D'Orgasmic Chronicles Ch. 11

"Let's go see how Lindsay is doing," Mark suggested.

"Whoa, this area is off limits," Ted said as they approached. Johnny stood beside him and it was clear that their presence was not welcomed backstage tonight.

"What the hell?" Gary laughed. "Why do I feel like I have leprosy?"

"Because boss, tonight you do. Brenda gave us specific instructions and a message for you two," Johnny grinned.

"What message?" Mark asked.

"You two are to get your asses out there and smoosh with everyone. She said she has everything under control. Go, drink, shake hands, get laid, just get the fuck away from here."

Gary looked at Mark and burst out laughing. "I can hear her saying that, Can't you?"

"Oh yeah, I sure can."

They walked out and looked in the restaurant. It was packed.

They walked into the store, which was also jammed. Vicki and the sales staff were running around like crazy. Pierre came out into the front of the store with a light meter around his neck.

"Hi guys. Tonight is going to be terrific. It's a madhouse back there. Trust me, you are going to love everything," he told them as he rushed out onto the runway to check his readings.

They walked back and immediately rushed by their models. Ann and Greta ran into their arms and kissed them passionately.

"Dammit girls," Shannon yelled. "Get your asses back in the makeup chair. There will be plenty of time for that later once we are back to normal."

She turned and the Asian fire burned deep in her eyes. "You two, get the fuck out of here. Get a drink, meet the people. Go, shoo, leave now!"

They turned, bowed their heads, and walked out of the rear of the store. "Exactly when did we lose control?" Gary asked.

"I'm beginning to believe we never had it," Mark laughed as they walked into the Velvet Glove.

Hank was at the door. "There are a lot of people in here who want to talk to you. Lori is over there and Michele is in Country Girl. The first people you want to talk to are over there."

"I'm thirsty," Gary, grinned.

"Coming right up boss," Hank said as they walked over to Donald Trump and Sir Richard Branson.

"We are definitely impressed," Donald told them as they approached. "This is quite a concept."

"What the hell is this, Hooter's on steroids?" Richard asked. "Everyone is so good looking. If the food is as good as the wait staff, I just may move in here."

"Well hell, we have to keep up to your standards," Mark laughed. "You two set the bar; we've just tried to keep up. How have you two been? It's been a while."

"I've been good," Donald said. "Tonight will be fun because I am not talking politics. For once, I'm going to have a good time. I am anxious to meet these women in your lives."

"I've seen the photos too," Richard said. "In fact, I have the photo of a very nicely filled out football jersey in my office. I saw that and laughed. Only you would think of that."

"Hey, don't blame me. I had nothing to do with that."

Donald laughed as a waitress handed Mark and Gary a drink. "No, I imagine I know which three fools came up with that. How are they doing anyway?"

"They are fine but pissed at us tonight. They couldn't be here and I know we are going to pay for this."

"You're going to pay, don't talk to me about that," Donald laughed. "Melania and Ivanka are in the store."

"I am so impressed with Ivanka's new line," Gary told him. "It's elegant. Shannon drools over it too."

"You better pay that woman a lot of money Gary," Donald warned him. "My daughter has deep pockets too."

"Don't I know it," Gary grinned. "We'll catch up to you later. We have to make the rounds."

They spent the next half-hour talking to everyone. Jim found them and took them into the recording booth. "Holly is outfitted, now, it is just you two," he said as he handed each of them an earpiece and wired them up for sound. "It is going to be crazy with two clubs opening. We have reserved a VIP suite for you. You'll be able to see everything. We can communicate with you if we need you at a specific location."

The press was inside and the Center lights dimmed.

"Ladies and Gentlemen. Welcome to the Grand Opening of the Orlando D'Orgasmic Entertainment Complex. We'd like to start the evening off with a bang. I direct your attention to the main lobby or any of the screens throughout the complex," the announcer said as the music elevated and the fashion show was underway.

Gasps were heard as Cherry and Ronnie made their first pass along the runway. They looked stunning and a buzz was heard all over the place. Shannon and Pierre had elected to show the Clubwear line first and it was spectacular. When Diane walked out onto the runway, the crowd jumped to their feet.

Mark looked at Gary, "What the hell?"

"She informed Jill that she was not going to be left out of this no matter what," he smiled.

