All Comments on 'A Boilerplate Rendering Ch. 03'

Top 5 best LW story EVER. Hell I even understood what was going on in the wife's head.... How the 30s getting older let me makes changes mutated into something else.

In this perfect chapter the conversation between john and karen is sooo critical because she didnt see how or why the superficial changes in her appearance were symptomatic of much bigger marriage ending issues. Once she saw that and understood.... She finally saw how much damage had been done.

Goddam fucking fabulous story.

You have me agreeing with Harry. I'm thinking there is a blizzard down below or something. He is right though. This was a hell of a story very well written. Even more interestingly...you ended it. Oh! I have a few questions but really this story ended how and when it should have. It was simply a painful, well written, exploration of human relationships.

It is really one of the very best.

Thank you

It was a great ending because I didn't ever get a handle on it. I would think it was going in one direction then it would jump back. I don't agree with everything in it but it was all tied together so well that my complaints are best kept too myself.

Well done 5*

This sums it all up:

"...There's a special kind of love that a parent has for a child that decides everything. And maybe that sounds strange, or a little scary, but it's also better than anything else you'll ever know..."

"John obviously, is not me. He doesn't talk like me, think like me, or behave like me. He doesn't always agree with me. That's not his function. But I admit that I didn't fully bother to understand him, either." - You seem to know John pretty well, you have recognized some truths about life that few men other than men like John truly understand.

Men like John, they deserve to be noted. Frequently they are taken for granted. Often it isn't until years later when children have now become adults and have faced the challenges of life, they realize what their fathers did for them.

Thank you for writing John's story

This is very pathetic story.He is a vimp , idiot, moron

1*

I have to hand it to you. You wrote an excellent tale. Kudos to ST also. However there is no way that the children would be unaffected by the situation. The mother cheating, the father carrying his rage and pain inside would have shown brightly and the kids would be damaged. A more realistic ending would have the skank killing herself or the father just taking off with the kids.

This takes nothing away from this tale. I look forward to many more "unoriginal" tales. Thanks.

Five Stars

That was incredibly well written. I don't think I've ever read a story where I thought to myself "I could almost forgive her." Perfect ending, mirrors real life far more accurately then revenge and a happy ending.

I enjoyed the story but the ending left me rather flat. The lack of information on what happened to Carl was also annoying but this is not a major criticism. I feel that the the chapter was unbalanced. It was shown that the wife made great efforts to prove her contrition, including taking some embarrassing steps. And then right at the end of the chapter, and very abruptly, she goes off and lives alone, albeit visiting the family home every day. It is as if the author suddenly decided that a full reconciliation would have made John a wimp after all. When I finished reading, I just went "oh!"and was left a little disappointed. But I don't really know why. Perhaps it is because both characters eventually deserved better in some way.

In the first chapter I commented about some of the best authors on lit leaving their impressions, and quickly, in just one day. That was an indicator of a good story. Now, we have Harry understanding the story, not hating the cuckold... Gawd, this must be great.

Now, about the story. This chapter is, for me, the weakest. The story was fleshed out in the first two, and this was more of a falling forward, in the sense that it does not add anything new within the story. In the first two, every word counted, was necessary (and THAT is good writing), but my feeling is that this last installment could be summarized. Don't misunderstand me, the story overall is a hall of famer, the last chapter is correct, and i loved it. But...

Anyway, Kudos. Go on writing. Please. We miss the longhorns, dqs'... and you seem to be in their league.

Overall, this is a very solid story. Very powerful emotions. A great first effort. However, I was really annoyed at the failure to mention what happened to Carl. And then this: "Ahh, but I didn't tell you about that, now, did I?" It's like the author is teasing the reader in a smug and annoying way by not explaining things.

The husband had told the wife that she needed to get some kind of revenge of Carl. Did she, aside from what happened at the one party where Carl got shamed? Because of that, it's important not just for the reader to know something bad happened to Carl, but what that was exactly, and did the wife play a role in it. To not mention it was like the author was giving the readers a big "fuck you." Or is Carl's shaming at the party supposed to be all of Carl's revenge? If so, that's very weak tea, and the author did a bad job in explaining things clearly. Very perplexing. But other than that, great work.

I know I can be dense at times but I can't seem to figure out from what you wrote what happened to Carl. And what did Karen do after she left John? So many questions... 5*

...but it's a damned good one. You did a really good job of conveying the emotions, and that's something a lot of authors never quite figure out how to do. Yes, there were a number of minor technical flaws, but they didn't detract from the story all that much. Five stars on this one.

He was never going to throw her out because he wouldn't be responsible for finally tearing the family apart... He gave in to his baser urges and she thought she finally had a chance to reconcile, but all it showed her was it was never, ever going to be what it was and he was just using her for the act. He couldn't go forgive.

Since he wouldn't split and hurt the daughters and there was no chance of reconciling and every day was more misery, she finally gave up. At least he got some respect in the end and she got some respect for herself back.

People need closure, they need to either forgive or they don't and move on. John didn't. As a result, he made himself miserable and he made his wife equally miserable and is that the example he wanted to teach his children?

People will heat on their spouse. People will lie to their loved ones. People will hurt the ones they love because we are all people and we are imperfect. Subsequently, holding onto pain and wearing it like a suit of armour only does one thing, isolate you from being hurt but it also prevents you from feeling love. After all, you can only experience the heights of love from the depths of despair and isolating yourself only prevents that.

Nonetheless, I gave this a 5 because people aren't perfect and John did the best he could even if it was shitty of him to use the children as a weapon against his wife. She betrayed him with Carl, he betrayed her with THEIR children.

... you've managed to write a story without either BTB or reconciliation, just sadness and pain. Personally, my life is depressing enough that I don't want to invest in such a story as this which really, at the end of the day, didn't have much of a pay-off. Better luck, next time.

The author spent a lot of time and brainpower trying to determine a revenge on Carl that would be effective, but not take the reader outside the character or feel inconsistent with the person he had created. I was the one who advised him that consequence was established in the way that Carl lost his friends, but as the scope of the story is about the fight to protect the children and the narrator (ostensibly the character) never even thinks about Carl unless he's in the room, a winding addition about revenge would have felt like a grafted limb. Carl is almost nonexistent in the narrator's mind and heart. He doesn't even deserve the saliva it would cost us to spit.

