All Comments on 'Collateral Damage'

Great story! Another cheating wife is incinerated.

What bomb? He was a simple cuck that let his slut fuck him over and over. The only "bomb" was the fart he passed through his enlarged asshole.

I liked it, as it was different. I too agree that a view from the ex-wife might an interesting take.

It would be interesting to hear what she thinks. The woman’s perspective

A very clever twist on the LW genre. And a very sad tale. Well written and paced. 5 stars. DMW aka Sumnut96

“ He knew she was the victim as much as she was the participant”

Bullshit! Just another author making excuses for women, and denying their agency, and accountability. It’s still adultery even if the affair partner is the same sex.

Also, a married woman isn’t supposed to be submissive to anyone but her husband. A true submissive is loyal to her chosen Master. Submission doesn’t mean obedience to everyone. Trying to excuse her choices because she was submissive to her sister in law was ridiculous!

ZK

"Hey wifey, let's do the same goddamn thing for the 50,000 time and call it fun!"

If the guy is that clueless about role-playing, no wonder the women had to find some release!

Also, those two doofuses could've got in on something good; it was set up for them.

This is a good lesson about believing the bullshit that people are coerced into expecting out of life. None of this would have come to pass if the MC hadn't been taught to expect monogamy. Monogamy is an unnatural state for humans and to expect it is to set yourself up for disasters such as this. This is simply born out in the divorce statistics.

We need to teach our children not to expect or accept it if they are to avoid heartbreak.

KMN!

well written different twist to the cheating spouse. unrelated, just sell the company to the employees and move to Tahitia..

Other than the pity party at the end it wasn't bad.. Too many commenters think it should be less hurtful because its a woman, but betrayal is betrayal. Had they not snuck around their hubbys backs, things might've been different. There were no 3somes offered so stop dreaming.

Bof, très déçu.

Damn and double damn! All of the "btb" noise and here I am, with a perverted reaction - There's fun going down Babe, can I watch?

Stupid asshole MC divorces not for infidelity but irreconcilable differences!!

He had no balls to tell his kids and family about why he was divorcing her!!

Usual trash MC by thus cuck writer

Meh. Pretty dry emotional fare. No understanding of why. No clue why he left his own house. No rationale for why he didn't disclose details to his kids, parents or in-laws. Both ex-couplez seem misrable but that is the consequences of cheating and discovery without confession. What did Caroline think woukd happen?

Disagree with the person who said the husbands have low self-esteem for divorcing the cheaters. Your married your cheating it doesn’t matter wither male or female.

The cuck Mark should have told his children and their parents about Caroline and Karen instead of shielding the one!! The 2 bitches deserved to be burned.

Heu, d'une tristesse insoutenable. L'auteur a déjà fait beaucoup mieux.

What a dismal man! Looks like he swallowed his own grenade. I have no sympathy for him.

Your definition of a bomb is more like a firecracker . This was a very mild divorce, with no punishment, only the consequences she brought upon herself by her own actions.

Why would he leave the house, even temporarily?!? Also, no, the wives did NOT love their husbands. Adultery is evidence that the cheater doesn’t love their spouse.

Basically, he was too nice, and he long since should have had frank conversations with his children.

ZK

With regards to two comments below.

The foundational basis of live and marriage is UNCONDITIONAL FAITH AND TRUST.

As such HER reasons are of no value or regard. Hers was not a matter discussed and agreed upon by her husband. It was conscious, premeditated self-centered deceit. THERE IS NO WAY to come back from that unless he is willing to be cuck.

To the person who dissed the MC because he is unwilling to accept his wife's SM lesbian drive....go push your destructive WOKE agenda elsewhere.

The MC, and his son, should have gotten grief counseling to allow them resume normal lives. Carolines contribution to their emotional waste land is a further reason she deserves a place in hell.

Very well done.

Very different from Captains Choice thus a diversified talent.

This story should have been much more interesting but it was told like someone reading names from a phone book

An average story at best. AAA++

Well, the story began quickly enough and progressed fairly well. Then, the brother hands his balls to Karen. After a short time she dumps his ass and moves on... Probably as she planned all along. Caroline, she has no problem cashing those support checks and is just riding out the issue of being outed as a cheating whore. She figures it will blow over eventually. The MC just plods along willingly taking it up the ass (figuratively) . What a maroon ! He is the only one that seems to have paid a price for the affair. 3 stars, because there was no real end .

so his wife is bi - big deal ! just being physical it could be tolerated.