The crowd went wild as possibly the most famous fashion model in the world floated down the runway wearing another Shannon Prong original. Karen and Tori had the MC duties well in hand, and had the crowd going with each new arrival. There definitely was a buzz in the room.

"Ladies and Gentlemen," the announcer broke in, "We can't forget the cowgirls in our lives."

The lights went down. The spotlight lit and Gary's jaw dropped. Wendy appeared wearing a deep purple suede hat, matching vest and chaps. The vest caressed her breasts and the friction turned her nipples into rock hard diamonds. Her stiletto purple western boots completed the outfit. It was breathtaking. All eyes were on this amazing creature as she walked down that runway. When she turned, revealing her perfect ass to the world, the place erupted. People were hooting and hollering with approval.

Gary was stunned and Mark was laughing his head off. People were applauding and loving it.

"Wait a minute, wait a minute. You, model girl, stay right where you are," a voice commanded over the sound system. "Mark Banner, I want to see you right now. Come to the front of the runway."

Mark stopped laughing and walked to the runway. The spotlight shone on a woman and Mark as well. A gorgeous woman dressed in a matching gray suede outfit walked seductively down that runway with a microphone in her hand. The crowd recognized Carmen Electra and the applause went off the chart.

"Mark, you're my lawyer. I want you to sue this woman. She stole my legs."

Two full minutes later, when the laughter died down, she took Wendy's hand and twirled her around.

"Look, do you see that? Those are my legs dammit. Do something about this."

Jim held a microphone in to Mark, "Well, the way I see it, I appear to have several options."

The place was in hysterics. Wendy took the microphone and grabbed Carmen's hand. "Excuse me lady," she said as she twirled Carmen around to another crushing round of applause. "You stole my legs."

They put their arms around each other and strutted off the runway.

"Well I'll be damned," Gary said as Mark faded back to him. "They got us. I wasn't expecting that."

"That was hot. Dammit, that was hot."

The Country Catalog was enthusiastically received, and the show was a definite hit. The crush of people entering the store scared Vicki but she handled it perfectly.

Melania and Ivanka Trump walked up to them, "Gary, you blew me away. The industry has been buzzing about these new creations but it pales compared to the real thing. You keep this up, you'll put me out of business," Ivanka smiled.

Gary kissed her cheek and whispered, "I'm glad we aren't direct competitors. I love your new line too. I had better be on my best behavior. Girl, you have definitely grown up."

"We'll see you later," Melania beamed. "We warned Donald; don't let him tell you otherwise." They turned and walked into the store. "How many of these women do you think they've done?"

"Conservatively, I'd say ninety percent," Ivanka winked as she made her way into the store.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, the Country Girl Saloon show will begin in fifteen minutes. The Velvet glove show will begin at 8pm."

"Let's go track down Holly," Mark said.

"I heard you. Where are you?" her voice boomed in his ear.

"We are out by the runway darling," Mark told her. "I forgot we had these things. Is Tammy with you?"

"Yes dear, we'll be right out."

Jim came out and took them to the VIP viewing area he had set up especially for them. "I'll give you a 5 minute warning."

The Country Girl Stage came to life on every monitor and big screen.

The club was filled with press and recording executives. The lights dimmed and a hush fell over the crowd.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, The Country Girl Saloon is honored to introduce to you, a woman who needs no introduction at all. Please put your hands together and welcome the one and only Coal Miner's Daughter, Ladies and Gentlemen, Miss Loretta Lynn."

Loretta walked out on stage to a standing ovation. Inside the club, the Velvet Glove audience was standing and screaming as well.

The band started to play and Loretta looked out and raised her microphone. "Well, I was born a coal miners daughter," she began.

"I don't believe this," Gary stammered.

"She said she couldn't perform," Mark gasped.

"Thank you ladies and gentlemen. Thank you so much. I am so honored to have this opportunity tonight. For me, there is more than one personal reason I'm here but I'll tell you that later. Right now, I'd like to tell you why this is special to me. For all of you who know my story, you know just how hard it is to make it in this business.

Anyone who has ever graced a stage knows that no matter how talented you are, you have to get noticed to get ahead in this business.

That fashion show a few minutes ago reminded me that yes, saying I was horny on the radio got me noticed. My voice did the rest.

It is hard for new artists to get noticed because it is very hard for you, the record executives to be exposed to those talented new people working the honky tonks and clubs across this country.

