Hero Looking For Redemption

"I'm not sure how to do this, Kitten. We never shared a bed when we were kids."

"Yeah, you didn't want your stupid little sister around then."

She was right, I didn't want her around. I felt like she had taken everything from me. Not only had she been born on the same day as me but she was born at the same minute. Out of the entire year, I had my own special day for five years then she came along and took. Then she took all of my parents attention. Part of me felt cheated by my younger sister, though none of it had been her fault.

"I'm sorry, Kitten. I was dumb and just... I was stupid."

She grabbed my hand and helped me move closer to her.

"It's ok, Benny. I understand, now. We're good."

I kissed her forehead and let sleep take me.

Her back was to me and she was pushing on my hardening cock. She smelled so good and my lips were drawn to her neck. There was a fog around us, so this was a dream, a great dream.

She rolled over and looked at me, beautiful eyes of ice smiling at me. My lips went to hers, savoring their taste. My hands went to her body as hers found mine. I squeezed her hips to me and felt her moan in my mouth.

Her tongue was magical, the way it moved in my mouth. Her fingers ran through my hair and she pulled me tighter to her face. I pulled her shorts down and felt the skin on her ass, so smooth and a little slick from her lotion.

She took off her shirt and I was staring at her beautiful breasts, a large B or small C cup. They were gorgeous and, as she pulled my boxers down, my lips went to her nipples. I sucked on them. Her hands were in my hair again and she arched her back, pushing more of her breasts into my mouth.

I pushed her on her back and got between her legs, my lips finding hers once more. As I slowly entered her wet pussy, I let out a loud gasp. I entered slowly, pushing in then sliding out.

I took my time, pushing into her then slowly pulling out. At my pace, it took me well over ten minutes to get all 7 inches into her tight pussy. When I finally worked myself into her, she grabbed my hips and held me in place.

After several minutes, our lips still locked together, I began pulling out then sliding back into. With slow strokes, I pulled all but the head out then slid it back into her. Her hips started figuring out my rhythm and would come up to meet my thrusts. What a glorious feeling it was, a lot better than any other dream I'd ever had before.

In and out, we worked ourselves closer. Her breathing was becoming harder and I tried to contain myself. The tight grip of not only her pussy but her hands all over my body was fantastic.

"Oh, Benny," she whispered.

She clutched her legs together and I felt her orgasm rush out of her. Though I didn't want to stop, I couldn't hold mine back and I came with her, burying myself as far inside of her as I could. Once we could move again, I laid down next to her and she scooted into my body, my arms wrapping around her.

With a smile, the dream faded to black.

I awoke to sunlight on my face. My first thought was about the dream and I hoped it hadn't been a wet one. I touched my boxers and was thankful they were dry, though my crotch felt sticky.

I raised my head off of the pillow and saw that I was alone in the bed. I sat up and just looked around the bedroom. I didn't know where she was but I'd see her in a little bit.

Her alarm clock read 1:36 and I was surprised. I hadn't slept this late in years. I felt rested, something I hadn't felt since who knows when.

The front door closed and I heard footsteps coming up the stairs.

"Good afternoon, sleepy head," Kate said. She was wearing one of my sweatshirts and a pair of her shorts. Her hair was in a ponytail and she was smiling. Even though she looked different than how she looked last night, she was still gorgeous.

"Hey, where'd you go?"

She walked over to the bed and sat down, moving right next to me. "I had to go get the morning after pill. We were too into the moment, I guess."

Once again, I was slow. Then it dawned on me.

"That happened? You and I had..."

She was no longer smiling. "Yeah, Benny. We had sex last night."

I jumped out of the bed and ran to my room. I quickly grabbed some clothes and ran out the door. She was calling for me through her tears but I couldn't face her. The only thing on my brain was I raped my sister.

I drove, got lost on a back road some place and sat in my car. I went from screaming at myself to crying to figuring out a way to rationalize what I had done then back again. If I had my phone, I know she would be calling and texting me. I didn't know what to say.

By the time I made it back to the house, it was after 10 and all of the lights were off. I snuck inside and locked myself in the den. I wasn't even going to attempt to sleep tonight so I just sat at the desk, staring at the wall.

