Elizabeth To Beth Ch. 03

"Yes, Ma'am.........."

The storm hit us full force overnight. Richard was up before me and outside with the tractor plowing the driveway while I made us breakfast.

Richard came in covered in snow from head to foot like a snowman. I met him outside of the mudroom door with a steaming cup of strong black coffee after he shed his wet cloths.

I was thinking, 'we definitely need some new rubber mats for out boots and shoes.... I'd like to paint this room a bright yellow to brighten it up a bit....oh yes new curtains and white lace sheers on the widows....green curtains over the lace sheers will look nice' These thoughts made me smile because this was my house now and I'm sure he'd let me paint or do almost anything I wanted within reason so I kissed his cold cheek.

"Beth, what did one snowman say to the other snowman?"

"I don't know, what did he say?"

"Do you smell carrots?" What a funny, silly thing to say; he had me laughing. This was the first joke I heard my sweetheart tell so I kissed his lips and ruffled his hair, flattened from his knit watch cap hat.

"Wow, what a sunny smile on a cold winter morning. Is that all I get?" he asked tugging on my braid.

"Of course not, I'll make you bacon and eggs."

"How about a hug and then another kiss with your intoxicating lips?"

"Close the door first; you're letting all the heat out. Do you think money grows on trees?"

"You sound exactly like a wife when you talk like that," Richard put his coffee cup on the counter to hug me and gave my ass a playful slap "Would you mind running upstairs and getting my slippers; my feet are cold. And oh yes my pipe and tobacco. How did that sound?"

"You sound like a typical husband," I put my arms around my big sweetheart's neck and kissed his lips," You don't smoke, remember. You don't own a pair of slippers and you already put on dry wool socks and sneakers."

"Oh yes, since that's the case let's have breakfast and afterward I'll help you prepare our Christmas dinner....."

We played Christmas music singing along as we bustled about the kitchen, lighthearted and happy, chopping this and mixing that; preparing our meal together. It had been far too long for me while it was Beth's first time; my first time with her. We were lovers...we were partners...we were soon to be married.

Christmas presents weren't necessary we had each other and we celebrated our holiday with intimate touches, hugs and kisses.

I was taking our special turkey out of the oven when the doorbell rang and Beth left to answer it.

'Who can that possibly be in this weather?' I was thinking, 'If I hadn't taken the time off work one of those idiots would be me. Other than necessary services such as the Police or emergencies only a nut case would be out now with the roads closed down.'

"Sweetheart," Beth called from the front door, "there's somebody here to see you."

I put the turkey pan on the stove lifting the cover to admire our carefully basted and wonderfully browned bird. I went to the front door not bothering to take off the oven mitts. Beth was standing by the closed front door. She put her arms around my neck and kissed my lips, "I love you," she cooed, walking away smiling.

I opened the door....there was nobody there. It was still snowing so hard you couldn't see three feet in any direction.

I turned on the porch to face the open door and hollered inside, "Beth there's....."Somebody grabbed me from behind and pulled me right off the porch into the snow. Did you ever try and make a fist wearing oven mitts?

Caught by surprise whoever it was managed to get me in a wrist lock and up on my toes....damn that hurt.

"Good afternoon, my son. It's colder than the devil's heart out here."

"Father Stanislaus. What are you doing out in weather like this?"

"I'm here to see my favorite cousin and talk to you. You gave me quite the black eye. I arranged for someone to cover for me for the next two weeks. I'm taking my vacation early," he increased the pressure on my wrist.

"You can let go now Father; you've made your point."

"And if I don't? What are you going to do about it? It's a grave sin to strike a Catholic priest."

"Then it's a good thing I'm not Catholic," I smiled thinking, 'damn, I really like this guy. Reverend Fisher is a good man although he is a bit stiff, tight-assed and pious. He isn't the kind of guy you could have a beer with or tell a bawdy joke to.'

"Exactly to the point. That's one of the things I'm here to talk to you about," he said, letting go of my wrist, "And Stanley will do. I'll not stand on formalities with someone who will soon be family and this is a social visit.

Do you have any good Irish whiskey about? It's freezing out here......"

