by gb_jizz
But......I applaud the effort from such an ensemble cast of contributors. 5 stars, Team GB.
The vote was more of an obligation really than a testament.
I found the story tl so dr.
I can think of more "ronic" words to describe this whimsy, but I won't go there. This is a story that tries and tries and tries to be funny. But the irony is: its appropriate audience is much too young to be on Lit to give it a read. I wouldn't dare to vote on it, though. I'm just not the mean-spirited type.
I'm sensing a touch of jealousy and fear from our friends over in the AH. It would appear an intelligent, post-modern story such as this with prose so sublime it positively makes the brain melt is something of a threat to their long held hegemony over the story section of Lit.
Well, guess what, boys? There's a new sheriff in town.
This is perhaps the second worst story ever posted on Lit. The only story I'd rate lower is every story ever penned by Scouries.
0 stars, 0 stars, 0 stars.
Plus I hate Laurel now for allowing it to post.
and AIDS.
I hav red lodes of stories on this cite and this one is the best yet. Please can we hav moor stories about submarines as I want to join the navy soon as soon as i hav got my ged. Awesum story!
Thank you for renewing my faith in mankind. I shall forever be grateful. Please wash the sheets.
This Jizz guy really knows his, um.....well, I'm sure he knows about something. I laughed until I cried. Which embarrassed me so much that I cried some more. And then I laughed. I might need to adjust my meds. Anyhoo, I gave it 5 stars.
Well done! It reads as if that Shakespeare guy wrote it himself.
As I started to read this story, I suddenly found a wet spot on my boxers. Turns out it wasn't pre-cum but instead I had spilled my trademarked coca cola can ashtray on myself. No matter though, the smell of nicotine on my dick got me harder as I read the story. Well that was until I got to the part about blondes. They say redheads have no souls, but it was a myth spread by the nazis because, well you know that whole blonde blue eyed Aryan thing. But I digest, er digress (sorry, I'm eating my toenail clippings right now). As I came upon the word midget, I felt my ball sack swollen with anticipation. I knew this was going to be a redheaded midget, with those cute freckles and drapes with matching carpets. As I made a large gulping sound from my anticipation, I find out the midget is bald. It was then I used my secret contacts at Literotica and found out this story was concocted by members of Stormfront.
........shit, I don't know what it was. Thanks though, Jizz. tom anon
It's so rare that such a tale could sweep me up in its haunting text, touching places inside me that are never seen. I laughed, I cried, I winced. What more can you ask for?
Clean, taut writing, no doubt. The storyline is tired, though. No amount of style can overcome cliche.
I encourage the writer to draw more from life experience and to rely less on stock imagery.
Stunning. An erotic tour de force. I just wish I could give it more than five stars. It recalls the eroticism of Anais Nin combined with the effortless prose of Marcel Proust.