White Fire: the Romance

Cara felt the need to confess, but was not sure what to confess. She sniffled, thinking about telling him the truth of what she was, but when she opened her mouth, something entirely different came out. "Lavada I..I've loved you since the very first time we met, in the library of Colaste-inasha."

He blinked, then pulled her into his arms, silently stroked her hair and let her cry on his shoulder. When her sobbing and sniffling subsided, he spoke softly, and with irony. "You have an interesting way of showing it. Until...recently...I thought you hated me." Cara simply shrugged. She held him tightly, breathing deeply, trying to settle herself. She was beginning to feel embarrassed about her display- and awkward that he had not had a similar confession for her.

Both were silent a long time, then he lay her down, studying her by the light of dawn. He kissed her gently, caressed her; once again she rose to his seduction and they made love, longer and slower than before. After ward she stood quickly, ignoring the aching of her body. She dressed and left the room, and he made no move to stop her.

She intended to go about her usual routine, but once outside, she walked straight into the forest, far enough away she was sure he would not find her. Escape was what she needed, so she transformed to her other self. She took to the air, found a river to bathe in, a wild deer to eat. She spent her day not as Aelithian nor as Selianes, but as a beast, not thinking, just acting. She did not return until long after dark, and she expected that he'd be gone- but there was a light in the cottage. She steeled herself and went inside.

He was sitting at the table, an open book before him, his face carved of stone. He did not even look up when she came in. "Where were you?" he asked flatly.

"I had matters to attend to," she replied coldly.

"I asked for you in the village. No one had seen you." His tone had an accusing edge to it.

"I wasn't in the village," she said carelessly. She planted her feet and crossed her arms before herself defensively.

He looked at her at last. "Obviously. Why did you leave? Why didn't you say anything?"

She shrugged. "What was there to say?"

"You could have told me where you were going, or at least not to expect you back." He stood and came toward her, looked into her eyes, searching, accusing, pleading.

She looked down. "I did not know I was going until I got out there." she confessed, then set her mouth, determined not to apologize or to say more.

"I was worried, Cara." He said softly.

She glanced at him, then moved past him. "I thought you would have been gone by now, anyway."

He caught her arm. "What do you mean by that?"

She swallowed, thought about choosing her words carefully, but finally just let it out. "Things can't have turned out how you wanted. I mean, did you not expect to simply have your fun then continue on your Quest? But then, the silly foundling fell in love with you." She snarled.

He sighed. "Sithecara, you idiot." She spun around to slap him, to scream in his face, but he caught her hand, pulled her close, looked her directly in the eyes. Something there stopped her, a gentleness she never expected. "I've been looking for you all these years."

She trembled, her knees buckled. "What?"

He led her to the table and sat her down, sat across from her. He held her hands in his, stared into her eyes. "Let me explain everything, and don't interrupt. You can argue with me after if you must, but let me explain." She nodded, dumbfounded. "I can't say I loved you the first time I laid eyes on you, but you struck me. When I saw you sitting in that window, at first I thought you must be Selianes, the way you were glowing in the sunlight. Honestly I wasn't convinced you weren't even when I was closer to you...you're so perfectly beautiful." He smiled at the memory, then continued. "Still, I was confused at best. I thought about you often, but tried to just let it go. Especially since every time I saw you, you would pick a fight. You still pick fights, it's maddening." He shushed her before she could respond. She frowned, but kept silent. "The day I was named Taniste, at the ceremony, I thought long and hard about my duties. The first of which being to find my true partner, of course. You were in my thoughts that day, all day. I thought at first it was just that Seaphen Athar performed the ceremony...but you stayed in my thoughts." He paused, looking thoughtful. Cara found herself wondering what he had been thinking back then, and blushed.

He laughed. "Yes, Tlexepa, not all my thoughts were pure, but to be honest not all of them were kind, either. Anyway, I began to think after a day or two that perhaps my sudden renewed preoccupation with you was a sign I should find you. So I asked the only man I knew who had a shared experience with me. I told my Father about you, asked him if he'd had visions of Mother. It did not go well, to say we argued is an understatement of the highest order.

"I decided to go to some one wiser, more holy. Seaphen Athar encouraged me to defy my Father and find you. I was almost convinced then...but later that night I had an encounter that made up my mind. At the vausilica, I saw a true Selianes- don't laugh- then I knew." He looked into her eyes then. "Now I've found you, the challenge begins, I think."

Cara waited for him to continue, and when he didn't, she cleared her throat. "What challenge?" she asked meekly.

He moved around the table, knelt beside her. "To convince you to stop arguing with me and marry me."

She stared at him, then looked away. "I would never laugh at you for saying you met a Selianes, Lavada. I know you did."

He blinked. "How could you know? Did Athar tell you?"

She twitched. "You told Athar?"

"Yes, of course. He said it was absolute proof I should seek you, though I did not need him to say it by then." Lavada shifted. Cara stood him up, standing with him.

"Well, let me confess something to you...my love," Her voice shook to call him that, "Then we shall see if you still want to marry me." She looked at him searchingly. He seemed to be bracing himself for another fight. "I feel like such a liar, please forgive me. Believe me I had no idea about any of it...but...I'm not truly a sorceress, Lavada. I am Selianes, you're instinct about me was right." she paused, lowered her head. He kept quiet, still, waiting for an explanation.

