With a Little Help From my Friends

"Let's look at the situation. We went out for a nice dinner with friends. A famous athlete told you he was willing to fuck you if you could sneak away from your husband, which you did. He proceeded to fuck the living shit out of you all night, giving you who knows how man orgasms and the best sex of your life.

"Meanwhile, I was tossed under the bus, left holding the bag and completely fucked, metaphorically speaking, of course. The eight people we were with knew you left me to get fucked; fucked much better than I ever could. Explain to me how that wasn't childish, selfish, and as is now quite evident, self destructive?"

"I was just trying to have a good time, one fling in a lifelong monogamous relationship," insisted Linda. "You wrote and posted that shit to hurt me. I wasn't trying to hurt you."

"You keep saying that. Maybe you believe it, but it's a crock of shit," I replied as I considered Linda's words. "You knew I'd be humiliated. You admitted as much when you told me you were surprised at how well I was taking your night long fuck-fest. You anticipated me being very upset, yet you made the choice to fuck that asshole anyway.

"You claim I'm hurting you on purpose, but the pain you caused me was simply collateral damage. It was unavoidable if you were going to experience his big cock. Now you think I should not make any choices that cause you pain, simply because... I just realized I have no idea why you think I would consider your feelings in this."

"I'm your wife! You're supposed to protect me, take care of me. What you're doing is hurting me," replied Linda with a whine.

"You expect me to carry out my husbandly duties after you discarded your wifely obligations? You have the nerve to try to take the high ground?" I demanded angrily. "It may not seem like it, but I'm doing this for us. It's the only chance we have of staying together."

"Are you crazy? You're making me hate you. How could your cruel words and actions make me want to stay with you even one more night?"

Rather than respond, I headed upstairs to bed. I wanted to be sure she couldn't lock me out of my bedroom. I wasn't in the mood for symbolic gestures.

The next night after work was less confrontational. "I made an appointment with our doctor today to get the blood tests. That seems to be the one thing everyone who makes a comment on your page agrees on. I realize now that I should have made Marc wear a condom."

Realizing she still didn't get it, I silently went and changed my clothes. I spent a few minutes on Facebook before being called to dinner. I was cleaning up the dishes when Linda stomped into the kitchen.

"You want me to get a pregnancy test? I told you I was probably safe. I'm certain I was," stated Linda emphatically. "Posting that comment was just being petty and spiteful. You really are an ass."

My work environment was miserable as one might expect. When a man shows a weakness around other men, they close on him like a pack of wolves. I was the constant butt of jokes and nasty comments. It was a real test of my discipline and determination to make it through the work day. It seemed to get a little worse every day.

The next night when I came through the door, Linda was waiting for me. "I managed to get a doctor's appointment for this morning. I had all the tests done, including pregnancy, although I'm sure I'm not pregnant. It was pretty embarrassing. The doctor and his staff all knew why I needed the tests. They never said anything to my face, but I heard snickers and giggles in the hallway.

"It'll take a few days for the results. I need to ask you a favor. If Marc did give me a disease, or get me pregnant, could you please not post it? He's not really a bad guy and it would embarrass both of us."

I looked at her like she had two heads before I turned and walked away. She was still claiming the fucker was a nice guy. Nice guys don't fuck married women. It's called a fucking deal breaker.

Once the kids were done eating, I produced some swabs and told the kids to open their mouths. As I swabbed them, Linda suddenly realized what I was doing.

"Jim! They're yours. You don't need to test them. I read that suggestion by that damn Harry. He was never your friend before this problem came up. Don't listen to him now," pleaded Linda.

"It's pretty important to me that I'm certain they're mine," I answered icily. The kids looked and acted enough like me that I had no doubt about their paternity, but I still felt like Linda didn't get it. She hadn't come to terms with the severity of her actions. She was in denial, blaming the ensuing shitstorm on me, but never admitting making a bad decision and never thinking ill of her football player.

Friday was a particularly bad day at work. The guys were trying to get in the mood for the weekend by hammering away at me. I did sense that some of them were tiring of the way I was treated, but they were in the minority.

"It's getting hard to get my work done," admitted Linda once she put the kids in bed and returned to the kitchen. "Men keep suggesting we sneak away for a blowjob or a quick fuck. Why do they think I'd even give them the time of day? At least Marc is famous, rich and good looking, but he was a mistake. I see that now.

"Would you be willing to just hold me tonight? I don't expect you to want anything more, especially before my test results come back, but we've been fighting all week and I'm tired of it. We never went to bed mad, at least not before I went to bed with that jerk. I miss my husband."

I held Linda until she fell asleep that night. It wasn't easy for me. Every time I thought of touching her breasts or hips, I saw Marc Fucking LaValliere playing with her tits and feeding her his cum. It was all I could do not to choke her as she slept.

It was a relatively quiet weekend. I did some chores, played with the kids and caught up on lost sleep. Linda did pretty much the same thing. I was torn apart seeing Linda and not feeling the desire to touch and hold her. I knew I still loved her, but the disrespect she demonstrated toward me was simply too great.

Monday was more of the same at work, but I had built up my defenses and didn't allow it to bother me much. Bullying requires a victim who responds in a certain way and I refused to be that victim. The pleasure of riding my ass was diminishing, as I knew it would.

That evening, there was a knock on the door just after dinner. Linda was putting the kids in bed, so I was alone when I answered it. A man in a suit with a briefcase stood waiting for me to ask him in. I motioned with my head for him to follow me to the kitchen.