I also argued (and I still feel this way) that Uno had already invited everybody in for rewrites, revisions, and additions way back at the very start...so the best thing to do was imply that more was done to Carl, but don't clutter this story with it. Let the reader imagine. Let someone else write a revenge story around it. Or, hell, write a fourth part just about that someday when you're itchy.

But this is a good arc, and that story doesn't belong here. Let it be.

This was one of the BEST stories on this site. Now, my top three Loving Wives authors are Rehnquist, DanielQSteel, and the UNORIGINALIST!!!. That story was so profound that I wish I could forget it so I can read it all over again for the first time.

Both characters were fundamentally flawed and very human. They were so 3 dimensional and well rounded that I could actually see them in my mind's eye. She was a cheater and very selfish, but I could not give up hope that they would make it. It was up and down. Will they, won't they? I'm glad that they were able to part as friends. It isn't the best ending, but I feel that it is realistic and consistent with how things were going.

Some people were put off by not knowing what happened to Carl. I wasn't. If you notice, there were a lot of things that didn't get hashed out. This is how life REALLY works. We didn't get the blow by blow on her sexual excursions. We didn't get the detailed explanation about how he seduced her. As far as everything has gone in the story, we simply knew that it happened. Same with the revenge. Of course we would want to know the intimate details so that we can feel the sense of justice. But by not telling what he did, that kept in line with this character's personality. He wasn't a person who gloats. He always played his cards close to the chest. So someone like him would simply keep things like that quiet. Like everything else, just knowing that it happened is enough.

This was a story with a main character who had one driving force, his children. Carl and his future means nothing at the end because he didn't end the marriage Karen and her decisions did.

I commend you on ending it the way you did. No ow chases a dream our the past forever. I think the truest way to end the story is the way you did otherwise you would of pandering to one aside our the other.

While well written, the husband came across as being a bit shallow and the children as "huh?".

Sorry, but unless they have some significant maturity and outside activities they excel and can really focus on, the children will very likely be affected to a much greater degree than you portray.

BTDT, BTFTS.

Keep writing.

Your story hit close to home and I likely read this, likely hell - I did, paradigmed by my emotion.

I look forward to your future tales.

Thx.

Very well written!! However, John needed to grow up.

but I just couldn't bring myself to reading this story, fully, or to liking it.... it is such a horrifically boring, slow, stagnated, repetitive, boring, stagnated, repetitive story of two incredibly boring, slow, stagnated, repetitive, UNLREAL (trying to be too real, as the author WANTED it done here, in this story... is UNREAL)...

I can't rate it more than 2 stars.

Writing style is actually very good.

Unfortunately, the pseudo psychoanalysis between the two was such a turn-off for me.... especially having just finished a story as well written as EQUATION, by "oshaw".... a story that I actually hoped, when I got to the last page, apge 6, that it WOULD continue on longer.... as I wanted it to continue ....

but this story, BOILERPLATE... reading each paragraph, even the really tiny ones, is like reading 8 pages of the same pseudo psychological BS between two people who don't seem to do anything except spending days having the most boring conservations with each other, conversations in which THEY pretended to be some other people trying to solving complex, unsolvable problems....

THAT is very intolerably boring...

For the anonymous commenter who wondered about Carl's punishment, it was addressed in the story. In short, he, too, ended up alone. He lost not only her, but all their friends - their social circle. For someone who measured himself by his ability to participate with others and influence others, it was a punishment to lose control over his own life and happiness. As the story said, it was all the harder because he probably did it to himself as a way to avoid conflict - others didn't shun him, he shunned himself.

We didn't get to see Carl's suffering the way we saw the husband and wife suffer, but he suffered at least as much as he would have from a crippling assault in a dark alley.

Karen matured, took responsibility and grew.

John maintained his resolve.

Carl? It's enough to know where he isn't.

I have an imagination and can flesh out anything I want.

A solid 5 and kudos.

Wonderful way to wrap it up. Looking forward to more of your submissions

HDK’s Yesterday has long been one of my favorites among his many fine works. I told him that it should be on SOL too and it magically appeared there. This piece expands and amplifies that story in a brave new way and you should be proud of this effort. A couple of very minor distractions did nothing to lessen the power of the emotions contained here. You obviously have great insight into human relationships and convey the suffering of the husband in this story who is struggling to protect his children while teaching his wayward wife a valuable lesson about selfishness and real love. I have given 5s to much less deserving stories and wish I could do more. I look forward to your next foray into this arena.

would have liked it more if they would have gotten back together. She finally got it. She did repent. She did atone but the husband's heart was stone. He could not have asked for more from her after she finally understood. For husband it was too late and it probably was when she continued the affair after he confronted her the first time. However, he really never gave her much of a chance after that did he?

So we have what maybe a realistic story but not one that is a feel good story. I like feel good stories.

Anonymous 1.

COMPLETELY and totally unrealistic.

Most women consider children as SOLE possessions.

Fathers are usually only tolerated interlopers.

Besides the fact that 99% of women would not have tolerated living in such a toxic environment as their house had become after the affair occurred, at the FIRST HINT that her bonds with her children were fading and those of the husband's were getting stronger, and assuming, like in this story, the mother knew she could not undo the damage she had done, most women would IMMEDIATELY divorce the husband KNOWING she would get physical custody which would weaken the husband's bonds and re-streighten her own with her children.

Besides wanting to hurt her "ex", WHY do you think women try their damnest so that the father has AS LITTLE interaction with his children as possible after a divorce??

To minimze the importance of the relationship.

Others may not like the ending but it is your story to tell. It is good to not have it be like so many others with retribution and revenge on the offending spouse and their partner in crime and a new person stepping in to take the place of the offender and make everything right. I like and envy the strength of John to find his own way and stick to it. We don't have to like or agree with his position. Keep writing and keep them different from the norm.

As an emotional pain junkie, this story really took me.

To understand the depth of the emotion husband felt, you only have to read the comments in the wives section every day. These guys just can't get over what has been done to them and neither can the husband in this story. Dead is dead and wife really killed this relationship for all time. When he told her she was not his wife, he basically said she, his wife, was dead. She tried to bring wife back to life, but dead is dead.

Some people just can't recover from a painful experience. As husband said, he fell from a great emotional height and did not survive.

5 *****

Everything but the ending worked for me. The emotions you brought to the story were so amazing that words cannot describe. Damage was done by both sides and sometimes that might be too much to bear for any one person but the things that she did to try and atone for her mistake should have been enough for him to try and work through it. That's just the female in me I guess...

Anyway thank you so much for sharing and for the record not unoriginal at all.