"It isn't all a lie I guess, I was born in Aelith, but I don't know why. I grew up like any Aelithian, I didn't even know how different I was until I was seven. Morgan witnessed my, um, birth. All the older priests knew. I have never seen or spoken to any other Selianessai, though. I don't even know how." She paused to catch her breath.

"So, that was the reason they were so secretive about you? Not that you were Piresa?" He asked softly.

She shrugged. "Either way I am, aren't I? My parents left me on that altar, what does it matter if they were mortal or divine?"

He thought about this a moment, then said. "I suppose so. How did they know, though? You are beautiful, yes, I know I've always said that, but how did they know you were not Aelithian?"

Cara looked at him, trying to discern if he truly believed or if he was humoring her. His face was hard to read, but he seemed to be calculating, and at least he was listening. "Like I said, Morgan witnessed my birth. I was not born in the usual sense, though, Lavada. She said I just came into being, and infant full-formed, from Stralis in the air. She said all Seven colors were represented in my making. Besides that, I've used magic my whole life, it just comes easily. When I was little, Morgan and Athar had to tell me when I was using magic, I didn't know the difference. That's why they kept me apart. People somehow knew I was not like everyone else. I resented it once, but since living here I see, no matter how hard I try to seem like anyone else, the truth shows through."

He nodded slowly. "Tell me about when you disappeared, Tlexepa. Athar wouldn't admit at first he didn't know where you were, but when I told him I thought you were my Taniste, he confessed you'd left."

"I started having visions of flying before I met you. Remember that little pool you found me at so many times? I was there trying to...to change, trying to learn to fly." She paused, then decided to tell the truth. "After our last fight, back then, I was so hurt and angry, I guess I just wanted to leave so bad, I finally was able to change." She looked up at him, asking him with her eyes to believe her. "I was homesick, so I came back. I did not know it was you on the roof of the vausilica...and I was only trying to help. I didn't know what your dilemma was, but you seemed like you wanted to talk, so I listened. I felt awful, please believe me..but I was also so glad you didn't recognize me. I was afraid you would somehow."

He looked pale. "That was you?"

"Yes, I'm sorry, I didn't have a message from the Seven, I didn't even know what you were talking about, I was just trying to make you feel better, and I wanted to see you up close that last time..."

He turned away quickly. She slumped into the chair, convinced that now he truly would leave. For a long time he paced back and forth, then he laughed sharply. "I described you, Tlexepa. Athar knew it was you, didn't he?"

Cara bit her lip and nodded slowly.

Lavada shook his head, grinning. "Well, I think you're wrong. You're Selianes, but you know nothing about what you are, correct? How do you know you did not bring a message from the Seven that day? I'm sure they do not just send missives like mortal lords do, Tlexepa. It is poetry, to use you to deliver their will about our destinies, neither of us even knowing what was truly happening."

She stared at him for a long time, thinking over what he said. Then as one they laughed, embraced, shared a tender kiss. "I love you," she whispered.

"Then marry me, my love," he whispered. She nodded. He picked her up and carried her to their bed.

Of course no one in the village was surprised by the news, and many felt quite vindicated. A few of the young women sighed, both at their 'lost chance' with the handsome Taniste, and the romance of what they had witnessed. Cara did not want to leave right away. Lavada was willing to stay until she could find a suitable replacement, and they could sort out enough details between them to present a unified front to any who might challenge their marriage. They took long walks, told stories of their childhoods, and about the years since they had seen each other last. They continued to fight daily, and to make love nightly.

Cara stood chopping the onions and carrots at one end of the table. She set it aside a moment to stoke the fire up again so the water would boil. Lavada sat at the other end of the table, watching her absently. He had been monologuing about all the things she'd need to know when she met his parents, but had slipped into silent thought. Cara eyed him, her aggravation growing. "Don't just sit there, stoke the fire or something." She grumbled.

He blinked and looked at her, then at the fire. "What? I don't stoke fires."

Cara turned, planted her hands on her hips. "I noticed! You don't do anything, except let me wait on you hand and foot. Interesting way to show me I'm an equal now." Her voice grew louder and higher with pent-up frustration.

Lavada stared at her a few moments, then smiled slowly. "Cara, you don't have to do those things, I don't make you do it."

"Some one has to do it." She took the knife again and hacked at the vegetables savagely.

"No, no one does. You could accomplish all these tasks easily with magic. Conjure spectral servants to do it." He insisted.

"You can't use magic to solve all your problems." She gave him a hard look, speaking barely loud enough to be heard.

"No, Tlexepa, I can't, but you can. You're Selianes! You should use magic to solve all your problems. How do you expect anyone to believe in you if you still pretend to be mortal?" He came close to her, took her by the shoulders and met her eyes to impress on her the importance of his words.

She stared at him with wide eyes. "No, Lavada, no! No one needs to believe I'm Selianes, they don't need to know!" She shook her head violently, torn between fleeing him, and throwing herself in his arms to escape his suggestion.

"Of course they'll know! Or do you expect me to convince my father to let me marry you thinking you're just a mortal Piresa?"

"I expect you to convince him to let you marry me, or we'll do it anyway- the Faith will give sanction if we're truly right." She took his face in her hands and met his eyes.

He leaned closer to her. "Cara, Sithecara, you're a Selianes Dur-era, it's not a shameful thing, you're beyond worthy to marry even by my father's standards. Why make it difficult? Don't be ashamed of who you are..."

"I'm not ashamed-" she objected, but he went on.

"All of Aelith should know, they have a right to know, that the Seven have sent one of their own to be Taniste. Why hide the truth? Everyone will see we're meant for each other."