All Comments on 'Worlds Apart Pt. 02'

Not sure about this one. Yeah it fits the world very well and concept of interspecies children is great. But...

From the very start of the story i think i knew what will be the outcome. There are no antagonists here. Its like ... something is missing for me that all other books had. This builds the world more and i like it very much ... but maybe its just not rly for me? Also it might be that make hero here does not suit me well. Hes in situation where he decides to go for children when he is clearly in situation where he cant rly afford them. Im all in for strong female and even dominating characters. But here ... again not my boat?

Long, but excellent.

A good continuation of the story with five more possible story lines if you have that much energy.

Once again Snekguy, a great story. As a parent, this one warms my heart. I'm glad to read about the more mundane trials that we all face in everyday life.

Thanks,

RedHector

I think the story was well thought out and executed. The antagonist was self doubt and doing something important that hadn't been done before. Much like life as we know it here in what we call the real world. It would be so interesting to see what kind of story arc this could follow. Imagine what the lives of what these 5 young cubs will be?

Good science fiction is where the spacecraft are just background for the story.

-Glenn A. Larson

GOOD STORY WHAT'S NEXT.

Yep this one is my fav, world apart was always that special story because it was the one that intruded me to you universe since then I’ve read all of them even one I wouldn’t normally for the lore, at first I didn’t understand why it was so long...then I did...oh got the second part with the kids and there personality broke me and I ship the hell out of Hazel and sammy it just like Jamie and liz...I hope they stay together

And those fan of the bug stories with that planet bug one being my fourth fav it was a dream to see how it all developed...including some romances that was still going on found that cute

I would love to see a story about a guy in a dead end job or part of his life and he take the risk and goes to that planet a new breath of life and see the planet from his POV...maybe ever find a bug lady friend to romance i just love the world and the ref and WALKER! And holly! And Harry and black jack who always cheats it funny It so cool seeing them

This story was everything I want in a squeal...and the aquarium broke the hell out of me I gasped for god sake woke half the house but still it was worth it one of the most wholesome stories you’ve ever written I’m hyped for what next

This was another great story and I look forward to the next one. Thanks

That was adorable. This story spanned ~5 years or so? That's enough time for word to get around, especially with the Jarilans using it for positive media coverage. It would be interesting to see how the other mixed couples react to the possibility of kids.

For some reason, thats what came to mind when the 3 kitten carrier was first described. I was not expecting 40 pages but i am glad i read every single one.

I've been reading your stories for ages and *onions* *onions* not crying, just so good, *onions* *onions* this series has been so good, another round of chapters would be welcome.

Ah yes, this is the one I've been eagerly waiting for. Finally, the xeno-compatibility has happened and is now canon. This chapter of the universe was as adorable and fluffy as I expected it to be.

Now we just need to see how inter-species reproduction works between a man and a flock of Valbarans. Can't imagine how six pregnant females would be under one house.

Oh yes, what wonderful World's you create. I was so excited when you added this chapter, I had to go back to re-read chapter 1, and I'm so glad I did. Five Stars just ain't enough. Thank you for this.

This might be might favorite of your stories. Part one was my introduction to your writing, and this was an amazing payoff to that story. Keep it up!

Enjoying this as I enjoy all of your Coalition stories but one thing that is seriously messing with me is all the incorrect usage of the word "nonplussed." It doesn't mean nonchalant or unfazed by an unusual situation as you're using it; if anything it means the opposite, as in someone who is nonplussed is so totally bewildered and confused that they don't know how to act or react. I know it's kind of a meaningless gripe but your stories are so wonderfully immersive that I get slightly nonplussed whenever little incoherencies like this take me out of your world and kick me back into mine.

"I can't believe her first word is no," Jamie chuckled"... said the first-time parents...

Such a cute story. Thank you for sharing your Art with us!

Loved it, I was very excited to see that you had put this up and read it all in one sitting and was not disappointed. Side not the description of mannerisms for the doctor caste Jarilans made me think of Mordin Solus from Mass Effect and that made me laugh.

Enjoyed every word of your detailed story

It was rich in every detail

Thank you

This was such a rich and wonderful story!

