As It Seems Ch. 08

"Gauge-"

"We have our own problems to deal with." His was voice was calm and low but she heard the edge and anger and hurt in that low calm. He wasn't going to let her run from him, he was going to make her admit what she tried to keep secret.

She almost tripped trying to keep up with his long stride. She should just turn around and walk away, she would if she didn't think he would catch her, if she followed him she at least had time to think to prepare and build a wall his slate eyes couldn't penetrate or his smooth voice couldn't crumble.

He had a death grip on her hand like he knew she was thinking about fleeing. Who was she kidding, he did know. That's what she did. She ran from him, she was always running from him.

He trapped her between his car again. His steel colored eyes searching through her.

"Please not here." She whispered peering around him expecting an audience any moment. He cupped her face his jaw set as he studied her hard, his jaw twitched as he leaned his head against hers. He sighed before pulling back, opening the door for her. She watched him climb in, comparing his impossibly long limbs to her short. She could see him willing himself to be level and it hurt her, that she couldn't just throw away her doubts and fears. She couldn't just dive into his arms no matter how much they both needed each other.

She reached out timidly taking his, "don't hate me," her voice a soft plea.

He should be furious with her, she left in the middle of the night, she avoided him all weekend. Hewasfurious Goddamnit! He wanted shake some sense into her. He wanted to press her body against his car and push into her until she admitted that they belonged together. And now she was looking up at him with those soulful doe eyes watery with tears. Her nose flaring, her cheeks flushing and her lip quivering slightly. He never wanted to see her cry but she was beautiful even then.

"Bella," her name was an exasperated sigh, "how could you ever think that? Nothing will ever make me hate you...nothing, don't you understand that?" he pulled her close letting her hide her face in his shoulder. He didn't want to have this conversation in his car in David's drive way. Wanted to cradle her in his arms, he wanted to lay her back; he just wanted a chance to prove they were right for each other. She pulled away turning away form him. He resigned that was all he was going to get from her now, at least he got something. He pulled out of the drive.

It took no time to get to his apartment. She wished she had a little more time to gather herself, her thoughts. How could she turn down what he so desperately wanted to offer her? What she so desperately wanted to take. What choice did she have but to say no? Her Dad came with the territory and it wouldn't be fair to Gauge or anyone to take on that burden. She leaned on Gauge too much already. No matter how many times he apologized or said she could depend on him that one night punished her memory. She couldn't just forget. It wasn't that she blamed him, she really didn't. It was more that she realized she was on her own, and she would always be. Just like her bank out accounts she over drew on his friendship...

He watched the wheels in her mind turning as she tried not to look at him. At least she wasn't running anymore, at least he had a chance to explain and try and make amends. He sighed so loud with such frustration she turned to look at him, curiously. He could see her trying to figure if he was frustrated with her. He couldn't keep the harshness from his voice, "are you going to talk to me today?" he watched her flinch and bit his lip as he pulled back. "I'm sorry, I just...I just don't know what to say to you anymore." He gripped the steering wheel. Anger flushed his cheeks as he stared at his white knuckles; he hopped out of the car slamming the door behind him. The cold air shocked him as he opened the door for her. She followed him to his apartment, her head hung low, but grateful not be having this conversation in the car. Once inside he trapped her between the door and his arms. "I fucked up. I turned my back on you, and I'm so goddamned ashamed of myself." He said finally his voice trembling,"you deserve so much better...and you don't even fucking know it." He turned to look at her. His eyes were rimmed red with the flood of emotions making the grey appear even more shocking. Janabelle wanted to look away, but he was so close, he was so beautiful. Gauge cupped her face; he watched her full lips tremble. "Why won't you let me-"his voice a broken whisper?

"I'm not good enough for you!" she shouted, the power and venom in her voice shocked him. He understood, finally he understood what she was afraid of. "My mom is probably a crack whore somewhere at best she's fucking dead, and my dad! My fucking father- he- he's just worthless and it's never been any different!"

"Baby, what does that have to do with you?" his voice a gentle command.

"That's what I am Gauge. That's what I came from!" Why didn't he get it. She wasn't any good because her parents were no good, there was no hope that she could be anything but a burden.