Well tonight, you'll get your first chance to see two fabulous new groups here in the Country Girl Saloon and two more in the Velvet Glove."

"Did you say four new groups?" an unmistakable voice asked over the speakers.

"Yes I did girlfriend and if you're going to help me you better get your pretty butt out here," Loretta said.

The spotlight focused on a spectacular redhead as she walked out onto the stage.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, put your hands together for my dear friend, Reba McIntyre," Loretta said, her eyes twinkling as she looked up to where they sat.

"Are you getting this," Jim asked as the camera's closed in on Gary, Holly and Mark's faces."

"They are stunned. Positively stunned," Pierre grinned.

"Good Evening Orlando, It's great to be here. I imagine there are more than a few shocked people in here tonight. Well, let me tell you this. Loretta is so right, this is a tough business. When I see people succeed, it makes me so happy. If I can be a part in helping someone succeed, it makes my heart sing. Tonight, you are a part of music history. To my knowledge, there has never been anything to equal this. This club is for you, the audience, but that is not unusual. What is unusual is that this club is also set up to introduce the new artists to the recording industry," Reba told the audience. "Before this night is over, you will learn many things you didn't know."

"I know a secret," Loretta grinned.

"What's that darlin?" Reba asked.

"I know how this club got its name."

"Tell me the story."

"Over a year ago, a tight knit group of thirty-six unemployed, highly skilled and competent Cordon Bleu educated chefs and restaurant managers met three fantastic people and they became friends. Those three people, Gary Edwards, Mark Banner, and Holly Jackson decided to invest in those young people and this is the result. You'll meet them tonight. This fascinating group of people will be managing the new clubs as soon as they open."

"New clubs? There is going to be more than one club?" That's interesting."

"All in all, over the next three years, there will be fifty clubs across the USA and Canada."

"That's fantastic, but how did the club get its name?"

"Those young people heard a song and they put together a dance routine to it. Do you want to see it?"

The crowd went wild.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure to introduce one of the fastest rising stars today. Give a big Orlando welcome to Luke Bryan," Loretta said.

Behind them, the laser curtain faded and Luke's stage swung into view. Opposite him, the floating dancer's stage swung into view. He started to play 'Country Girl (Shake it for me) and they began to dance.

Everyone was on stage except Ronnie. Luke sang and the dancers danced. Staci danced out on stage and Luke smiled at her as he sang. Ronnie and Cherry danced onto the stage and danced over to Staci. Luke looked and almost missed a beat.

"Are you kidding me?" Reba laughed as she looked onto the stage.

"Amazing isn't it?" Loretta said. "He sure wasn't expecting this. Those three are almost identical."

Luke finished the song and Loretta and Reba met him onstage.

"Ladies and gentlemen, give a big round of applause to our very talented dancers. I told you about them, these are the actual people who will be running these clubs."

Staci walked over and hugged Luke.

Reba laughed, "What's the matter Luke?"

"I sure didn't expect this. This is amazing." He looked at Cherry and then to Ronnie. "You told me there were two women who resembled Staci but this is beyond belief."

"Well darlin, I think I should introduce these three lovely women. The amazing creature in the video is Staci Flood," Loretta said as she held her hand.

"I have the great pleasure of introducing you to Miss Cherry Anderson of the Pro Bowl fame and Miss Ronnie Walker. Aren't they spectacular?" Reba said. "I want to make sure I have this right. Ronnie was the girl that put that dance number together, and basically started this thing in motion. You will recognize her as the star of that super sexy D'Orgasmic Country Clubwear Catalog."

The guests rose and gave her a standing ovation.

Reba walked over to Cherry and put her arm around her. "Is there a living soul who hasn't seen this woman? Yes, this is the woman in the most downloaded photo of last year. You saw her. You saw that famous football jersey. This is the one and only, Cherry Anderson."

The place went wild. Cherry looked out into the audience and saw two faces, beaming with pride. Her former bosses, Ted and George were at the edge of the stage and they had tears in their eyes.

"When you pick up that nearly x-rated Clubwear Catalog, woohoo is that thing hot, you'll see Cherry in there. She is, amongst other things, the lead model for that line of clothing," Reba said. "Now, since we are introducing some very important people that all of you need to get to know, I want to introduce someone you've all seen many, many times. Ladies and gents, here she is, D'Orgasmic Elegance Supermodel and simply one of the nicest women on the planet. Let's hear it for Diane Warren."

