I Want To Be Around

"You clean up pretty good," she said. I stood with my mouth open and stuttered trying to answer her. Patrick the player was speechless. "Earth to Patrick; come in please," Cassidy teased.

"My God, you're beautiful," I finally got out.

She smiled and showed her dimples, pleased at my reaction; every woman likes to hear that they're beautiful. Cassidy took my hand and I helped her into the car. I was driving my dad's vintage Jaguar XKE; my truck just wouldn't cut it on this night.

The awards dinner was held in the ball room of a large hotel. I must say I was impressed with the whole affair. Not only was the food pretty good, which is unusual at these things, but the speeches after dinner were short and concise. Several people got awards for outstanding work, Cassidy was one of them. Then the band set up and the dancing part of the evening began. Like I needed an excuse to hold Cassidy in my arms.

Cassidy introduced me to her friends and some of the honchos of the company. I guess I made a good impression because I could see some of her female co-workers pointing and smiling at me. There was one really funny thing that happened. Cassidy was dancing with the CEO or big cheese or something and I was at the bar getting a refill on my Coke. One of the salesman types started trying to sell me life insurance.

I politely told him I didn't think this was the time or place for that type of thing, but he insisted. He said he could get some preliminary info and give me a tentative rate quote and we could get together another time to finalize everything. I knew what was going to happen but I answered his questions.

He got my age, my general health, my height and weight, and the fact that I don't smoke and drink in strict moderation. I had to smile when he asked what I did for a living. When he heard that I was an explosives expert it was hilarious watching him try to back pedal. People in my line have a hard time getting life insurance because of the extreme danger in the job. I laughed out loud when he said he had to go dance with his wife and almost ran away.

Two things marred the evening. Riley was there with his flavor of the week and he kept smiling and winking at me; sure that his plan was working, I guess. The other thing was good old Steve showed up and apparently was upset that Cassidy came with me. He'd told her he broke his leg and couldn't go to the dinner; I guess he thought she should have stayed at home since he couldn't' go.

It turns out he broke his ankle not his leg; he was wearing what I think they call a walking cast. Personally I think he came just to show the big wigs how dedicated he was. Right after my insurance buddy left Steve using a crutch, joined me at the bar.

He introduced himself and said, "You know Cassidy was supposed to be my date and I don't appreciate you horning in."

You're an arrogant ass I thought. This is going to be almost as much fun as my insurance buddy had been. "The way I heard it, you called her and broke the date; something about a broken leg and you couldn't make it. Now I don't know if you expected her to stay home or come over to your place to nurse you but you were dead wrong."

Steve started to sputter and tried to say something but I interrupted him.

I grinned at him, which really ticked him off and continued, "Another thing, you're acting like you two are an item, but Cassidy doesn't see it that way. She told me you guys were co-workers and friends; she doesn't think of you as a boyfriend or whatever."

Steve looked like he was trying to think of how to get away with embarrassing himself anymore when Cassidy came up and took my arm.

"Oh, hi Steve. I didn't think you were coming tonight. It's good to see you up and around." She turned to me, smiled and said, "C'mon Patrick, dance with me. I don't get you out on the dance floor very much"

The rest of the evening went very well with the exception of Riley grinning like an idiot all night. I took Cassidy back to her apartment and walked her to the door. She put her arms around my neck, looked into my eyes, and gave me a very intense kiss.

Cassidy unlocked her door, turned to me and asked, "Would you like to come in for a nightcap?"

My first thought was, "Damn right". I knew what a nightcap and more time with Cassidy would bring and I couldn't bring myself to go there. Riley's plan had started this but I wasn't going to lie or take advantage of the situation.

"Can I have a rain check? I've got a web conference early tomorrow about a job. I need to have my game face on when I talk to these guys. Okay?"

Cassidy looked disappointed and put on a playful pout. "Okay, but I hope you cash it soon," she said.

"Let's meet at Dooley's Wednesday evening about 7," I suggested.

"Deal," she answered. She gave me another kiss that made my knees weak and went inside.

Damn, damn, damn, I thought. I am such an idiot. I should have told Riley the plan was dead the first time I had second thoughts about Cassidy. Hell, I shouldn't have even got involved to begin with. I was going to lose the only girl I'd ever met that I want to spend more than a couple of dates with. My dad had told me over and over as I grew up that a man was responsible for his actions and the consequences. It's been my actions and now my consequences to deal with. Idiot.

The next afternoon I got hold of Riley and told him to come to Dooley's Wednesday evening. He replied that he didn't know if he could free up the time and I almost went ballistic.

"Riley, get your butt to Dooley's on Wednesday. You said and I quote 'I want to be around', well that's the day all this comes to an end. If you want a front row seat, be there." I slammed down the phone.

*************

Okay, it's Wednesday evening and the stage is set. This sting operation is about to come to the end. Tonight will be the culmination of a quickly devise plan and two months of a secret operation. There is only one problem that's gonna blow the entire thing out of the water.

I can't and won't go through with it.

