All Comments on 'Bonnie with Biceps'

by NiceGuyInVa

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  • 4 Comments
PORNSTARXXX469PORNSTARXXX469over 2 years ago

VERY SEXY, I LIKED IT, BUT IT WAS TOO BRIEF A STORY

AnonymousAnonymousover 4 years ago
not even plausable

Fiction has to make sense. This didn't.

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
Not as bad as that. . .

But it could have been a lot better. I think you rushed it. Even muscular women like to take their time before grabbing onto their prey. It would have worked better to have him going a couple of times to the gym and getting more intidated as time went on. Then have her come over to help and get aquainted. Just a thought. Don't rush your stories so much--take time to build the tension and characters.

JimDinMN

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
Are you for real?

Pathetic. Give it up.

Anonymous
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