All Comments on 'Amethyst Purple Pt. 04'

Great story with so many well-portrayed emotions.

I just have one observation. At the end when Dad is talking to his kids he gets the second part of the time line wrong. In the story she does not get pregnet with the twins until she is in Savana GA., but in Dad's time line she got pregnet several months earlier when she was snowed in

Thitabe, Thanks for the catch! You're right, I missed that. I'll have to make a correction.

But did Riley marry a man or a woman, the story never makes reference to a husband or name? So many details and so many misses. Just like the DNA was not to verify parentage it was to tell the kids if they have his CF gene...

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Often too long and boring due to the minutia of detail that slowed down the story - I skipped or fast read paragraphs to keep it moving. True, it ended nicely for all and the CHEAT got hers but if not that marriage was doomed to fail soon as well as her job.

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She was a shit mother to the family. She arrogantly self privileging herself in cheats until the F5 got her. I'm truly surprised she did not bring home/share an STD with Ted - that would have blown the lid off their marriage.

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I'll give the series 4* but all the parts only 3*. Hooyah

You Bastard!!! Almost four chapters and about 17 long pages in you first build them up to the perfect...THEN... just when I think your going to put them back together for a happy ending you kill Marti!! I truly hope you allow someone to re=write your ending because yours sucks... When he found out about the kids not being his he could have forgiven her because without the infidelity then no kids. There are so many other endings you could have used. After all of those pages if anyone likes her being killed off they need counselling...

IndyOn

Be my guest, re-write the ending to suit your vision of reality if you'd like. But you must consider one thing: life, unlike pretty much every submission on this site, is no fantasy. Sometimes bad shit happens to good (and not so good) people. While I don't subscribe to the BTB mentality so well-rooted in this genre of stories I disagree even more with the RAAC crowd. Everyone makes choices and choices come with rewards as well as consequences. Often those consequences can be pretty dire, life isn't "fair", get used to it and deal with it.

So if you don't like my tale as I've written it, grow a set and write your own instead of hiding behind your keyboard and bitching about how "unfair" it is. Of course, looking at your profile I can see you aren't very prolific as an author. Being a narrow-minded, short-sighted self-appointed critic is much easier a task for those who lack the mentality and vision to create a unique story of thier own.

But you do you, brother, do what you know and carry on

I really enjoyed this series. But, ooohhh... I have never hated a person so much as Marti. She pissed me off so much with her actions. My best guess is the guilt of her wandering ways; just screwed her up so bad that she just wasn’t a functioning human being in the end. At least... Ted got 3 great kids. Thank-you for your writing.

This is one of the shittiest long winding not reaching anywhere piece of shit story series i have read,! the authour seems mentally challenged... most likly by seeing his writing io can say he was born to a mom who fucked around so he never knew his father.. constant exposure to his whore moms lovers has screwed his sense of right and wrong ..hence his characters seem to consider sexual flings as just normal... i do hope this author gets some mental help with his issues..and ghe bio says its a couple....so what have we here..instaed of one fucked up mental morally delinquint person...we have two... hope u dont have kids? it would be a real pity for a morraly compromised couple to parent kids.. theyll end up as pimps or whores or worse still druggies or killers! please have the female part of your couple remove her child making bits and save the world a little!

God awful. A story about nothing. SnatchKisser told Indyon in the comments to feel free to write his own ending. Problem with that is Indyon would have to rewrite the entire story as well.

Killing off Marti before the realization he was without biological children was just a poor decision by the author. All impact the story might have had was thrown away, no catharsis was available, the resolution was a side track devoid of interest.

