All Comments on 'Corruption of a Geek Goddess Pt. 04'

As usual, incredible work. I can't wait to see the kinky shits you will write. I'm not very eager for her to hook up with Cody but that could be hot if it's only sex and Dylan agrees. I really hope the story ends with Chelsea trying to get back with Mark, leaving a brokenhearted Dylan behind, her being incredibly disappointed in the marital raw sex and running straight to Dylan and admitting she loves her daddy more than her husband.

Really it started out like an original cuck story but turns out to be same old story. Cuck too dumb to realize what’s going on. Slut realizing she will do anything to get off and a bull doing what bulls do. Just because you ask interesting questions at the end make doesn’t make it original.

I'm going to be unreasonably sad and disappointed if this series ends with Mark broken hearted.

ziman99: "I really hope the story ends with Chelsea trying to get back with Mark, leaving a brokenhearted Dylan behind, her being incredibly disappointed in the marital raw sex and running straight to Dylan and admitting she loves her daddy more than her husband."

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Ouch, poor Mark! But also: damn, very hot!

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I have a plan for the ending, but it could easily change as I'm writing it.

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I put up a poll on Discord (link in bio, just scroll up until you find it) regarding what kind of ending people are rooting for. I'm going to try to go my own way regardless of the outcome, but I'm certainly interested in hearing about what people want to see. Just, make sure you don't get too invested in your choice...

Forget that hater- your story has so much more depth, emotion, and humanity that can't be reduced to "the same old story." Looking forward to the next part. Can't believe you'll be able to conclude everything in one last chapter (which is a good/impressive thing, as it shows how much detail your story has). Still, I know you have varied interests, thank you for sharing your stories and please continue to publish whatever interests you, first and foremost

its a great story but it appears its going to end the way these stories always do, with the girl dumping the loving boyfriend for the jerk. I hope thats not the case here, it would be nice if the loving couple wins for a change

Great story; good dialog, great character development and well written sex scenes. Ideally, we would see some personal growth in both Mark and Chelsea. We would also see a strengthening of their relationship. Mark needs to understand that it’s OK to assert himself to protect Chelsea and their relationship. Chelsea should recognize that not all relationships are healthy and S&M relationships by their nature require increasingly extreme behaviors to maintain the psychological effect. Guardrails are put in place to protect protect people and relationships in situations such as these. It is obvious that Mark is much more selfless than Dylan it would be realistic for Chelsea to realize Dylan’s selfishness. Ideally Mark and Chelsea end up together and will have found ways to balance their kinks while still protecting and prioritizing their relationship. Thank you for taking the time to write and share your stories with us.

I love this story!!!! It’s so hot! Hopefully Chelsea keeps her promise to Dylan and doesn’t let Mark fuck her pussy. She should tell Mark that he has to wait until their wedding night for him to fuck her pussy again, or should I say Dylan’s pussy? Hopefully Chelsea walks down the aisle carrying Dylan’s child. Dylan should always be in their lives. I can’t wait to read more about this.

Uuufff... See, Mark's alarm bells should have gobe off as soon as Chelsea asked if they should stop. His kettle is probably going overdrive on the background. I hope they manage to save it but he is just a bit too clueless imho. And Chelsea is cheating on him and still facing no repercussions which is starting to become annoying. Mark is a tad too pliable to be believable imho. We don't get too much insight into his brain. You gave us a little bit early on but then the whole story happened and we don't see Mark's deeper thoughts besides "this is hot" his worry and angst is a bit too glossed over imho. I hope you find a way to "save" these characters.

Wonderful story, have been waiting on this chapter with anticipation! Absolutely cannot (but will!) wait for part 5. (And I'm just gonna say it, I hope she is so fucking pregnant lmao)

Small typo on page 6: "For those four weeks, I'm the only one allowed in my pussy". Pretty sure that should be "in your".

New reader to the series and I really enjoy it so far!

I think if she was more transparent Mark would have way more trepidation about continuing the fantasy and if Chelsea seemed over enthused to push it, maybe even more so would stop it.

