" you, Bryan,' she said. 'I wanted you to.'

Bryan took her wrist and removed her hand from his mouth.

'I could love you because you say things like that,' he said.

'I don't need to hear any more.'

Becky kissed him, hard, passionately. After a few seconds, Bryan rolled her onto her back and began making love to her again.

***

Before going to sleep, Bryan calculated the time he needed next morning to shower and get dressed, take Becky back to her place so she could change, and go to work himself. He then set his smartphone alarm thirty minutes before that, put the phone onto the bedside table and spooned with Becky until they went to sleep.

When the alarm went off with a gentle warble, Bryan awoke with Becky still in his arms. That had never happened with a woman before. Bryan didn't mind cuddling, but he needed his own space to be able to fall asleep. Yet he had slept through the whole night holding this woman. The phone continued to warble and Bryan reached across the bed to turn it off.

Becky was still asleep.

Bryan carefully extricated himself and leaned on his elbow to look down at her. Half her hair was strewn across her face, her lips were parted, and there were smudges of mascara on her eyelids. Bryan imagined waking up next to that face every day for the rest of his life and every cell in his body went 'Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes...' He rested his head on his hand and wondered how long he could look at Becky's face before he grew tired of it. In the end, it was his arm that grew tired and he had to sit up and flex his shoulder.

Bryan slipped out of bed and went to brush his teeth. When he returned to bed, Becky was still asleep. He gazed again at her serenely closed eyes, her flushed cheeks and her lips, now closed and slightly swollen from the previous night's kissing. He brushed the hair away from her face and saw the ghost of a smile. He smiled back, lowered his head and gave her a long but light kiss on her closed mouth.

'Mmmmmm...' said Becky, her tongue making a brief appearance. 'Minty fresh...'

Bryan began lifting his head, opening his mouth to say something nice, but Becky took hold of his head and pulled it back down. This time, her mouth opened and Bryan found his own mouth invaded. Becky was a proponent of the unladylike but highly sensual open-mouthed, full-tongued French kiss and as Bryan engaged in the mutual slurping and licking and swallowing, he felt this alone was reason enough to want to marry her. Wait, what did his brain just say? Before Bryan could figure it out, Becky grabbed his hair with two fists.

'God, I love kissing you!' she said.

Bryan was about to say the feeling was mutual, but Becky went right back to snogging him and he decided that what he wanted to say wasn't all that important anyway. But all good things come to an end and eventually Becky stopped kissing and cracked open her eyes. The smudgy mascara put Bryan in mind of a cat which had stuck its head up a chimney and he smiled in adoration. Becky frowned slightly.

'Am I really that beautiful?' she said.

'Are you reading my facial expression?'

'Yes.'

Bryan kissed her.

'Yes, my darling,' he said. 'You are really that beautiful.'

Becky's smile faltered. She looked away.

'What's wrong?' said Bryan.

'Nothing.'

Bryan frowned. He put the palm of his hand on Becky's face, gently turning it back to face him.

'I'd like to propose a rule,' he said.

'A rule?'

'Yes. If I ask you a question and you don't want to answer it, just say, "Bryan, I'm not ready to tell you right now" and I promise to respect that. But don't say "nothing" when there is clearly something.'

Becky's expression went from worried to wonder. Bryan kept his poker face, but he wondered what kind of men she'd had in her life if something that he considered to be common sense moved her like this. Still, if Daniel was typical of her past relationship choices, Bryan would score points simply by not being a gullible idiot.

'Bryan...' she said. 'I don't know what to say.'

'You don't have to say anything. That's kind of the point.'

Becky looked up at him. He meant it. He actually meant what he said. She found herself feeling so much respect for him that it scared her a little. The truth was, when Bryan told her she was beautiful, she had wanted to return the compliment and she couldn't. Bryan had the most interesting, expressive face she had ever seen, but it wasn't beautiful--not in the way that men in her past had been beautiful. She thought of Marco, whose Italian mother had blessed him with gorgeous dark eyes, wavy black hair and almost perfect bone structure. Now he was beautiful. But after making love, she was the one who looked at his face in wonder, whereas Marco's expression was seeded with a kind of smugness. He certainly never looked at Becky the way Bryan looked at her, as though she were a miracle of Nature.

