by UnderYourSpell
Saw this one in the forum. A brave first try. My very subjective response is that stanzas 5 & 6 seem strongest but the envoi seems a puzzle. Perhaps one day I'll have a go at the form — the spreadsheet might make it less formidable.
i mentioned this submission in the New Poem Review thread in the Poetry Forum. please feel free to come along and join in with other poets. the 50% temp rating is so that it does not affect temp rates that follow - wildsweetone
Good, I like to see this language in this form. Some of it is clichéd, but it kind of adds to the charm. Looking forward to what you do outside a form.