I think it's realistic that they can go back to monogamy afterwards because Chelsea in the coming 4 weeks might realize sex is just sex and can't replace everything Mark does for her. Maybe it would be something they do on special occasions once a year in the future.

I sincerely hope it does not end with Mark being heartbroken because he decided to take the leap with Chelsea, too often in these stories are the cucks on the losing end.

(P.S discord link not working for me)

Please be good to Mark in the ending.

Mark is losing her. She's finally starting to question why he sits back as Dylan fucks and defiles his fiancée. She knows that it's not a game anymore. It's a competition for her body and mind. Dylan is pressing his advantage like any alpha male would and is doing the right thing by forbiding Mark from penetrating Chelsea going forward. Mark doesn't deserve her. Dylan is the fitter, stronger male who has conquered Chelsea with his big cock. He owns her pussy now and it's only a matter of time before he impregnates her. Let Mark raise another man's child.

hi vzb.

can't join the discord server it tell me the link has expired.

good story so far!.

nvm got it to work. got the link to the discord on antartica77 literotica page.

Am an avid follower of this series. The details in the storytelling is just amazing. Props to the author. Just an idea to what I think might be a happy ending for all.

Chelsea confesses her struggles and attraction with Dylan to Mark. After doing some soul searching, Mark and Chelsea stayed strong and decided to stick to the agreement. Chelsea love and respects Mark enough to end things with Dylan permanently. However, as both now realizing their new found kink and dynamic, especially after a very lousy first night maritial sex, Chelsea and Mark agreed for a 1 way open relationship on Chelsea's part (never again with Dylan in consideration to Mark) with clearer rules to not let anything jeapordize thier love for each other.

Nice chapter overall! The inevitable exhibitionism on their socials was done solidly, maybe a bit heavy, but not too intense that it leaves things irrecoverable. The drug use and implied sharing were meh, I hope we don't continue down either of those paths. The climax was really great, with a great focus on denying Mark. I loved the Chelsea angst and giving Mark an off ramp. I hope we get some more Mark angst. I look forward to exploring Mark being manipulated by Chelsea more in the future. However, the subtle denial by Chelsea at the end was even better and leaves open a scene for Mark to accept it later. Even though Dylan and Chelsea seem ready for the wedding night, I hope a lot of the remaining story focusses on them getting Mark to accept the inevitable as well. Great part 4!

To those fretting over the direction of the story and the seemingly inevitable (or clichéd) "ruined wimp boyfriend" ending: don't jump to any conclusions, ok? As I've said, nothing is written in stone yet and I can't promise an ending that's to your liking, but so far Chelsea hasn't really allowed to herself to grapple with the choice she'll have to make, or even to acknowledge that a choice will have to be made. For that matter, neither has Mark. Once they both wake up to the fact that there's a battle being waged, events might start unfolding in a different way.

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So far reader feedback suggests a surprisingly even split between people hoping for an ascendant Dylan, a rejuvenated Mark/Chelsea relationship, and a continued-but-healthier cuck relationship. Interesting!

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There are a lot of balls in the air, a lot of loose threads and possibilities. Fair warning: not every single one of these is likely to be picked up. (For instance, will Chelsea wind up fucking Cody/Nora? Will she be outed in some way on the internet by being on Dylan's channel?) Some of the worrying possibilities are more red herring than foreshadowing.

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Oh, and a note on the timeline: with the different POVs, sometimes the narrative can double back or get ahead of itself. For instance, that conversation b/w Mark & Chelsea about whether to stop early: we see it 2/3 of the way through in the last Mark section (which is all about trust and his motivation to keep going), but then it comes back at the end, and (hopefully) it strikes the reader as much more ominous by then. If you're wondering about Dylan's wedding invite, because I know that's not super-clear: Mark is writing that a couple days after the very last scene, with Chelsea snuggling him in bed. So their conversation about that will happen (possibly off-camera) the day after the last scene in this chapter. I know, it's a little confusing. I appreciate your indulgence.

