by jack30341
Found this story quite enjoyable. Wondered about the ending but if that's the way it ends ~ that's the way it ends. Hope to be reading more of your writing in the future. Enjoyable Write.
Every step was very real and I know you have plans to continue the story . I liked it very much .
and a Damn Good style it is
and a Damn Good style it is
I have heard many people commenting on "whats missing"
Well what is missing is, you don't tease long enough. You will start off great, then you jump into the sack!
Stories like this need to linger. Give a little, and linger some more. It builds tension and creates a feeling of foreplay.
I hope you don't do this in real life!
Like some of your others, I find this one easy to read and more believable than many. I have to agree with one of the comments, though. You don't lead up to things enough, not enough of the steamy details. Not griping, just giving an opinion. Keep up the good work.