All Comments on 'Breaking Adam'

This was AWESOOOOOOOOOOOOOOME! I LOVE this series! All the characters are fantastic and so is your writing!! I hope to see more and more and more from you!!! Thank you so much for this one! x

Looooooooovvvved it!! I'm looking forward to the next one!!

excellent story, glad to see more of your stuff!

OMG..Another great story..Cant wait for the next one

you are so very talented. I love all of your stories, cant wait for the next one. x

you use 'then' when you should use 'than' to show a comparison.

-Sam

You are a terrific writer and I would love to read more of your stories. One thing: you mixed up "your" (showing possession) and "you're" (you are) constantly through out this story. It is a minor thing but distracting when reading. Please keep writing!! How about Jessica's story next?

Jessica's story is being typed as we speak. I'm starting a series too the first chapter of which should be up soon and I also might continue Alex and Mike :) Ty for the great comments!!!!

this is a great story...i just wish it had been longer...hopefully there could be a part 2? it doesnt feel quite finished

Oh my God! That was amazing! Great story!

Can you PLEASE write more about Jonny & Luke in the Going Home series? I want to know what happens.

Wow, you're a great story-teller. I have to say I'm addicted. I love that the 3 stories I've read so far have links, it makes it more fun to read as we can keep the characters we love. More please!

Ok I did not get this story at all and I read ur other stories and I think they are brillient especially the going home series but this one is just confusing between the dad and the emotional problems he has I totally got confused it was just too much with not enough information on those bits. I still think ur an amazing writer though

This is a good story, but like another person said, it doesn't seem finished. Can you please make a chapter 2?

You have a great imagination, and a gift for storytelling, BUT, you desperately need an editor. Your spelling and grammer need work.You need to slow down and proofread before you submit your work.

Please don't ever stop writing, as you are really good.

Hope to read more from you soon

Good Luck!!

You really do need an editor. Someone already pointed out some mistakes you made with grammar, you also used were when you meant we're (contraction of "we" and "are"). This story could be so much better with proofreading done.

Also I mentioned this with Brad, but since you brought the character back I'm gonna say it again. The roommate of Brad's was suppose to be leaving, yet by my calculation, its been months since he was going home to help out with the family. If you put that kind of detail in to a story make sure you follow through, or dedicated readers become upset.

OH and almost for got, your usage of 'to' was wrong in many instances. 'Too' should have been used, think of it like a substitute for 'also' when writing. Keep up the good work.

It was a great story. Maybe a series?

This is even better than Brad's and Alex's stories... It's funnier too, especially the things between Alex and Mike...

I really enjoyed the stories about all the gang, but they all seem to end too soon! Please think about doing some epilogues or even more chapters to add on as it would be fun to see what happens after the initial happy ending ;)

and I think Adam taking Evan back so easily was a bit unrealistic, otherwise it was a perfect story and I loved it!!!! I cried for Adam when Evan said He wasn't worth the time it would take to get through his wall!!! I would also just like to point out that not everyone picks on or ignores their crushes. Some of us actually flirt instead!!

Great story all around, just keep and eye on grammer and punctuation!

These stories are like Twinkies - sweet, gooey, and in in no way nutritional. I think Winning Alex is still my favorite of the series, but I love Adam and Evan when they are playing well together. And the scene where Alex is taking care of Adam!! *swoon* I want a cute gay boy to stroke his fingers through my hair!

i really like your story and i was shocked when adam topped evan but that also kinda disappointed me.....

ok i know I'm not the only person out there thinking it - Evan is a complete dick! and the slut thing? come on why would anyone believe that someone acts like a trampy whore because they like you. I'm glad Adam called him on it, but i think he forgave him too quickly. other than that, great story.

Well written but the relationship with Evan wasn't really explored....felt like I was reading about Adam n Victor with Evan as a side....... your other stories are much better....

. . . its like this: ''yea'' is what you say when your team scores a run, a goal, et cetera, instead of ''yippee.'' "'Yeah'' is what people say when they mean ''yes.'' In Denmark they may often say ''yeah yeah'' when they are enthusiastic. (In America "yeah, yeah'' is universally said in derision or disrespect.) DOUG out

I loved all three additions to this college bromance. I cried like a baby during the last two. And then came like a horse for all three. Wonderfully written and great story lines.

Adam taking Evan back pissed me off. The girl inside of me wanted Evan, James, and Victor to suffer for what they did. But then I realized that these are men. And men tend not to hold grudges. Yes, there are exceptions to every rule but then I also realized that this was a story and I needed to get over it. Haha. Good story. I didn't really like Evan though, he was a huge dick.

Story moves too fast. Slow things down, make it more real.

Also, learn how to use apostrophes. (Please!)

What a great story! Thank you!

Adam should've told Evan to hop back into his douche canoe and paddle the fuck away