This is the one of the best story of the whole Pinwheel universe...

The universe you created is impressive. I anxiously await more additions to your series

MAYBE THE FIRST STEP IN SEEING HER SIDE IS TO VISIT THE PINWHEEL AND THEY MEET RAZ AND STANLEY AND RAZ CAN HELP KIDS OUT.

I stumbled upon this story, sci-Fi isn’t usually my thing, but it was beautifully written and a lovely story, thank you

Truly well done! Reminiscent of Heinlein, a little of Laumer's Retief, and a lot of just plain good writing! I'm happy to have found these stories, and plan to support this author on the suggested site. Thank you for sharing your talent!

It looks like you guys have won me a second monthly competition, which was a wonderful surprise to wake up to, and the two highest-rated stories in the sci-fi category are now Rask Rebellion and Worlds Apart 2. I'd like to thank you all for reading, and for voting on the story, I'm really glad you guys enjoyed this one so much. I feel like you're always rewarding me for sharing my work here.

@MrKnightlyWriter

I would like to explore Jarilo more in the future, yeah. A story where someone who is down on their luck moves there to start fresh would be fun to write.

@Anonymous

My bad, I will replace the uses of 'nonplussed' in a future edit. This one may be coming to retail relatively soon, assuming that I can get a cover for it, so I'll be sure to update the Literotica version when that happens.

@TLB1981

Next up is a story called Longhunter, which is set in a fantasy reimagining of Colonial America. It will feature Wendigos, deer girls, and lots of musket shootouts.

After that, I'm working on the next Pinwheel story, The Autumn War, which will feature the Coalition trying to recapture the lost Valbaran colony of Kerguela. There's already some impressive concept art for the new Bug units and the next generation Valbaran ships up on my website.

I'm actually running a competition on my Patreon right now where you can make custom Valbaran ships using modules that I have provided, and the winners will have their ship designs included in the opening fleet battle. We did a thing where the ships are made up of interchangeable segments that can be mixed and matched in image editing programs.

After that, I'm writing a story focused on the Brokers, and their concept art is almost complete. I hope you like calamari.

Love the story couldn't put it down Read it in one day Would love seen pictures of Liz and kittens in the story

Worlds Apart set me on a reading binge of your pinwheel works. After reading through the series I finally realize how important this story is to the universe you're creating. The genetic engineering brought to the table by the Jarilans, not to mention their biotechnology, has the ability to bring a real sense of unity to the collation and to make a lot of people happy. And it has the possibility of making a lot of humans fearful. For example, how will Sleethe react when/if he learns the Jarilans can prevent Lena from dying of old age. How will the Valbaran flocks react to the knowledge that they can have hybrid children, and how will they approach the Jarilans. The UN ban on genetic engineering that technically only applies to humans will certainly start to chafe on people if they realize there's now safe options to pursue.

Not to mention that with such diverse tech trees the ways of thinking the technological hybridization possibilities between Humans, Jarilans, and Valbarans are almost dizzying. Jarilan biotech power armor to help make humans less squishy. New Valbaran laser point defense systems and powerful laser infantry weapons to defeat plasma shields as stealth weapons. Human, Valbaran, and Jarilan prefab FOB bases. So many possibilities there to explore.

I hope you continue writing and exploring this universe you've created, and thank you letting us see it.

Lovely story. I really enjoyed Liz and Jamie transtion to fatherhood. Congrats

@Snekguy, nonplussed actually means both surprised/confused and not surprised or confused, although the second is primarily U.S. usage. So you were correct every time you used it, although it does require context clues to figure out which definition you meant.

Going into this I didn't expect such a wholesome story. It's rather a love story then erotica. I mean who doesn't love cute kittens? Especially the upbringing of the kittens was so well written, you could really imagine them crawling around in their playpen. A sequel from the kittens point of view would be really interesting.

IM NOT CRYING, YOU’RE CRYINGG!!!!!

One thing I like is that you seem to leave yourself room to back out of any corner you might write yourself into. You appear to avoid limiting yourself from the kinds of characters and stories you can write. A bad author would just stick with whatever the first thing he thinks is cool exclusively, and ignore other options outright, but you not only left the option in this story for both parent specific and hybridized offspring, but also gave the specific couple in the story their own personal reasons for choosing the option they did. This lets him tell that story without limiting himself from others later down the line.