What bugs me about the story is that it doesn't address the why. From the perspective of the husband, that is the first thing you ask yourself. Why? What did I do, or not do? Do I not show you my love, do you hate the way I fuck you, do I not satisfy you? Were you drugged or blackmailed, or knocked in the head? I can understand in the heat of the moment as a matter of pride declaring "I don't want to know", but human nature being what it is, we want to know deep inside. Also from the reader perspective, we have the plot elements in common for most of these type of stories. Spouse cheats, other spouse finds out and reacts a certain way. Beyond the reaction, what differentiates the stories is the why. My two cents.

Dude. Doing another woman, his sister-in-law! That's...............hot. Wife told him it was better with him, but noooo, he had to kick her out MC is just a wuss with a stick up his ass! And, as he stated, "the architect of my own misfortune."

Re: nixrox

You gave this story 1* because you don't care for BDSM or pain in relationships and I'm with you on that. You also have a problem with same sex relationships, ok, I don't really care myself. I feel the same way about religion and politics as long as someone doesn't try to force it on me. I do find it interesting that according to your favorites you are into incest. Signed: BTW

I started to like this story, but then he took it the same route as all the other authors have done. The timeline didn't leave room for much. In this. Well can't call it a story since so much was taken from other ideas, Anyway he gets the report, calls and meets with his brother, they drive to his house where they catch his wife and sister in law engaged in sexual dynamics, And not any sexual act, but one she had always denied him. Okay? Now. He confronts his wife and tells her how everything is going to go down. But Wait!! he has everything rolling by then, his attorney is in the process of filing, his bank is already making arrangements to keep his wife from touching anything. He already has a story to tell his kids and everyone they know. All in one day? Really? So what is he going to tell his friends and kids? That he wasn't man enough to satisfy her that she had to look for someone else to do it for her? And not just anyone else, but a woman with an artificial. Lol. That's where I had an issue with this story. everything was handled in one sitting.

A well written story with a lot of thought into the aftermath of the affair.

As a non American, I cannot believe your legal system of no fault. Why would anyone get married with such a stupid law which seems to benefit the cheater.

3* - Too sad to enjoy

1 star -

As far as I am concerned, BDSM or pain in any form, is totally unacceptable in any kind of relationship between two or more people. I also do not like to see anything involving same gender sexual activity. So I guess I will from this point forward, spend more time researching the type of stories this and other authors submit - especially reading the comments section, before I even start reading the story.

Heavy downer! A lot of suffering.

Look Karen was a true submissive! All of the documentation from the detective showed Caroline was the master of her relationship with Karen. Bob has it made. Bob has a submissive wife. All he has to do is properly train her to become her sole master. She would then only respond to his orders. We are talking about a little discipline here on her ass! Doesn’t every husband want a sex slave wife! As soon as you enter and close your front door, your wife would be kneeling nude in front of you with her head down. You would just stand there while she slowly removed your pants then started sucking your cock! And yes she would always swallow your load, smiling all of the time as she looks into your eyes. She then leads you to the bedroom and strips you of all clothes. She sucks your cock to make it steel again. She then lubs your cock. She then pulls out her butt plug, climbs to the bed on her hands and knees with her gaping butt hole pointed at you. You drop some lub into her butt hole then you ram your cock into her ass and fuck her hard. She cums wildly when you cum. God, what a life. So Bob would be an idiot to divorce Karen! I wish my wife was submissive.

Read it again. It really is a very good story. Somehow, I would think another woman would hurt less only in so far as it is less of a rejection, but lies are lies and cheat is cheat. There was no real choice here.

Caroline, the cheating bitch, got.exactly what she deserved. It's sad that she destroyed so many other people with her selfish perversion.

It was sad how the wife just flushed 23 years of a loving marriage down the tube. She should have known what probably would have happened if he ever found out about an affair with another woman and his sister-in-law no less. As the saying goes we reap what we sow. Well written- 5 stars

We always think of the husband and wife, and then there are the children. So many lives are damaged by adultery: friends, relatives, neighbors, the list goes on. The people who love us feel our pain and everyone must find a way to move forward. Good story, but the last bit after the confrontation was the best.

I liked the story. Like in real life, the story only ends when the protagonist dies. It is not a HEA story. It is a real life story. I liked it a lot. 5*

But, and it is a Big But, this story needs more. More explaining from the errant wife, the sister in law, Bob the brother in law, the children. more. just more.