"Is that what you think?" he laughed a heartbreaking sound. "Oh my god honey, don't you see you're the best part of them...you're the best part of me..." his lips brushed hers, tasting her sweetness, "be apart of me, Bella...love Me." she followed his lips as they traced hers. His warm breath teasing her. He pulled her close. She tasted him, savored the softness of his lips. She could have this, she could have him. She could forget what she came from and be something loved and cared for. His hands traveled from her face to her neck down her back, making the heat rise from her chest.

He needed to touch her, he needed to feel her warm soft skin, he needed to know she was real and she wasn't going to blow in a puff of dreams when he opened his eyes.

His hands went under her shirt. Her moans were honey and music, calling out to him, begging him, daring him to take it further. His fingers traced the curve of her back moving around to cup her small firm breasts, hiding under a cotton bra.

"Gauge..." her voice was soft against his mouth her hands cupping his face. His weekend stubble course on her tender fingers making her shiver, she knew he'd be relentless on her body. He'd try and prove to her that they belonged, that he wasn't going anywhere, he'd leave his mark on her...and leave her devastated and hurt. If Gauge let her down she'd never recover, she had to stop this.

Gauge felt her tense, he felt her thoughts. He held her closer, tighter. His mouth more insistent, if she wouldn't listen to her heart he'd make her listens to her body. He pulled her shirt over her head, admiring her smooth rich brown skin. He gazed up at her as he nudged her bra cup down taking a hard ripe nipple into his mouth.

Janabelle's eyes were heavy; her vision blurred seeing a fuzzy halo around him. His eyes usually intense were now brimming with barely controlled emotions, she didn't want to try and sort them out, she didn't want to think of her feelings. He could see her thoughts moving away from him so he bit her nipple.

"This is all that matters," he whispered against her now throbbing nipple, gently blowing over the pulsing tender skin.

"Gauge!" she gasped as he attacked the other nipple, she rocked forward against his jeans, her panties heavy and were causing bitter sweet friction. She felt his ache hard against her, trying to escape his jeans. She knew he was above average but from what she could feel he was way above the curve. Bella's skin prickled and she shivered she wanted to weep with the longing overwhelming her, punishing her for denying her own needs over what before seemed like common sense but now was so absurd and petty she couldn't bring herself to remember her protests. All she could think about was Gauge and his roaming lips, whispering to her encouraging her. "Gauge, Gauge!" she gasped again as his finger found its way to her swollen clit, rubbing small circles his tongue flicked her nipple flashing in her mind what it would look like to have him licking between her thighs, setting her body off in a fit of convulsions. Her back arched, her eyes rolled back she bit her lip to holding on to the scream looking for a way out. She was so ready to give in, to loose her fear, to give Gauge a piece of her no one has ever had.

Gauge glared up at her a lascivious smile cracking his lips. She was mistaken if she thought she'd get off that easy. He kissed down her belly flicking his tongue in the little indentation.

"Are you going to stop fighting and let me in?" he asked above the waist of her black jeans skirt. She nodded she'd say anything if he'd just keep going. He wanted her to say it; he needed her to say that she wouldn't run, that she forgave him, and that she was his. "Say it." His fingers twirled her throbbing tenderness.

"I-I wont run anymore." She whimpered pulling at his arm clawing him. They were so devoured in each other they almost didn't hear the rapid knocking on the door. They stilled gazing at each other through hazy eyes. They were going to ignore it, nothing was going to stop Gauge from finally having her, but the knock sounded again this time urgent and angry.

"Bella..."

"No gauge please- I-"she knew if they were not together now she wouldn't have the courage later. The door pounded again. Who ever was on the other side was willing to break it down if he didn't see what their damage was.

Gauge swung the door open his eyes burning with impatience. A swear died on his lips as he met eyes with a police officer who looked just as agitated.

"Can I help you officer," he said barely able to keep the edge from his voice

"Gauge Somners?" Gauge stepped back a little

"Yeah?"

"We are looking for Janabelle Brooks."

"I'm Janabelle," she stood up straightening her clothes. The cop looked Janabelle up and down then turned his hostile gaze to Gauge.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Gauge demanded as the cop grabbed him pulling his hands behind his back hooking metal bracelets around his wrist to restrain him.

