- Erotic Poetry
- Lengths of Blue Rope
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Click hereFine, twined hemp dyed
to match the depths of her eyes,
twisted into a garland of little knots
like gathered sighs.
Tied, splined, two-hued—
pale for yearning, rich for mood,
splayed for lessons like a sinner caught
on Andrew's rood.
- COMMENTS
Trixareforkidsover 9 years agoIt works quite well for this piece. A fun little romp with great word play.
twelveooneabout 13 years agovery good, the only thing I would point out, it resolves on an obscure word and obscure reference, tactically not a bad place because the reader has already invested the time, strategically probably bad as it looks more like the insidious I creeping in. i.e. showing what you know, as opposed to the service of the poem. Sonically fine, nice parallels. ie
Fine, twined
Tied, splined
I leave the rest for others, just my opin.
but I point out, a comment probably better then those left by those who damn for them, and right now
I'm inclined
not to.
But apeing another comment left on mine, did it take you more then a few hours?