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Thanks to everyone who's chimed in so far - keep it up!

Absolutely stunning chapter as usual! Personally I’m hoping Chelsea stays with Mark but they continue the cuckolding after their marriage. While the ‘bad ending’ of her leaving Mark to be with Dylan is hot, I can’t help but find that to be a much sadder ending to a great story. Thanks for the chapter, I’m eagerly awaiting your next work.

Great chapter. Though the timeline shifts are rather confusing and the work could have been proofread better.

It's good to see Dylan corrupting the Geek Goddess (though sexually and psychologically, rather than with drugs). I hope we see more of that. We're missing out on Chelsea corrupting/pushing Mark, right now he seems like he's just kind of absent and fumbling the ball. It would be nice seeing him face more conflict. Even though Chelsea and Dylan won't need his permission to knock her up, it would be great to push him into consenting to that and everything in between.

Discord link on my profile should be fixed now -- thanks for the heads-up.

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Anon: "Mark is a tad too pliable to be believable imho. We don't get too much insight into his brain. You gave us a little bit early on but then the whole story happened and we don't see Mark's deeper thoughts besides "this is hot" his worry and angst is a bit too glossed over imho. I hope you find a way to "save" these characters."

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You're not entirely wrong here -- this chapter was very much focused on Dylan/Chelsea. There just wasn't a lot for Mark to do except try to talk himself into everything still being ok, because he doesn't want to think about the possibility that isn't, and because he's still thinking with his dick. He does this very much to his detriment: it's tragic, and you're supposed feel bad about his foolishness and what he's allowing to be done to him. Going forward, things will be a bit different. He can't delude himself forever, and he'll (at least) try to get things under control. He'll matter more to the story.

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mongoliajoe: "It is obvious that Mark is much more selfless than Dylan it would be realistic for Chelsea to realize Dylan’s selfishness."

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Chelsea is a bit cock-addled right now -- disoriented by the needs of her body and the strong emotions being stirred up by this new situation and new kind of lover. But she's not stupid: at a certain point (e.g., when she sees what this all might be doing to Mark, or if Dylan oversteps) she'll see another side to things ... but, by that point, will she have the will to change direction?

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tunii: "Small typo on page 6: "For those four weeks, I'm the only one allowed in my pussy". Pretty sure that should be 'in your'."

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That's no typo - he's just reminding Chelsea that it belongs to him. If it's not entirely clear when you're reading, that's my fault.

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As anyone can see from the comments so far, different readers want very different things. I've gotten very thoughtful feedback from all sides, those hoping for a good end for Mark & Chelsea as a couple, others for Dylan's total dominance & Chelsea's total corruption (and Mark will just have to deal with it).

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And I feel both impulses! So, while I doubt we'll have a pure Happily Ever After, I'm not eager to destroy Mark and turn Chelsea into nothing but helpless knocked-up slut. Precisely where things fall in the end will depend on how things shake out in the writing (characters sometimes refuse to do what you intended; the plan you had can turn out to feel phony when you get there and you have to pivot). Hopefully, no one feels too betrayed by what I come up with.

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Thanks so much to everyone for sharing their thoughts! It helps a lot with seeing the story more clearly, and it really motivates me to get back to work.

Great story! Can’t wait to read more, love the specific type of dynamic you’ve created here. I have lots of wedding or honeymoon cuckold fantasies that this is rekindling. Can’t wait to see how Mark reacts to being denied and being forced to go pussy free until the wedding. The entire condominium rule was super exciting too! Thanks again!

You talk about the characters being more clear headed instead of sex addled. This story is on Literotica. I hope they keep using their sex organs to do their thinking for them.

Is there an option for team Dylan, but the marriage with Mark stays? That's what I'd vote for. Mark has to accept Chelsea's need for Dylan permanently, even though it's not what he wants. I hope the humiliation in the bedroom stays as Chelsea and Dylan break down his boundaries one by one.