"Gauge Somners you're under arrest, you have-"the cop started reading his Miranda rights when Bella stepped up.

"What's-why-"

"You Janabelle Brooks?" another cop stepped forward.

"Yes," she frowned the confusion on her face would have been comical if Gauge wasn't being wrestled to the ground and arrested.

"Your father put out a missing persons when you didn't go home Friday, he said you would be here." The cop said, he was a big intimidating country looking man, with cold guarded eyes, that seemed to search for the worst in people, and a plump red face. Bella stepped back slightly cowed by the imposing figure.

"But what does that have to do with Gauge?"

"Aiding and abetting a runaway and lude conduct with a minor."

"But who-you don't mean me?" she and Gauge stared at each other in confusion. Gauge wanted to laugh, these fuckers were serious. They thought Bella was underage and they thought he was about to-he shivered in disgust at the thought. But Janabelle did look absurdly young with her pig tails and pony tails, her japanime t-shirts and her petite figure, those dark doe eyes and sweet face. The way she gazed up at everyone not to mention her soft pitched voice. "But I'm 23; way passed the age of having a curfew, you know I can even drink."

The cop in front of her folded his arms smirking, "Got any proof, little girl?" he taunted. He didn't believe her. Why would he? He came across kids lying about their age all the time.

"No, I-"

"Let me guess, you left it in your algebra book? Your dog ate it?" color stained her cheeks and she bit her lip to keep from saying anything, now was not the time to use her smart mouth. She would take Gauge's lead and let everything take care of itself.

"I left it at home. If I could just-"

"Well lucky you we were taking you that direction anyway and your friend can wait it out in the tank."

---

David search hard for the woman he fell in love with, but she wasn't there, maybe she never existed to begin with, maybe it wasn't love. He could have been infatuated with her cornflower blue eyes, burning bright with mischief. Now he knew it wasn't mischief it was a malicious hateful burning. The desire he saw in her eyes wasn't passion. It was the desire to hurt, to destroy any thing in her path. He didn't want to believe it. Especially not after so much time, after eight years of marriage and two kids. Why did it take him so long to realize what she was? His profession was digging deep to find the truth and he couldn't even find it in his own home.

He closed his eyes and looked away, he had seen it but by then it was too late, they had already had Daniel and he didn't want to think that way about the mother of his child. He had to see the good in her, if there was any. He used to convince himself she did, but now he wasn't so sure. Now he just wanted her gone, he didn't want this cold calculating bitter woman in his or his children's lives. He didn't want to think about his children being apart of someone so coniving.

"Where were you?" he asked his hands clenching and unclenching as he stared ahead seeing nothing. He couldn't keep the bark from his voice. Did he really care where she was, what she was doing or even who she was doing it with?

He heard Jenny lick her lips nervously, as they both realized simultaneously that he didn't care anymore. He could hear the lie forming on her lips, before she said it, before she could even think of one.

"Please don't lie to me," he said softly. He should have been angry; he should have wanted to wrap his hands around her throat and shaken the truth from her. But what he felt was a cooling curiosity. She was a case he wanted solve, nothing more.

He was angry but not because she'd been gone for days with out a word, but because she brought Alexa in their troubles again. They both knew Alexa would do anything if for her family and that made it easy for jenny to manipulate her. It made him more than angry that she constantly took advantage of Alexa's almost desperate need to be needed in the family.

"I-"he heard the nerves in her voice as she gagged on the beginning of her lie, his cool green eyes cut into her. She couldn't read him. She couldn't say anything; there was nothing to say when he looked at her like that.

Jenny stared at the floor, fighting the urge to gnaw her lip or bite her cuticles, like she'd seen Alexa do so many times. She wasn't going to let that sort of weakness show unless it could be used to her advantage.

Why was everyone coming down on her anyway, Alexa was an even bigger manipulator than she was. She made people believe she was this tuff take no shit woman, but anyone could see that she wasn't, she was timid and hurt. She made people believe that she was this loving nurturing woman but she wasn't she was cold and frigid. Jenny couldn't tell you why she hated her, she couldn't tell you why she acted out the way she did. She didn't see anything wrong with her behavior; she didn't understand why she didn't get as many chances as Alexa. She didn't understand why Alexa was offered so much unconditional love and she was scrambling to keep her family together.

