All Comments on 'Dying Heartache'

Revenge is needed in this case!

5

It's a real shame that your story is served by such caricatured characters.

The stupid wife

The bitchy mother

The boastful lover

The stupid boss

Need to see the guilty parties punished to get a 5

It was, at best, at 3. Especially leaving people hanging with just a "Plan B". That sounds more like a writers cop out. No, now that I think more about it, make it a 2 star for copping out.

Sorry, no vote. I expected better from you.

That is an intensely sad story, but I can understand that man and his friends very well. At least in the end he had friends to support him. Good job!

The whole story was telegraphed in the first two sentences and just got more glum from there on out. Depressing and nothing to redeem it. I really am tired of all these “situation devices” where hubby comes home to find wife getting dressed up to go out with the boss or some asshat and expect him to just suck it up. Like this story, they are devoid of any serious attempt at plot development or reason. Cheap tricks don’t make for readable stories. This was a grimy and pathetic excuse, not even truly sad because there was no one to identify with.

I don’t agree with some of the others on here as I survived a cheating wife and a hospitals death sentence. I could put myself in the husband’s place except I survived. Cancer that came back three times, open heart surgery, and a stroke. All that and the lying, cheating, whore of a wife hurt the most. Maybe you have to be there to see this story for how well written it was. 5 stars.

REVAGE

This was good, i would definitely like to read a part 2 with Plan B ;)

I can't help thinking there is more to this story. please continue

needs further revenge , good move leaving his share of the house to nephews but he could have stopped paying mortgage insurance and she would have not been payed out

Looking forward to part two!

Not bad. Would have liked to have read more of the aftermath.

Not very good. Not very believable. Terminal being put in an unwilling cuckold position, this really only has 1 possible outcome and I don't have to articulate it.

Epilogue should have only been a string of conversations among the local district attorneys about whether it was worthwhile pursuing prosecution of 3 homicides against a walking dead man.

Final paragraph of the epilogue should have been the last paragraph of the main body.

Nice work, thanks. 5 BIG ASS FUCKING HUGE FLAMING NOVA STARS!

Plan B?

Oh, no. No. No! You can not stop there...........

This is a great story. I can't wait for the next chapter.

Yes, plan B please

Good story, I hope there's a part 2, the Bentley's get what coming.

Author copped out.

Read a story pretty Similar, but that story he had a young daughter. That the dying husband never got to say good bye to. As the cheating wife had taken the daughter with her lover to an Island vacation, while he died..

A sad story, but very good. This author is improving his writing. But I don't think there will be a part 2.

***Thanks for the read. What a downer!!!!

I'd actually LIKE the plan B, to see the twists and turns of the surreptitious revenge. Please write it. Won't be erotic, but would make a fine coda to this story.

I hope we get to read Plan B.

When's Plan B coming?

Plan B please!

1 star so far. I'll change it to higher if you bother posting part 2 where everyone - especially the whore - get really really harsh punishment, instead of a gift of paid off mortgage. Where's the "revenge" your tags lied about???

This could have been an amazing BTB but you thoroughly destroyed it into whore-wins.

What the fuck is this? An incomplete story that never went far enough and we are left saying WTF? Felt like a first draft of chapter 1. So much missing.

Thin, weak, cliched, incomplete.

You couldn’t even be bothered to properly finish your story.

Pathetic!

1/5

I gave you 3 stars because I like the story, but you did not finishing it... NOT GOOD AT ALL!

If you make Ch.02 with Hell fire and scorched earth, then it will be +5.

PS: In real life lot of scumbags escape the punishment, why would I want more of it in a fiction?

As of the date of this comment this story is a little over a month old. If it gets another part then it gets a rating. I don't rate unfinished stories

1*,,, NOW finish the damn story!!! You left a good story and ended up with a 1*!

Two for two stories you didn't bother to finish. Two for two 1* on top of the lack of closure, you write nothing of joy or happiness, only horrible people and good people betrayed.