Again, everyone was standing and cheering. Diane kissed Ronnie and Cherry as the rest of the models filled in behind them.

Gary got a five-minute warning. He grabbed Tammy's hand and they left the booth.

Loretta had left the stage. "Reba, there are four people I want to introduce right now," she said from backstage. Can you ask them to come up here baby, I'll be right out."

"Sure I will. Let's see, who should it be? Oh, I know. Would Ainsley Norris, Shannon Prong, Gary Edwards, and Jeremy Carter please join us on this stage.

Gary stopped dead in his tracks.

"What did she say?" Mark yelled from the booth.

"I heard it too," he said as he walked toward the stage.

Ainsley and Shannon had shocked looks on their faces as they met Gary out front. "This can't be," Shannon said. "He isn't that stupid."

Gary looked and saw Nom and Phoc seated at a table. Their expressions assured him, "We're okay, he's not here," Gary said. They walked onto the stage as Patsy Cline sung 'Crazy'.

"When I finally made it to Nashville, I met the woman who was, for far too short a time, my best friend, Patsy Cline. She was the brightest star. She asked me to appear with her. I really was a coal miner's daughter. I had nothing to wear to go on stage with her. I met three people. Wait a minute. Where is Jeremy Carter?"

The jumbo screens came to life and Jeremy's smiling face appeared. "Hello Loretta."

"Thank God," Mark sighed.

"I was sitting in a coffee shop and talking to a friend. I was upset because I didn't have anything to wear. Two young women were in the next booth and they overheard me. They introduced themselves and told me that they would be happy to design something for me. Jeremy, Gary, those two women were your mothers. This dress, is the dress that a new and unheard of company called D'Orgasmic Clothing Company made for me a lifetime ago. Your parents were good friends of mine. I miss them dearly.

But that is not all. At the same time, I met a lovely man who was one of the most talented men I've ever known. He owned a little custom boot shop. That man was Bill Norris. Ainsley is his daughter. Earlier this year, Gary Edwards bought Norris Boots but this man is not only sexy, he is smart as well. Ainsley still runs Norris Boots under the D'Orgasmic flag. These boots I am wearing are the very same boots Bill made me back then. I've worn them for years and they are still in perfect shape. Now, talk about fate. What are the chances that these two people would get together and then contact me. I wouldn't miss this for the world."

"You know something Loretta, this redhead is feeling a little out of my league here with all these gorgeous women. I'd like to introduce the real star of the show. Now every man knows that a stunning Asian goddess is better than a steak or a pickup truck right?"

That got a standing ovation.

"What did you think of the fashions you saw here tonight?

Another standing ovation, louder than the first.

"Let me introduce you to the creative genius that is D'Orgasmic Lingerie. Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce you to Miss Shannon Prong."

Shannon took a well-deserved bow.

Gary took her arm, "It is a good thing he was on that screen. Otherwise, there would be four castrated transexuals."

"I'd kill them before you got a chance at them," Shannon said. "Conjugal visits tend to stifle creativity and I have to be creative."

"Loretta, didn't you say we had to go next door and help Beyoncé for a minute?" Reba asked.

"Yes and we are going to let these wonderful people watch. Luke, play us another song darling."

Luke played 'I Don't Want This Night to End' as Reba and Loretta walked next door.

They walked into the club and received a standing ovation as they shook hands and walked up onto the stage.

Reba looked at an empty stage, then out into the crowd. Gary and Tammy had arrived inside the club and watched.

"I guess we got here a little early. Beyoncé isn't here yet," Reba said. "Can't you smell that wonderful aroma coming from that restaurant? I had the best-baked beans in there tonight. Wow, are they ever good. Try them folks; you'll never forget the taste."

"Sorry girls," Beyoncé said as she walked out on stage in a golden outfit that Shannon had created for her. The crowd went wild. They stood, clapped, and yelled as this vision of elegance walked out on stage. Both audiences were on their feet when Beyoncé started to speak.

"I'm so glad you liked My Grandma's baked beans Reba. They are a secret family recipe," Beyoncé said.

"They may be a secret family recipe but they are my Grandmother's secret family recipe," Linda said as she walked out onto the stage wearing the identical outfit.