bobareeno, you seem to be operating under the flawed assumption that my stories exist in some idealistic fantasy world. In real life, 'closure' and the catharsis you were hoping to find in Amethyst (or most likely most anything I write) is rarely realized so that is reflected in my stories. Only in fantasies do the players ever have their questions of 'why did she (or he) betray me?', et al answered. Only in fantasies are the 'betrayers' punished to the extent the victims feel is justified. However, everyone of us, regardless of what has happened in our lives have our own opportunities for our own 'happily ever after', even if it isn't what we wished for in our youth. Ted loved his kids and never failed them, even after discovering that they weren't sired by him. I want to think that even after he discovered the truth, ted was grateful for the kids since he was destined to be incapable of having his own. Maybe he forgave Marti in the end, even if only to save his own sanity; no one who holds a grudge against someone else for any extended period of time can do so without suffering some level of damage to their psyche. So, if you want guaranteed 'catharsis' there are thousands of other options more suitable for your tastes to be found here on Lit but don't be arrogant enough to condemn my story as being unrealistic when it is closer to real life than 99% of the submissions on Lit today. At least not until you have some submissions of your own to justify your qualifications as a critic.

Very well written story which I thoroughly enjoyed reading. Solid 5 stars, thanks for posting.

As a general self-imposed rule I don't respond to 'Anonymous' critics but you guys make it so easy! I know that the average 'Anonymous' poster is a Troll and I usually agree with the philosophy of "don't feed the troll' but I'm going to make a brief exception. This comment will be brief, if you can believe that anything I write can be described as 'brief'.

One anonymous poster responded to my invitation to a somewhat passionate critic to pen his/her own ending to my submission so that it fit more closely to his/her own idea of perfection by asserting that in order for someone to do so they would be forced to re-write the entire story. Again, be my guest. If you need to rewrite my tale, get a wiggle on. I'll make absolutely sure to read your version and provide you with the most appropriate critique. The difference though, is that what response I give will not be stained by an arrogant flaming on my part. Unless such a response is required.

Another 'Anonymous' critic suggests that I'm "mentally challenged". I have an I.Q. of 147, a college education, and am mentally stable enough to have earned a 'Secret' clearance, even though that has no relevance in civilian life. He/she surmises that my mental deficiencies are a result of "most likly by seeing his writing io can say he was born to a mom who fucked around so he never knew his father..". Yes, this grammar is penned by someone who is challenging my mental acuity. Both of my parents are still married to each other and have been for nearly sixty years. I've never known either my mother or my father to ever have taken a lover. I believe I have a very healthy sense of right and wrong, and I have done all in my power to ensure that my children were taught how to discern right from wrong and make to most appropriate life decisions. They graduated with honors and have both gone on to secondary educations, one in Nuclear Physics and they both, at the ages of 21 and 23 are already established in jobs where they both earn salaries well over $50k a year. My oldest is doing so working full time while he also drives more than an hour away, every day to college where he is also a full-time student. Remember my earlier reference to 'Nuclear Physics'? So maybe, just maybe, they'll dodge that 'druggies', 'pimps', 'whores' and 'killers' bullet and end up decent members of society. Go figure.

I'd love to sit down and edit what you wrote but upon closer inspection, I realized that were I to do so, the copy I'd return to you would be predominately covered by red ink exposing your needed corrections.

So, how about finding and correcting your own mistakes instead of attempting to create complaints about mine.

Oh, and 'KRD19254, in answer to your question, in the opening statements during the wedding, the Minister mentions Riley getting married to a man.

3 stars - no comment I could make would add anything to the comments already mentioned.

Unsatisfyiing but it fit.

While I sincerely appreciate the hard work that it takes to put together a work like this, in my opinion, it went on much too long in accomplishing very little. I really hate to say that, but, when writing what amounts to a novella, the reader better be paid off in the end, and that didn't happen here. Sorry, but only 3 stars for me. (I'd like to have given 3.5, but...)

I did not like it BUT it rates a solid five. From beginning to end I was hoping she was not going to cheat, alas, c'est la vie. The addition of the authors review of the snide comments added immensely to the story. One might well ask of any "Anonymous" poster how your writings may be evaluated?

And finally, are we to ever receive a followup, a continuation, to "Cobalt Blue?" Please do not leave the story unfinished.

A very well written storey, which I enjoyed, however my criticism is; this site is called “LITEROTICA” there was no erotica at all in this storey, just a little documentary on the sex. In spite of this I still give this ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️.