All Comments on 'Desires within Young Girls Ch. 01'

Much to slow and much to abrupt. Plus not believable even as a fantasy. These things don't happen to 18 year olds. They happen to 13 - 14 year olds.

all build up and no pay off. the story ended just as it was getting started. please post chapter two soon.

Good start, but much too short.

Well written. Nice story developement. Tempting and teasing on both parts. Keep the tension happening, and the temptation definitely needs to continue Thank you.

Too short, and ending was too abrupt.

hope you continue

Has great potential!