The WHO and WHY never matter...she made a choice and had an affair that lasted more than 6 months before the husband confronted her. Sure, she "loved him"....except her love and his was never enough for her to not cheat in the first place. People get complacent and greedy and never are satisfied with their life....till is all gone.

I was just rereading this and it hit me like a thunderbolt! It's like a new story! Think about it: Who else would be close enough to Caroline to catch the two of them? Obviously they were somewhat careful, but a beloved son and nephew would have full access to both houses AND his mother's computer, wouldn't he?

Also, he would probably be horrified and irreparably scarred by seeing his loving mother bully his loving aunt into fucking her ass with a strapon, calling her horrible names the whole way through... Sounds like the kind of thing that would make you never talk to your mother again, hate women in general and always feel kinda fucked up around your dad, doesn't it? Yeah, his son saw it. He didn't just find out, he SAW it, and he blew the whistle and blew his family up, and he blames her, women and himself.

I respect that you are the story author, but there is a hole in the story when you don't complete the immediate situation.

Husband made exactly the correct decision and stuck with it. Man or woman, cheating is cheating.

The story was very one sided and the writer(c2) had so much to explore and came up woefully short. Like WHY did she do it? Did she have mental problems or have a vendetta against her husbands family to involve Karen? What did the parents of Bob/Mark think/do? What did the parents of the Lesbo wives do? I assume Bob/Karen had no children?

What happens when the full story got out in the community and for the faimilies?

What is missing is the grief of ALL the 'Collateral Damage" - for that this story only gets a 3*.

I think the “ire” directed at the husband is because, after he made the decision to confront his wife and kick her cheating ass to the curb, he sat around trying to figure out what he did wrong, why it was all his fault, and crying in his damn beer. If he had stood up and “Owned” his decision and moved forward without all the self-doubt, second guessing, and self-pity, I believe he would have garnered a hell of a lot more respect. And, for me at least, the husband’s maudlin turn to self-doubt and self-pity pretty much ruined the story.

According to this author, logic apparently works like this.....

... "SHE cheated but it's MY fault."

... "I reacted to HER cheating so the ultimate consequences are MY fault."

... "Believing in honoring my promises and commitments and then learning that I've been betrayed by the partner who made those same promises and commitments to me make my shock, disappointment and anger MY fault."

... "Friends and people stupidly jumping to conclusions is MY fault."

When you think about it objectively, who would actually buy into that line of warped b.s.? Too many authors are getting away with peddling their fucked up crud as good prose. Readers should take a step back and scrutinize some these stories with the 'would this shit fly in real life?' mindset. There are too many excellent authors on this site whose work is insulted by allowing these jerkoff authors to have ratings as good as theirs is. This is one of those warped authors fucked up stories. It's rated a full point higher than it deserves to be.

"I know that as a responsible adult, I am the author of my own misfortune."

Erm, no.

The wife had an affair with her sister-in-law. She is entirely responsible for the destruction of their marriage. No matter what Mark did that "Black Friday", Caroline was the one that cheated on him and wrecked their relationship.

To all those saying "he should have joined them for a threesome!"... Karen was his brother's wife! If he caught his wife domming some hot random girl, he might have had the option to join in and fuck them both, but he loved his brother, Mark wouldn't have just screwed him over like that.

Also, the wife doing anal with Karen while refusing to do that with Mark shows that she didn't really love her husband. Any wife that does things for her lover that she refuses to do for her husband doesn't love her spouse.

Then there's the 6 months of deceit and destruction of trust which applies whether his wife's lover is male or female. I agree that girl-on-girl action is hot, and a female lover just isn't the same level of betrayal as a male one... but Caroline still betrayed him. Their relationship would never be the same again, and that's ALL his wife's fault, not the husband's.

Not sure why there's so much ire directed towards the husband, he made a decision and stuck with it.

For me, the very best of your LW stories. A man with the strength to follow through with his plan. A man of his convictions. Would have been good to know more about what caused her to have the affair. The first one? Something in her past, or maybe a mental problem. We don't know her side, but we don't really need to know to love the ending.

then it's great. There are only a few writers how write about real men.

He just did what he had to do. Good job.

Good strong husband character who didnt take crap from his lying cheating slut wife.

Sanctimonius comments written by girly-men who dont understand what FORSAKING ALL OTHERS means. Rug-munchers in action? Ewwww, gross!!!!

No explanation, no reconciliation. Just a traffic accident.

What a fucked up asshole the husband is.

I agree with the previous comment about lesbian love being a turn on for most men.

I also agree with the earlier comment about the hubby being a sanctimonious dipshit.