Should she share these thoughts with Bryan? Part of her was dying to. Even though she had only met him last night, Becky felt incredibly close to him. She felt this desire to open her heart and tell him everything, yet was Bryan really a man you could say anything to? The signs were good, but she had been wrong before. And sometimes it was the strongest seeming man who ended up being petty and mean.

She needed more time.

'Bryan, can I propose something myself?'

'Of course.'

'Can we spend today together?'

'Don't you have to go to work?'

'I'll call in sick if you will.'

Bryan looked down at her, wanting to ravish her then and there. His previous girlfriend had always prioritised her career, even cancelling a date if it clashed with last minute stuff at work. The crazy thought of wanting to marry Becky so soon after meeting her was slowly moving towards 'This is a woman in a million. You'd be crazy not to.'

'That's a great idea,' said Bryan, and he kissed her.

***

Becky and Bryan spent the entire day naked, except for a lunchtime interlude when Becky wore one of his sweatshirts and Bryan wore T-shirt and sweatpants. There was a great deal of kissing and lovemaking, but most of the time they talked. Becky found herself telling Bryan about her life, her childhood, and her search for Love. She had met three guys she thought were Mister Right at the time and now she no longer trusted the concept.

'I read this book on dating that had a real impact on me,' she said, as they lay on a duvet on the living room floor. They were surrounded by cushions from the couch and lying in opposite directions, Becky with her left foot planted on Bryan's chest as he massaged her leg.

'What was it called?' said Bryan.

'The Mister Right Fallacy.'

'Good title. Was it written by a man?'

'No! Why d'you say that?'

'Most dating books I've seen written by women are about attracting the perfect partner, not debunking him as a myth.'

'Well, that's precisely why this woman wrote it. There was a whole chapter on why women cling so desperately to the myth of Mister Right.'

'What did she say?'

'Well, there are several reasons, but the big one is the fear of loneliness. Most women really suffer when they're lonely and some of the worst loneliness is when you're actually in a relationship. So fantasies about Mister Right become a kind of coping mechanism.'

'I see.'

Bryan gently put Becky's left leg back onto the duvet and took up her right leg. He put the sole of her foot onto his chest and began massaging her calf.

'Oh, Bryan... this is heaven.'

'So tell me why this book had such an impact on you.'

'Well... oh goodness, um... the main thing I took away from the book is that it was a bad idea to focus on finding the perfect man. The trick was to try and figure out the kind of relationship I wanted. To get that clear in my mind before dating anyone. Do you know what I mean?'

'I think so. To focus on the quality of the relationship rather than the man?'

'Yeah. She said, if you know what you want, you're more likely to attract a man who wants the same thing.'

'Okay.'

'You sound sceptical.'

'Do I?'

Bryan looked surprised. He paused in massaging Becky leg to concentrate on the question. Becky sat up on her elbows to look at him.

'You can disagree with me, you know,' she said.

'I'm neither agreeing nor disagreeing,' said Bryan. 'I'm thinking about it.'

'Okay.'

Becky watched Bryan as he pondered. They lay facing each other so that his lolling cock was just within her reach and with one foot on his chest, he could see right up between her legs. Yet being naked like this felt completely natural. It usually took Becky a few times with a man to be this comfortable, yet with Bryan it was no problem. After lunch, without a second thought, she had pulled off the sweatshirt, opened her legs and asked Bryan if he was still hungry. Becky felt her face go red at the memory. She put her hand idly between her legs, mostly out of curiosity, and her finger came out wet. She and Bryan stared at it.

'You're kidding me!' said Bryan.

'You're one to talk.'

Becky nodded at a penis that had gone from lolling to fully erect in under three seconds. Bryan looked at it in disbelief.

'What is this?' he said.

Becky shrugged and removed her foot from his chest. She positioned herself, feet apart, and was clearly expecting Bryan to climb onto her. He frowned.

'I was about to say something,' he said.

'You can't multitask?'

Becky's sly grin and shameless posture proved irresistible. Bryan climbed onto her, thinking how unsensual it was to fuck simply because one's sex organs had got aroused. But the moment he slid his erect cock into Becky, he didn't give a shit about sensuality. My god, he loved Becky's cunt and, within seconds, he felt an orgasm approaching. This would be his seventh.

