by SweetOblivion
Nicely written, except for the frequent line breaks. Maybe it's just me, but when I read it with imagined line breaks fewer in number and with certain line ending words, it flowed for me better.
"spotlit bruise" great juxtaposition
"...ablaze with shadows" confusing to me.
Intriguing, and so well composed. Personally, I so enjoy this nature of style that invites interpretation and whets the imagination.
There are some really memorable lines, especially lines 4 and 5 of stanza 2. I felt you could sharpen a few other lines but it is a good read. Ty
Good solid imagery which is engaging enough to take the reader on a ride. Nice.