"Mr. Bennett? I'm William Morris. I represent 'Helping Hands', a local charity which helps kids in broken homes pay for school necessities."

"You're soliciting?" I asked in amazement. "You look more like a lawyer than a solicitor. Get it? A lawyer, not a solicitor?"

"It was very funny the first time I heard it, about 30 years ago. I am a lawyer. I'm here to offer you a substantial payment to stop your negative references of Marc LaValliere in print, over the internet, or anywhere else."

"You want to give me money to stop mentioning what an asshole your asshole client is? Is all the negative publicity affecting your fund raising?" I asked with no attempt to hide my grin.

"That and the email you sent to our sponsors, clients and directors," admitted the barrister. "You've hampered our efforts more than I care to say. I'm here to offer you ten thousand dollars to cease and desist. Does that interest you?"

"Not much," was my reply. "Your fucking client used his fame, wealth and good looks to seduce my wife, thereby turning our lives into living hells.

"Linda was the best wife, lover and friend a man could ever have. She's a great mother, a loyal friend and was a respected member of the community. Your client deliberately lured her to his bed with no interest or concern for her feelings, her family, or her position in the community.

"I felt like the luckiest man in the world every day we were together until your client, the fucking snake, slithered into our garden. Ten thousand dollars doesn't mean shit to me. I'd rather have my wife's fidelity than any amount of money, but that prick ruined that. You go back to that motherfucker and tell him I'll never mention him again, plus I won't name him in a suit for child support for the next 21 years or so, if I get a million bucks in my account by the weekend."

"That's ridiculous!" replied the lawyer immediately. "I'm authorized to go as high as twenty-five thousand."

"Well fuck you and the horse you rode in on," I stated with a snarl. "My wife's virtue was priceless, and your offer is an insult. It's two million, now, and I need it by the end of the week or you'll be reading about how I'm going to raise LaValliere's son to play for the fucking Patriots! Now get the hell out. I don't want to see you again unless you have the money in your hand!"

I ushered the sputtering man out the door and slammed it. Linda walked up to me as I turned around.

"I heard that entire thing. I really fucked up, didn't I? I had the best husband a woman could ever want and I pissed it away for a fantasy. His cock wasn't any bigger than yours. He refused to eat my pussy and he forced me to swallow his cum. It wasn't the night of incredible sex I tried to tell myself it was. I made a huge mistake, but I couldn't admit it, not even to myself.

"I'd rather have back my life with you than be with that asshole. I'm so sorry, Jim. I was wrong to disrespect and embarrass you. I just pray you don't divorce me, but I won't blame you if you do."

"That was a long time coming," I told Linda as I opened the refrigerator and pulled out a beer. "I won't make any promises about not divorcing you. You sure deserve it. Let's see how I feel in a week or two."

I received a call from Morris on Thursday. "My Bennett, my client is a charitable organization. As a member of this community, can we appeal to you to drop your extravagant request? Think of the children we won't be able to help if we were to yield to your demands."

"Did I look like I just came in on a load of fucking pumpkins?" I shouted into the phone. "I Googled you bastards. As near as I can tell your charity only helps a few kids. Over ninety percent of your budget goes for expenses, like huge salaries, vacations, conventions and promotions.

"If you want me to let that slimy bastard off the hook, cough up the two million before the banks close tomorrow. If you contact me again, for any reason but the wiring instructions, the price will go up another million. Charity, my ass!"

Friday afternoon I received a call from Morris telling me the money had been wired. I immediately logged into my account and saw a deposit of two million dollars! That shit sandwich LaValliere had served up was tasting a little better!

Linda was making dinner and the kids were playing in the living room when I got home that evening.

"Tomorrow, we're putting the house on the market," I announced. "I don't want to live here anymore."

"Where will I go?" asked a very subdued Linda. "What about the kids? Are you taking them away from me?"

"I was thinking someplace warmer, maybe Hawaii or Florida," I responded with a smile. "The kids will be going with us."

"What about our jobs? We don't have much equity in the house. How will we live, pay rent and buy food?" asked Linda. "It's not that I don't want to move away from here, but we have to be practical."

"We're going to start over. We have enough money to last until we get new jobs and find a nice house. LaValliere has managed to soothe my ruffled feathers to the tune of two million bucks.

"If you ever, ever pull a stunt like that again, you'll be picking shit with the chickens," I warned. "We were lucky this time, but I'm still pissed at you big time. Every piece of ass torn off you belongs to me. It isn't to be traded, loaned, borrowed or bought. Is that clear?"

"Very clear," responded Linda. "I guess my news doesn't compare to yours. My tests came back. I'm clean, not pregnant and horny as hell. Can you find it in your heart to give me a mercy fuck? You're being offered a two million dollar piece of ass just for the taking."

"Don't kid yourself," I replied. "It's a ten grand piece of ass. My marketing and negotiating skills made us the big bucks. You need to realize I'm going to be miserable to live with for awhile. Getting over your betrayal is going to take time. If I ever even suspect you're stepping out on me, I'll go nuclear."

"Don't worry, Jim. I learned my lesson. It was a hard one, but I always heard the hard lessons are the best ones. I want only to love and be loved by you. I'm ready to start over with you. It'll be an adventure."

"Will you miss your friends if we move a thousand miles or more?" I asked.

"My friends? They had me fooled," added Linda with a snort. "At the moment, you're the only friend I have. Now that I think about it, you're really the only true friend I've ever had, or need. I have one request. Please don't ever go back on Face Book."