by lorana
I would have prefered this chapter to be a bit longer ,with a few more story details to capture my full interest ,but it's too short to form an opinion,yet.But I'm looking forward for more.
Thanks.
It would have been better to take your time and flesh it out more. One needs to connect with the characters to be dragged into the story further. That being said, your story has great potential but I think you should pull this and work on it some more. The creative process shouldn't be rushed so don't worry about people cracking the whip, the readers will still be here waiting. Good luck.
This was very rushed. As an author these stories are your babies, don't let them grow too fast and don't be overwhelmed by people wanting more. I guarantee that your readers won't mind waiting a while for a longer story. Sex isn't everything either. I'm sorry but if characters are doing do the deed every four paragraphs then I don't want to read it. That having been said, this was wonderful. So much potential. I would love to read more. Please keep of the good work!