You have just become a favorite of mine. Five stars. This was tremendous. The emotional authenticity drew me in to the point of identifying with the main character. When the wife confronted him about her moving out I felt my heart drop. Yes, I was almost to the point of tears. That's quality writing. I understand your ending, but in my mind I was running to grab hold of the wife for fear of losing her. It felt like a breakthrough moment where the tide could have shifted to total reconciliation. The wife went from cold hearted bitch to seemingly genuine in her attempts to win her husband back. I really felt that at that point she needed rescuing just as much as he did. But, one cannot argue with their own feelings. He was clearly scared deeply, and in the end it fits that he hadn't moved on and found someone else. It was all about his kids.

However, I haver never read a story where the spouse went into such self destruction. To me it looked like he did all he could to inflict as much pain as possible on both, including himself. Sorry, but in my view, not a sensible way to handle infidelity.

you have to tell us the ending and what happened to the lover and your wife!!!!

Thanks so much for this fully realized, very sad and totally absorbing story. Among its many many virtues--its insight, its psychological detail, its many shatteringly powerful moments--is the fact that right up til very near the end of the final chapter, the reader was held in total suspense as to how it would end. There were certainly clues, but nothing definitive--even though in hindsight one could look back and say, "oh, it had to go that way."

Please continue to write stories--you have already acquired a devoted set of readers who will be waiting to see what you write next!

Thanks, ohio

I don't know more now than when I started reading this. So what happened?????

An excellent story, well-written and engrossing. The tension was sustained throughout and the ending was terrific. Several of the reconciliation stories written by some of my LW icons Ohio, Slirpuff and Just Plain Bob could have been enhanced and become more credible with this type of conclusion. The better the description of the heartache the harder it is to believe a 'forgive and forget' ending.

These characters were very realistic, his deep pain, her slow appreciation of what she had done to her family and, particularly, the children's' 'Watch, absorb but don't say much' stance-quite typical in these cases I've found. I liked her spirited refusal to become a doormat in their conversations. However, the public confession scene was OTT. How much should you embarrass your friends to gratify your need for confession? Not that much!

The story was a resounding refutation of the idea that LW stories are stale and boring because 'it's all been said before'. Please write a lot more.

This is a cross of Chuck fantasy and completely unrealistic human behavior. One star

that his was a very well told story, believable, clear and resolved (in every way except for Carl---but who cares?). It is certainly The Unoriginalist right to create his characters and their end any way he desires (see McEwen's end to Atonement as to how far an author can go in that regard), but I cannot be happy with the close of the story. I see no real reason why the parents of the two girls cannot end happier and more complete in each other. The ending given here leaves two intelligent, caring people sad, alone (in one real way) and , in at least one way, unfulfilled, both suffering for her now atoned for and learned from mistake. It doesn't have to be like that!!!!! People ought to be able to get over any tragedy including the self-administered sin of cheating.

This story gets a hearty and deserved "5" though I hated its close!

This is a well-written, gripping, emotional, human story that carries the reader on a compelling journey. It intertwines the complexities of love and life, of selflessness and selfishness. And NO, John is definitely not a wimp. Real life is quite complex.

Tiny Tim

There's just something about this story that compelled me to read it through. It's unsettling and leaves a lot of questions in my mind as to the goals and the eventual outcome. It just seems to be too real, as if the author has actually lived this story. I...somehow wish the poor bugger would find some happiness.

Not sure what to write in regard to this chapter and the overall story. It was a compelling read and I was glad to see part three today. I felt like this chapter fizzled a little. With all the drama and tension set up in the first two chapters it was a bit if a let down for them to meekly walk away from it. It is probably as real as it could get but in a story I felt there was a lack of something stronger. In reality it could have been a side bar paragraph about something in regard to Carl. Actually, it could have been that simple to play off the way it ended. In the end they were both true to their kids and, ultimately, true to ghe personalities you gave them. I kept waiting for a reconciliation in the "time heals all wounds" tradition but you made sure that he was really and truly done with her. Even though she learned from her mistakes she was true herself and was not as strong and patient as he was, thus why she was so easily swayed in the first place and why she "blinked" first. Why not give us an accounting of Carl? Of all the things you chose to go and not do I'm think that one was a cheap and easy way out. I rarely give 5* but in spite of the problems listed above I think this story deserves that many. I hope you will write again.

No winners here ,just two humans with a lot of pain and no reconciliation . Sad ending but a great story none the less. Life goes on , if one can forgive and make up it would be better.!

TUO: This was a remarkable tale, spun well, riveting, provocative yet vulnerable.

That's a pretty tall order for a short story on Literotica.

Towards the last, here on page 4: "These days, I find that I feel the world is a cup full of suffering. It makes me sad to remember the ways that I have helped to keep it full."

That is poignant, it wraps things up so well. I realize you were about to talk about the other family, but actually it also included his and his wife's misery. Just, so well done.

5* from me. Thank you for writing.

Best regards,

-Pultoy

Good read, I do wish it had been released all at the same time. Breaking up story's tends to breakup the flow of the plot. The story to me was not so much about how it ended as much as it was about what a "MAN" is willing to go through to hold his Family together for his Children. Been there, done that and have no regrets. When you assume the roll of a parent your life and feelings become second place to your children's well being. How anyone can walk away from that responsibility is beyond my comprehension.

FIVE and FAVORITE -

Masterful. I have read the comments to date and find a large number of IDed commenters who agree. Interesting that BOTH BtB and Reconciles tend to be of that same opinion (along with a fair number of Anons!) I am amazed that a few thought it was terrible ... probably the kind who think Romeo & Juliet is poor literature because they don't like the ending! Oh well! That's why they make puce-colored toilet paper - no accounting for taste!

Hubby (as I thought I saw earlier) did not act directly on Sweetie, and certainly not on Her Bull, either (until the mystery revenge mentioned in passing at the end of this final chapter.) One commenter took issue, claiming Hubby 'used the kids' against their Mother. I prefer to think of it as 'continuing to pick up the existing slack from Sweetie's waning familial attention!' Something Hubby was doing BEFORE awareness of her dalliance. Did he become more deliberate with 'kid time,' such as rescheduling the zoo and going to Disney when he figured out she was neglecting her job and had exhausted her vacation time? Sure! And it WORKED! We were not told (because neither her PoV nor Carl's was provided) about how her time with Her Bull went during Disney-time, but I continue to think it was miserable for her, and less than ideal for Bull! In short, Hubby did it ALL by being true to his top priority.