"I went out," she shrugged fighting the urge to clear her throat, fighting any indication that she was scared or worried. She took a long swallow of the bitter liquid, forcing it down her throat as fear tightened it. She knew she went too far. She shivered thinking about what would happen if the Hadrian's found out her involvement in Alexa's accident. She counted on the fact that Alexa wouldn't want to start trouble in the family or cause anymore tension than what was already there. Jenny wasn't even sure if Joseph or Elizabeth Hadrian knew about Alexa's accident, she was pretty sure that David was helping her hide it.

David nodded slowly, his eyes a dull green, as impassive as glass. She didn't like that he wasn't yelling, that he was barely talking.

"You told Alexa you were with me. You told her we were working things out. You knew-"he paused slowly chewing his words, tasting them almost gagging on his disgust, "you knew she'd do anything to help us. You knew and you didn't care how hard it would be for her to watch Daniel and Clara."

"What's the big deal? What does it matter I got Nathan-"she flinched backing away realizing too late she said the wrong thing.

"You got Nathan!" he edged closer, "you got Nathan who has barely been involved with this family, not that I can fucking blame him!-you got Nathan who is in one dangerous situation after another!"

"So my brother isn't good enough for your family!" Jenny shouted excitement heating her face. She tried to hide it but David caught the flash brightening her eyes. It hit him, he finally understood. Jenny enjoyed this. She enjoyed hurting people; she enjoyed seeing how far they would let her go.

He laughed bitterly, "yeah that's right sweetheart, make this about me and my family, let's forget that you've been gone god knows how long...for what? Another man? Another woman?" He edged closer, she flinched when he reached out to touch her hair and stroke her cheek. He studied her calculating blue eyes, watching as anything beautiful he saw in her faded.

"No-I-"she stammered, trying to figure out how to turn this around. "I just wanted to get away! Are you happy! I just wanted sometime to myself not being someone's wife or mother! I wanted time to be-"

"Fuck you!" he scoffed. "You don't think I know what's going on? You're fucking playing with me and my family, and it stops here! Today I don't really care where you were-what you were doing or who you were doing it with-"his hand gripped tight in her soft brown hair. "You forget what I do, if I wanted to know I could find out." Her heart pounded as his nose brushed hers, his voice was low and husky making her panties drop with moisture, "What I do care about is that you stop hurting my family, so you are going to pack your shit and get the fuck out of my house." He growled his grip tightened jerking her head almost painfully. He let her go so suddenly she stumbled.

"What?" she blinked surprised and hurt.

"Get out." he said simply, evenly taking the beer bottle from her taking a long drink and handing it back to her, before walking away.

"Wait David-no-"he kept walking; he didn't even pause to listen to her. He locked himself in his office. He listened with cold disinterest as she pounded and sobbed against the door, before she gave up and started packing.

His shoulders slumped and he rested his hands in his palms, hoping he did the right thing.

Connor's body ached and shook with fatigue as he made his way to what had to be the he most uncomfortable couch in creation. It was lumpy with springs and stuffing poking out of its worn interior. He wasn't going to be picky; he'd sleep on a rock if he could lay on it. His muscles vibrated and hummed in a spasm beneath his skin. His nose twitched as coffee brewed it smelled strong and bitter but it was probably what he needed to clear his thoughts.

He should be thinking about Melendez, how far he's come and how much further he needed to get what he wanted. But he wasn't, he wasn't even thinking of the bruises quickly developing all over his body. He grunted rolling on the couch; he closed his eyes, fighting the image of fiery hazel eyes gazing up at him in mixture of challenge and willingness. He saw her full lips open and her head fall back as she panted calling for him, begging for him.

"Fuck," he growled.

"What the hell is the matter with you?" Connor opened one eye, his fuzzy blue gaze settling on Kenta. A tall dark haired dark eyed black woman. Even in the trashed state she was in now; her hair matted and dirty, her face bruised and lips dry and split she could turn heads. It had t be her dark mysterious eyes promising to fulfill every want and need. She wasn't particularly pretty in the classical sense, more exotic. Her angular face and high cheek bones her lips full and lush. He was sure her body mimicked his in gunshot and stab wounds, which made her even more perfect for him. "Why are you staring at me?"