All Comments on 'Jim and the Virgin Maid of Honor A'

but am neutral about the bolds and a few other indicators you used for emphasis. Not against, just neutral. Differant than perhaps what I would have used, but differance is what makes things go, doesn't it?

what it gelt mor of a list than a story try giving the story from either side not stoping n giving chris and tehn jim mix it in together also i think you have worked on theending a better so the readers could knw if they got married or not. but welll done it was pretty good :D

The story is on life support for reading and confusion due to the frequency and amount of ". . ." throughout. Why do all these authors keep using this mind clearing only thing so much; all it does is waste space and cause eye strain for readers.

I guess I did use the elipses (. . . ) to excess. I'll try to correct that next time. I DO listen to readers comments and welcome them. Thanks for your thoughts.

Barnabus.

barnabus329@hotmail.com

That was a nice story that you wrote about Jim and Christine. I liked the way you described her losing her virginity to him for the most part even though it seemed that she was somewhat forced by him to give up her virginity. I like how they both enjoyed the sex and how he fell out with her more after the night and thought about marrying her. It would be interesting to write another chapter in the story to explain what happened to them after the wedding and how their relationship grew or ended.

didnt even read it cause all the crap at the beginning was a total buzz kill.... might wanna shorten it :) ..just a thought!

My own first time was like that, reluctant at first but melted. Brought back so many memories.

Sensuous buildup...well and thoughtfully done.

Doesn't matter that she "secretly wanted it"; she said no. Most rapists are convinced that every woman wants their dicks anyway. So: great rape story, bro.

I loved it ! make another one !

Great story, but we need a follow-on story on whether they married or not. It would be a shame if they didn't, after the very well-written description if their night together, both physically and emotionally.