by shayshay77
It's Christmas time, but as he's feeling her up it's now in the warm summer night they kissed in a frenzy of desire and.....
Outside of the summer thing, which didn't appear again so it was merely a slip, it was a good story. Could have used more time to let the act play out and have them really get into it, but I'm pleased.
The sex scenes and descriptions in this story were good, but as others remarked, you've got some continuity problems, which leads me to wonder if you didn't write this story in the summer and then retool it for Christmas.
In the warm summer night they kissed in a frenzy of desire and excitement, hands roaming each other.
Is it xmas or summer ?
The problem of it being winter and the author describing it as a warm summer night(Who'd be having sex outside on a cold night when 2 cars were right there?)took me out of the story- an editor would have caught that.
Well people in Florida at Christmas time its only like 80 degrees so it could have been warm! So I mean cmon now its not cold everywhere!
I loved this so much I read it twice!I'm so wet and slippery now I need an officer of my own.I love cops when their trying so hard to be proffesional and cant.Yummy
Its not winter everywhere during christmas, its 102F here right now and its Nov 27