Like Becky from "Hostage" could want her own hybrid baby just for the attention after more people start discussing articles about Jamie and Liz, and I could easily see her choosing to go for the incubator option (so she could have a kid without ruining her figure) and not having many reservations about telling the doctors to make some more drastic changes.

It was SO LONG!! But it was so worth it. Very wholesome story. So many stories published to this site are short and very lacking in content. Others start out good, going on for a decent length and then come to an abrupt end leaving the reader waiting on another chapter that may or may not come. This is not the case here. It was a very enjoyable read. Great Job!

I thought it was wholesome. A welcome departure from the normal Lit fare. Your stories have not ever disappointed. Have you ever considered Bobcats? Smaller stature, no tail, twice the attitude. Swamp cats with the Borealan equivalent of a Cajun accent? Anyway, love your stuff. Thank you

Do you have a detailed timeline of events between these stories, or do you leave that more open and flexible? Worlds Apart was the first story in this series that left me wondering about this, because it didn't seem to quite match up to me at first.

Excellent, I look forward to the story continuing.

I think Jamie should become a writer, and write some books about their experiences off world and about the people that they met. Jamie could earn tens, if not hundreds, of millions for their family. And with five kids, they need more than a one bedroom apartment. Just think, with that kind of money, their family could buy their own faster and roomier ship from the insect, Jarion, to travel in.

Really? A weak ass grocery store bag boy that's with a body building xenolinguist who works at the embassy? Just how much more humiliating/degrading can you make the male protagonist in your story? Maybe at least give him a somewhat respectable job like some sort of tradesman or anything. Wait, didn't he go to college? How the fuck is he not even a manager at a grocery store? Talk about a pathetic lack of ambition.

I liked the story. It’s just Jamie response to adoption seems a bit messed up.

I'd love to see a part 3 with the family on Borealis.

I loved this story! Well written with such real emotion. I hope you will continue it.

This was great, I really enjoyed it. A Jarilan Genesmith Services lab on every planet in the coalition before the century is out. I was wondering if the Jarilans could have helped that fella from the assassination attempt, who had the radiation damage and needed all that medicine. Could only have helped PR.

This was an EXCELLENT series!

Great characters, believable (within the realm of Sci-Fi - that is) situations and outcomes, a smidge over descriptive at times (and sometimes repetitiously) plus ANY story with a nebulous reference to The HItchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy:

"I hope you guys find what you're looking for down there," she said, the pair turning to face her. "I think your chances are pretty good."

"Thank you," Jamie replied, extending his hand. "Without you and your crew, we would never have gotten this far."

She took it, giving it a vigorous shake.

"No problem," she replied with a grin. "Nothing wrong with picking up a couple of interstellar hitchhikers."

[Obvi NOT Vogons) Gets bonus love!

11/10 Wooden Spoon Handles!!!!!

Would have been better if the conception was more natural. Maybe give jamie genetic enhancements so they Wouldn't need machines. The offspring are basically just pure borelians with your method.

It would be nice to see another few chapters with the children growing up finding out how the human genes express in each of them

More chapters please.

when a human does not play the main character then the story can go jump in the lake.So far this is the worst episode but I will read more of this the episode'I love the series so please keep on with the story because I love it

Love it!!! Would love to see how the other species of the coalition have the same oppertunity and how they would react!!

Absolutely awesome. I am so into the story. I would love more chapters. Thank you for this Thank you very much.

[27.08.23]

Looooved this part:

"I would not describe you as a chick," he scoffed.

"I don't have to be a dainty little flower to like romance," she chided. "Now, cuddle with me, or I'll pull your arms out of their sockets."

"Yes, dear," he replied, Liz giving him a grin.

Still 11/10 Spoon Handles!!!!!

I've read this several times, and enjoyed it every time. If you decide to go for part 3, you might consider the embassy angel, first with the polar colony when the kittens are 13ish, and then finally a trip to the home world a few years later.