All Comments on 'The Temptation of Abigail Lawson'

please write chapter two it was a lovely story

You really need an editor, or at least do what I do, step away from the story for a few days, then read through it again. You have a lot of typos that detract from the flow of the story, which is good and sweet.

Not a bad little story but a shame about all the typos and spelling mistakes. Sit back and try to read your work as if someone else has written it, then hopefully you'll pick up all the errors. If this fails you, get another person to read through it. The picture you paint of US Bible Belt bigotry is scary: from all I've read and heard about the Bible Belt, residents won't need to go to Hell when they die, they've been living there all their lives.

OK, I lived in the middle of Kansas for 12 years. This story has a British accent, and very little resemblance to Kansas. There are conservative bible thumpers in Kansas, but what's missing in this story is any resemblance in the manner of speaking with Kansas, or any other part of the midwestern US.

I had to look up "milk bread" because I didn't know what that was. (And I lived in Kansas.) The anti-LGBTQ preacher seems borrowed from any number of stereotypes; for example, the character in "Dirty Dancing."

I had no issue with spelling or typos. There were a few. But every story on this site is riddled with writing mistakes, and this story is actually one of the better ones in that regard. (Maybe Literotica should offer proofreading as a way to improve its own product.)