One grinch I would make is that there were SEVERAL instances, such as the Staring Party and when Sweetie got bitchy (after the Bull break-up), when Hubby coulda-shoulda reminded her that she was happier when she and Bull where 'getting it on.'. Plus, Hubby started by acknowledging his approval of her improved attitude (whenever she DID deign to be around her family) when he disclosed his awareness of her affair! AND, neither then or any later time, demanded or even hinted that she stop the affair! THAT was a valuable trump card he didn't play again.

At her first demand that he stop staring at Bull, I would have preferred he say something like 'He's mad at me because he thinks I am forcing you to stay near me! YOU are ALSO not happy to be with me instead of being pounded in his bed! I don't want or need your criticism of where I look! Why don't you leave? Carl will follow you out, I will tell our host you developed a headache and I'm going to follow you home!" It would have reinforced the idea that peaceful co-existence was the objective, NOT atonement and marital resumption!

I loved it when, after things had been peaceful for a good while, Hubby brought up their eventual divorce. It was NOT mentioned that Sweetie's later move to a separate apartment involved divorce (I suspect it did NOT!) but I am sure she resumed a more circumspect dating pattern (without Carl)

Sad that he allowed himself to be sexually emasculated! Hubby certainly maintained his manhood in all other respects, especially parental! Sad overall, but very POWERFUL!

That's all there was ever going to be. It just took a while to figure that out.

Even people who say they can get over it really can't. They may limp along for years or decades or a lifetime but the hurt never goes away.

As our hero said, people who say they can get up and brush themselves off and move on never really had far to fall. The more you love, the more you have to lose. That's not an argument against love. It's just reality.

There was absolutely no hint in the story that it had anything at all to do with SirThopas, but when you mentioned it, it wasn't at all a surprise that you two would be involved in a story. The same dark thoughts, consistent with the inconsistent human mind.

John's dark motions were those of an animal driven by instinct. Karen was the more interesting and capable of growth. But both were very real.

"November passed like an illness. It lingered too long, distorting the passage of time, and when it left us we were more exhausted and weaker than we'd ever been before." Jesus...people who write like this are available to me on a daily basis here. That's unbelievable.

I got only one thing to say. Compared to the rest of loving wives posted today and all last week, hell for months actually, this was a damn good read. Compare this to the wimpy cuckold tales where men like to watch their wives being used, this was a story of self-inflicted pain, who among us really know how to handle an affair until it hits us between the eyes. Revenge sounds so macho, but do men really pound on their chest and roar. Doubtful. This was different, this story kept one gripped to reality. How does one love the one that meant most to him and betrayed him like this wife did. If I was in this characters shoes, would I have done the same, I don't know. Good story line, different, kept one in suspense of how it would end. I almost felt sorry for them when they parted. Good read. Thanks. Finally a new author worthy of reading. Welcome to Literotica. Hope you write many more. We need good writers to take the misery out of what loving wives has become. 5 stars. (ML)

I agree this story is excellent, against I prefer such caracters better who heals up quicklier from a cheating wife with a newer woman happily.

First it all he won the children custody his wife gave it up in the story, because she saw,she approved and she persuaded herself her husband was the better parent than she.

Second many commenters wrote in the second sequel, she will give it up with divorce documents in the true life. The author wrote this plot, she gave it up....

Third very few men could do this with telling his cheating wife he knows everything.

It may be a husband had true declered or non declered open marriage or the husband remained untill the kids could come to his flat freely daytime (16 years old kids) and he began the divorce that time, but in these cases the husband dag his knowledge about her wife's affair underground untill the divorce document handing day.

TheUnoriginalist,

The only problem with your first story being such a hit with some of the most discerning and demanding readers on this site is what do you do for an encore! Of course, you could write an epilogue where you share Karen's thoughts and actions after she moved to the apartment; John's adjustment to being the primary caregiver for two teenaged daughters (and their prospective boyfriends); their decision for a legal separation or even a divorce before their well-adjusted daughters leave for college; any future successful or doomed relationships for Karen and John, apart or even back together; and of course how they feel, think, and act toward each other as they age and share two son-in-laws and grandchildren. (And, if you really want to satisfy some readers "who desperately need to know," share some of those unpublished ideas about what happened to Carl.)

Emotion, not logic, is the cornerstone of this story. We cannot make self-centered decisions without eventually affecting those around us we claim to love. Karen could certainly have ended her affair with Carl as soon as John demanded she continue it. She could have confronted Carl with an ultimatum to marry her and become a great stepfather. She could have confronted John to divorce her and still be a great dad with their daughters. Divorced spouses can still be great, caring parents. (If you can share effective parenting when physically separated as Karen and John apparently did, then you can be just as effective as legally separated spouses. And isn't that a more honest role model for maturing adolescents?)

When an author makes the reader care about the characters, experience their pain and pleasures, empathize with the consequences of their personal decisions, and wonder about their futures, you have succeeded becoming the archetype of an excellent writer. Congratulations.

Wow!

Only the seemingly trucated ending detracts from the whole.

You know someone is a very good writer when folks that don't like the plot comment

on how well written it is, we could not stop reading.

I expect many more from TheUnoriginalist .

I am very much a

AMerryMan

You know, I didn't really want to get into this, since the ending seemed satisfying, but I had the same thought as anonymous did. This story could almost become a series. It doesn't have to end here. His observation make a lot of sense. Will he remain bitter until death, or will time heal the wounds. Just fantasy, I guess that what makes a story. Again. Good entertainment. Thank you. (ML)

Given the emotional level of the whole story, I thought the ending was pretty dull.There was never any clarity on their marital status, just that she was moving out but coming home every night. What does that even mean?Another thing that does not make sense to me is that after they finally started to have sex did she not try more to recapture her husband.I get that he was emotionally detached from her but she seemed like she still wants the best of both worlds and perhaps that is the point of the story.

Despite my previous comment when I expressed my fear that this might end in reconcilliation, I found my expectations slowly changing during this chapter. She rose morally, he shrunk at the same time being just stubborn. But I think that impresion was just instigated by the fact that we readers did not get the full blow of her betrayal and always tend to forget the beginning of a longer story when it gets to the end.

I just hope with many other commenters that a further story by UNO will appear very soon - one could get addicted to stuff like this. But I also would not regret it if another author would try his best in writing an alternative ending (as UNO encourage to do so in the very beginning). But whoever would try - it is very difficult to compete with this one! The characters are so scillfully worked out, that it would take a master to write an acceptable alternative outcome.

