All Comments on 'How To Embrace What Is'

This is one of the more insightful (and well-written) articles I've read in a while, from any source.

What an unexpected find this article is. I'm going to deeply ponder these words because "settling" has caused me much anxiety (existential angst) over the years. I do count my blessings. Maybe I just need to realize that I have more of them than I previously recognized.

I don't know who Gotleib is but the truth of your observation is compelling. Over the past couple of years I have read and admired your works and points of view. Pretty advanced in my opinion.

I believe that the failing of most relationships(which seems to be the basis of her complaint) stem from having pre-conceived ideas about a thing, feeling or someone and not communicating that idea then having it thwarted by the other who is unawair. From there a person has two choices. One, be upset and unfulfilled and/or two, settle for. The better choice, like you have said, is to take what is and be at cause (create it as if was yours all along)with the thing. As to the issue of woman and men as a couple I say it's a lot of work.

Selena, you're right on target here... well stated, well constructed, well thought out. Insightful, illuminating, intelligent.

I would expect nothing less of you!

Have a great day, take care!

~Sky~

First--Send your article to Ms. Gottlieb and second send it to the letters section of the Atlantic. It is a wonderful piece of writing.

amen, sister!!

what if we settled, got really lucky with an amazing life, yet we cannot "embrace what is" because we long for a previous love that was years ago?

Settling - like love - is all what you make it, tho from complete opposites. My lover is human, therefore she is imperfect. There are things i'm going to have to "settle" for. Sometimes she is worry-prone, intense, thinks that doing something is the same as doing something constructive. I am imperfect as well. She has to "settle" for me being very pragmatic, very deep, there's always a method to my madness tho it make sense only to me until it makes sense to others. Settling, in this regard is nothing more than accepting someone for who she/he is. She's exceeded my expectations in many other areas. I couldn't ask for a better partner. Settling doesn't mean you have to lose your identity, your dignity, nor your sense of right and wrong. Anyone who thinks they're all that and so much more, but can't seem to find a mate for any length of time, usually means they have impossibly high standards for others, yet are willing to give themselves a free pass on their own issues. It's so much easier to point the finger at someone else. That way... they don't have to "settle", or take responsibility, for their own unhappiness...

You are turning the child into your possession, a thing. Murphy Brown was wrong, so are you.

Well, just speaking for myself, after reading a lot of stories at Literotica I REFUSE to settle for anything less than a 12 inch cock!