tagNon-EroticAsshole!

Asshole!

byfisherman©

“Asshole!”

“What put you in such a foul mood anyways?”

“Look at that asshole! Driving with that damn cell phone stuck in his ear. Going slow and weaving from lane to lane.

“What you bitching about? I’m the one who’s driving, not you.”

“Why Shouldn’t I? It’s eight thirty, this snow sucks, there’s nothing but assholes on the road and I’m late again. This will be the sixth time. I’m gonna get in trouble.”

You’re not that late. Besides I got pull. I’ll cover for you.”

“Yeah you got pull, just like you had pull this morning. “What’s with you? Thought you enjoyed it, now your acting like you got out on the wrong side of the bed.”

“This morning was different. The snow on my bedroom window and me in my warm bed. You waking me up the way you did. Now I’m tired, sore and cold. I need a cup of coffee.”

“Get one when you get there. Cheer up, we’re doing the speed limit. It’s a beautiful morning. The sun and the snow all stuck to the tree branches. Looks like cotton candy. You should learn to appreciate mornings like this. And....”

“And you blew your load. You’re always happy after. Me? I’m still leaking what you left inside me. I didn’t even have enough time to shower or clean up. You’re not the one who’s sore. Sometimes you’re too rough, doing the things you do.”

“You didn’t complain this morning.”

“That was earlier, I got carried away, especially when you did that thing.”

“How about tomorrow morning? Want to get carried away then?”

“That all you think about? Shit, I need a break. Besides she might find out if we keep it up like this.”

“You’re beginning to sound like a whore using that foul talk. Even she’s starting to complain.”

“She’ll complain about a lot more than my language if she finds out.”

“She won’t. When I left this morning she was snoring away. Dead to the world with the covers over her head. All I could see was her gray hair sticking out. Looked like a overweight cat crawled into bed.”

“Never seen what you saw in her. How’d you two hook up anyways? Gives me the shivers you doing what we do with her.”

“You didn’t know her back then. She was different, a lot like you, full of piss and shit. Loud, brash, full of life. Remember one time she danced naked in the park with everyone watching just because it was the first warm day of spring. That was the winter we got tons of snow. But then, over the years that all changed. Just somehow slipped away, slow like. I never noticed, I should of, but I didn’t. Now, all she cares about is if dinner’s hot and on time. Or the house is clean. She’s not there anymore. Like some how it all died.”

“Why you so frustrated, especially after this morning? Thought you got all that frustration out’your system.”

“Frustration? You wanna talk about frustration? Let me tell you about it. I have that feeling everyday from my family. I’ve got more demands on my life than when it was just me. Besides mornings with you, there’s no time in my day that I consider mine. I get so mad when I think of time and energy I spend on all of them. I try hard to bend over backwards but it never works and I feel guilty for upsetting the applecart. Wish she get with the program. She’s so self centered, lost in her own family’s world with that damn store they run. Wish she get a grip and realize the world doesn’t revolve around her family and all their goings on. All of them demanding immediate gratification from me, like it’s my duty.”

“Maybe a change do you both good. Go on a trip or cruise or something.”

“Tried that, she wouldn’t go, wouldn’t even consider it. Says it’s the money, can’t afford it, but we can. Says she has to stick around because of her sick aunt may die in that nursing home. She couldn’t stand her when she was healthy now she’s waiting till she dies, hoping she’ll get a piece of money. Then she says she’s got to plan the family reunion. Like all that’s more important. Those fools, all they want something for free. Think she cares more about them things. Thank God I got you. Wouldn’t know what I do if it weren’t for you.”

“Jerk off. That’s what you do if I wasn’t around.”

“See, you’re like she was. Back then she’d say something like that, when we first meet. Back then we did more things than you can think of.”

“I wondered where you dreamed up all that crazy shit we do in the morning. Always though you lay awake all night thinking it up. You did them things with her? She let you?”

“She’s the one who taught me. Now I’m teaching you.”

“Christ, never guessed that.

“We’re here. I called ahead and told them you be late because of the snow. Get yourself a cup of coffee and catch your breath before you start your day. I’ll pick you up after. One thing before you go, call it wisdom from an aged man. Remember, in each and every way we’re all assholes.”

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by Anonymous

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by betrayedbylove09/24/13

One More Line Added To This Tale

But I am the biggest asshole there ever was.
Enough said.

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