As some other commenters already mentioned: this story would deserve better than the humble 5* I am allowed to give.

What happened to Carl? That was a teaser thrown in the revenge crowd-but really other than some social ostracization, what did he suffer?

Very sad tale, very good at describing the end result of the original treachery.

Fantastic page turner, didnt want it to end. you are one hell of a writer.

He fucked the whore....bad move. Carl got away scot free. I know you left it to imagination as to what happened to Carl but I think you copped out. That cost this story a star and I so wanted to give it all five. Between you and Saxon Hart we've gotten something good to read these past few days. Thanks for your time spent on this. I hope your next one is just as good.

I very much appreciate the effort that clearly went in to this excellent tale. It was moving, and not at all "boilerplate."

I hope that you'll indulge me in a few minor criticisms. That bit of dialogue involving the daughters wasn't up to the standards of the harrowingly realistic conversations in the rest of the story. Perhaps it was because the daughters were never really introduced as characters to us, though I suppose they didn't really need to be, as the story was all about the dynamic between their parents.

Still, with the rest of the story being such a masterpiece, I feel that the daughters he struggled so deeply for might have deserved to show a bit more personality in that scene. You did manage the job of conveying what he had protected them from; and that his efforts were not in vain.

My other minor quibble concerns Carl. I think, as a whole, this chapter lacked the punch of the first two. That could have been addressed by at least hinting a little more strongly about what he had done to Carl. I think going into detail at the end may have derailed the story arch, but it would have fit perfectly into the story if inserted just before the couple resumed sexual relations. Getting his "getback" on the man who had helped destroy his marriage could have played into the impetus of resuming a sex life (such as it was) with his wife. Perhaps it would have been a bit trite for his revenge to make him feel "more of a man" but it would also have been very natural and realistic, while satisfying our curiousity which had been piqued by that line about Carl at the end of chapter one, but not interfering with the ultimate direction of the story.

All that aside, this was compelling from start to finish, and one of the very best stories on this site. The ending was, as promised, true to the characters. Hall of Fame worthy, without a doubt. Well done, and please continue writing.

Cog

This is a first for me. I always prefer a BTB ending when reading a LW story told in the victim's voice. The cheater is usually a one dimensional figure with few redeeming qualities and the victim is a saint who didn't deserve the pain. Not in this story. You filled out John and Karen's characters well; a reader would come away feeling like they were real people. John was clearly depressed upon learning of his wife's affair and needed help. Karen couldn't help him and should have insisted on getting him to a doctor. He wasted away, did nothing for himself, cut himself off from all sexual activity and was only interested in his daughters. This is a prescription for misery even for the best of fathers. You may have lots of love for your children but you can't smother them or expect your relationship with them alone make your life worthwhile. Kids grow up and move on and have lives of their own. John will be a lonely old man unless he makes major changes in his life.

Karen fucked up and worked at trying to heal him and their marriage. John makes internal noises to himself but never says or does anything to try to bring reconciliation to their relationship. The only time he tells her he was happy with her actions was when she humiliated herself by confessing her affair in front of her friends. I don't know how Karen could have stuck around John as long as she did. There is no way the girls didn't notice that something was wrong between mom and dad. John was never going to get better and made no effort. So I guess this is a long way of saying that I appreciate your work and that this is the first story I've read that gave equal weight to the development of the characters, cheater vs. cheated. The cheater in this story seemed to be a better person and the cheated turned himself into a sad sexless cuckold with not much to live for. A very sad story indeed.

As a story it was great, if it had been real life I am not sure what to think. I understood he was doing it for the children, but children are not that insulated from family life that the parental problems would not have been evident and there was little in the story to indicate that. The wife was and still is IMHO a cheater and deserves a lot of pain and suffering, not an apartment, a job and a loving family at home to check in with. The husband, truly hurt himself when he let, forced, the cuckoldry to continue. As for Carl, what the hell, he gets a little embarrassed and gets to ride off into the sunset to chase another wife? Again, a great story, very well written with some minor issues, please keep writing, I will keep reading!

This was an excellent story and made some important points......Well done.

Thank you for one of the best stories in this site.

In turns out that, as I wrote in a comment for part 2, "...this impossibly torturous situation forces her character to develop, ironically at the same time that it excises her husband's feelings for her...".

A bittersweet ending, but quite realistic. The wife's character developed and changed to a better and wiser person. John however was stuck, unable to move on and be whole again. There is no mention of their lives after the divorce, but it seems obvious that he never regains his ability to love and trust. A life wasted, and as noble as the aim of the children's happiness seems to be, everyone has the right to live for themselves too, not only for their loved ones. He failed the challenge to transform his own character so that he finds happiness again either with his repented wife or with someone else. He never asked for all this, but life has a way of thowing curve balls at us.

If one story ever deserved 5*, surely this is it, for the writing, the emotion it conveys, the analysis of the characters and true to life development.

It is a very good story, but we feel like to be very good story among the average nowdays LW stories. Yes Mauna Kea is high mountain from the sea level, but Mount Everest is the highest. I think Longhorn07, Vulcez, Papatoad, SS06 and FrancisMacomber's excellent revenge stories are better for a Revenge story fan, than this. However I hope my opinion has not any negative iniciative to you to write newer stories for us. I hope you find such plot for next story, where the betrayed husband finds love happines above earning the custody of the kids.

I find myself agreeing with Harry in VA

You did a great job of telling how things go wrong for both parties, for different reasons. Many would say he should have got out, but it isn't only women who love their kids.The staying meant that he endured more hurt and guaranteed that it would not end well.

I loved the fact that you were brave enough to say that he went off sex completely as opposed to the macho style (I fucked whatever I could or I married my right hand) I think yours was a more realistic situation.

You told the story beautifully, I am extremely jealous.

P.S. Frontlinecaster will report it for being in the wrong category and having no sex. I'm glad I found it.

Apparently, a lot of people like this sad ass story. I was not one of them.

A sad, awful, and quite wonderful story. The complexities are endless, just as they are in life.

Great tale in my view. I liken good LW to Crime scene csi vegas, I enjoy good crime/ murder mysteries, that doesn't mean i advocate murder, i just enjoy the hunt for the perpetrator. I like this kind of story best where we have a cheater and an undeserving victim followed by the resolution and/or hunt for proof of infedelity. Good story, thanks for writing but next time Carl needs some boots to the balls.