This story gets a *4 for writing and editing not for content !

Most of the cheating spouse stories have the incident, the aftermath and then the parties moving on with their lives. This story has the incident, the cold brutal aftermath and then just wallows in its misery. Perhaps, I see this as a different type of infidelity than that where another man is the lover. I also have a problem with the two scantimonius brothers.

It's hard to like a story the main characters are unlikable

What a depressing story.

cheating is cheating but main character did come across as a holier than thou sanctimoneous prick, possible reason for her cheating, hard to respect someone like that.

It is easy to understand his being upset, but going nuclear without a conversation with a woman with whom he has spent more than half his life is extreme. Granted his wife’s behaviour goes beyond juvenile college dorm curiosity, but his reaction is extreme; he wants to totally destroy her life and that sounds like hateful Deep South fire and brimstone fundamentalism, which is just as repugnant as Islamic fundamentalism that Christians find so alien; can we say hypocritical?

What a dumb stupid brainless Moron! My Wife often has a Girls night with her twin sister and Sister in law Rebecca! It's the Greatest turn on in our relationship! Myself,

my brother and brother in law all enjoy the girls night out ! We have front row seats

Our sister Rebecca has been having the Twins over our house since High School,

oh Just so you know Bob the Brother in law is Cindy and Mindy's Brother!

Thanks for sharing this Fantastic story with us !★ ★ ★ ★ ★ WOOF!

OH I also like Lesbians Batchelorette Parties, WOOF WOOF! BYE

What he had to do and what he needed to do. The thing now is living with it. He needs to find a way of moving on. Probably the only genuine choice he has.

Arrogant, pompous and cruel.

I really don't think it's very plausible that most guys would go so ballistic if their wife was with a woman. Could be kind of a turn on.

I respectfully disagree. I see this more like Lady Macbeth washing and washing yet the damned spot just won't go away. In my twenties, I divorced for irreconcilable differences. No great emotion, just dissolution of a faulty partnership. Yet, for years I was haunted by doubts and thoughts of what might have been. In a divorce as emotional as this one, the mud may never wash off.

I didn't much care for the title as the story focused on the involved parties. Even Bob is directly involved. The collateral parties are the children, the unseen friends (who are usually forced to choose a side) and the employees abandoned by Bob and probably by Mark. Plenty of future damage there.

Still, I enjoyed the story and the bomb making structure was clever. 5 stars. JPR

I think it is an interesting perspective, a look at the hypothetical damage that can happen from a scenario like this.

There is one perspective that is missing, and I am surprised the author missed it....except...maybe this is a case of focusing only on the bad outcomes.

There is a sense of cleanliness one feels after getting rid of a cheater. One feels clean and whole again in a way. Yes there is the pain and anger and all of that, but when that person is gone it's like...

It's like going to a mud race and then taking a hot shower, rinsing all of that filth off is SUCH a good feeling. To be clean again, living with an unrepentant cheater is like never getting that mud off. It stains you and chafes all the time.

That is one aspect that I am surprised doesn't seem to get mentioned much. There are other benefits as well...but I am sure coaster2 already knows or has detailed them in other stories.

Sincerely,

Payenbrant

So real it hurts. Still five stars and still a favorite.

Not up to your usual standards. No twists, turns or interests. Bam and it over in the first paragraph.

It needed more umph!

Seems like it needed a second part.

Well as a lawyer you should know one when you see one

The author is a pompous, sanctimonious, ass.

Space aliens stole all her private parts as well......as part of the divorce settlement.

Also Elvis followed her everywhere she went for the rest of her life screaming "cheating slut" at the top of his voice.

You might as well have included that as it would not have made the story any less realistic.

There is not 1 person in the entire world who would have accepted what the wife accepted in the divorce,.

Might as well have president Kennedy shoot her from the book depository as she leaves court just to put her out of her misery

2*

A good read with a great deal of emotion to wade through by our hero husband.

Like most emotional lead stories there is a wide diverse of reader comments.

From a cheating wife, inabke to trust her in the future to joining in a FFM !

I tried to look at this problem if it happened to me.

TBH I am not sure whst I would do, for sure the deception, cheating , bisexuality are big issues to deal with. The killer for me is the wife never allowed her husband anal sex, yet the wife openly encourages her submissive sex slave to plough her bum with with strapon !

This denial to me when be the deal breaker as there is little reward for it being offered post affsir dicovery !

