All Comments on 'Tricked by Boss Pt. 01'

Amateurs need encouragement and direction. I can tell English isn't your first language and this story was difficult for you to express. I get the feeling ~ if this were "fiction" ~ adding the burden of "creative thought" would eliminate your ability to write at all. This must be a true story.

Therefore, I say Continue On. There must be some very interesting twists here.

Keeping working on the writing - it does appear English isn't your first language, so I might suggest either a Literotica editor or just a friend who knows English well to read what you write and offer suggestions. That said, the premise is great, and I think this could be beginning of a great story. Keep up the work!

I must have missed the mind control. needed something to happen but it never did

I never vote down a story. I either give 5 or don't vote. I could certainly elicit what you were trying to say and I like the genre. I think it would be nice to get a sympathetic editor that can help you say what what you want without having to cut it short. Keep writing and try and hone the story before giving it to an editor. Effort always wins through.

Pay a little more attention to spelling and missing words. Proof reading will help with that. All in all, keep writing. I'm enjoying the story.

I don't know why everyone is pussy footing around the author. I got balls so I will tell him it sucks. It's has numerous errors, makes no sense and is rushed. Either author is an idiot or jotted this down after his wet dream. As for encouragement, I say stop writing. That's right. I encourage you to stop writing and get back to your high school and learn.

Need to write more.