I hope Mark is present for more of the sex scenes in the next part. He was too absent in this part. It felt like his character wasn't progressing on his path towards submission.

Wow great read! I love dynamic as well. While I know everyone has their take on the characters, and a lot of discussion of them being too blind or unrealistic, I see it as thinking with their gentials or pure unbridled lust that drives them. Do these decisions make sense all the time? No. Are their actions reasonable? absolutely not. But it seems to be that the emphasis has been on both Mark and Chelsea willingly in denial because, well, because they're too horny. I personally love the cuckold style of dynamic where the hotwife is unable to resist / completely in lust with the bull and this plays right into it. This is well above the average erotica IMO. Thanks for the great contribution and can't wait for more. I feel spoiled and sad since I discovered the first story just this week and can't wait for the next one already. Also, don't be afraid to follow your gut and do what you want as an author, since so far you've been able to craft a great story. Love the breeding fetish, the condom rule for the cuck, the rules set by the bull, and the slow dominance over the cuck. Can't wait for more!

Easy Five Stars. I think of the natural progression of this story is for this to become a full time cuckold arrangement. With Dylan as the bull. A dedicated throuple. Then happily ever after. That's the end. Them means is up to you. Best of luck with this last chapter. And write on.

I think the issue i have with Mark and Chelsea is that Mark doesn't know their relationship is at risk, because Chelsea isn't being honest with him. He's five moves behind in a game that he doesn't even know he's playing. He's going to have to make up a lot of ground when he gets in the game - will he have enough time? Unclear.

Amazing! Love it, hope there's more

Fantastic story! let Dylan spit in her mouth while she has an orgasm and some friend of dylan finger her in the party! kudos keei it going

I don't know if this can be finished in a single chapter. Mark still needs to watch Dylan pretend to breed Chelsea, so they can train him to accept it and maybe even ask for it when they're ready to do it for real. Mark still has a lot of training ahead of him.

Wow! Amazing! Thanks for posting!

First time commenter on your stories, VZB. I love the angst of this story, but being a traditional guy, I'm very disturbed about Chelsea lying to Mark, and not telling him everything that's going on with Dylan. Mark is clueless to the REAL important stuff, not a wimp, but being treated unfairly. I realize there's many ways you could take this, but hopefully Mark and Chelsea end up together in the end, and maybe Dylan disappears. I kinda liked how Antarctica killed off the bull in his Cassandra series...finality. But whatever you do is fine, cos it's your story. The sex is HOTTT!!

tooby: I have no plans to kill off Dylan, ha ... but as time goes by he does seem to come closer to deserving it. He just seems to get meaner & meaner as I'm writing, even when that's not what I had in mind.

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Anon: "You talk about the characters being more clear headed instead of sex addled. This story is on Literotica. I hope they keep using their sex organs to do their thinking for them."

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I know hear you, and it's a good point. I promise I'm not shooting for 100% logic and sanity; more like the characters finally starting to understand the danger they're in, and struggling not to surrender to lust anyway.

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Voyeur_Element: "Are their actions reasonable? absolutely not. But it seems to be that the emphasis has been on both Mark and Chelsea willingly in denial because, well, because they're too horny. I personally love the cuckold style of dynamic where the hotwife is unable to resist / completely in lust with the bull and this plays right into it."

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Yep! That's the part of this fantasy I'm most drawn to: the characters know there's a danger of blowing up their whole lives (or maybe can't even bear to look at the danger), but they're animal urges take over and compel them to go forward anyway. Biology trumps logic.

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Anon: "I don't know if this can be finished in a single chapter. Mark still needs to watch Dylan pretend to breed Chelsea, so they can train him to accept it and maybe even ask for it when they're ready to do it for real. Mark still has a lot of training ahead of him."

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So, the more chapters there are before the wedding, the more extreme (and cruel) the relationship will become. I kinda see my job as getting the characters as far down into a deep, depraved hole as possible WITHOUT making it totally implausible that they might be able to pull up after the wedding and salvage a non-disastrous ending for Chelsea and (especially) Mark. There has to at least be some uncertainty there. It's a balancing act, and I'm still weighing whether I can do this sex scene or that without the whole thing tipping over into erotic catastrophe.