Without my participation, all the planning, the "work", and the expectations will never happen. I don't care; I can't do what I was supposed to do; tonight or any other night. My so called best friend is going to be pissed at me; so be it. He may have bigger problems; like me kicking his ass. Cassidy is going to be more than angry when she finds out what the plan was; that worries me more than anything.

I'm sitting at a bar waiting an hour early waiting for her to join me. Shortly after Cassidy gets here my life will change in one of two ways; for the better with a bright future or it will go down the toilet. I can only hope that she will be mad instead of hurt; that she hasn't began to fall in love with me. If I read her invitation to have a nightcap at her apartment correctly, I think she will be hurt.

Staring into the bottom of my drink I think this may be more than a one drink night. Looking around I see Riley sitting at a table near the dance floor. He with three other guys, one of which is Jack, the jerk that was harassing Cassidy. I was surprised that Riley and he were friends.

Riley came over and joined me at the bar. "Hey buddy, tonight's the night huh?"

I nodded and pointing at Jack and the other two with my chin said, "What's up with Mr. Personality there?

"Well you know Cassidy shut him down too, so I thought he would enjoy tonight's entertainment," Riley replied.

"Riley this was supposed to be about you and Cassidy. It's not a show and we don't need an audience." He was seriously pissing me off.

"Well I better get back to my front row seat," he said with a grin. He returned to his table to wait.

Cassidy was about 15 minutes early, saw me at the bar and joined me. She put her arm around my shoulder, leaned in, and kissed my cheek. "Hey sailor, looking for a good time?"

Her greeting made me feel worse and altered my plan. I was going to tell her the whole story but I would do it outside, away from prying eyes. There was no need to humiliate Cassidy any more than I had too.

"Let's go outside, I've got something I need to tell you," I suggested. She agreed and we walked out to the parking lot.

"Cassidy, I've got some to confess. Please let me get it all out before you say anything, okay?" She looked puzzled but nodded. "Before I start I want you to know that I'm falling in love with you."

She smiled and stepped toward me but I put up my hand to stop her. "Cassidy, I don't know if you'll even want to be around me after I finish, so please just hold back."

I told her about me and Riley's friendship, his lies about her and him, his asking me to help him and what we'd planned. I explained that from the first I'd seen a different girl than the one he described to me but he was my lifelong friend and he wouldn't lie to me would he? I told her that I just found out a few days ago the he had lied to me. So I thought the best thing to do was to come clean and tell her all about it. Every grubby little detail.

"What were you going to do, humiliate me in front of everyone in Dooley's?"

I nodded and replied, "That was the plan, at least at first." Riley wanted to see you hurt; according to him the way you hurt him." I continued before she could say anything. "I know he was full of it, but I didn't know that when I agreed to help him. I paused and said, "But I couldn't do that to you. That's why I asked you to come outside with me."

Cassidy just looked at me for about an hour, actually it was only a minute or so but it seemed like an hour. I expected her to get very angry, I expected that she might cry, I even thought she might slap me or kick me in the gonads. I didn't expect what she did.

"That was a mean, hurtful, despicable thing to do," Cassidy said with a very sad voice. "I thought better of you Patrick." She looked at me for another few seconds, turned, and walked to her car. She looked at me one more time and drove off.

That went well I thought sarcastically and turned to return to the bar. This was definitely a more than one drink night. As I got to the bar and started to order another Gentleman Jack, in my mind I heard my dad saying, 'Actions and Consequences'. The hell with it, I'm going home I said to myself and left.

I was almost to my truck when Riley, Jack, and the other stooges caught up to me.

"What the hell man? You were supposed to shine her on inside, in front of me and everybody else," he yelled at me as he got in my face.

Riley is almost as tall as I am but about 20 pounds lighter but I stopped him in his tracks by grabbing him around his neck with one hand.

"And you were supposed to be my friend. Friends don't lie to friends and play them." I shook him a couple of times. "What made you do it; you pencil necked pile of garbage?"

Jack started forward, "You really don't want any part of this, believe me," I warned him. He stepped back.

Riley smiled a little in spite of my hold on his neck. "That bitch wouldn't give me the time of day. All that friend's bullshit, as if I wanted a friend. I thought if you screwed with her head I could step in and be a shoulder to cry on. From there it would be easy to get her in my bed."

"You're really something Riley; I'm not quite sure what though," I told him.

I was going to say a lot more but one of the other guys started for me and I threw Riley into him; they both went down. Jack swung a big round house right at me so I popped him in the nose. That's the last thing I remember clearly. Something hit me across the shoulders and the back of my head and I went down. The next few seconds were a jumble of half seen fists and feet.

****************

I opened my eyes and raised my head to look around. Shouldn't have done that; it really hurt. I tried to use my arms to push myself into a sitting position. Shouldn't have done that either; it hurt even more. Before I collapsed I saw that I was in what had to be a hospital room. I guess I was wearing some kind of a monitor because a nurse came into the room very quickly.

"Welcome back to the living," she said with a smile. "The doctor will be right here to answer your questions, okay? Now you just lie still until he tells you that you can move."