"So let me get this straight, Richard, it was your idea to have Christmas now?" Stanley asked my big sweetheart.

"Yea, and if I wasn't so stubborn and told Beth that I loved her we would have had Christmas on Christmas."

"You aren't the only one who is stubborn," my cousin Stanley said taking a sip of water and looking right at me. "You two couldn't wait until the upcoming Christmas?"

"Why should we?" Richard answered, "If we had you wouldn't be partaking in this fine kosher turkey you are enjoying now."

"Kosher?" Stanley replied putting his fork down, and when I explained how and where we got it he started laughing.

"Well Margaret did tell me your fiancé marched to his own drum," followed by making motions with his hand over his plate and saying something in Latin, "There now the turkey on my plate is New Testament," Stanley said solemnly taking a bite. We both burst out laughing

"Let me in on the joke," Richard said looking puzzled.

This got me laughing all over again, "Sweetheart, Stanley is kidding. He can't really do that. His church and the local Synagogue are adjacent to each other. They also share a parking lot, 2/3's of which is owned by the Synagogue.

The Parish owns the field. Stanley and Rabbi Ginsberg got together when Stanley took over the parish. The Parish built a large recreation hall and party house there for weddings and such.

Stanley rent's the hall out to them for a dollar per event in consideration for the parking for one dollar a week."

"That sounds very reasonable. Neighbors should look out for one another."

"Please pass the dressing? Elizabeth," Stanley asked and when I did, "have you set the date for the wedding yet?"

"We're thinking September or early October when the fall colors are in full display."

"Marvelous, please pass the gravy. You need to get your pre-marriage classes out the way. I'll come here to give them to you if you like."

"I hardly think I need classes on how to be married, Stanley," Richard announced," I was married for over twenty years and have first hand on the job training."

"I'll concede to that; however the Church prefers that you both do and I'll keep them as informal as possible. The next subject is your Catechism Classes, Richard. Elizabeth can take them with you as a refresher course."

"Fine, whatever it takes."

"I must say you are being reasonable about it, Ricky. I really thought I'd get more resistance from you."

"Why shouldn't I be reasonable, Pal? It's not like you're a stiff necked pious Papist with a stick up his ass; besides you can take a punch. I respect that. I do have one small request though."

"Done, what is it?"

"Will you grant me absolution to avoid eternal damnation in the fires of hell for knocking you ass over teakettle? You can wave a drumstick over my head and say something in Latin."

"Only in consideration for a rematch, man-to-man. Do you play chess?"

"I can hold my own. I learned it from Tom working the midnight shift when the jail is totally locked down."

"Good because you are stuck with me for the next few days or until the weather clears....."

It was spring before we knew it. Beth and I were outside working in the yard and as always she delights in watching the buds bloom of the first flowers of spring; starting with the purple, white and pink crocuses peeking up through the snow followed by the bright red tulips and our favorite's, the yellow daffodils........

Our flower beds are magnificent, bursting in glorious color as the grass is taking on its rich green color.

I threw a lower bearing in my engine and because of the high mileage and the transmission starting to slip; repairing both would be throwing good money after bad.

Richard suggested I buy a new vehicle and taking his advice I decided on a small pickup truck.

We went to the library to do our research going on line for prices and such. I decided on a Toyota Tacoma 2-wheel drive, four cylinder standard shift. I did my homework down to the penny and arranged for a pre-approved loan with affordable payments.

Richard knew the advertising salesperson at the local paper and made a telephone call to her.

We would know about any specials before they were printed and distributed for sale and that is exactly what we did. We went to the dealer a half hour before it opened and waited by my soon to be new truck.........

Beth was magnificently hardnosed but civil for the most part. I honestly never had so much fun at a car dealership before. I let her do almost all the talking. Beth dressed as she dresses for work, conservatively and professionally, and with her hair pinned up. Actually Beth looked like an attorney with the leather portfolio she brought with her for her paperwork.

She ran the young car salesman ragged with frustration by getting the sales manger on the floor several times and then afraid to come out of his office, catching them both in several....shall we say misstatements.

Actually the young car salesman, Bob was his name, and no more than nineteen or twenty pissed Beth off two minutes upon greeting us in the parking lot. It went downhill for him from that point on.

