All Comments on 'Mingled'

scratch, snag, bruise, force - This pome has some brutal moments amidst a relaxing romantic scene of drinking wine.

bare skin glides through fabric - This is poetic splendidness.

All making for an odd concoction that you pulled off without a hitch.

Hehe ..... I said concoction ...........

I.m easy, despite what every one says

OK S1 fine. nice pacing.

sharp senses would be a noun phrase - now, I' m not sure of what these things are:

senses sharp

resistance dulled

depths sought

go ask a grammar maven, but they look like metal laziness to me, and are rather common in new writers -the net effect for me is

poetry wrote

poetry read

reader bored...it looks affected, here

"stut-"

also. overdone effect

force me down

to taste of your spice

clover bites apple sweet

a boiled treat of salt lick

......Cunnilingus as Poetry : I fived , Tod .

I had trouble with S3 tod:

"your lips soft

then teeth as

leather slips through loops..."

gave me the impression that teeth are soft.

"your ardour bruises my neck

marks me as your property"

great lines there.