First of all, this is a truly excellent story - it has me projecting my own experiences on it, which is something I try not to do... your skill is very high.

Something I would like to mention, which I believe is in the text but not highlighted (which is something I might do differently) is the ability of a person to read the body language of someone they are focused on. It was clear from the description in the story that she was in love with Carl. No kidding - it happens. She was bouncy, she made major changes, she was happy with Carl - if not at home, then in the videos. John would clearly see that - he would see the love in her. And then there is seeing the sex...

It happened to me - it felt like all of my internal organs were scrapped out. I lost the feeling in my hands. It was so obvious that when I was waiting for a bus to get out of there a stranger stopped and offered me a lift.

Some time later I mentioned that I had dropped by to the lady in question, and seen her and him through the window and she said that I shouldn't do that... no kidding. Needless to say, we are not together now. Then again, neither are they.

I like the symmetry in the story - in the sense that they finally do reconcile... you say what? Yes, but they are not together. He specified what he would suggest for what she should do. He started off by saying if he were she he would leave... and finally, at the end of the story, she does... and threatens to kill John if he kept the kids away from her. At that point, they were reconciled. Just not together, and they never will be. The smile almost split his face. In fact, she did everything he suggested... and so the reconciliation was possible. But still... they have to be apart. Of course!

I don't know. In the real world, could they get back together? If we had world enough, and time... but we don't. And there is not enough time left for them, and the damage done would be unavoidable in any future relationship, and so they probably shouldn't.

Gack! What am I doing, interpreting the story for strangers? A very good story - I am carried away. Congrats, and thanks...

Sincerely,

Green-something

This one is a milestone. I did not see this coming. I did not think it possible to give this story such a change. Brilliant work, deductive, psychologically oand logically sound. You deserve 5 Stars after all.

I would love to read this story through Karen's POV. There is another story in itself. The gaps left in this story due to limited information on the husband's part could make very interesting reading. We could hear how she was seduced, what she felt when her husband proposed the deal, how she was dealing with the affair and the gradual decline, the specifics of the "game" at the barbeque, the hour long conversation they had on the phone, and of course what happened while she was alone for the week that everyone was gone to Disney Land.

The pictures and emotions drawn in this writers work are surely impressive. I agree with everything positive that was said about. ***** But it is difficult to believe that the children were unharmed in this emotional turmoil. In the long run it has to have negative effect, if only at the subconscious level. The feeling of depression would be alleviated if some of the happy moments with the children were drawn in more detail.

Perhaps the wife should move back in when they become teenagers. I know that is the old role model theory, but----

She outed Carl as a very capable serial seducer of married women in front of all the neighborhood husbands.

That might qualify as hurting the person she cheated with.

She outed herself as a cheater, as a lesson in shame.

She did as he told her when she asked what he would do to try to make things right.

Great story-telling. It's hard to take self-indulgent psycho crap and make a coherent readable story, but you did. "Yesterday" was crazy ridiculous, this story is just batshit crazy insanely ridiculous. But good writing man, really good writing. Hope you write more.

And for those unable to grock my critique think of it this way, sacrificing yourself for others is noble, destroying yourself to hurt others is pathetic. John's delusions run deep and strong, his intention of protecting his kids - his only articulated goal - by hanging in there assumes that his kids are so monumentally oblivious as to not sense what's going on between mom and dad. BULLSHIT. Kids know, kids get it it, this fantasy exists solely within John's head. That his wife throws the towel, moves out, gives up custody WITHOUT THE SLIGHTEST STRUGGLE in classic BTB fantasy. Never gonna happen in real life...no fucking way.

John was a strong introvert with deep personal convictions. He and Karen both realized in late chapter 2 that he was totally done. She might have had a slim chance up until that point. It is interesting to note at the end he started liking Karen again. But like is not love and unfortunately cannot and will never totally replace the emotion called love. My personal convictions do not run that deep. However I can and do understand the personalities like Johns. Hell I share them. Other than like he had no other positive feelings for her. He would have been happy to continue on at least until the girls were through school. I'll disagree with the author on what that result does to the family dynamic and I will add my own personal "John" experience later. Karen at the end made the wiser choice as sooner or later the children would have noticed the lack of warmth between the adults. It would have affected them and their adults lives would be even more bent. If the author so chooses I would love to see a short story someday on the life status of all characters say 10 years after this point in time. It would be an interesting parallel to my own.

I like the authors statement where the more the love the greater the fall when fidelity is involved. Perhaps that is why my fall was a relatively short one. Around 2000 and about a year after the birth of our son my then wife decided she no longer wished to sleep with me but she would do her "wife duty" if asked. I know she wasn't cheating at the time and after both our kids births she suffered depression. I agreed to the separation of beds and I have zero interest in coercive sex.

So for the next five years we cohabited for the sake of the children. I am not sure if she cheated or not in those years and I really do not care at this point. In 2005 she exhibited many of the so called "cheating wife" traits including always being short and cross with the rest of us. It took about a month to confirm and then I demanded her to stop or else. After being told "you don't own me!" I filed for separation and divorce. Since the marriage as a marriage had been void for years and the children were now 7 and 9 I felt that continuing the farce was only going to further damage the children.

For the next two years I then focused on the children and with a 50/50 custody share I feel I was able to help them through. This year is the the 9th year since divorce. Daughter just turned 17 and is graduating in May. While my ex is NOT my friend and never will be (there will not be any like in our relationship) we did agree this month to share the expense of purchasing a car for my daughter. She is going onto college out of the area (her choice) and I felt she would be better served having one instead of relying on others. Her head is pretty well together coming from our broken home.

I have been in a relationship now for 6 years and once my youngest has graduated High School I am thinking of retiring fully and letting my better half make an honest man out of me. I have seen about half the world it seems like and she has seen a good portion of the half I haven't seen so I figure we both can show each other our favorite old haunts for the next 20 years or so. I'm sure another book could be written then about us. An old broken down retired war dog and her, the liberal college professor and researcher. Definitely going to be the odd couple. But I am looking forward to it.

First let me say that I thought the writing was spot on! The story was good, better than good. Carl's come uppance was sorely missed. You had a nice set up for it, but whiffed by not including it. If calling him out during her group confession was the punishment for him, then it lacked.

I do hope you write more, this was attention grabbing, and it held me. The only disappointment, other than Carl, was the gap between pt2 and 3, but shit happens. Thanks for sharing this with us.