Here's part of the problem for the previous poster, would you ever believe that you could ever truly trust her? She knew what she was doing was wrong otherwise she wouldn't have hidden it. If she respected him she could have at least asked or told him she wanted to see what it was like with a woman and possibly both of them.

There is far more to a relationship than Sex, but with that sex in a marriage also comes trust. At least have the courage and respect to ask, a fantasy is not the same as a 6 month affair.

Any guy who has thought about having a FFM with the wife has to realize that the girls must be bi-sexual. He should have just walked into on them and fucked both of them!

But I think he took everything too personal. He acted like everything was his fault. It wasn't. She and his sister in-law were totally responsible for everything. I included the sister in-law because she wasn't kidnapped or forced into doing this. She could have gone to her husband and told him before things got started, but she didn't. I really liked the story but it lost a star for his attitude afterwards. He had his own company and someone like that would be able to figure this out.

Still love it. Probably your best.

The basic story isn't bad.

I have a problem with the details though, as in some other stories in this genre.

That the rumour mill could be so effective as to destroy her real estate career.

That Bob cold sue her for alienation of any sort.

That he has any right to his Grandmothers ring. As an engagement ring, once they were married it is hers. Who else would want it anyways.

That she would be a recluse all of her days. She would get over him. She would get over her foolishness. She would find a man who wouldn't mind her dalliances on the clammy side. Any she would live happily ever after, except for the regret of how she hurt a good man.

She's the one who provided the TNT! He needs to remember that and move on. Good story. 5

“What will I do without you?” – Maybe the same thing you’ve been doing WITH him, fucking around!

I agree with most of the comments supporting his actions.

One thing sticks with me that I at least haven't noticed any comments on, and it may seem relatively minor to some/many, and that's the anal sex.

How a wife who "lo-o-oves" her husband can give ANYTHING to her lover that she denies her husband is beyond me.

The whole story is just a rehash if the LW category. Even the twist of another woman really isn't, though half the assholes in . LW would have the husband cucking Bob like idiots with Bob's wife for revenge on Caroline. Lots of moron writers in this category so stars for keeping it intelligent.

He planned, assembled, and blew the bomb? Sorry, but no he wasn't the one. He may have felt a need to be the "active" member of the relationship, but in truth he was only reacting to the results of a bomb blast in his life. She was the mad bomber. She was the one who planned, assembled, and detonated the bomb. When she was busted her protestations of "love" are as ridiculous and they are insulting. Her excuses and explanations were equally filled with lies. Here is the reality: actions speak the truth much louder and more accurately than words ever do.

1. She planned: She cheated on her husband, her children and her marriage over a long period of time. She had no love or respect left for anyone except her ego. Typical of many real estate agents.

2. She built the bomb over many months: She fucked her sister in law, she had no love, respect, common courtesy for her in-laws marriage or family's happiness.

3. She detonated the bomb: they were fucking in their own houses. Of course they'd get caught eventually. They were rubbing their husband's noses in it. They were two depraved homosexuals, no wonder they did something so stupid and selfish.

The sad thing is that this otherwise wealthy man cannot move on. After 23 years of marriage and a bad marriage at that, he should have been happy to be out from under that burden. They fact that she instructed him not to call her on Friday's speaks volumes about their shitty relationship. I have never seen a good marriage succumb to adultery, it doesn't happen because the spouses have too much to lose. So if your spouse cheats on you, thank them for giving you a "get out marriage free" card and divorce their smelly ass. There is a lot more to life than toleration a shitty marriage. After the kids are gone, who really needs a wife? Sure women like husbands - they pay the bills but what does an old unloving wife do for you? Clean the house? Cook a dinner? Throw you some sex once in blue moon? All of the above could better be achieved through other means. Nope, sorry to the ladies out there: he is far better off without a selfish leach stuck to his neck.

Back in 1958 a woman friend,married with 3 children all under 12 walked in on her husband of 15 years and his male lover in Ft.Worth,Tx the affair could not be hushed up and totally destroyed their family. !!!

one tries to maintain and even keel, but even that is sometimes not probable. TK U MLJ LV NV

He should stop second-guessing himself.

He was TOTALLY in the right, even if I was to forgive the initial "experimentation", if, as I said in my earlier comment "it was always better" with him, then why continue?

just stumbled across this story after about a year reading cheating wives stories and it was a good one. Great shock value, loved the no differentiating between woman and male cheating, and loved the no RAAC 5 stars

Why blame the victim?

Hes to blame for defending himself?

The situation was perpetuated by her.

He had to accept it or do what he had every right to do.

