All Comments on 'Jacob and Kaci'

While this is a great premise and story, the 2nd person viewpoint makes it clumsy at best. It's a very difficult tense to pull off, and you don't quite manage it. Frankly, you too often need to explain the minds of both people, and it's not the most effective to tell the reader what he thinks. It was hot, and very much the kind of thing I'd love to do to my girlfriend, the viewpoint makes it difficult to really enjoy.

Enjoyable story. I would like it better if it was all written in the first person.

Great story of willing non-consent. Keep writing!