by JAScooter
The characters are kind of interesting, but they are drawn too broadly. Everything is in done in extremes, the emotions are too exaggerated, too overly reactive. After a bit, I get frustrated with their actions and just want to get to the end of the story and be done with it.
I think it would be a better story if the characters had been moderated a bit, but of course, thats just an opinion.
I like the fact that you brought the Bet back into the mix of the story. It creates several opportunities for the personalities of the characters to be expressed in a variety of ways. Once again it shows what happens in a relationship where the communication is somewhat lacking in quality and effectiveness. Looking forward to the next chapter.
The characters are too extreme in their emotions to be credible and frankly it is getting boring now, it's like a ship without a ruder drifting around aimlessly
If Jennifer had the head that her qualifications demand,
she would know exactly what was going on his head all the
time. Either she got the job on false reccomendations and
diploma, or she is in truth a sadist who like torturing
poor little boys! Peter constantly sounds more like a 16 year old than a captain of industry and master of his Fate.
The story is dragging on too long. It seems lost and heading in no direction. Reads almost like a soap opera. Get on with it and define a direction the story is going to take and not be repititive.
it seems to me that she's some kind of robot who can change her emotions with the switch of a button...
ice princess, switch, loving girlfriend, switch, angry, switch.....
this story makes no sense at all to me anymore, the characters are all stupid morons and to top it off inspite of all the drama it's boring. i don't get how anyone can give this 100 but lucky you because i unlike you have one story less to look forward to on lit. i am definitely not going to read this bullshit anymore!