It's called the strength of one's convictions. Deep ones can make for one very strong and tough person.

Not everyone is going to understand what that means. You kinda have to live life that way.

The image this story brings to mind is a movie where a character is fatally wounded and then proceeds to stagger around on the stage in a never ending death scene.

While John's motives are good, I feel it would be almost impossible to be as wounded as he is and as hateful of his wife (although justified) without it leaking out into the relationship with his kids. People are just not that black and white. Troubles at the job leak into your home life. Arguments with a business can color relationships with other people. Emotions don't stay in neat little boxes.

Further, John wallows in all three chapters. He says things that are not true and misleads his wife and the reader. But the anger and sadness just sort of linger. There is no progress. The story ends with him in not much different condition than at the start. Yes, there are a few clever maneuvers, like the Disneyland trip. But all in all, he exists and suffers.

The person that has the most change and perhaps a form of growth is Karen. She starts as a sneaky, arrogant, manipulative bitch. Gradually she is ground down on the rock of misery that John has become. She can't be sneaky because John finds her out and every time she is sneaky she pays a higher price. Her selfishness and arrogance exacts a higher and higher price. She didn't intend to lose her husband but she does. Then she loses her kids. Too late she realizes the damage she has done. She tries to make amends, creatively with the group outing and apology, but what she has shattered is not possible to repair. The relationship she has left is a pale ghost of what she destroyed and she finally realizes there will be no resurrection possible. John mostly passive aggressives her into submission and she becomes as miserable as he is.

I also don't feel there is a resolution to the story. They are now apart but both miserable. What is John going to do when the girls go to college? All the rest of his life seems dead. I get that cheating is destructive but it doesn't have to be lethal.

The writing was very good. The internal dialog was interesting.The overall direction of the story left me disappointed.

Oh, much worse should have happened to his old buddy.

the readers write book length comments, explaining their view of this story. One can't have everything going their way in a story, we all have different views on how we would react. I'm uncomfortable with those that take a strict harsh view on life, white and black only, no shades of gray. Unfortunately life doesn't work that way. I read for entertainment and this story did just that, it entertained, it held my attention. Doesn't matter whether I agree on how it should have ended, that's not my call. The author should write the story the way he sees it, not how we would see it. 5*

I don't usually post anon, because it seems like a weak way, but the following is very personal and hard to share.

When I was 16 my parents divorced. It wasnt a BIG deal, cause they continued to coparent and focus on raising the kids (all six of us!!). But twenty years later, I was surprised to learn my mother had had an affair while I as young that lasted two years an that dad had basically gotten her parents to shut it down and then maintained the family. The marriage was DEAD, and he did admit that he'd never forgiven her for what she did, but the sham version lasted 4 years, an we NEVER knew. Dads explanation was that it was in his history, but he didn't want it to be a part of our. He said they basically had no relationship at all except in front of us.

ALL of those years were happy ones for us. We had NO idea.

This story hit me hard because it is so like my story, andIt upsets me to see people saying my personal history is ridiculus and impossible. This story didn't seem far fetched to me.

Subtle nuances, complex characters, excellent and sometimes brilliant writing. One of the best and most satisfying stories on this site.

Loved the inner dialogue, it worked great.

I even loved how the wife manned up at the end for the good of the others without requiring anything for herself--she learned from a righteous example.

... to wonderful yet melancholic tale. It's quite rare to see a cheated hubby react this way; any written account portraying this methodology has to be carefully written otherwise it would fall flat on its face via implausibility. However TUO has spun a well-crafted tale which is consistent with the tone set throughout the three-parter.

John is a true martyr and whether we can really believe such a man can exist in the real world, we can agree to a reasonable degree he could exist on paper. That he could handle such a devastating tragedy and transform afflictions such as despair, rage, suffering, hatred, and depression into a positive outlet selflessly by focusing on the welfare and upbringing of his children. Essentially, he sacrificed the healing and fulfilment sexual relationship promises because it would always be an illusion which could never mend his wounds.

He may self-destruct because of his decisions but this is reserved for the future because we know he was successful in his objective of raising his daughters with the stability only a loving and caring parent can give.

I felt sorry for Karen, but only because it took her a while for her to realize her idea of reconciliation was not compatible with John's. She was sincere in the end, but the damage was irreparably done when she continued the affair after being confronted about it. Sure, she was told to continue it but she never demonstrated remorse or consideration for her spouse's feelings. She failed to scrutinize the purpose behind his request nor did she show any concern or compassion for him when it would have been plainly obvious to a normal, loving wife. Ultimately, her nonchalant continuation of the affair, despite being aware to his suffering, poisoned her husband and their marriage.

Sometimes it's not about whether he has a bigger dick, or if he is a better lover. No, the issue lies way before that stage. It's about why she felt the need to spread her legs without addressing the reasons or feelings preceding it with her husband.

5* is a given!

Not usually my type of ending (prefer the BTB type) but extremely well written and wonderful character development! Ending was fitting, kind of a Brian's Song type story that you knew couldn't end well. Thanks for not taking the RAAC easy way out.

To me, the first chapter was so-so. in terms of being a setup, it was adequate but only just so. The 2nd installment was sterling, where he recognized the exact width and breadth of her betrayal. From there he established scorched earth policy, unbeknownst to the children.

The cheating wife was beautifully hoisted upon her own petard. The installment also closed magnificently with her realizing the exact magnitude of her folly.

Too bad this the final chapter basically regurgitated the second one. The final piece of the puzzle that would have put this in the Hall of Fame was a ploy equal to his Disneyland sortie that would have dealt with Carl.

Only Roger from ' The Joke ' comes to mind as as being a more infuriating fugitive from loving wives karma then Carl. When an writer creates a great villain, a great comeuppance is called for. That pay back should have been the worthy sequel and finale that would have rocketed this series to Hall of Fame status.

In terms of the big picture, this was a fantastic premiere by the author. There were too many wonderful nuances to count in pt. 2. As for the third, I would close by saying Shakespeare wasn't too ethereal to scuttle his great villians ships and set them alflame for his audiences pleasure, and neither should The Unoriginalist.

But I think you are wrong.

In my opinion, you are a deep and original thinker.

Just because you were inspired by another's work, does not mean that you did not bring your considerable skill and insight to the argument.

All you need to create an entire story from scratch, will be some small observation, or some small thought that will be the foundation of another outstanding work.

Even if you don't write again, my friend, you HAVE contributed, and contributed to a very high degree.