'I don't believe it,' he said as he fucked Becky. 'I'm going to come.'

'Well, you know what to do,' said Becky.

Bryan pushed in hard and ejaculated. There was barely any semen left, but it still felt pretty damn good. Becky was silently laughing as he came and Bryan felt like laughing too. His body's sex drive really was like a horny dog that just wanted pussy and didn't care whether the woman came or not. And now Becky knew it too. His guilty secret was out. The orgasm was over quickly and Bryan stayed inside her, feeling the woman's arms and legs surrounding him. He loved it here, being enveloped by 'Woman'. Becky's hand moved on his neck.

'What are you thinking?' she said.

'I'm not thinking anything,' he mumbled. 'I'm just enjoying the feel of your... your body.'

'You wanted to say "pussy", didn't you?'

Bryan hesitated. She was almost right. And he was about to say that, when he felt her mouth by his ear. When she spoke, her breath seemed to penetrate his soul.

'Bryan...' she whispered. 'Did you want to say "cunt"?'

Bryan's cock stiffened and he heard Becky make a small sound in response. Shit, yet another guilty secret exposed. This woman's body was like a lie detector, dragging every sordid little secret out of him. Yet Bryan wanted her to do it, wanted to be totally naked, totally exposed in her presence. He suddenly felt the urge to abase himself before this goddess, to lie on his back so she could crouch over him and urinate on his face. His cock stiffened again and Bryan felt so shocked at his own desires that he lifted himself up and looked down at Becky in a kind of ecstatic despair.

'What are you doing to me?' he said.

Becky looked up at him. It was a strange look, as though she knew exactly what was going on and yet was puzzled at the same time.

'You're upset,' she said simply.

Bryan's first impulse was to deny it. Yet the moment he had the thought, he knew that Becky would instantly feel the dishonesty, rendering their physical intimacy meaningless. He suddenly realised that it wasn't Becky's cunt he wanted to feel... it was her desire.

'I am upset,' he said. 'But not with you. With women.'

'Why?'

'Do you have you any idea how angry women get when I use the word "cunt"? How many looks of contempt I've got because it turns me on? "I refuse to use that ugly word, you misogynist!" And "cunt" is just the tip of the iceberg.'

Bryan brushed hair from Becky's forehead and looked her in the eye.

'I honestly want to be a good man,' he said. 'And I honestly want to treat you with respect. But at the same time... I want to do things to you. Things I'm afraid to even talk about. Partly because so many women have told me I should be ashamed of myself, but also because I don't want to offend you. I truly don't.'

Becky reached up and touched Bryan's face.

'Bryan,' she said. 'I'm so happy you trust me enough to tell me this. And, in some ways, I'm in the same boat.'

'In what ways?'

'I secretly love the idea of being a slut. I love that we fucked on the night we met. But I'm also dreading the moment it becomes public knowledge.'

'Becky, if you want to keep this between us--'

'For goodness sake, Bryan! Everyone at your office is going to know why you took a day off! And Daniel will do his nut when I tell him what happened, and he's certainly not going to keep it to himself. The first time he took me out to dinner, I gave him a big speech about how I needed to get to know a man before I could do anything with him. I feel pretty stupid right now.'

Becky hooked her heels around Bryan's upper legs and flexed. Bryan felt as though she was locking his cock inside her.

'But you know what?' she said. 'I don't feel the least bit guilty. I need this. I want this. And the only thing which might spoil it is you telling me this is a one-night stand. Are you going to do that?'

'No,' said Bryan.

'Good. Now kiss me.'

***

It was getting dark outside when they finally decided it was time to get dressed. Bryan put on jeans and a fresh cotton shirt, but Becky had to wear the same blue dress she had worn the previous night. It made her feel like the entire day had been a dream and now she was returning to dull reality. It was not a nice feeling. Becky walked out of the bedroom and went to look for Bryan. He was in the kitchen, the electric kettle rumbling, two mugs on the kitchen counter. She went up and fell against his chest, like a child coming off a scary ride at the fair. Bryan enveloped her in a big, masculine hug.

'I don't want to go,' she said. 'Every bone in my body is screaming at me to stay.'

'I feel it too. I feel it too.'

'Oh, Bryan, what are we going to do?'