As much as I love this story and your writing, I love a happy ending and really want a happily ever after for Mark and Chelsea, with Dylan out of the picture. I'd love to see Chelsea eventually turn against Dylan and see Mark's worth.

cody and norah were delicious as always. i hope if chelsea wont join them she will at least get to watch them, through a window or a crack in the door. i hope cody knocks norah up top, maybe how real it becomes to people so close to chelsea is what scares her off from dylan. i think mark can show emotional intelligence towards chelsea that dylan cant, maybe that can help equalize the playing field a bit. or maybe dylan and cody just win, destroy chelsea and norah's marriages and have them, i am fine with the possibilities

Vzb, great responses on all the most recent comments, especially that last one. I think it's all about balancing the plausibility of an eventual redemption with the plausibility of the characters making whatever final decisions they need to make. Things that move them down that path hurt the chance of redemption but make the ending more believable, everything else hurts thr chance of redemption without helping the ending (though could add in other ways).

No matter what you do I'm sure this will have a great ending and go out with a bang!

I want to see some humiliation for Mark at the Wedding with Dylan getting first dips on consummating the marriage. Pregnancy can come later.

I love the updates on Nora personally.

Keeping her cheating is very hot imo.

The tiny excerts about her are hot, I was just hoping to see mkre than 1 in each chapter. There was only 1 in the beginning and I wqs desperately hoping to see at least 1 more later in the chapter.

Love the story.

If you're leaning towards pregnancy, I'm looking forward to them easing into, perhaps with Mark starting to be present and listening to them dirty talk about being intentionally careless. It would be extra hot if Chelsea jokes about imagining what their future babies would look like and admiring Dylan's eyes or something.

Great read!

As so often with cuckolding stories, it's hard for writers to stay away from the rabbit hole. More extreme, more denial, more humiliation, cages, multiple men, pregnancy fantasies, abandonment, etc. I lose interest when the realism fades. This couple decided to get married, it should be the most romantic period in their lives. Spicing things up is very cool and could happen, but ruining it all to this level is just - well - bogus. Their relationship will never be the same, to the point where they should honestly ask themselves if they really should get married.

You sir, are a great writer. I love the build-up, the dialogue, the sex scenes. But the plot is just a turn off (for me). But I'm very much looking forward to other stories from you, with a different theme and tone.

"Yeah, she's finally in her element. Right where she belongs." Soooo fucking hot.

Also, "Giving herself to this man — to the right man — was like shooting pure uncut bliss into her veins" is so well written. Also, the description of the sounds and smells of Chelsea's arousal really add. So well done!

Omg, you have to keep going! Please keep going!!

For the love of god, publish this in a book series and get paid for it- but please keep going!

Good stuff! I hope Mark is there for some of the sex next time, he was missing out!

IMO for a *status quo ante* ending to be both plausible and satisfying there has to be more of a positive arc or some sort of actualization for Mark. Some greater depth to his internal struggle, unless the intended destination is going to be purely tragic. But then again I'm probably not in the target audience for this genre of story.

What a great story. Chelsea is such a delightful character. I love those tender moments when she's less horny and she's kind to Mark, even if those moments and acts of kindness need to become increasingly platonic and in practice just serve to get him calm and comfortable for what's to come. I love how she pushes and humiliates him when she's more sexual. I absolutely love the dynamic where she gently but firmly enforces Dylan's rules on Mark. She really makes this story what it is and her slow but steady manipulation of Mark is even hotter than her scenes with Dylan. I'm looking forward to reading about her getting everything she wants.

Oh, also that other comment about her imagining and describing what her babies with Dylan would like is so hot. I can imagine her doing it dreamily lying in bed with him with her hand on his chest and a big smile on her face. I don't know if we'll get anything like that, but I know that whatever you do write is going to be epic.