...And I am a "BURN THE BITCH" fan of the highest order. You transcended that, by making your protagonist actually consider, and do, the thing that he thought was most right, given his limited circumstances.

Your character is a better man than I will ever hope to be, because I would have outed her in the most humiliating fashion I could have, crushed my family structure in the process (sadly the kids would have suffered), and probably have gone to jail for a very long time when I got busted for what I did to the shithead.

Thanks, from the heart. Very, very strong writing.

(p.s., I always ignore the odd typo or incorrect syntax, if the bulk of the work is of a high order. People who dwell on those insignificant errors in the light of the entire effort are just stupid.)

As a married man, who has lived in a loveless marriage for the last 24 years, i find it hard to believe that a man would maintain the association with his whore wife as described in this story, even for the sake of his children. Too many ways out. I wont comment on my personal solution.

You took an idea and made us readers feel the pain deeply. Your descriptions of the suffering and despair were excellent. His thoughts and reasons for his actions were very believable. You made Karen human and allowed us readers to forgive her, yet understand why John could not. Readers wanting more revenge of Carl seem to miss the point. John wanted his daughters. That was first and foremost. Revenge is often overrated, and seldom obtained in real life. I really hate to agree with HIV and I almost always agree with Ohio. This story is one of the best in this genre. Well done!

I can't express how remarkable it is to read these comments. Even the detractors bring insight beyond "blah blah cucks." They have valid questions and understandable complaints.

And getting praise from many of my favorite authors? Well, that's been blowing my mind all week.

I'd be the first to admit that there is much more to you than the asshole who rags on everyone else's tales. You're a damn good writer in your own right. This one was bordering on being way too civilized for my taste, but you somehow pulled it off. Seriously, WTF happened to Craptacular Carl the Douchebag?! If the "public" humiliation was the only revenge on him, I'd say that it was a bit on the weak side compared to what you seemingly had planned for him in Chapter 1. Nevertheless...

5 Stars for each chapter.

First, good sustainable writing. Not a fun read, but intriguing. It was reading and, because the writing was compelling, watching, yeah, watching, a man breaking down. He was in the pit of personal hell and that is where I had a problem. The children did sense the doom? Please. Your final curtain was trying so hard to relieve the father of his complicity in wrecking his daughter's adulthood. Still, the rose water that ended it made so many readers happy. So you may not have BedTB, but every one else lived through a personal hell.

He could not forgive ,even after she at toned for her sins. She did all the right things but still the marriage failed. It was her fault but after doing everything right she finally gave up and moved away, why she gave up her kids we will never know her mind set as the author did not leave room for this.

yeah, for all the Airborne Rangers out there (by the way, I AM one, not a wannabee), this is not the way it's supposed to happen. This, people, is how it happens in the real world.

So well written it hurts, and normally I'm a world class critic of Grammar Nazi proportions (ask TxTallTales or StangStar about some of my comments), who genuinely is interested in bettering a writer's craft), I honestly had to read the whole thing three times to detect any errors in writing. I won't mention them here, because it IS that well written it doesn't detract from the story at all. Just saying.

But I still would like to comment a bit on this. I felt the writing was good, but the story was extremely sad. John was definitely the martyr, a Christ-like figure who seemed to embrace punishing himself for his wife's sins. It was bad enough he suffered hurt and anguish resulting from his wife's affair; he then put himself into withdrawal from life itself, losing weight, denying himself happiness at every turn, and maintaining a charade for his daughters' sakes.

At the end, despite his suggestion to the contrary regarding Carl, it seems John was the main loser, and he really came across as a wimp and a whiner, even though he tried to maintain his inner fortitude and carry on. I'm stunned he did not seek counseling; he really needed it. And I feel that children are definitely affected by their environment, even if they don't think they are (one anonymous commenter is a case in point). I've seen this in my career on numerous occasions. Four stars and thanks for writing.

Your writing is just terrific. This is an extremely sad & bitter story about a very sad man who put his kids 1st,2nd & 3rd & everything was nowhere; I don't know if I could have been that strong & stoic to live or treat the cheater like this , Also what did happen to Cal, I wasn't sure if the last 2 - 3 paragraphs pertained to him or not.

No other way to put. The portrayal of the betrayal and the scars left behind were magnificent. Word choice in John's ruminations added imagery and true poignancy. Haven't seen something this deep and well woven since Rhenquist put down his pen. I was glad to see HDK appreciated the tribute too, as his stories are up there with the best.

Bravo. I really hope Sir Thopas can help you present such stellar contributions in the future as well.

Un,

A very well done story. Have to agree with many of the commenters that it was a very sad story. But, also, as many others have said, it's kinda the way things happen in real life; I know, I've been there.

Five stars for sure.

Matt Moreau

Well written, but the guy really is pathetic.

I have never been a fan of wallowing.

I can't remember HIV actually liking a story - that in and of itself is an amazing accomplishment. I was in a similar situation in some ways, but my psycho ex did not even pretend that she loved me. I did get custody of my daughters and was fortunate to eventually upgrade. In this scenario I think shared custody and a spilt would have been better for all parties, but this is an excellent and thought-provoking story.

For some reason I just found this story and read from chapter one. For a first story, or one of many, I thought it was extremely well written. Gut wrenching, like watching a train wreck happen I guess, but it kept my attention completely and it read true to life. If only more parents would put the children first, but then again the toll on one or both parents is significant.

I loved it, the characters, the way they are described, a great writing wich create in the reader (at least for me )powerfull feeling.

Just the last part was, maybe, a bit illogical : to have so strong reactions he must still have some love left for her, and time is really a great master.

I would have though that with her eaing a lot of crows (in public), sincere contrition, a lot of time, and a lot of work they could have been a couple again.

What can I say I'am an hopeless romantic.... But I guess that he was too wounded, she hurt him too much, to heal back to love, a bit sad...

Anyway, it was a fantastic first story, hope to see many others from you !!

just writing sequels from this tale-the wifes POV, an aftermath, heck..even a POV from Carl the "bad guy"

Fine tale, and I enjoyed how you had written your main character as very perceptive after he found out about the wifes affair and calling her out on her "excuses" (haircut, body, etc), so I was puzzled when you let the wife character get away with this statement after she traded in the SUV for a used car .

"...so I had to drop my expectations down a few steps to make it work."

Sounds like a "burn" on hubby-but interactions like that between characters are what made this tale one of the best on LW.

Thanks for posting!