All Comments on 'Dena and the Tornado Pt. 01'

She is the baby/house sitter. Where are the kids?

Hope you add to this and it gets hotter. Maybe she moves in with him.

He said the kids were with the grandparents.... he referred to it at least twice..... read all of the words and you would know this.

Good story, great lead in with the open door for more.

Yes, very nice story -- hot / arousing and has so much potential !! Yeah, Dena was in the right place at the right time. She obviously wanted to try his cock and he wanted to check out her big boobs and body. Now that she gave him a BJ and he's felt her up; he needs to eat her out well and then screw her hard. I think they might become a couple at some point ?? Cannot wait for another chapter or two. Thanks !

A well crafted plot and just the right amount of description. Excellently written. I can see a lot of potential plot lines here. I wait eagerly for the second chapter. 5*

enjoyable. minimal mistakes. very nice.

the line that stick out for me..."...like she was more interested in how my penis felt in her hand than how her hand felt on my penis." I liked that.

Not your typical "Slept with my wife's sister" story :)

I liked the change of pace of it;

I was a bit thrown off by the body positioning, but I freely admit I'm exhausted and should be asleep already so perhaps I'm just not envisioning the proportions right.

Otherwise, please keep writing

Thanks for a great story. How about another chapter or two. Thanks

There aren't enough stories on this site with women built like Dena. I want to read about the main character getting up in that big booty.

Good start...expect more...want more...write more...Thank you

You are a great writter, your discription if whats going on , and the way you discribe the scenery is so vivid as if the reader is transformed to that place ,felt as if I was in that shelter watching them.

Please continue. Can’t wait for the next chapter.

Bad weather and unplanned good sex. Making of a good read, Thanks for sharing.

I've seen you use the word "contracted" incorrectly here and most recently in a story that you submitted to literotica in late October 2022.

The definition for contracted as it applies to the way you used it is "decrease in size, number, or range. for example, "glass contracts as it cools""

I'm quite certain that you intended for it to indicate that your character's cock twitched in response to some form of stimulus.

I also have to take exception to you placing this in the INCEST/TABOO category, there's absolutely nothing TABOO in this story. I might be wrong, but most people that I have met would find nothing wrong with a widower falling in love with his deceased wife's sister. He isn't cheating and by your story she's not dating anyone else. Most parents who have lost their daughter would support their other daughter if she developed feelings for the former brother-in-law under these circumstances. Which brings up the following quotation from the story:

> If Dena got upset, I'd be totally fucked. She'd think I was betraying her dead sister. She'd never sit for

> me again. She might tell her parents, and they would be furious. They might let the grandkids over, but

> they'd never speak to me again. It could be seen as a betrayal of the entire family. Hell, they might even

> tell my own family.<

Yeah, what a load of horse crap! The ONLY way everyone is going to get pissed off is if you take advantage of her or force her against her will. Such a shame that this was written that way. It has great potential to be a good love story. 2/5

Since you turned off the comments section for PART TWO of this story, I returned here in order to have my say.

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Quoting:

"I put her on all fours and told her to wait. I went over to the table box and rifled through it. I pulled out a small tube. It was Neosporin."

Seriously? Dude!!! Have you ever actually tried that for real? 😳

Neosporin might look like Vaseline, but it has a totally different viscosity to it. It's thicker and stiffer than Vaseline and certainly doesn't compare with other lubricants specifically designed for sexual intercourse. You're better off using saliva for goodness sake! I've had enough. I'm glad that you set this story aside and walked away from it. 1/5

Very realistic and nicely written.

Bill S.

good stuff, if a bit short by not having Dena orgasm. the intensity of the sudden forced closeness came through on the page. forced closeness is probably my favorite sub-genre, and it can be easy to screw up because authors forget about the reason they are in the situation to begin with.

the description could have been expanded and used some attention to detail. i had a hard time following what their positioning was, and had to reread the last 5-10 sentences many times. however, it appears that your writing improved over time, so forget i said anything.

@ScottishTexan - if Dena did get upset at his *advances* then yes, everything he thought would be a real possibility. use your brain.