Nice chapter! Though I don't know if it's just me, but Chelsea and Nora doing coke and acting like complete sluts pulls me out of the story. It just feels like too much out of nowhere. Maybe the Nora plotline could spin off from the series, a place to explore complete depravity without ruining Chelsea's nice aura of innocence?

Thanks to the readers who've chimed in so far with some favorite lines. I throw a lot of dirty talk and smutty descriptions at the wall, and I really never know which ideas stick the best. Always appreciated.

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Re: Cody/Nora: We're not done with those two, I can say that much. They definitely have a role to play in the plot, and an actual sex scene involving them has been on my 'possibilities' list for a while. Also, I'll tell you a secret: Nora's real-life namesake would like to see it, so, I don't know ... it might need to happen. In some way.

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Anon: "It would be extra hot if Chelsea jokes about imagining what their future babies would look like and admiring Dylan's eyes or something."

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Yes ... yes, that would be hot. A big reason Chelsea has a breeding kink is that I have a breeding kink, so all that stuff tends to sound good to me.

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Anon: "IMO for a *status quo ante* ending to be both plausible and satisfying there has to be more of a positive arc or some sort of actualization for Mark. Some greater depth to his internal struggle, unless the intended destination is going to be purely tragic."

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I don't WANT a purely tragic ending for Mark. Whether that means a status quo ante (with ominous undertones) or a healthier compromise going forward or something else entirely, we'll see. But you're not wrong that Mark could do with some more pro-active behavior or characterization.

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I have ideas on that front, but honestly I'm still in the market new ones. So if a reader out there has a neat idea for something Mark can actually *DO* to try and change his situation, please drop me a line. Maybe I use the idea and you get a shout-out, maybe it helps spark some new thoughts of my own, whatever. It's the kind of thing that's very useful to me.

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Anon: "As so often with cuckolding stories, it's hard for writers to stay away from the rabbit hole. More extreme, more denial, more humiliation, cages, multiple men, pregnancy fantasies, abandonment, etc. I lose interest when the realism fades. This couple decided to get married, it should be the most romantic period in their lives. Spicing things up is very cool and could happen, but ruining it all to this level is just - well - bogus. Their relationship will never be the same, to the point where they should honestly ask themselves if they really should get married.

You sir, are a great writer. I love the build-up, the dialogue, the sex scenes. But the plot is just a turn off (for me). But I'm very much looking forward to other stories from you, with a different theme and tone."

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Hey, that's fair. It's largely a matter of different people being after different things: I could write this story about characters who do a better job communicating and keeping things under control, but in a smutty sex-fantasy story, I generally prefer to tell the stories that go further and feel more dangerous. Like, writing a spy novel that's very prosaic or true-to-life can be great, but sometimes you'd rather read (or write) about the one-in-a-million spy story that moves fast and gets super-tense. A Spy Thriller, rather than a Spy Procedural.

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Same thing here. First, kinky sex games that fly way out of control and make even truly-loving couples flirt with disaster/betrayal do happen in real life, even if they're perhaps less common. And second, while it would be wrong to say I *don't care* about realism, it would not be wrong to say I care about kinkiness & erotic intensity at least AS MUCH as realism. Sometimes fantasy and authenticity want to go in different directions ... and sometimes I think it's best to follow the fantasy.

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But, that's me, and I know other people see it differently. I very much appreciate the kind words about my writing, especially as this story is not right up your alley in some way.

With Great writing comes great responsibility. The series has been a lot of fun. Its dark. Its evil. Its titillating! But the consequences are utterly seismic. I mean, once your girlfriend has been so thoroughly fucked it’s impossible to unfuck her. And that’s only the beginning. Mark has been unbelievably (!!!) generous / supportive / self indulgent / naive per his relationship with Chelsea. But there’s a train wreck ahead as he daydreams on the tracks. Meanwhile Dylan and Chelsea, sex god and newly minted lust goddess, have expanded their horizons at Mark’s expense. How to resolve this? Can Mark get new glasses to see what’s happening, then get a spine transplant? Seems unlikely. If things absolutely fall apart, he can get a gun and go rogue. But that would be a poor ending!