At 6:30 I heard her get up. She didn't say anything as she got ready for school and I didn't come out of the den to try and talk to her. She left at 7:45 and I finally walked out. After a quick shower, I got in my car and drove to the hospital.

I didn't say anything as I walked through the halls, just waving at people I knew. I stood in front of a large, black door and debated whether or not to knock. The debate ended when the door opened.

"Oh, Benjamin, I'm sorry. Can I help you?"

Dr. Angela Myers, psychiatrist was on the door.

"Dr. Myers, I need help. If you have a minute."

"Of course, come in."

I walked into her office and sat down in the leather chair in front of her desk. She sat behind it and waited.

It all poured out of me. Dad's death, my leaving, Kate's suicide attempt, my own attempt, and Mom's death. I asked why I was having night terrors and why couldn't I sleep peacefully unless my sister was with me. I held nothing back, except the night of incestous sex with my sister.

Dr. Myers sat there a moment, absorbing it all.

"You're afraid to let yourself feel pain. You want to save the world and you can't be a hero if you give in to pain. But pain is a part of everyone's life, accept it and let it help you become a better person.

"And accept that you couldn't save your parents and it wasn't your fault they died. Sometimes, life takes those closest. I wish I knew why but it happens. Death happens.

"As far as your sister goes, you love her, no matter how you might have felt before your Dad's death. You may have been able to stop her from attempting what she did but, then again, maybe not. You're just one man. Maybe she could have helped you through yours, we can never really know because that is the past. The point is to look towards the future.

"I think your night terrors come from the fact you want to save everyone, you need to be everyone's hero but, in your head, you will always fall short. You don't see the fact that you brought your sister to this town and changed her life made you her hero.

"And the reason you sleep better when she's with you is because she forgave you and you can't forgive yourself. Learn to forgive yourself because you deserve it. You deserve to be happy."

I sat there, stunned by everything. It all made perfect sense yet at the same time it felt so alien to me. I had only seen the things I couldn't do, all of my failures, that I didn't see what I had done.

"Let yourself be happy, Benjamin."

I thanked her for her time and wandered out of her office. I got to my car and sat there. Then I started it up and drove home in a daze.

I sat down at the kitchen table, staring at the wall. I didn't know when Kate would be home but I needed to talk to her. I hurt her yesterday and I needed to explain things to her. I just hoped it would make sense.

I sat there for over an hour before she walked in. She was distraught and looked it. Her hair was down, a little oily and unkempt, and she was wearing a sweatshirt with jeans. It hurt that it wasn't my sweatshirt she wore yesterday.

"What do you want?" she demanded.

"To talk."

"Now you want to talk? You left me yesterday, alone to sit and cry, but now you want to talk."

She turned to walk away.

"Sit down, close your mouth, and open your ears!"

She stopped and looked at me. I wanted her to sit down but she stood still.

"I'm sorry. Not just for yesterday but for everything. For all of the pain I've ever caused you in your life.

"For too long, I've felt responsible for Mom and Dad's deaths. I also felt responsible for those scars on your wrists. If I had been there, maybe it wouldn't have happened. Or maybe it still would have. I've finally come to grips with the fact that I couldn't save you then. But I did realize that I saved you when Mom died. I brought you here, gave you a new home, a new beginning.

"And, these past few years, you saved my life. You gave me a purpose. You also gave me a reason to be happy.

"I hurt you yesterday because I am afraid to be happy, like I don't deserve it because I couldn't save Mom and Dad and I wasn't there for you. You've shown me I do deserve to be happy and I should try to start."

I stopped and took a deep breath, readying myself for not only what I needed her to know but also for her response.

"All this time I wanted to be the hero, to save the world, but I didn't see that while I was trying to save everyone else, you were saving me. You're my hero, Kitten."

She didn't say anything, just stared at me.

"I will do anything you ask me to do, Katherine. Just say something."

"What if I asked you to leave?"

I got up from the table and headed to the door, my heart breaking, but I held myself together so it would be easier for her to let me go. "Then I will get everything transferred to your name and you'd never see me again."

She started to cry. "But you promised you'd never leave me."

It took a moment for me to realize what she meant then I ran back to her, grabbing her in my arms and hugging her tight. "I'm so sorry, Kitten. As long as you want me around, I'll never leave you."