Also he didn't get even, he merely couldn't live with infidelity, lies and betrayal.

Blaming the victim as you did in the final paragraph is the root of a lot of the worlds problems.

As was noted in previous comments, the characters were very flat. Other than the disgust towards the cheating spouse, there was no reason to like any of the characters because there was no empathetic build up of the characters.

However...

What a great 'what if?'! What if a monogamous couple had a spouse get caught same-sex cheating? On this site, she squeamish factor of male-male cheating would just about automatically write the ending in any category other than Gay Male. I've seen girl-girl in almost every other category, though. What if she was cheating with another woman? Brilliant! Any interest of the girl-girl sex aside, how would the 'cheating wife' be viewed if she was cheating with another woman?

An excellent concept, but only marginal development and presentation. I'm sorry, but there is no reason to like or emotionally empathize with any of the characters presented in the story. Go back and try the idea again, and give your readers a reason to care about the people in the story. Five stars for the concept, two stars for presentation, four stars over all because I believe the underlying concept should be rewarded.

Thanks!

VisualPerv

"It was always better with you."

If that's the case, then why continue?

The ending was predetermined by the anonymous phone call as was the ending of my first love seventy years ago. Writing was good and story well told. Cheers!

Three arguments against reconciliation:

The length of the affair.

The lying.

The anal sex (which hubby wasn't allowed).

stop screaming hysterically at the author, get your juice box and go back down to the basement. The adults are trying to talk here.

interesting & engaging

well written , remarkable plot .

and an ending that has the reader as well as the main protagonist reflecting on the events & outcome.

sublime.

xxxhugsxxx

For those of you so lacking in critical thinking skills, ( which means to be able to use logic and reason to think a problem or situation thru ) just giving up her ass to the strap on should be clue enough to the clueless, but if that isn't having sex is having sex. The lying, manipulating, the withholding sex, because believe me with the clamps and toys they were using on or the other would have been out of action to hide the evidence. Just because you have some girl on girl fantasy doesn't make this any less cheating, except that its all fiction of course.

Why do people who claim to be in total love with spouses and family cheat? It is a conscious decision and people make it all the time. I guess stupidity rules. It's a damn shame.

I can see how all of his introspection and doubt would seem to some like he was blaming himself for what happened, but I don't exactly see it that way. 23 years is a long time to love someone and to live with that same person. I think that after the pain and the hurt and the rage dulls a little bit it would only be natural for him to have second thoughts about what he had done, if only to place the events in the proper sequence. He knows he will miss her but he also knows that what she did was irreconcilable and he has to live with that. The damage done to him, his marriage and his children are all and only the result of what his wife chose to do. He also, through no fault of his own, lost the closeness he had shared with his brother, also the fault of his wife. His emotions and his thoughts have to be all over the place. The stages of grief have numbers and title designations but they don't necessarily happen in numerical order. Good story, well written and again, oh so sad for everyone concerned.

I pretty much enjoyed this sad tale until the very end. That the husband feels HE was the one that CAUSE this woe struck me as absurd. He needs help if he doesn't see the truth.

It is time for the characters in the story to seek counseling.

maybe the readers should too.

(thus my handle, lol).

Karen, you are mostly correct. No-fault simply means that you don't have to state a reason for requesting dissolution of the marriage.

Most deal with property settlement on what is called an equitable distribution basis. This means it is supposed to be fair. A court will generally NOT consider factors like adultery or misbehavior (other than abuse) in determining what is a fair property settlement. The court will, in most cases, look at who contributed what to the property (i.e., if one spouse got an inheritance that makes up a disproportionate amount of the assets, the court should consider that in distributing the assets). An exception is if the infidelity used money. If a cheating spouse bought expensive presents for a boyfriend/girlfriend, or had a secret apartment, or paid for hotels all the time, the court would consider those expenditures in the equitable distribution.

Custody is a separate matter. The standard in every state is "whats in best interest of the child." Often, their is a bias to the mother, probably because she is more likely to be the principal caregiver and have a closer bond with the child. But that is hardly as "hard and fast" as it used to be. Also, if a spouse does dangerous things, like drinking, or drugs or the like, that will heavily weigh in favor of other parent. Usually, past in fidelity will not be regarded as a significant factor in deciding what's in best interest of a child, though if an older child who is asked by the court or a counselor what they want (and this does happen) and they hate one parent's new significant other, that will be considered.

Sorry for the long winded answer. As I said, I am a recovering lawyer and we have to take one day at a time :)