"Good morning, Sir. Are you interested in buying a truck today?"

"Good morning, young man. I'm Richard Adams," I replied, shaking his hand. My lady is interested in this truck," I patted the hood, "He's all yours, Elizabeth," and then I stood back to watch.

"Well, she really doesn't want this truck, Richard; its bare bones with no amenities such as courtesy mirrors in the visors or nice upholstery. It has a standard transmission while this truck over here....."

My lady interrupted. Beth's hands were on her hips and she gave her head a little toss. I could see the flash of anger in her eyes; this young man was in for it.

"Excuse me junior, I'm standing right here. Didn't your mother teach you any manners? Do you want to make a sale today or not? Am I wasting my time with you? Shall I deal directly with the sales manager and save us both the trouble?"

"But ma'am we just got it in this morning. It isn't even priced yet."

"Nonsense! The invoice sticker is on the window. It's exactly what I want."

"Can you drive a standard, Mrs. Adams?" Beth looked at me and we both smiled inwardly, thinking, 'Junior thinks we're married.'

"Yes, I can drive a standard. Can you give birth?"

It was all I could do to keep from laughing when he looked at me for support. I held my hands up in the air palms out and shook my head in surrender.

"No, ma'am, I can't."

"I didn't think so. Perhaps you are remembering your manners. Let's dispense with all the foolish questions and assumptions about each other and get serious.

Here is the advertising flyer from the paper. I'm willing to pay the advertised price minus fifteen hundred dollars trade in for mine.

It says right here, drive it in or tow it. Your trade is worth fifteen hundred dollars on any new vehicle."

"We can't do that if the truck is on sale, we'll lose money."

"You can and you won't lose money. The paper specifically states any new vehicle. There are no exclusions or disclaimers anywhere in print. It can't be already sold because this is the first day and first 5 minutes of the sale. Didn't you say it came in this morning?"

"Well if you'll step inside to my office, I'm sure we can reach some arrangement. If the monthly payments are a problem I can put you into a nice lease."

"If frogs had wings they wouldn't bump their bottoms every time they jump. I believe we had already covered the subject of assumptions."

"But if I know how much you can afford to pay per month, it will help me put you in the right vehicle, Elizabeth."

"This is not a social call young man. Ma'am or Ms. will do. I'm here to get the best price. You are here to make money for your boss. I won't be financing through this dealership; I will be paying cash. There is one more thing."

"Yes, Mrs. Adams."

"Much better, Mrs. Adams has a nice ring to it. Please insure that there is plenty of fresh coffee available during our negotiations..."

For the next two hours the sales manager came up with every excuse in the world. Beth countered them all with facts, starting with the sales manager's contention the newspaper misprinted the price and it was out of their hands.

Beth countered with; that's not my problem it's yours. There are several court cases ruling in the buyer's favor for just this occasion and the remedies involved. I've printed them out for your convenience if you would like to read them."

"But ma'am, you have to understand my position," the sales manager said squirming.

"Fine as long as you understand mine. I'm aware of the dealer holdback from Toyota but not the actual percent allowed to you. If that mentioned profit is not enough the newspaper can give you free advertising to make up the difference.

What a shame the newspaper did that to you; how embarrassing. I'm sure you are not engaging in the old bait and switch and then blaming the newspaper.

You are such nice people here. Before I forget, I have copies of court decisions on that subject. The outcome is not pretty."

"Surely you are not suggesting we are doing that now?"

"I'll tell you what. You are such nice people I don't doubt you at all. There are four people right here who know it's the newspaper's mistake. The four of us will drive down there to straighten things out. I'm sure between the four of us we can work something out."

"That won't be necessary, Ma'am."

"Please, I insist on it. Richard has a camcorder in his truck. We'll take it along with us and record the whole thing; turn the tables on them for a change and see how they like it; make it an exercise in our First Amendment Rights....."

To make a long story short Beth purchased a different truck, a dark green one in the next trim level; bucket seats, a better stereo system and air conditioning at her price and below budget saving the equivalent of two car payments to put down on the principle.

Beth even negotiated a spray in truck bed liner and deluxe floor mats. Of course the dealership made a profit. Not as much as they liked but a small profit nonetheless. All I did was drink coffee, eat the complimentary donuts and watch the show.........