It seems as if Mark is now the most critical part of the denouement. He’s the least developed character but has the most at risk. I wish him well. Perhaps you can gift Mark with Houdini-like abilities to cool down the thermonuclear attraction between Dylan and Chelsea? The writing has been absolutely first class. Thank you!

Mark can stand up for himself by insisting that Dylan stop cuming inside Chelsea, citing the pregnancy risk. Maybe Mark realizes that this arrangement is putting his future linage at risk and that spurs him to action. Maybe Dylan listens for a bit at the request of Chelsea...until the wedding night, when Dylan breaks all the rules and completes his conquest of Mark's bride in the honeymoon suite right in front of Mark.

hottest line: "Please. Please, Daddy. Take me, own me, fucking break me! Leave nothing behind for him to... to... oh GOD just do it!"

I'm really more into cheating than cuckolding so the first sex scene is still my favorite... however, you're such a good writer that the rest of the series is enjoyable too, I think my favorite part is Chelsea's inner monologue and how she just can't stop breaking the lines

Maybe the cheating thing is why I'm so into Cody and Nora's side too, getting to see them actually get it on would be sublime. Do it for her if not us :D

Mark can ask for more rules (that are then later broken). If the main question is why doesn't Chelsea leave Mark completely, the answer could be that she can guide Mark to accept her need for Dylan and his role in their relationship while still providing the common interests and more importantly intimacy that he did before. Maybe he could show his value by being a good listener for Chelsea, maybe she has a relationship problem with Dylan and he helps her through it in a friend-zone kind of way.

I feel like this lacks the caring, the concern for Mark in here. Without there still being a caring relationship, this loses all appeal and turns Chelsea into a horrible partner. I'm not going to score this. Because it seems like people who like this sort of thing are gangbusters for it, but it's a big turnoff at this point. Sorry.

Big thank you once again to everyone who's offering their thoughts. I read it all, and I give each comment real consideration.

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shadracht: I appreciate your not downvoting a story because it seems to be going in a direction that's not your cup of tea -- sincerely. If you stick around, it may eventually get back to a place you'd like.

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Mine isn't the only opinion that counts, but I don't see Chelsea as not caring about Mark. I think she's kidding herself, letting confirmation bias run amok, and seeing what she wants to see. Unfamiliar emotions are screwing with her judgment; in fact she's almost an unreliable narrator in her sections ... for now. (Mark too, for that matter.) A full-on "cruel bitch" ending would be so easy to write but, as hot as that might be, I'm aiming for something a bit more complicated.

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And as a general update, I'll admit that work on the fifth (and final?) chapter has slowed a bit. I have the beginning done, as well as an outline for the ending that I'm very happy with, but everything in between is being uncooperative. I've got lots of pieces I like, but there are actually too many of them, and they don't want to fit together.

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Anyway, I promise I'm still working on it, and I will get there.

Well first of all your story is great. Really it is. I read a lot of that kind and my my, yours is for sure one of the very best. It's not just smoking hot, it's well written and well built. These are huge qualities.

Concerning your questions, I don't know if I have any advice about what you should make Chelsea do or not do. I most certainly know what I would like my wife to do and not to do, but hey, that's not necessarily the same thing. These are your characters. At most, I could say what I think is reallistic (from my point of view, but I have quite some experience in that particular line... ahem).

First of all, I think the option that Chelsea would finally leave Mark for Dylan highly unreallistic. Obviously, some girls might very well do that; but they would have to be stupid girls (sorry). To leave Mark for Dylan, one would have to think that life (and sex) with Dylan as a husband, or even a "regular" boyfriend, would be the same as life and sex with Dylan as a lover; and it could just not be so. Sex with Dylan is great for one reason, and one reason only: it's forbidden. It's different. It's out of the rules. The day Dylan becomes Chelsea's "regular" (and monogamous) boyfriend is the day Chelsea starts getting bored with him, especially in bed. Because pleasure comes from excitement, and excitement comes (at least for some people) from doing forbidden things. Dylan is exciting because he is the contrary of routine. The day he becomes routine is the day he ceases to be exciting.