"I have never felt that good before, that loved," she said, crying into my shoulder and squeezing me."Then you left me alone and I felt like I did two years ago. I started thinking I wasn't good enough, maybe I;m actually broken-"

I kissed her lips to make her stop talking, to make her stop thinking that way. "Yesterday, being with you, was the greatest thing I have ever felt. Sex with you was beyond amazing and it was so surreal that I thought I was dreaming."

I kissed her again, softer and longer.

"Not just the sex, though. Being out, with you and your friends, that was the most fun I have ever had. Nothing compares to when you hold my hand as I sleep."

She kissed me, running her hands through my hair. My hands went to her cheeks, wiping the tears from her skin as I traced every inch of her face with my fingers.

"Was the sex really that good?" she asked me when we finally stopped to breath.

"It was, Kitten. I am so glad it wasn't a dream."

She stepped away from me. "Prove it."

I wasn't slow this time, when she ran up the stairs, I was right after her. She went straight for her room and I tackled her onto the bed. We laughed for a second before we started kissing again.

I pulled her sweatshirt off and began kissing her neck. She was moaning and running her fingers through my hair.

I took her hands and looked at her wrists. She caught me and tried to pull them away. I kissed both of her scars, my eyes locked with hers. I wasn't quite sure why but I knew I had to, like I finally accepted what she had done and what I failed to do.

She pulled her hands away and grabbed my shirt, pulling it over my head. We kissed again, our tongues working together and exploring our mouths. I worked her shirt over her head, pulling my lips away from hers for just a moment. Our lips found each other again and, with a smile, we continued kissing.

Then, pulling my lips away, I kissed down her body. As my lips touched her chest, my hands pulled the straps of her bra down. Surprisingly, I skipped past her breasts and left her bra on her. My tongue found her belly button and I licked it, knowing she was ticklish there.

"Stop, Benny." She curled into a ball and laughed. I crawled back up to her and kissed her lips again.

Kate pushed me onto my back and crawled on top of me. She started towards my lips then quickly changed direction and kissed my chest, softly touching her lips to my scar. It felt good and it felt like she was releasing me.

"These need to go," she said just before she pulled my pants and boxers down.

I laid there naked, slightly embarrassed.

Then she got off the bed and took her pants off. I just stared at her, the perfection of her white legs. My eyes went to her crotch and I saw the trimmed blonde hair over her pussy. Then she took off her bra and she was naked in front of me.

"Wow, Kitten. You're beautiful."

She smiled then jumped on top of me, kissing me again and bringing her crotch above mine. I could feel her heat flowing from her and I wondered if she could feel mine. It didn't matter as she lowered herself, slowly, onto me. In one, steady and slow movement, I was all the way inside of my sister.

"Benny," she said with a gasp.

I pulled her to me and we kissed. Every kiss between us was so full of passion, so wild, I thought my brain would melt from our heat.

She was moving up and down, slowly, and it felt so good. Her body would shake every time I was fully inside of her then she'd giggled or smile. I was lost to the moment and all I could think of was my baby sister rising and falling with my cock inside of her.

My hands squeezed her hips and I began pushing up into her as she came down onto me. We worked at a good rhythm, our mouths never parting. It felt like we were breathing together, if we breathed at all.

I could feel her juices flowing out of her and part of me wanted to taste them. She sat up and I stared at her, the way her body moved as she rode me. This felt like another dream, I didn't think I could get this lucky. Then she looked at me, a smile on her face and I reached up, touching her cheek. I was lucky.

Kate began moving faster, her nails digging into my chest. Her mouth started opening and closing, soft moans escaping her lips. She fell forward and started riding me harder, thrusting herself down as hard as possible. I fell in sync with her and wrapped my arms around her.

"Fuck!"

I grabbed her shoulders and rammed her onto me harder and her eyes squeezed shut as her orgasm took over. Her entire body tensed up and I felt her shake as it started in her toes and shoulders. When it finally reached her pussy, I felt it run out of her. I was so focused on her body and her orgasm, I didn't realize mine was so close.

"Kitten, I'm close."

Her body relaxed and she started working her body on my cock again.