"Well, what do you think of my negotiating skills sweetheart?" I asked as we walked towards his truck.

"I think they are glad to see us leave, well, you anyway," and I gave him a pinch on the ass. "Manners, sweetheart, manners," I warned sternly and then smiling and laughing.

"Ouch, don't take it out on me, Mrs. Adams. Did you see the look on their faces when you wrote the check and they realized we aren't married?" Richard stopped walking and grabbed me, pulling me close to kiss my lips.

"You did well, baby. I'm impressed and proud of you. It's a beautiful spring day. Let's buy a couple bottles of wine, some fresh fruit and a couple of submarine sandwiches to celebrate your masterful negotiating skills with a picnic......."

We made our purchases and went home to change into comfortable clothing suitable for the weather. I put everything into my old backpack-book bag from college while Richard carried the canvas tarps and blankets.

We hiked out to the swimming hole at the creek and spread our tarp and blankets down. It wasn't a big creek as far as they go. It had many twists and turns for miles and miles along its bed and stony bottom; the water is clear and fresh.

"As you can see, Beth, the water is high and fast moving now because of the spring rain and melting snow. It will slow down during the summer.

I built a wood and earth damn over there and then dug a temporary channel to divert the water during construction. This natural pool is one of the deepest spots in Spring Creek, hence the name being spring fed.

Here is one of the concrete spillways and look this is the lever and crank to raise or lower the steel plate to adjust the water flow. The other spillway is over there. They have been up since Bea died.

The swimming pool is about 6 feet deep on the average, 10 feet across or so and approximately 50 feet long between the spill ways. I put some big boulders in to sit on to rest or whatever.

I walked and fished this creek as a boy; swam and cooled off during the summer. I found this deep section then by chance. It was one of the main reasons I bought the property from Tom McMillan.

He caught me swimming here when I was ten and tanned my hide......"

I knew this story, Margaret told me in great detail and this is the short version:

Tom McMillan brought Richard back to her several times with a sore bottom to no avail. Richard defiantly returned to swim when the weather was hot.

Tom told Margaret, "Either that boy is the bravest son-of- a-gun I ever laid my eyes on or is just plain crazy. I put the belt to him half a dozen times and he didn't utter a sound. Afterward the boy merely looked defiantly at me and smiled. I may as well hit a fence post for all the good it did me.

I had to chase him down every time, most times right through the creek bed. You got your hands full with that one, Margaret."

Margaret said that was the only thing Richard ever disobeyed her about. They finally put their heads together and she and Tom came up with a solution; Tom gave Richard a part-time job working on the farm during the summer months and let him swim in the creek under his watchful eye sometimes joining him.

Richard continued working for him during the summers and then after school. Tom worked him hard, paying him a man's wage and gradually increased his responsibilities.

Tom was also a Correction Officer and confirmed bachelor working the midnight shift and farming during the day. Margaret said Tom was a ladies' man and loved the women.

He kept trying to fix Richard up to gain experience with women, saying, "You're never too young to start. There's the marrying kind like Beatrice, and then the ones to have a good time with. Remember to be polite and respectful. Just because they put out and want to have a good time doesn't necessarily make them bad girls."

Richard refused to budge. Bea was his one and only; talk about loyalty and not straying by giving in to his raging hormones.

Nevertheless Tom encouraged my sweetheart to take the Correction Officer Job for the benefits and Richard almost didn't because he had to cut off his ponytail...talk about stubborn.

Thank God he did or I would never have met him. Margaret told me these things the night I slapped my love's face and I left crying to go see her.

".........Go figure, Beth, Tom tanned my hide and boy was he fast in those days. He gave me a job picking up stones and such before letting me work with his cows.

He taught me carpentry, wiring and plumbing; how to make a living with my hands. He taught me how to play chess; one of these days I'm going to beat Stanley. Tom wanted me to take over the farm after he retired. I'm not cut out to be a farmer, Beth.

Tom retired from State Service and moved to California where the babes are; his words not mine. He sold me the property with the understanding that I maintain the family cemetery and to see that he is buried there when his time comes."