'I'm going to make us tea,' he said. 'Then we're going to sit at the dining table and discuss the next step.'

'Do you have a plan?'

'I do.'

'I love a man with a plan!'

The two hugged until the kettle boiled and the button popped out. Becky let Bryan go, heartened by his practicality, and she watched him make the tea. She followed him into the living room area and took a chair next to his at the dining table, turning it at an angle so their legs could touch while they talked. They watched each other drink tea, unable to stop smiling.

'All right,' said Bryan, lowering his mug. 'To business.'

Becky lowered her mug and gave the man her undivided attention.

'First, I want to tell you where I stand,' he said. 'I'm in love with you, Becky. When I woke up this morning and saw your sleeping face next to me, I knew I wanted to wake up next to that face for the rest of my life.'

Becky could not restrain herself. Pausing only to put her mug on the table, she virtually leapt onto Bryan's lap and hugged him so tight, he heard her elbow joint crack.

'I'm so happy to hear that!' she said. 'So happy! Oh, Bryan, you have no idea how wonderful that makes me feel!'

Bryan hugged the woman close, enjoying the feel of his arms around her body, the gorgeous smell of her hair mixing with the sweet sadness of his sinking heart. He was acutely aware that Becky had avoided saying 'I love you too' and he knew what that meant. She loved that he was in love with her, she was thrilled and excited... but that was it. He remembered a short story in which a woman walked away from a man precisely because the night of passion had been so good, and she didn't want to lose the memory of it by risking a relationship that would probably end up in the usual familiarity. Still, right now Becky was beautiful and happy, so he was going to enjoy this story while it lasted.

'This is crazy!' said Becky. 'We've barely known each other twenty-four hours! But I feel like I've known you forever.'

Bryan smiled but said nothing. Becky didn't seem to notice any change of mood.

'So what's your plan, Bryan?' she said excitedly.

'There are two ways forward that I can see,' he said. 'The first is that we decide to be in a relationship and see how it goes.'

'Sounds good. What's the other way?'

'I ask you to marry me and you move in at the weekend.'

Bryan felt Becky's entire body freeze. Suddenly, she was a dead weight and Bryan's heart seemed to collapse as his worst fears were confirmed. He lifted Becky carefully back onto her chair and sat back on his. She stared at Bryan as he crossed his legs and took a sip of tea.

'Bryan, don't joke about this.'

'I'm not joking.'

Becky blinked and shook her head as though a fly had buzzed her.

'You can't possibly expect me to say yes?' she said.

'I'm not expecting anything,' said Bryan. 'I'm simply telling you where I stand.'

'You want to marry me?'

'Yes.'

'After just one day?'

'Yes.'

'Bryan, that is fucking nuts!'

Bryan sipped his tea and pondered. Was she right? Possibly. But the more serious question was whether he was saying this to provoke a reaction or whether he actually meant it. Becky scowled and picked up her own mug of tea, as though wanting to show that she too could act all calm and collected. Bryan frowned.

'There was this feature in a Sunday magazine I used to like reading,' he said. 'Every week there would be a true-life love story from a reader and there was one which really stuck in my head. It was sent in by a woman who'd decided when she was thirty to look for a serious relationship with a view to marriage and children. She joined a dating agency--this was in the days before internet dating--and after a number of disappointments, they eventually matched her up with a man with whom she felt a real click. He felt the same way about her and after two dates, she thought things were heading in the right direction. But then, on the third date, the man had some news. His company had offered him the directorship of one of their affiliates in the Far East, somewhere like Thailand or Singapore. The job was too good to turn down, so he offered this woman a choice: They end the relationship right now or they get married and she goes with him. Oh, and he needed to know by the end of the week because of the time it would take to get the marriage certificate and apply for visas and resident permits.

'Well, she decided to go. She gave up her job, her home, her whole life here and went with her new husband to the Far East. They ended up having three children who got educated at international schools and she was essentially an expat housewife and mother. And after twenty years of marriage, she wrote in to this magazine to say that it was the best decision of her life.'

Bryan finished his tea and put the empty mug on the table.

'I want to be that man,' he said. 'And I want to marry a woman who wants to be my wife. And if you feel, deep down, that it's not what you want, then fair enough. I completely understand. The last thing I want is to talk a woman into a marriage that would make her unhappy.'