To fail to see that, in my point of view, would defininely mark Chelsea as silly, or at least very blind; and she doesn't strike me as a stupid or blind girl. So much auto-analyze has got to make her understand at least that very simple truth: in bed, one can't have to cake and eat it (or, as we French say it, one can't have the butter and the money you pay it with). Specifically, you can't have the security of a routinely monogamous relationship AND the excitement of extra-marital sex. Not with the same guy at the same time, at least.

So I think Chelsea can't break up with Mark. But of course "tricky emotional developments" have to occur. It's most unlikely Dylan and Chelsea won't fall in love with each other. It already shows at that point of the story, of course. But that doesn't mean they would react in the same way to that feeling. For Dylan, it would be quite simple: he would want Chelsea to break up with Mark, and would do everything in order to achieve that. But for Chelsea, things woulnd't be that simplistic. I know (and that I know from experience) that it doesn't mean she would stop loving Mark. Most likely, she would love both (that I know is quite possible), and would want to abandon nothing. And so I think the most reallistic course for the story is that when Dylan realizes she won't leave Mark for him, at or just after the wedding, he will be the one who will break up with Chelsea, because at one point he's doomed to realize that he will be the one who will suffer most.

Of course, considering the way Chelsea and Dylan act, yes, he would probably leave her with a little "parting present" in her belly.

As to the question whether Mark and Chelsea could get back to the monogamous relationship: probably not. They actually both seem to love that sort of spice in their love life and sex life, and won't stop, even though the end of this particular adventure might be much harder for both of them than they would have expected. They both seem clever people: they would know that this sort of cuckolding relation is indeed dangerous, but that monogamy is actually no less dangerous. It can actually be safer for your wife to sleep or even to fall in love with another guy, but telling you everything all the while, than to get slowly bored with monotony, without even noticing it, and then one day to leave everything suddenly because she fell hard for a new guy and had to deal with that alone.

Well, these are only clues and ideas from hard-earned experience. ^^ But I trust you to build a great ending to this great story. ;-) Thanks again!

Once again, so amazingly well written and constructed. Phew. Lots of gut punches. (BTW Do girls that get that horny exist out there? I'm not saying they don't. I'm just saying I need to get out more!) My favorite part so far--and I'm definitely still in the mental space of this chapter--is the bracelet part. Says it all, doesn't it? Wonderfully inventive literary device, too. If she told him everything would Mark back out? I think when it gets to the point of "I love you"--then it stops being a game. He's starting to notice real emotions for Dylan within Chelsea, but if he knew she wasn't merely saying it, but was feeling it--that's when it turns into the deep end of the ocean, I would imagine. I am actually wondering what's really going thru Mark's head. There has to be a maelstrom inside of him, and he has to be fighting inner demons more than you've allowed him to show thus far. You've tipped his hand very subtly, which I very much appreciate, but within his character development, I'm not sure I really get him--other than how the kink controls him as it controls Chelsea. But then again, as I think further he really is a stand-in for the reader, isn't he? We wouldn't be reading this genre if it didn't move us as it moves him. So I put myself in his place and feel what he feels. So maybe a trip inside Mark's head makes this less involving? After all, I have a very strong feeling Chelsea is doing this to ME. I'm the one engaged to her. I'm the one letting it happen. I'm feeling like that's your intent, and that makes you a very rare author indeed. Especially on Lit. And one last observation--the way you write the Dylan/Chelsea encounters is brilliant. It is what her rush feels like, and why she's addicted. I don't know if you've worked with addiction (sex aside) in life, but you make her craving and release the monster and the god she can't escape. Anyway, thank you--such a wonderful effort. I can't wait to see more.