by mzzqt
For me there wasn't enough build up in the action. I'm home. I watching. I'm cumming. I'd like a little more erotic story before getting into the sexy scene.
You really made me hot just watching you openning your hot pussy up for your huge cocked Dad. Sure hope you get it in the end. Your asshole will likely get stretched open too with that whopper of a cock shooting load after load in your cunt and ass. Can't wait to read the rest of your incest relationship with your monster cocked Dad.
Loved this story. I've been teasing my dad Rick for years but still he hasn't given in. Loved the shower scene, and hope you hit me up. I'm stacy18_bi at hotmail
i cum thinking of my sexy 22 year old daughter almost every day sometimes 3 or 4 times a day
Left me hot and frustrated... for more. Can't wait for what's next, that was so sexy :)
i got home from school with my sister and we saw daddy in the shower, my sister and i looked at each other and knew without saying a word what we wanted, we stripped and walked into the bathroom, daddy nearly had a heart attack when we stepped intot he shower with him,we showed him how much we loved him and had our pussy full of his cock and loved every second of it. so go for it, daddy's cock is best
I loved this story, can't wait to read the rest. Never have commented, but yours just sounded so DELICIOUS!!!!
mmmmmmm loved ur story I can wait for the next part where she plans to have daddy's cock. Really had my dick hard and cumming
I loved it! This sets things up nicely for the story to continue. I'd love to read about the father nailing his daughter in the shower, her sucking his cock until he would cum in her mouth, and maybe a MMF scene between her father, herself, and possibly an Uncle?
I loved it and am excited--in more ways than one--to read the next chapter!
I appreciate the feedback, as this is only my second story submitted. I will keep in mind, for future reference, the four S's, and the length! (and also for the angry man..who hates "to be continued".. to make each part stand alone OR as a group!
Thanx again!
Mzzqt
(I voted zero on this, to keep the ratings real...and because it wouldn't allow me to NOT vote lol)
While a little weak on character development, this one definitely has some possibilities for a good, erotic series. I did, however, feel that it ran a little short- almost done before it began, really. Some things to consider when setting a scene: scents, surroundings, sensations and sounds- the Four S's. Put everything into context. Other than that, keep up the good work and have fun!
I want to be your Daddy!
You can watch me any time.... of course, Daddy wants to watch you too..... perhaps I have.
That was the hottest story yet! So far you are 2 for 2 in making my big cock spurt...keep it up! [wink!wink!] Sure wish MY daughter would catch ME...but she's not that observant...sadly.
JR
This is an excellent story. Despite its short length the story is not "cramped". It doesn't sound rushed. It does, however, make the reader wish for more.