"Let me know, I'll move and jerk you off."

It was too late and I just lifted her off of me. My cock spit cum out, shooting it up her back. I thought she would say something or move but she just let me cum. Our bodies went limp and she just laid on top of me.

"I love you, Kitten."

"I love you, too, Benny."

Once we could move again, she got off of me and went to her bathroom. I started to follow her then stopped.

"Am I allowed to shower with you?" I yelled over the running water.

"Only if you can control yourself."

"I'll shower alone, then."

She walked out of her bathroom and grabbed my hand. "Get your ass in here."

I got under the water and let it wash over me while Kate soaped herself up. I couldn't help but stare at her, she was gorgeous. And my penis thought the same thing as it started growing again.

She bent over to wash her legs and I grabbed her hips, pushing myself to her exposed pussy but not entering it.

She laughed. "I said you had to control yourself."

I grabbed her and brought her lips to mine, feeling the rush her kiss brought me. "I can't help it. You're so gorgeous and you make my blood boil."

"Hmm," she moaned with a smile. "How can I say no to that?"

She turned around and bent over, placing her hands on the shower wall. I grabbed her hips again and put the head of my cock at her pussy. It was really hot and I couldn't wait to plunge right into it.

Self control was tested as I slowly worked myself into her. She was very tight, tighter than she had had been a little bit ago.

"Oh god, Kitten, you're tight."

I worked my way into her, pushing slowly and enjoying her moans.

"Geez, Benny, that feels so good. It feels so deep already."

I slid into her with one push. My fingers dug into her hips and I pulled out then slid back into her. She was so wet, I slid all of the way into her and our pelvic bones touched.

I saw her fingers try to grip into the shower tile and she arched her back. Something possessed me and I started just thrusting into her with little abandon. All I could hear was her panting and moaning. There was something about her, bent over and her back arched, that sent my body into a manic state and I couldn't hold back my orgasm.

"Oh shit, Kitten!"

I pulled out of her and pointed my cock down at the drain and watched as another massive load went down the drain.

"Wow, brother," Kate said as she stood up, her knees shaking a little bit.

"I'm sorry, Kitten, I didn't mean to cum so early. You're just..."

She turned around and kissed me. "That was perfect, Benny. But I hope you don't expect sex any time you want it."

I hugged her close and stared into her perfect blue eyes. "Not at all."

She gave me a quick kiss then finished her shower. Once she was done and out, I quickly scrubbed myself then rinsed off. I went and put fresh clothes on then headed downstairs.

"I was thinking turkey burgers and fries for dinner," she told me, already having the small grill out on the counter and the oven on. She was wearing my sweatshirt again and either she had just panties on or nothing at all.

"That's fine. Since we didn't see any yesterday, want to watch the Monday night game with me?"

"Of course."

I went to the living room and flipped on the TV, quickly finding ESPN and muting it. I love football but, sometimes, I hated the pre-game commentary. I headed back to the kitchen and leaned against the wall, a smile on my face.

"Can I ask you something?"

She turned and looked at me, the ground turkey still being flattened in her hands. "I guess."

"How long have you been planning all of this?"

"Well, maybe about 20 minutes. Burgers sounded good and you have to have fries with burgers."

I walked to her and wrapped my arms around her waist. "Not that, Kitten. This."

She smiled and kissed me. "I wasn't, actually. I just like being near you."

"If you didn't plan this, why did you tell Cari and Jan I was cute Friday?"

"You were home!" She yelled, pushing herself away from me. "I knew I heard someone come in."

I smiled and let my cheeks turn pink.

"Jan brought it up," she continued as she put the second burger onto the little grill. "I think she has a crush on you."

I just nodded my head and made a mental note to talk to her later. If I was having a relationship with my sister, a female ally could be beneficial. And I couldn't hurt her feelings.

"I never had plans to be in a relationship with my brother, but you are the only one that makes me feel safe. Then we started sleeping together and I realized that I couldn't sleep unless you were with me so of course I told them. Then they kept pestering me about you and wanted to know if I'd seen you naked or something."

She washed her hands and went to the freezer, grabbing the bag of fries.

"You have now," I said with a smile.

"Yeah, and they were firing off the questions yesterday faster than I could answer them."