The doctor came in and explained that I'd been beat on pretty good. "From the marks on your back, I'd say you were hit at least twice with what was apparently a two by four. You have severely bruised ribs on your right side, your left eye will be black in about an hour, and you have a couple of abrasions on you right cheek. They certainly did a number on you. If it's any consolation you broke the nose of the one called Riley."

I had to smile at that and that hurt too. "How'd I get here doc?"

"Two young ladies brought you in, very pretty by the way. I heard about that Riley guy from the ER doctor when the police brought him and the three others in. I think you would've taken them if they didn't use that two by four," he said with a big smile. He wrote a few things on a chart and continued.

"You've got a very mild concussion so we keep you over night but you should be able to go home tomorrow sometime. I'll have the nurse give you some pain medication and then you can see your two lovely visitors."

The nurse came back with a shot of something that almost immediately made me feel better and left. Shortly after she left the two lovelies, as the doctor called them, came into the room. It was Cassidy and Sarah.

They came to my bedside and Sarah asked giving me a smile, "Aren't you a little old to be getting into a bar fight?"

"I'm certainly too old to be losing one," I replied. "Hey Cassidy. I have to admit that I'm surprised to see you."

"You were blocking the parking lot so Sarah and I thought we'd bring you here."

I looked at Cassidy wishing things were different. "I'm really sorry Cassidy; I shouldn't have gotten involved in Riley's scheme."

She gave me a little smile and answered, "Yeah, it was a rotten thing to do.......but I forgive you. After all you passed the test."

"Test? What test?" Now I was confused.

"I invited you in after the awards dinner just to see how far you were willing to take your little operation." She laughed at the look on my face. "My good friend Sarah told me all about you and Riley before you got home Tuesday."

Looking at Sarah I started to ask about her promise to keep quiet but she beat me to the punch.

"I broke my promise, I know. But I wasn't gonna sit around and let two people I care about do something stupid. I told Cassidy how upset you were, both with Riley and with yourself. She took it from there."

Turning toward Cassidy, well at least as much as I could I said, "If you knew about it Tuesday evening why did you......?"

Cassidy broke in and said, "That's when I decide to invite you to the dinner, I wanted to see how far you would go. You were the perfect gentleman all evening; I couldn't even entice you into my place. That's when I knew that Sarah was right, that you did really care about me."

I was finding it hard to talk; something must be caught in my throat I told myself. Clearing my throat I looked at Sarah and said, "Do me a favor will you Sarah? If you see Riley, no on second thought, go find him and give him a message for me."

"Sure, what message?"

"Tell him I said to remember what I do for a living."

Sarah looked questioningly at me and then she got it. Her eyes opened wide, her lips formed a circle of surprise, and then she started laughing. Very quickly, Cassidy started laughing too.

The next afternoon Cassidy took me home from the hospital. I put my arm around her shoulders and she helped me into the house; I really didn't need the support but I wasn't going to pass up a chance to hold her. She said if I felt like it to meet her at Dooley's on Saturday evening. I was going to be there if I had to crawl.

I met Cassidy at 7 and we only stayed a couple of hours; I was still hurting a little. She had come with a girlfriend so I drove her home. I walked her to her door, actually I sort of hobbled. Cassidy opened her door, turned, stood on her tip toes, and kissed me.

Then she said, "Get lost Patrick. I never want to see you again."

You could use surprised, shocked, stunned or gob smacked or all of the above to describe my reaction. I stood there for a few seconds and turned to leave. What the hell just happened? I thought Cassidy and I were good.

Her door reopened and she stood there giggling. "Just wanted you to know how it felt," she said with a teasing tone. "Come on in here big guy, I promise I won't hurt you. At least not too much."

********************

The next two years were the happiest of my life. My dad and I hired a new office manager slash accountant for our little company; her name is Cassidy Nolan Kelly. A fine Irish lass she is and my wife. Our company card reads: Kelly & Kelly; Explosive Solutions.

I didn't press charges against Riley, Jack and the other two guys. They got their lumps and I felt that I probably deserved the beating. I never saw the two goons again. For some reason Riley thought it best to pull up stakes and find his way to some other city. Last I heard he was in California.

Jack still lives here; I see him every now and then. But he's a bit skittish. If we come into Dooley's or Toby's or someplace and he's there; he quickly leaves. If we're in a place and he comes in and sees us, he turns right around and leaves. I guess he's become anti social; at least where I'm concerned.

Kelly and Kelly also hired Bill Jackson as a part time consultant to plan blasts and set charges. Dad complains that Bill is even slower than I am setting charges, but he's only kidding; slow is good when you work with explosives. Our company needed Bill to assist Dan on the long jobs out of town because I won't be traveling much for the next few years.

Cassidy and I are going to have a baby next month, a boy according to the tests. So I restrict my travel to one or two days at most.

I hope Ole Blue Eyes understands and forgives me. A guy can change his mind about breaking her heart, right?

And "I want to be around"...to see what happens down the road for us...as life goes on.